The Most Confusing, Convoluted X-Stories Ever Told

[worstblogever]

This got up in X-Cres, and everyone has stories that are just so convoluted, that they seem implausible, even for a comic book. Enough were quickly thrown around that I figured it might warrant it's own thread to call home. Some examples that came up?

-Shatterstar Saga

-Reignfire

-Psylocke and Jean's power swap

-Psylocke becoming a ninja

-Jean/Phoenix/Maddie

-The origin of Cable

-Copycat replacing Domino before she was ever introduced

-Tessa the spy

-Azazel is Nightcrawler's pappy, a.k.a. "The Draco"

- The Upstarts killin' fellow mutants... for POINTS!

- Nova Roma, Selene, and Magma

Feel free to discuss any of these tales, or throw in your own additions to the mix.

[Swashbuckler]

Poor Nightcrawler. He had such an easy past that made total sense and was connected to several good X-characters and they ruined it all by allowing Chuck Austen to make him the "devils" son. What a stupid storyline. If they had made Belasco his Dad I would understand, but not some new random gimp mutant. Plus that storyline was just horrible. I mean really, Havok peed on Iceman or something!

[Josef F.]

Hello, I am going to spy on this team by creating a false Identity.
Oh look, I even get a suit that gives me cool powers.
That's cool.



OH NO, Now it appears that the fake name has developed it's own personality and is Killling Cyclops! I have betrayed my team to work for a man in a BAD MASK! MUHAAHAHAHAHHAAH



Oh, it's okay, It got rebooted, I'm fine now.

OH NO, Roma info-dumped me and Now Diana Fox is a figment of my imagination.
I suppose this is logical, as it was a traumatic time, and she will live on as a memory of my betrayal

Oh, that's not what's going on?
Kay.



OH NO, I turned into Diana fox for no real reason, wherein my hair changed colour and I gained the powers she got from her suit.

Oh, it's okay, I'm Sage again now.

Oh, I can fly aswell.

[Greg Anderson]

I don't see Cable's origin as convoluted.

[Swashbuckler]

Originally Posted by Greg Anderson

I don't see Cable's origin as convoluted.

Oh no. A baby born from a clone gets a disease from a celestially powered mutant and is sent to the future, cloned himself and grows up becoming a messiah who will end the celestial mutants reign of terror. He comes back in time with his clone and then saves another baby and runs into the future.

[nikbackm]

Originally Posted by Greg Anderson

I don't see Cable's origin as convoluted.

Not if you compare it with Rachel's, no.

[worstblogever]

Originally Posted by Greg Anderson

I don't see Cable's origin as convoluted.

The son of Cyclops and Jean Grey's clone, Madelyne Pryor who was sent to the future after being infected with the techno-organic virus in the past with help from the alternate-reality travelling Rachel Summers, who would find a way to telepathically link Jean Grey and Cyclops to two people named Redd and Slim in the future who could train him to use his powers to keep the t/o virus in check and raise him to be a freedom fighter who would one day return to the past to try to defeat Apocalypse before he raises all sorts of hell in the future.

That's uh... a bit more complicated than boy meets girl and makes a baby who grows up to be a hero.

[escapegoat]

The Draco isn't convoluted....it's just a really bad idea for Nightcrawler's origin.
Badly written too.

[worstblogever]

Originally Posted by escapegoat

The Draco isn't convoluted....it's just a really bad idea for Nightcrawler's origin.
Badly written too.

Well, compared to the rest of them, yes.

But Nightcrawler's dad is an ancient mutant teleporter who's been trapped in an alternate dimension and he tries to play at being a demon, but even though he's trapped in there, he's managed to get out and knock up Earth-bound women like Mystique and whoever Kiwi Black and Abyss' mom's are.

That's a bit weird. It seems more odd than if Mystique was Nightcrawler's dad, and Destiny was his mom.

[Greg Anderson]

Heh heh, okay, point taken. But for me I just see it as a child is born, has a disease that only has a cure in the future and is sent to the future to later come back to the present as a grown man.

[Factor Three]

Factor Three created continuity in order to distract you. Factor Three will crush you while you are pondering the time-tossed origins of the mutant fools Cable and Marvel Girl.

Linear thinking is the downfall of your species.

Factor Three waits for the perfect moment.

[worstblogever]

Originally Posted by Factor Three

Factor Three created continuity in order to distract you. Factor Three will crush you while you are pondering the time-tossed origins of the mutant fools Cable and Marvel Girl.

Linear thinking is the downfall of your species.

Factor Three waits for the perfect moment.

Assuming you're not talking about yourself in third person... yes, the plans of Factor Three, being manipulated by the alien Mutant Master is a good example. The X-Men actually went, "Wait, if you idiots start World War III, the nuclear fallout will not only affect the humans... but us mutants, too!"

Blob, Mastermind, Unus: ... really? Really? Wow. Uh... we really didn't think this one through we just were told, like... kill humans and were all down for it. Just... wow. Sorry dude, our bad.

Ah, the Silver Age.

[Karl H]

Originally Posted by Factor Three

Factor Three created continuity in order to distract you. Factor Three will crush you while you are pondering the time-tossed origins of the mutant fools Cable and Marvel Girl.

Linear thinking is the downfall of your species.

Factor Three waits for the perfect moment.

I've missed you

[Daithi]

Originally Posted by nikbackm

Not if you compare it with Rachel's, no.

Er? Rachel is the daughter of Cyclops and Jean Grey in an alternate universe. She travels back in time but messes up and arrives in a different timeline.

Compared to what worstblogever just posted? Rachel's origin is actually needed to understand Cable's origin and is still just a small part of it! Madness.

I find Psylocke's transformation into a ninja to be the worst though.

[worstblogever]

Originally Posted by Daithi

Er? Rachel is the daughter of Cyclops and Jean Grey in an alternate universe. She travels back in time but messes up and arrives in a different timeline.

Compared to what worstblogever just posted? Madness.

You left out "Hound training", being pursued by Nimrod & Ahab, and absorbing a fraction of this Earth's Phoenix Force, though.

Still, I give the nod to Cable for being a tad more complicated.