The Classic Quotations Thread

[benday-dot]

From the pages of Amazing Adult Fantasy #7.

The exalted and maniacal cry of one of Lee/Ditko's long forgotten misanthropes, from a long line of the famous tandem's long forgotten misanthropes in Marvel's early years:

Good!! Let the bombs drop! Earth was too crowded anyway! Ha ha ha!

Now that is some adult fantasy from a certain Sydney Blake as he enters his exclusive home made bomb shelter in the midst of early 60's cold war atomic bomb paranoia.

[Aaron Kashtan]

VISION: For many months after meeting [Wanda], I fought against my growing affection for her, still considering myself a soulless machine -- but when I learned the truth -- that I had been created to be exactly like a human -- I saw that I could truly be her man --
GYRICH: Enough! I don't want to hear this sort of thing!
VISION: You misunderstand me, Gyrich!

And so does the reader, probably. From Vision and the Scarlet Witch #1, dialogue by Steve Englehart.

[Aaron Kashtan]

[A] massive column of mystic flame solidifies into a towering figure -- whose features vaguely resemble those of Felix Faust -- but whose manner is anything but that of the reformed thamurtage!

--That is a very, very strange way to spell thaumaturge. From Justice League of America #182, dialogue by a confused Gerry Conway.

[Aaron Kashtan]

SASHIA: Admittance to the citadel is forbidden to all male humans, but females -- the more beautiful, the better -- are welcome.

[...]

STORM: Have you a plan, Cyclops?
CYCLOPS:The bare bones of one, Storm. You and Mrs. Richards will infiltrate the citadel and rescue Arkon and the F.F. Kitty, Colossus and I will be your back-up, in case of trouble.

--I'm surprised that Kitty didn't immediately object and ask why she wasn't beautiful or feminine enough to go with Storm and Sue. From X-Men Annual #5, dialogue by Chris Claremont.

[Aaron Kashtan]

You see, there was an overload at the atomic energy plant just outside Midway... and the only one who could possibly stop it was Dr. Mark Peiken--

-- Shouldn't an atomic energy plant have more than one person on staff who knows how to stop the plant from overloading? Has the Midway City power company never heard of the principle of redundancy? From Detective Comics #467, dialogue by Bob Rozakis.

[Aaron Kashtan]

So have we got news for you! First, the bad news. Dave Cockrum, who was virtually unknown in the field and gained star-artist status only after we gave him the opportunity to do the Legion, has departed.

Now, the good news. Mike Grell, who proved his professionalism via several assignments at DC, will henceforth guide the super-group through its eventful encounters.

--If you know the real story behind why Dave Cockrum quit the title (because DC refused to return the original art for his two-page splash in Superboy #200), then this becomes even more insulting and spiteful than it already is. From the editor's note in Superboy #203, written by someone, presumably Murray Boltinoff, who was too cowardly to sign his name.

[Aaron Kashtan]

Dr. Rogers: Now I'm afraid they intend to kill us [...]
NoMan: Never fear I'll prevent it!

--Because of the lack of a comma after "fear," NoMan's statement means the opposite of what it's supposed to! From T.H.U.N.D.E.R. Agents #4, dialogue by Steve Skeates.

[Aaron Kashtan]

The Wasp is trying to convince the Molecule Man to save the world, rather than just saving himself and his girlfriend and letting the world blow up.

JAN: You aren't really just going to save yourself and let everything else go to pieces, are you?
MOLECULE MAN: The world didn't do a whole heck of a lot for me most of my life!
JAN: But think about it -- ! No more Saks, no more children playing hide and seek, no more sunrises off Cape Cod...

Somehow it seems appropriate that if the world blew up, the thing Jan would miss most would be Saks. From Avengers #266, dialogue by Roger Stern.

[jimmywoo]

"Busy,busy,busy,busy,busy,busy!Busy saying the word 'busy'."

"You know what diet is,don't you? It's DIE with a T.That's what it is."
Said my lovely Garfield.

[Aaron Kashtan]

I could have just shot him, but no! I must lock him in a burning building!

Why?! Why must I have so much style?

--A crime boss laments the failure of his poorly planned (but stylish) attempt to kill Batman. From Batman Adventures #15, dialogue by Kelley Puckett.

[Aaron Kashtan]

In Green Lantern #30, Hal convinces Katma Tui to give up her engagement to Imi Kann, because it conflicts with her duties as a Green Lantern. Subsequently, Hal thinks:

Katma Tui's situation parallels my own on Earth! Does what I told her mean I can never marry Carol Ferris? But Katma is a woman -- and I am a man! Perhaps that will make a difference--!

Dialogue by John Broome, champion of gender equality.

[Aaron Kashtan]

Under the care of the Dalai Lama and his daughter, Templer has recovered...

-- From T.H.U.N.D.E.R. Agents #5, dialogue by an unknown writer, who apparently didn't know that the Dalai Lama is supposed to be celibate.

[Aaron Kashtan]

In Superman #390 (dialogue by Elliot S! Maggin), Clark and Lana are hanging out in Clark's apartment, when...

LANA: What's that noise?
CLARK: It's my, er -- beeper... Perry White's latest angle for keeping tabs on his reporters! May I borrow your phone?

Shockingly, Clark is actually telling the truth... he really does have a beeper, Perry really is calling him, and he is not making up an excuse so he can get away and change to Superman. This is perhaps the only Superman story ever in which Clark gives Lana an excuse for leaving the room, and the excuse turns out to be true!

[Aaron Kashtan]

--A blatantly erroneous footnote from Superboy #222. How did the writer, the editor and the letterer all manage to miss this?

In the same spirit:

Gods of Imsk!

--Said by Phantom Girl, who is from Bgztl, not Imsk, which is where Shrinking Violet is from, in Legion of Super-Heroes #261. This error escaped both writer Gerry Conway and editor Jack C. Harris.

[Aaron Kashtan]

But Carnelian doesn't have any magic powers, so he goes to Earth and other places for weapons! There's hardly any machinery on the Gremworld except for what he's brought back!

-- Apparently they were planning to rename the series Amethyst, Princess of Gremworld. From DC Comics Presents #63, dialogue by Dan Mishkin and Gary Cohn.