The Classic Quotations Thread

[Aaron Kashtan]

You sometimes have to ignore what your friends say and do what's good for them!

--From the Starman story in Adventure Comics #478, dialogue by Paul Levitz. Why is this quote interesting? Because Steve Ditko drew this story, and it seems like he would vehemently disagree with this sentiment.

[Rob Allen]

Joan of Arc: "I don't understand why, with the portal to heaven open and paradise within your grasp, you didn't just step right through!"

Harry Houdini: "What? And give up show biz?!"


- the concluding panels of Daring Escapes #4, script by Tom Orzechowski and Andy Grossberg, art by Alan Weiss and Jim Fern.

[icctrombone]

Issue # 211 V.1

Moondragon has mentally manipulated various heroes to go to the Avengers mansion in order to “audition” for membership . After a short fracas , Jocasta senses that She is behind all of the conflict . When the fighting stops , Hawkeye turns to leave the mansion :

Moondragon : You may go Hawkeye ! I sense that your correct path leads away from the Avengers …for now.

Hawkeye : Baldy , if your so hot why couldn’t you figure that out without dragging me across town ?

[Aaron Kashtan]

MR. BEMIS: Get in here, Bill! I want to talk to you! You punched in seven minutes late. I'm docking you an hour's pay, and it better not happen again... or else!
BILL: Oh, yeah? I've got news for you, Mr. Bemis. I've got a new job offer with a real future... at twice the money!
MR. BEMIS: Hah! Anybody'd be crazy to pay you that much!
BILL: That's what you think! I've been learning electronics in my spare time at home from CIE... and now I can take my pick of good jobs!
MR. BEMIS: You gotta be kidding! You? In electronics?
BILL: Yes! Now I've got a career. CIE made it easy. So good-by to you and your crummy job!

--"The day Bill told off his boss," one of my favorite comic book ads ever, appearing in DC comics around August 1973.

[LUXXXCORP]

*choke* Good Lord!

or is it

Good Lord! *choke*

[Aaron Kashtan]

The conifers are conferring.

--From Abe: Wrong for All the Right Reasons by Glenn Dakin.

[Aaron Kashtan]

(After Nick and his boss Boris get done with work for the day...

BORIS: Nick, you have, eh, somewhere to go now?
NICK: Uh, not really. Why? Do you need me for something?
BORIS: No, no. I go to whorehouse. You come?

--From Tricked by Alex Robinson. The funny part is Boris's completely deadpan expression (oh, and the rest of the page makes it clear that he really is going to a whorehouse).

[Aaron Kashtan]

You're saying you think you passed on your bat-like hearing to [your daughter] Rebecca! Impossible! Acquired characteristics can't be inherited!

--Superman to Kirk Langstrom, from DC Comics Presents #35. This might be the only comic book I've ever read which acknowledges that acquired characteristics cannot be inherited (although Kirk does go on to give a pseudo-scientific explanation of how it could have happened anyway). Most comic book writers just ignore this inconvenient scientific fact.

[Aaron Kashtan]

Call me sentimental, but if my cousin died and my aunt and uncle did not know about it yet, I would not break the news to them by carrying the corpse into the living room.

--T.M. Maple, LOC published in Superman #418.

[adam_warlock_2099]

Dialouge box --

I can't hear her anymore. The "back-up", the mutant guard was asking for ...? ... just showed up. All anybody can hear now is screams. But as the three of us start to float away ... ... I can see her face. I'll remember it for the rest of my life.

-- Generation Next #4

[Aaron Kashtan]

Tu es folle, mademoiselle! Celui homme es... un loup garou -- the werewolf!

--Peut-etre je n'ai jamais vu une pire traitement du langage francais. From Werewolf by Night #16.

[Aaron Kashtan]

JUBALI: When we approach these guards, Cimmerian, you must talk and act like a woman.
CONAN: What? That's no thing I will be good at...

-- He's a barbarian and he's okay, he sleeps all night and he works all day... From Conan the Barbarian #262, dialogue by Roy Thomas.

[Aaron Kashtan]

SPIDER-MAN: I think we can make beautiful music together!
TIGRA: I don't play any instruments!
SPIDER-MAN: Then how about a nice dinner -- followed by some cozy snuggling in a web-hammock made for two?

--Yes, he actually said that (and she declined, obviously). From Marvel Team-Up #125, dialogue by J.M. DeMatteis.

[Aaron Kashtan]

BEN: Wow! Lookit that bozo! Dino deLaurentis could save a fortune, if he just had a Polaroid.
JOHNNY: Never mind the "in"-jokes!

--It's still funny even if you don't know who Dino deLaurentis is! A little fictional self-awareness from Fantastic Four #171, dialogue by Roy Thomas.

[benday-dot]

Superman to cousin SuperGirl:

"If I ever did marry... it would be to some one super and lovable like... you! We can't marry because we're cousins! Though cousins can marry in certain countries here on earth... We're both from the planet Krypton, where the marriage of cousins was unlawful!"

Action Comics #289, June '62

Superman utters this sketchy bit of dialogue with some real longing in his eyes, but I like the way the books writer, the hero's creator Jerry Seigel, puts in that little qualifier clause "though cousins can marry in certain countries here on earth." It's hard to say if this is Superman's way of excusing some inpure thoughts, or if it's a worried DC editorial effort not to alienate any potential young comic book readers who might also happen to be kissin' cousins.

It's like those situations where one goes "I think they might be gay... not that there is anything wrong with that!"

BTW... the Curt Swan cover on this book is gorgeous.