View Poll Results: Who do you want on your side?

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  • Chuck Norris

    10 45.45%
  • Jack Bauer

    12 54.55%
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  1. #31
    Moderator Mister Mets's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Greg Hatcher View Post
    Jack Bauer is clearly more bad-ass. In season 2 of 24-- just to name one example-- he is hanging naked and clinically dead and then recovers enough to take out the guys that were torturing him.

    But that's not the poll question. Do I want him on my side? Hell no. He's screwed up every operation he's ever been on, his agency is riddled with traitors and moles, everyone he's ever been close to has been kidnaped, tortured, menaced by wild animals, and in a couple of memorable cases either mistakenly tortured or accidentally killed by Bauer himself. If Bauer is leading your Special Ops team I'd advise you to get the hell out of the country. Off the entire continent, actually.
    Jack Bauer's problem was that enough people didn't listen to him. If he were in charge, the terrorists would be apprehended by Hour 11, and the rest of the day would be spent on well-earned relaxation.
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  2. #32
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    The question is just so silly. Doesn't the threadstarter know who Chuck Norris is? We are talking about the guy who does push ups not by pushing himself up but by pushing the Earth down, for God,s sake!!!

  3. #33
    Senior Member I'm Not Daredevil's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mister Mets View Post
    Jack Bauer's problem was that enough people didn't listen to him. If he were in charge, the terrorists would be apprehended by Hour 11, and the rest of the day would be spent on well-earned relaxation.
    Haha this is so true.

  4. #34
    Senior Member I'm Not Daredevil's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by timberwolf View Post
    The question is just so silly. Doesn't the threadstarter know who Chuck Norris is? We are talking about the guy who does push ups not by pushing himself up but by pushing the Earth down, for God,s sake!!!
    Yes I know who Chuck Norris is but do YOU know who Jack Bauer is?????

  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by infinitEEntropy View Post
    Yes I know who Chuck Norris is but do YOU know who Jack Bauer is?????
    Yep! Jack Bauer is a Johnny come lately trying hard copycat of Chuck Norris.

  6. #36
    Marquis de carabas's Avatar
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    Chuck Norris exists. Jack Bauer does not.

    I'm not sure if that helps or hinders Bauer's case though.
    'The marquis. Well, you know, to be honest, he seems a little bit dodgy to me.'
    'Mm,' she agreed. 'He's a little bit dodgy in the same way that rats are a little bit covered in fur."

  7. #37
    Idaho Spuds Slam_Bradley's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by carabas View Post
    Chuck Norris exists. Jack Bauer does not.

    I'm not sure if that helps or hinders Bauer's case though.
    It makes Bauer a tad less offensive.

  8. #38
    Senior Member I'm Not Daredevil's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by carabas View Post
    Chuck Norris exists. Jack Bauer does not.

    I'm not sure if that helps or hinders Bauer's case though.
    Jack Bauer does exist, he is watching you right now.

  9. #39
    Elder Member jesse_custer's Avatar
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    Lone Wolf McQuade > 24.

  10. #40
    Princess Murder You bipolar danger girl's Avatar
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    Fuck it. I vote unicorns.
    The unicorn is kind of lonely
    Being unique and oh so corny
    Mounting does not amount to much
    The unicorn is unic-horny.
    ~the4thpip

    Diamonds, Daisies, Snowflakes,
    Bipolar Danger Girl
    Chestnuts, Rainbows, Springtime ...
    Is Bipolar Danger Girl
    She's tinsel on a tree ...
    She's everything that every girl should be!
    Sable, Popcorn, White Wine,
    Bipolar Danger Girl
    Gingham, Bluebirds, Broadway ...
    Is Bipolar Danger Girl
    She's mine alone, but luckily for you ...
    If you find a girl to love,
    Only one girl to love,
    Then she'll be Bipolar Danger Girl too ...
    Bipolar Danger Girl!
    ~fly on the wall

  11. #41
    The Central Sca-rutinizer Pól Rua's Avatar
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    I'd like somebody NICE on my team.
    One of these choices is a fevered Republican revenge fantasy who engages in tired torture porn, and the other one's an out-of-touch far-right homophobic douche who doesn't get that HE's the joke.

    I choose... sandwich!
    "Loudly proclaiming that you are above childish things isn't a sign of maturity - it's proof of adolescence." - Schnitzy Pretzelpants

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  12. #42
    for the lulz 7thangel's Avatar
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    a creation to justify torture vs a bonafide bigoted wingnut

    such a hard choice

  13. #43
    The Central Sca-rutinizer Pól Rua's Avatar
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    Have a sammich. I'm making extras.
    "Loudly proclaiming that you are above childish things isn't a sign of maturity - it's proof of adolescence." - Schnitzy Pretzelpants

    Co-host of The 'Mike & Pól Save The Universe' Comics podcast - check it out on www.mikeandpol.com

  14. #44
    Were You There? Michael P's Avatar
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    What kind of sandwich?
    "If you can't say anything good about someone, sit right here by me." - Alice Roosevelt Longworth, on manners

    "It's not whether you win or lose, it's whether I win or lose." - Peter David, on life

  15. #45
    Idaho Spuds Slam_Bradley's Avatar
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    Sammiches for all.

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