Favorite quotes from the early Batman movies

[Kensei]

Since there was a fun thread on everyones' favorite quotes from the Nolan trilogy, I thought we might share some of our favorites from the Burton and Schumacher films, and what the heck let's throw in the Adam West movie. I'll start things off:

"BATMAN"-

Joker: "This town needs an enema!"

Joker: "Winged freak terrorizes? Wait'll they get a load of me."

Joker (last words before he dies): "Sometimes I just kill myself!"

Alfred: "I have no wish to spend my few remaining years grieving for the loss of old friends... or their sons."

Bruce: "I tried to avoid all this, but I can't. It's not a perfect world."
Vickie: "It doesn't have to be a perfect world. I just gotta know, are we gonna try to love each other?"
Bruce: "I'd like to. But he's out there right now, and I've gotta go to work."

"BATMAN RETURNS"-

Selina: "You don't seem like the type that does business with Mr. Schreck."
Bruce: "You don't seem like the type that takes orders from him."
Selina: "Well, that's a long story."
Bruce: "Yeah? Well, I could free up some time."
Selina: "I'm listed."
Bruce: "I'm tempted."
Selina: "I'm working."
Bruce: (Suddenly realizing elevator doors are closing) "I'm leaving."

Penguin: "The word you're looking for is- AAAAAAAAAHHH!!!"

Clown thug: "Uh, Penguin? I mean, killing sleeping children. Isn't that a little...?"
Penguin: "Rrrrrr." (Shoots and kills thug.) "No! It's a lot!"

Schreck: "Not Chip. Please, if you have an ounce of human feeling, take me instead."
Penguin: "Rrrr. I don't, so no!"

Catwoman: "Two lives left. I think I'll save one for next Christmas. But in the meantime... how 'bout a kiss, Santy Clause?"

Penguin (dying words): "Ack! I picked the cute one. The heat's gettin' to me. I'll murder you momentarily. But first, I need a cool drink... of ice water."

Alfred: "Well, come what may... Merry Christmas, Mr. Wayne."
Bruce: "Merry Christmas, Alfred. Good will toward men. And women."

"BATMAN FOREVER"-

Riddler: "Was that over the top? I can never tell."

[bat39]

Been a while since I've seen them...but here goes-

BATMAN

"I want you to do me a favor...I want you to tell all your friends about me...I'm BATMAN" - Batman

"Jack is dead...you can call me, JOKER. And as you can see...I'm a lot happier!" - Joker

"Batman...Batman...what kind of a world do we live in, where a guy dressed up like a BAT gets all of my press! THIS TOWN NEEDS AN ENEMA!" - Joker

Vicky: "Let's face it...you're not exactly 'normal', are you?
Batman: It's not exactly a 'normal' world, is it?

"I made you...you made me first" - Batman


BATMAN RETURNS

"I am Catwoman...hear me ROAR" - Catwoman

"You're just jealous because I'm a GENUINE freak...and you have to wear a MASK!" - Penguin

Batman - "Poison Ivy can be deadly if you eat it"
Catwoman - "A kiss could be deadlier if you mean it"

"We're the same...we're both split...right down the center" - Batman


BATMAN FOREVER

"It's the car right? Chicks dig the car" - Batman

Dick: You don't understand...your parents weren't killed by a maniac!
Bruce: Yes they were. We're the same.

"So you make the kill...then you go out looking for another face...and another...until one day you wake up and you realize...that revenge has become your life" - Bruce

Batman: A man's got to go his own way. A friend told me that.
Robin: Not just a friend...a PARTNER.

Two Face: See you in HELL!
Robin: I'd rather see you in jail!

"I am both Bruce Wayne and Batman. Not because I have to be. Now...because I CHOOSE to be!" - Batman


BATMAN AND ROBIN

Robin: I want a car! Chicks dig the car!
Batman: That's why Superman works alone.

Batman: Hey Freeze! I'm Batman!

[Jeff Brady]

'66

"Some days, you just can't get rid of a bomb!"

[sunofdarkchild]

'66

"Some days, you just can't get rid of a bomb!"

You beat me to it.

'89 "He stole my balloons! Why didn't somebody tell me he had one of those ...things!"

'92 "You're just jealous because I'm a genuine freak and you have to wear a mask." "You might be right."

'95 Two Face's opening monologue until his coin lets the guard live. If only he didn't immediately degenrate into a farce right after that.

"It will go like this. You make the kill, but your pain doesn't die with Harvey. It grows. So you go out into the night looking for another face...and another...until one day you wake up and you realize that revenge has become your whole life, and you won't know why."

'97 "She knows who we are." "I guess we'll have to kill her." "Yup. We'll kill her later. We've got work to do."

[Kensei]

Michelle Pfeiffer definitely owned "Batman Returns" and had most of the best dialogue. This is from memory:

Schreck: "Selina. Selina, Selina..."
Selina: "That's my name, Maximillian. Don't wear it out or I'll make you buy me a new one."
Schreck: "Did you injure yourself... on that ski slope?"
Selina: "It's... a blur. I mean, not total amnesia. I remember Sister Mary Margaret puking in church and (someone) saying it was morning sickness, and I remember forgetting to wear my underpants to school and the name of the boy who noticed was Ricky Freeburg. He's dead now."

And when it comes to Adam West, apart from his famous line about the bomb, I'll never forget this one:
"Robin, throw me the Bat Shark Repellent!"

[mosdef]

Batman (1989)

The Joker: Where does he get those wonderful toys?

[Whip Whirlwind]

You wanna get nuts!? C'mon, let's get nuts!

[fatalwish]

Batman 89:

"Look, you're a nice girl and I like you a lot, but for right now... shut up."

"Bob, gun."

"Gentlemen! Let's broaden our minds!"

[nightwing1124]

"Have you ever danced with the devil by the pale moonlight?"-joker

Dist. Atty. Harvey Dent: We've received a letter from Batman this morning. 'Please inform the citizens of Gotham that Gotham City has earned a rest from crime. But if the forces of evil should rise again, to cast a shadow on the heart of the city, call me.'
Alexander Knox: Question. How do we call him?
Commissioner Jim Gordon: He gave us a signal.
[Commissioner Gordon activates the Bat Signal]

I remember loving that as a kid.

[Greg Anderson]

Catwoman had the best lines. My favorite:

It's the so called normal guys that always let you down. Sickos never scare me. At least they're committed.


Then you have Bruce's lost and confused look like, "Uh... yeeah." LOL!

Also, when she's about to stop the muggin:

I just love a man who isn't afraid to show it with someone half his size. Be gentle, it's my first time.

Followed by when she saves the woman:

You make it so easy, don't you? Always waiting for some Batman to save you. I'm Catwoman. Here me roar.

[Greg Anderson]

Max Shreck: Ingenious costume, let me guess. Trust-fund goody-goody.
Bruce Wayne: Feeling good, huh? Yeah, well, you almost made a monster of the Mayor of Gotham City.
Max Shreck: I am the light of this city...and I am its mean, twisted soul. Does it matter who's Mayor?
Bruce Wayne: It does to me.
Max Shreck: Yawn.

[Kensei]

Vicky Vale: "What do you want?"
Joker: "My face on the one dollar bill."
Vicky: "You must be joking."
Joker: "Do I look like I'm joking?"
Vicky: "Well..."

Catwoman: "You said you were going to scare the ice princess."
Penguin: "She looked pretty scared to me!"

Also, Selina/Catwoman's shrill freaked out scream. Greatest scream I've ever heard.

[the Sun God]

Each line from Batman & Robin.

[Kensei]

And who can forget, from "Batman Forever"-

Robin: "Holey rusted metal, Batman!"

[Kensei]

More Penguin classics-

"He didn't even lose a limb! An eyeball! Bladder control!"

"Why is there always someone who brings eggs and tomatoes to a speech?!"