RITA'S CXLVI: What's a Sweetheart Like You Doin' in a Dump Like This?

[howyadoin]

I hate when I miss a Cunard visit. Stupid work! Since jessecuster3 and Kees_L are ignoring my musical needs today, I will share this Tragically Hip song with CBR because you are all my Wheat Kings and pretty things. *twirl*

I love that song so much.

Also, remind me someday to tell you the story of the first time I heard the Hip.

[Puma]

Morning people.

Last day of work until January 2nd. Finish up a few loose ends, finish up interviews and select the top three candidates, mail off packages, and then get ready to go south.

[Guapo Méndez]

Good morning!

I swam 1,800 meters today in 10 minutes less than last week. Yay!
I still feel my arms like jelly, but I'm improving, baby!

[Dizzy D]

I'm on an interview panel today and tomorrow, not much free time (right now I am proctoring an exam for a very bright teen so I have play time).

sounds good, what type of sauce?

Mostly soy, a little ketchup and a bit of sambal mixed in.

guess Im doing it wrong...or maybe Im too clinical about it, Ive actually sat down with exes and laid out things I like and I don't like...seems communication that blunt doesn't work for most

I think the charts you brought mapping "distance between your vagina and my cock" vs. "enjoyment level" was a bit too much.*

I exist.

Sadly.

I may exist. I may not. Current evidence points towards existing, but I'm willing to inspect any evidence to the contrary.**


* = I suspect this graph had a parabolic shape.

** = like my inability to attract the attention of cabs, waiters and women.

[bipolar danger girl]

I... I could believe that.

You know, it would explain a lot.

I cannot be believed or explained, only ignored or tolerated.

Congratulations! You are Awesome Rita. I couldn't tell.

Congratulations! I am Awesome Rita! You can't tell, because I don't give a fuck!

I love that song so much.

Also, remind me someday to tell you the story of the first time I heard the Hip.

Oh, I am reminding you right fucking now. Cannot wait to hear this one.


Good morning, CBRians! I think Gary B is on to something here. Obviously I only have "friends" on CBR because of my magical vagina, and it's clear to me now that not encouraging everyone to worship my magical vagina on the alter of Awesome Rita was a mistake. I totally fucking forgot that nerds have zero ability to form friendships with anyone owning a magical vagina, and I now realize all of you sad fuckers have just been patiently waiting around for me to sound my trumpet of love... and I do so now. I will no longer ridicule and emasculate any fucker who discovers my magical vagina! I will no longer encourage you all to go fuck yourselves! I will no longer allow the Gary B's of the world to shame me for not charming an army of masturbation! You may all now give a heavy sigh of relief for finally no longer having to pretend you don't give a shit. You're welcome.

Actually, can I just do all of that tomorrow? I just can't be fucking bothered to do it today.

[Paradox]

bipolar danger girl is uncharitable:

Congratulations! I am Awesome Rita! You can't tell, because I don't give a fuck!

Won't you please? Just one little fuck? FOR THE CHILDREN!!!

[bipolar danger girl]

Current evidence points towards existing, but I'm willing to inspect any evidence to the contrary.**


** = like my inability to attract the attention of cabs, waiters and women.

If this was tomorrow, I would say on to you... you exist because I am magical vagina. But since it's not tomorrow, I will say... hilarious! The answer is unicorn hats.

[bipolar danger girl]

Won't you please? Just one little fuck? FOR THE CHILDREN!!!

If this was tomorrow I would say on to you... Oh, alright. *giggle* Who wants to fuck me for the children?

But since it's today I will say... how the fuck do you think I got children?

[thehod]

If this was tomorrow I would say on to you... Oh, alright. *giggle* Who wants to fuck me for the children?

But since it's today I will say... how the fuck do you think I got children?

I'd hazard a guess at "fucking"

[Paradox]

I figured they were just bonus leftovers as she captured and slew storks with her teeth.

[GozertheGozarian]

I figured they were just bonus leftovers as she captured and slew storks with her teeth.

To the victor go the spoils.

[jessecuster3]

I think this totally fits:

[Guapo Méndez]

Dance fight!

[SUPERECWFAN1]

Dance fight!

Man what a douche move . I can't believe the one dude actually claps for that.

[Royal]

11 Most Disastrous Morning Show Cooking Segments Of 2012

my ribs hurt so bad.