RITA'S CXLVI: What's a Sweetheart Like You Doin' in a Dump Like This?

[StoneGold]

There's nothing like an introductory lesson in a rigorous martial discipline to make you aware of just what shape your body is in.

Well, there is, but that's probably not what you want to hear.


Cuz crossfit will fuck your shit up.

[Jared H.]

Pink dinosaur vagina sounds like a name for a geriatric lesbian punk band.

[DarkBlade]

5 cups of the beef stock are now chilling in the refrigerator, more cups became barley-lentil-vegetable soup that is VERY tasty (made my saving throw vs puns there) and the bones are quietly simmering away on the stove in a fresh pot of water for a more straight up bone stock.

My wife is such a hard worker, she makes me feel guilty for staying home while recuperating from influenza.

I'm pretty sure your coworkers appreciate you staying home, though.

They save the ninjas for the advanced courses.

Which is just as well, as I'm pretty sure a litter of kittens with swords could take me out.

Quoted for clever + cute + probably true. XD Also, because I found it funny.

going to the dentist made me grumpy, snapped at hubby; now watching the very bad "The Shadow"

What? They made a bad "The Shadow" film? I have only seen the awesome one with Alec Baldwin. I love that movie. You should watch that one instead.

... Pain levels are making me punchy, and I have had a little too much sugar. Usually, being punchy makes me have stupid overly long sentences. Apparently, adding sugar gives me lots of short ones. Kind of like Awesome Rita's. Which is always actually Jackie in my head, but then I have to fix it for typing in here.

Cause, well, y'do.

Slam, don't you work for the DA's office or something?

Winslow, I found it was also good practice for working in schools. No, wait, moderating was good practice for K-12. Surprisingly, or not, experience working in a preschool was good experience for being a mod. *headdesk*

[Winslow]

What cross-examination? First a stress test, and now this? What on earth are you up to, Batman?

During the day, I am an expert witness in construction disputes.

Winslow, I found it was also good practice for working in schools. No, wait, moderating was good practice for K-12. Surprisingly, or not, experience working in a preschool was good experience for being a mod. *headdesk*

Heh. It also comes in handy trying to tell a construction company CEO he is wrong ... or being a parent to teens.

[StoneGold]

What? They made a bad "The Shadow" film? I have only seen the awesome one with Alec Baldwin. I love that movie. You should watch that one instead.

Are you sure you aren't mixing that up with Billy Zane's "The Phantom?" Because outside of the opening scene on the bridge, "The Shadow" was pretty bad.

[the4thpip]

So I had an MRT and a laser treatment in one week.

If this does not give me super powers, nothing will.

[the4thpip]

This is rather clever:
Africa for Norway

http://www.africafornorway.no/

[Dizzy D]

I swore in court today. On the record. Didn't mean to, but I was on a role and just kinda came out. Luckily it was just a "hell."

Hell is not even swearing. It's just interpunction.

[Puma]

Morning people.

DB- it is the Baldwin one so we are going to have to agree to disagree. Darn disappointing though, could be a great movie.

Half day at work, I am only going in because our aide wants to make up hours due to the holiday (aides don't get holiday pay, just days off).

[jessecuster3]

Good morning, nerds.

Is it wrong to want Amazon Prime just because they have The West Wing, even though I already pay for Netflix(which doesn't offer it)?

[Paradox]

jessecuster3 has a req-ui-SITE:

I have eaten so much jello I am going to barf. Yet, they will not let me push away from the table.

If they offer you a mint, no matter how wafer-thin, DON'T TAKE IT!

[Gryphon]

A bomb exploded on a bus in Tel Aviv. 10 were wounded.

[the4thpip]

A bomb exploded on a bus in Tel Aviv. 10 were wounded.

News thread, maybe?

[Paradox]

thespianphryne knows the game:

You shouldn't swear at customers. That's bad form.

Of course not. The nastier they get, the more polite you get. That's how you WIN!

Especially in person when you can see their head exploding.

[Paradox]

bipolar danger girl begs a critique:

Just that one time, Paradox! So don't you get any fucking bright ideas!

Well, it's all just so random and scattershot. Needs more focus.

As is it's like...Deadpool (EWWWWWWWWW!).