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  1. #1
    Status Quo Cowards Thanos Classic's Avatar
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    Default You Must Defend The Earth From Alien Invasions Using Martial Arts

    Begging from now you are the only thing that stands in the way of total subserviences to alien masters.
    Of course there is no need to worry yet. The first invasion is three years from today.
    Pick your martial arts. Begin your training.

    If you manage to clear the first invasion attempt, each new one will come every six months. Each time it will be a different more powerful alien race. They can appear on the ground to.

    To be fair, you are given a self-teleporter that lets you go to each location the aliens occupy. Each time you teleport thoug, you need a full 24 hours before you can do so again.

    -----
    What MA do you choose?
    What can you potentially stop?
    What if after you've fended off 5 invasions you had to compete in a MA tournament with other from alternate universe who picked different MA?
    Batman should call Superman or Wonderwoman to put an end to Crime in Gotham Forever. It'd only take about 3 minutes...

  2. #2
    A Thinking Man's Rhino Omegalith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Becoming An Anthropologist View Post
    What MA do you choose?
    Well, you didn't specify real martial arts, so I pick Obsidian Shards of Infinity Style, the most horribly broken martial art in the Exalted Setting.

    So long as I carry a small mirror, I am invincible.
    A Flock of Sheep.
    A Pack of Wolves.
    An Inconvenience of Heroes.

  3. #3
    Anti-Matter Eyes Eternal Torment's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Omegalith View Post
    Well, you didn't specify real martial arts, so I pick Obsidian Shards of Infinity Style, the most horribly broken martial art in the Exalted Setting.

    So long as I carry a small mirror, I am invincible.
    Huh. What can it do?

  4. #4
    Fists of God Chou Blaster's Avatar
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    Hokuto Shin Kei!

    It's either that or Akuma's fighting style. (Because I may be nice,but I hold a lot of Killer Intent!)

  5. #5
    Elder Member Farealmer's Avatar
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    Super Karate
    Yeah I give up. They would need like a bajillion UNs to take it out. And they would all have to work.

  6. #6
    A Thinking Man's Rhino Omegalith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eternal Torment View Post
    Huh. What can it do?
    It grants the following abilities:
    -Cause it to rain shards of glass
    -Cause an opponent to fail their attack and harm themselves instead.
    -Attack an opponent's reflection, doing more harm than if you had struck them directly.
    -Attack an opponent's reflection, shattering their sanity in any way desired. May also be used reflexively on oneself to break mind control attempts.
    -Disappear when struck, and appear unharmed a short distance away, retrieving a dropped sai in the process if applicable.
    -Redirect opponents attacks onto another opponent so completely that it looks as if they intended to attack their ally in the first place.
    -Create a duplicate of a foe, which lasts until killed or dismissed.
    -Trap an opponent inside their own reflection.
    -Create multiple duplicates of yourself that can use any of your abilities except for self duplication.
    -None of your abilities cost any magic to use if you are in the presence of a mirror.
    -Summon five mirrors, each showing a possible conclusion to your current battle. Stepping into one will cause that image to become reality.

    The art can only be performed whilst unarmed or wielding sais, but that's really not much of a limitation all things considered.
    A Flock of Sheep.
    A Pack of Wolves.
    An Inconvenience of Heroes.

  7. #7
    Everyone's favorite host Guy Smiley's Avatar
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    Well, since the OP specifies that we must be able to fight our opponents with what we learn using only 3 years training, that lets out most fictional martial arts. Maybe one of those time-travel arts like Temporal Fugue can get around that, but I'll go with one I've actually seen.

    I'll pick the Buddha's Palm from Kung Fu Hustle. Sing looked at that manual for probably only a few days tops before getting his butt kicked by bullies and giving up on martial arts, and it gave him enough latent conditioning to regenerate from near-death, curbstomp the Beast, and do huge amounts of property damage.

    If that won't work, (perhaps that latent power needed time to build up, for instance) I'm going to have to take the comedy option and defeat the aliens with Sexy Commando style.

  8. #8
    When the two Meet... The MunchKING's Avatar
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    Phaleeze. Mirror style? LAME! You want to stop ANY alein invasion? Disgaea Martial Arts are the way to go. With just a few hours grinding you can be capable of soloing even a direct involvement by GOD (self-proclaimed).

  9. #9
    Everyone's favorite host Guy Smiley's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The MunchKING View Post
    Phaleeze. Mirror style? LAME! You want to stop ANY alein invasion? Disgaea Martial Arts are the way to go. With just a few hours grinding you can be capable of soloing even a direct involvement by GOD (self-proclaimed).
    Yeah, but good luck reaching the level of even a 1st-level netherworlder to begin that training (A level 1 Laharl can destroy an entire space fleet... ) or finding anything worthwhile to grind experience from.

  10. #10
    Fists of God Chou Blaster's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Guy Smiley View Post
    Well, since the OP specifies that we must be able to fight our opponents with what we learn using only 3 years training, that lets out most fictional martial arts. Maybe one of those time-travel arts like Temporal Fugue can get around that, but I'll go with one I've actually seen.

    I'll pick the Buddha's Palm from Kung Fu Hustle. Sing looked at that manual for probably only a few days tops before getting his butt kicked by bullies and giving up on martial arts, and it gave him enough latent conditioning to regenerate from near-death, curbstomp the Beast, and do huge amounts of property damage.

    If that won't work, (perhaps that latent power needed time to build up, for instance) I'm going to have to take the comedy option and defeat the aliens with Sexy Commando style.

    That is not because of Buddha Palm, but because the old man saw kung fu master in Sing. He managed to wind,hit trees,but against a human at his (Child level)level, did nothing.

    So yeah the beating Sing got managed to get the "flow" of power;reaching his status as a natural Genius of Kung Fu.

  11. #11
    A Thinking Man's Rhino Omegalith's Avatar
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    So I looked it up, and Obsidian Shards of Infinity requires the user to be in the presence of a "square yard of reflective material", which need not be continuous, to function.

    Ergo, the tiny mirror I carry is only a distraction. If it's shattered, I dramatically reveal that I have lined my cape with tinfoil!
    A Flock of Sheep.
    A Pack of Wolves.
    An Inconvenience of Heroes.

  12. #12
    Spectacularly Neurotic Sharkerbob's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Becoming An Anthropologist View Post
    Begging from now you are the only thing that stands in the way of total subserviences to alien masters.
    Of course there is no need to worry yet. The first invasion is three years from today.
    Pick your martial arts. Begin your training.

    If you manage to clear the first invasion attempt, each new one will come every six months. Each time it will be a different more powerful alien race. They can appear on the ground to.

    To be fair, you are given a self-teleporter that lets you go to each location the aliens occupy. Each time you teleport thoug, you need a full 24 hours before you can do so again.

    -----
    What MA do you choose?
    Super Karate.

    What can you potentially stop?
    Probably nothing.

    What if after you've fended off 5 invasions you had to compete in a MA tournament with other from alternate universe who picked different MA?
    Ha! Forget it. I'm just going to help the first invasion succeed!
    It's a lie! My pants were off the entire time!

    I've got a new site for RPGs: Total Pantaloonacy

  13. #13
    Everyone's favorite host Guy Smiley's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chou Blaster View Post
    That is not because of Buddha Palm, but because the old man saw kung fu master in Sing. He managed to wind,hit trees,but against a human at his (Child level)level, did nothing.

    So yeah the beating Sing got managed to get the "flow" of power;reaching his status as a natural Genius of Kung Fu.
    Oh yeah, that's right. It's been a while since I saw that movie.

    Since I almost certainly have no untapped potential, I'm not qualified for the Buddha's Palm. Drat.

    ...

    ...

    Sexy Commando it is, then! First order of business is to find a pair of pants capable of storing a flock of pigeons...

  14. #14
    Fists of God Chou Blaster's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Guy Smiley View Post
    Oh yeah, that's right. It's been a while since I saw that movie.

    Since I almost certainly have no untapped potential, I'm not qualified for the Buddha's Palm. Drat.

    ...

    ...

    Sexy Commando it is, then! First order of business is to find a pair of pants capable of storing a flock of pigeons...

    It's alright.

    I doubt I'll survive the training of the two arts I mentioned.

    Of the two I see me like Toki style (More technique, than raw strength.) While Akuma would just murder me for not keeping up.

  15. #15
    Eleventh Reincarnation Siriel's Avatar
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    Ditching you is more likely. Akuma only kills people that he consider at least worth fighting.
    Suffering is a fact of life. You survive if you find a reason to endure it.

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