From:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/emeyesee/
I hate moments like this, because I have so much to say that I don't know what to say.
For those of you that were around for the tumultuous founding of Emeyesee, you will remember that I had a love / hate relationship with Dwayne McDuffie.
The love came from the fact that really, Dwayne McDuffie was the reason Emeyesee existed. He took the first shot at tackling the under representation of people of color in the comic book industry by founding Milestone Media Inc. My letter appeared in “The Company Line” in their third month of publication. I founded Emeyesee after the minorities in comics panel at the Wizardworld convention in Chicago that same year.
And... it blew up in my face.
Those of you reading this already know that Emeyesee has never lived up to its promise. The problem, as I always saw it, was simple: me. While I feel like I have great ideas and a lot of enthusiasm, I'm a very angry person – it's what's held me back my whole life. It's cost me jobs, friends, relationships with family members – no matter how good you are at anything, if you're angry, people don't want to have anything to do with you. That's just a reality of life. My proof? Dwayne McDuffie.
See, Dwayne McDuffie wasn't an angry person. From all accounts, he was very generous with his creativity, a help to everyone he dealt with, and as a result, a success. Dwayne McDuffie got so much further, IMO, that someone in his position would normally get. There are a lot of talented writers. But he was talented and Black, with can make things more difficult. He never worked on X-Men or any of the hot books of the day. And yet, because he was intelligent, and so many people liked him, he was able to found his own Black comic book company. And get it national, mainstream distribution. What have any of the rest of us done?
Dwayne McDuffie did not scare white people. A former mentor of mine told me that the reason Bill Duke never reached his full potential was because of an altercation he had with a white writer on “Good Times.” Fantastic director, but a tall, dark Black man – any hint of anger, and you're scary to white people. Dwayne McDuffie didn't have that problem, and for it he got to make his own cartoon, AND work with the characters he loved as a child. Dwayne McDuffie, a Black man, achieved so much more than any Caucasian at his level. He was a respected professional whose skin color didn't keep him from anything – instead, it gave him an angle to achieve more. Without any hint of anger, his character shone through and made him a success in life, again, something very few of his peers could say.
Something that I can't say at all.
McDuffie and I got into it when he was on Emeyesee – well, we didn't get into it so much as when I made an immature comment about Tony Isabella, he took offense on behalf of his friend, and decided he wanted no part of Emeyesee. No matter how good the idea might have been, McDuffie knew what I didn't: that nothing good could come of this angry forum. And he was right. Ask yourself, when was the last time you posted to this forum? Or even wanted to?
Dwayne McDuffie was a role model I wish I had chosen to follow. I might have gotten to know him better – a good friend of mine is friends with Michael Davis. And from all accounts, McDuffie was more than willing to teach. I wish I'd had the chance to apologize to him. But I guess it's too late.
I didn't know that McDuffie had died on February 21st, 2011, while I myself was in the hospital. Someone might have mentioned it to me, but it didn't register until Arlontus told me about his tribute panel at the San Diego Comicon this year. I didn't fully realize it until now, but the world truly lost a gentle giant. And for me, I lost my chance to learn from the best.
RIP Dwayne McDuffie
-Khan
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/emeyesee/
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