X-Force #71
Destination: Unknown
John Francis Moore and Adam Pollina
X-Force: Tabitha Smith, aka Meltdown. Roberto DaCosta, aka Sunspot. Theresa Rourke, code-named Siryn. Dani Moonstar, once called Mirage. James Proudstar – Warpath.
Somewhere in Ohio, our 5 favourite mutants are experiencing some car troubles. How did they get into this situation? Well, they “told cable to stick it”. Meltdown, who is like 4 feet tall (!?), can’t fix the car so Sunspot offers to fly into the next town and get help. Buzzkill-Siryn says no. Meltdown and Sunspot both complain about her poor attitude, but Dani Moonstar tells them to STFU and listen. And of course they do, making Siryn feel worthless. Just as Warpath offers to run into the next town (with his super-speed), a van pulls up and stops for them. The occupants, who look eerily similar to Shaggy and Velma from Scooby-Doo, are these cool pro-mutant hippies and they take X-Force into the next city.
Minerva, Ohio...
X-Force is told that their car won’t be fixed for another 24 hours, so they should make plans to stay the night. The cute mechanic starts to hit on Dani, but she rejects him… she’s such a bitch to him, it’s great.
As they start wandering the town, Tabby strikes up conversation with Dani.
Tabby: So what did you think of the mechanic back at the station?
Dani: The fat one? He was kind of gross.
Tabby: No, the other one, the cute one that was talking to you?
Dani: Not my type.
Tabby: Hey girlfriend, you’re allowed to flirt
Meanwhile, at the Weller Clinic in Langley, Virginia…
Domino is in a doctor’s office, visiting her friend, Dr. Rebecca Shuyler. Domino wants to know what, the crazy Prime Sentinel witch, Grayaznova did to her (see X-Force 68). The doctor tells her that Grayaznova implanted some sort of device on the base of her skull that emits random electrical bursts. It messes with her nervous system, making her reflexes and reaction times erratic. The device can’t be removed, or else Domino would be paralyzed.
Back in Minerva, at Flo’s Diner…
The team is enjoying a nice meal and we find out that Sunspot hasn’t needed much food lately, because he’s found that the sun can give him sustenance. Also Dani Moonstar is a vegetarian. When the bill arrives, Sunspot tries paying with his credit card, but it is rejected and cut up. Luckily Dani has some money left over from her MLF job. Sunspot’s trust fund has been frozen as his father is being sued. What are they going to do for money???
There’s a page with Deadpool at the, now empty, Xavier institute. Don’t really know or care what’s going on. Read X-Men 78 to find out what’s up.
The Evangeline Motel, Minerva…
Because they can no longer afford multiple rooms, Siryn and Warpath go in to book a single room. The hotel clerk calls Siryn Mrs. Proudstar and she tells him that they are not married. Warpath asks her why she made a point of it and wonders if he should be offended.
“Och, don’t gimme a hard time, James. I didn’t want him t’think we were shackin’ up.”
When they get their room, Warpath calls to the rest of X-Force to come in. Dani Moonstar immediately rushes to the bathroom, removing her top on the way. We see a little bit of side-boob (ooh!) and her panties (aah!). Later, when they are in bed/on the floor, Warpath begins telling the team of his experience in the strange dimension he was in (last few issues). He was in this strange world full of little creatures and the mutant teleporter, Vanisher, was stuck there with him. Tabitha knows about him, as he trained her to be his own little thief (Fallen Angels mini-series). Basically to get the animals to be calm, Warpath had to tell them a story. So he told them an old Apache legend and was able to escape along with Vanisher.
Sledge (the man Warpath had to work for) then told him the adress the last living survivor of Warpath’s tribe, Michael Whitecloud. And on his way to Nebraska, he met up with X-Force. Siryn begins badmouthing that bitch Risque and Warpath is saddened about how easily he was used.
THUMP CRASH FWUDD! Outside…
Warpath, Siryn and Sunspot rush out to see what the trouble is. A young man is being stuffed into the trunk of a car! Our heroes save him and he offers them a job. Turns out, the boy is rich and wants to hire X-Force as personal bodyguards!
NEXT I$$UE: MONEY CHANGES EVERYTHING!
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