Practices that Irk Me #56 - Aisle seat sitters

[Brian Cronin]

Here's my new feature. I tell you something that irks me, and, if you take part in the said practice, you can explain to me why I am wrong, and said practice is okay. Or if you agree, you can commiserate with me!

Today is "People who sit in the aisle seat on trains/buses when there is no one sitting on the window seat."

I get it, people, you'd prefer if no one sat next to you. I concur - it is really annoying when someone sits next to you - but to actually outright DETER it?

That is awfully weak.

-Brian

[ACertainMrDoe]

Sometimes, there is sitting someone on the windows seat and leaving at a station. I wouldn't switch seats then if I was at that time the one sitting on an aisle seat. Then you come in and look at me condescendingly because you think I'm socially retarded. Not nice of you :D

[Karl H]

I completely understand your view Bri. I tend to aisle sit however, particularly on buses because I'm quite big across the shoulders and thus probably wouldn't be number one on fellow passengers' desirable list! However, if the bus is exceptionally busy, I'll do one of two things. Squeeze up or if they're elderly/ pregnant I'll actually give up my seat for them!

For me they are not as bad as school children playing tinny repetitive music via the raspy speakers in their mobile phones!

[Asmith]

Oh absolutely! 'Aisle Sitters' are the worst class of people out there. There's almost always at least one every morning on my bus.

Which is why I usually take justice into my own hands and become a vigilante!
If you see an 'Aisle Sitter' go demand the bit of seat next to them! Squeeeeeze past while being sure to rub your bottom on their face and scrape their knees with your legs. They get the message. Even more so if the rest of the bus is half-empty with completely free seats everywhere else!

So next time you see an 'Aisle Sitter' just ask yourself "what would Batman do in this situation?" - and once you've decided not to dress-up in your girlfriends tights to hang-out with young boys, deliver some good ol' fashion commuter justice!

I did once have an 'Aisle Sitter' try to explain to me why she was sitting on the outer edge of the seat, after I'd delivered my blow for transit seat egalitarianism. She explained that she was getting off the bus in a few stops and didn't want to crawl over anyone. But since the only people who open up dialogue with strangers on a bus are always crazy people, I don't know how valid this explanation is in explaining other 'Aisle Sitters' - she was probably lying.

Strangely enough, 'Aisle Sitters' tend to always be women. I put this down to either Princess Complexes or some kind of rape-fear manifestation...

But men seem to have the monopoly on sitting in a two-person seat with the legs spread extra-manly wide, so they take up most of the other half. In that situation I just like to slide in on next to 'em, then start firm, but in a friendly way, pushing back with my own leg onto their own till they put both their knees together like respectable christian folk. So as not to start any agression, it's best to keep looking right at them with a big smile as you do this leg rub/push. Works everytime!

[Ryan Day]

I generally agree. I mean, it's fine when the bus or train isn't busy, but in rush hour? The same goes for people who put their bags on the seat next to them - if it's really busy, don't be a jerk.

An extension of this complaint is people who don't move to the back of the bus. Some people just seem to walk halfway down and then stop there. And then other people do the same thing because, I dunno, they don't want to infringe on the personal space of the person in front of them or something. So you end up with this massive crush of people in the front half of the bus, and if you can somehow make it through all of them you can often find empty seats at the back.

It's so stupid, annoying, and inconsiderate.

[Greg Hatcher]

I have a limp and walk with a cane. Aisle seating works better for me. It's not some sort of STATEMENT, other than "I think it will piss people off less if I sit where I can rise and de-bark from the bus easily."

I use the handicapped seating in the front when I can, where it's a non-issue, but I always defer to people in wheelchairs there. Which sometimes leaves me with an aisle seat.

Now I know my fellow passengers are secretly seething with resentment over it. Thanks a lot, Cronin, you bastard.

[Ryan Day]

See, I think if you've got a cane or something (at least one that's not an obvious pimp accessory), you get a bit of a free pass.

[Merey]

So next time you see an 'Aisle Sitter' just ask yourself "what would Batman do in this situation?"

HA! Now this mantra is going to pop in my head when I encounter infuriating public transit situations.

Strangely enough, 'Aisle Sitters' tend to always be women. I put this down to either Princess Complexes or some kind of rape-fear manifestation...

See, you kind of lost me here. Admittedly, my commute is by subway train (where the seating isn't in traditional rows) and not rail commuter train -I only travel by commuter train a few times a month, but most aisle sitters I see are men. And I just assume it's because the taller/bigger men want that slight more room to stretch. In the case of women, "Princess complex"or "rape-fear" seems both a bit severe and over analytical for something that I think probably just boils down to laziness. But, YMMV. Maybe it's a cultural thing.

But men seem to have the monopoly on sitting in a two-person seat with the legs spread extra-manly wide, so they take up most of the other half. In that situation I just like to slide in on next to 'em, then start firm, but in a friendly way, pushing back with my own leg onto their own till they put both their knees together like respectable christian folk. So as not to start any agression, it's best to keep looking right at them with a big smile as you do this leg rub/push. Works everytime!

But here you got me back again. I HATE the two seat taking wide spreading knees I see EVERY DAMN DAY on the subway. Guys, do you really need to give your crotch that much breathing room?! Close your legs a bit and stay to your own seat, dammit!

[FanboyStranger]

Here's my new feature. I tell you something that irks me, and, if you take part in the said practice, you can explain to me why I am wrong, and said practice is okay. Or if you agree, you can commiserate with me!

Today is "People who sit in the aisle seat on trains/buses when there is no one sitting on the window seat."

I get it, people, you'd prefer if no one sat next to you. I concur - it is really annoying when someone sits next to you - but to actually outright DETER it?

That is awfully weak.

-Brian

I do this on planes for the simple reason that I'll have a clearer shot of getting off faster. I'm also pretty tall with very long legs, so sometimes it helps to let my legs sprawl out into the aisle if it's not a hazard to other people. I tend to get leg cramps when sitting in a small space.

The thing is, I will always move over if someone asks, especially if the train is crowded. The absolute worst is people who reserve a spot for their briefcase or purse-- I'm not talking about luggage, which I have a bit more sympathy for-- and get snooty when you try to sit down.

[Brian Cronin]

Rhyming exceptions!

Planes are okay. Definitely a different situation than buses and trains.

Canes are okay. No one is going to give a dude with a cane crap about wanting to sit near the aisle.

-Brian

[Ryan Day]

How you go about it is key: If you need/prefer to sit on an aisle seat, make sure you're willing to move if someone looks like they want to sit down.

But if you just sit there looking like you're conciously trying to block people from sitting down, you're a jerk.

[Brian Cronin]

How you go about it is key: If you need/prefer to sit on an aisle seat, make sure you're willing to move if someone looks like they want to sit down.

But if you just sit there looking like you're conciously trying to block people from sitting down, you're a jerk.

Yeah, there are definitely levels of lameness - if you look willing to move, that's cool, but really, if a bunch of people come on, you can totally tell that people WILL want to sit, so move over!

-Brian

[BizarroBeachHead]

HA! Now this mantra is going to pop in my head when I encounter infuriating public transit situations.

WWBD

This'll help you remember.

(scroll down near the bottom)

[Stony]

I have a limp and walk with a cane.

I have to ask....

A sword-cane?

If not, why not?

[Greg Hatcher]

I have to ask....

A sword-cane?

If not, why not?

I wish. No, it's an aluminum old-guy cane. I had a dark wood one that was pretty stylin', but you know the trouble with them? It hurts your hand and elbow to use them when you put your weight on it all day. It's essentially making your arm and upper body do the work of the bad leg, remember. And the wooden one wasn't the right one for the job.

So now I have the medically-recommended aluminum kind with the foam handgrip. I look a lot nerdier but I'm in less pain, and since the whole point of carrying the thing is to walk without being in pain, I decided I'd make the trade-off. Frankly, my bespectacled overweight self is never going to look cool again anyway and I might as well own up. Even when I was younger my best day still looked like Rupert Giles on Buffy.