Dear Mr. Olney,
My name is Raymond Burr, and I am James Ritchey, III's Imaginary Attorney, having died September 12, 1993, not withstanding. Yes, I am a phantom. Through some bizarre twist of fate, in the afterlife I was granted the powers of the fictional character I portrayed for many years, Perry Mason--whose ability it was to so badger witnesses, to the point where they would spontaneously confess their wrongdoing in open court. This sometimes happened randomly in the gallery. Please warn your fictitious Attorney of this skill, and pass on my sentiment that he cannot possibly win if he even hints at thinking about threatening my client ever again, since you are a guilty, guilty man, and will be the defendant. I took on Godzilla--does he really want to go toe to toe with me?
Signed (by Proxy),
Raymond William Stacey Burr,
Homosexual Ghost Imaginary Attorney with
Magical Confession-Inducement Powers