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Thread: Dear Mad Hatter

  1. #1
    Elder Member Gail Simone's Avatar
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    Default Dear Mad Hatter

    I've taken the liberty of asking the Mad Hatter to solve all your life's problems, and he's kindly agreed, even with a painful knife wound in his back.

    State your problem, and the Hatter shall help.

    Gail

  2. #2
    Bwaaah Weetomuncher's Avatar
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    Should I get a 360, a Wii or something else entirely, oh Hatter?
    Hmm...

  3. #3

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    I work graveyard shifts,so i sleep all day and work all night,with two days that are not very stable in scheduling off. Will i ever find true love,Mr. Hatter?

  4. #4

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    I wanted mints from the vending machine. I misread and got a sidekick candy bar instead. :(

  5. #5
    Elder Member Gail Simone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Weetomuncher
    Should I get a 360, a Wii or something else entirely, oh Hatter?

    Calloo callay! It would seem to me that, although the 360 has superior graphics, the delightful echoing of the Nintendo system's name, with the first syllable of your own, makes this decision a snap of the hatbrim!

    Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!

    Stop looking at my hat. AWAY with you!

    H.

  6. #6
    Elder Member Gail Simone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Night Swordsman
    I work graveyard shifts,so i sleep all day and work all night,with two days that are not very stable in scheduling off. Will i ever find true love,Mr. Hatter?
    It depends on whether or not you wear a hat, dear boy. If not, then no, you won't find true love. If yes, then who cares? You have a HAT!

    M.H.

  7. #7
    Elder Member Gail Simone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MartinRedmond
    I wanted mints from the vending machine. I misread and got a sidekick candy bar instead. :(
    Hmm.

    Only one thing for it, research the company that makes the vending machine, learn the home address of its president, and kill him in an astounding hat crime.

    That's what I'd do!

    H.

  8. #8
    Junior Member MrSuslov's Avatar
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    Question

    Dear Mad Hatter:

    -How can you ever trust that villainous harlot who stabbed you in the back?

    -How do you keep your hats from fading? My Red Sox hat from 2004 is by now heavily faded from blue to the approximate color of old blue jeans.

    Regards,
    Suslov

  9. #9
    Heavy Metal War Machine PatrickG's Avatar
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    Mr. Tetch,

    I'll give you ten shillings and six pence for your hat. That's the price, right?

    Also, I was wondering if you could clear up the business with that other Mad Hatter who claimed to be you. You claimed to kill him but then he showed up a few years later, no worse for wear.

    I think you should forgive him. After all, he likes hats. You like hats. There are more hats in the world than one person can wear.

  10. #10
    Elder Member Lester C.'s Avatar
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    Is it true the Mark Foley is your favorite politician of all time?

  11. #11

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gail Simone
    Hmm.

    Only one thing for it, research the company that makes the vending machine, learn the home address of its president, and kill him in an astounding hat crime.

    That's what I'd do!

    H.
    Wouldn't it be less expensive to buy mints instead?

  12. #12
    Heavy Metal War Machine PatrickG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MartinRedmond
    Wouldn't it be less expensive to buy mints instead?
    And y'know, less likely to shut down the company that makes the mints? It could backfire horribly if they stopped making the mints.

  13. #13
    Just do it. TomStillwell's Avatar
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    Can God make a hat so big even He can't wear it?
    Order Toy Boy: What Happens In Vegas now!
    http://www.toyboyonline.com

    "A nice melding of classic Marvel energy with a contemporary feel. Well-done!" -Mark Waid

  14. #14
    Heavy Metal War Machine PatrickG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TomStillwell
    Can God make a hat so big even He can't wear it?
    I have the feeling that if he did, Jervis would be next in line to try it on.

    And y'know... Diagrams of the space-time continuum I've seen look kindof hat-like now that you mention it.

  15. #15
    Were You There? Michael P's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lester Carthan
    Is it true the Mark Foley is your favorite politician of all time?
    I can answer this: Of course not! He never wore a hat!
    "If you can't say anything good about someone, sit right here by me." - Alice Roosevelt Longworth, on manners

    "It's not whether you win or lose, it's whether I win or lose." - Peter David, on life

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