Everything I needed to know about crime...

[Ta2grrl]

I learned from watching "Law and Order"...and applied it to real life...

Here's a list of things the various "Law and Order's" have tought me...although this could apply to anything, like CSI...

1. If you're a teenager ditching school you will stumble across a dead body.

2. If you're walking away during a fight with your spouse, you will stumble across a dead body.

3. Never take a job as a trash collector or park cleaner- nothing but dead bodies.

4. Police are always having to interview men on parole who work at the fish market.

5. Detectives are always having to "go get me some evidence."

6. Rich white dudes commit a majority of crimes.

7. A woman who has given birth will always recognize the human placenta being carried in the mouth of a dog running down the street.

8. The 2-7 [27th precinct] encompasses all of Manhattan. If you commit a crime anywhere in Manhattan you can be sure it will be investigated by a detective from the 2-7.

9. Whenever you go to the ME's office or the ballistics lab, the exact same doctor or technician will inverably be on call.

10. The internet is strange and scary, and the only people who use it are pedophiles or stalkers. It is impossible to understand if you are over 30.

11. Hudson University has a higher mortality rate than Sub-Saharan Africa, Riker's Island and heroin combined. Its liability insurance is higher than the GDP of most countries.

12. In New York, ADAs are young, female, and look like models. Sometimes they are black men, but that's an exception.

13. TV stars from the 80s and 90s, if they can't find work once their show is cancelled, move to NYC and commit sex crimes.

What has Law and Order taught you....??

XXX

[Michael P]

1. If you're a teenager ditching school you will stumble across a dead body.

I ditched school (well, one class) one day because I'd skipped breakfast. Only thing I stumbled over was my own damn feet getting out of bed.

8. The 2-7 [27th precinct] encompasses all of Manhattan. If you commit a crime anywhere in Manhattan you can be sure it will be investigated by a detective from the 2-7.

Hell, I've seen those bastards investigate crimes in the Bronx.

13. TV stars from the 80s and 90s, if they can't find work once their show is cancelled, move to NYC and commit sex crimes.

So I should be worried that Cody from Step by Step has moved into my building?

[blackdragon6]

apparently every black suspect plays the race card :rolleyes:

[Ta2grrl]

So I should be worried that Cody from Step by Step has moved into my building?

Ha...

:D

I guess that depends on whether or not he comes home with small bags of childrens clothes...or leaves his home with them...!!

XXX

[StoneGold]

So I should be worried that Cody from Step by Step has moved into my building?

Given his penchant for beating the crap out of his wives, you might.

[blackdragon6]

Given his penchant for beating the crap out of his wives, you might.

i thought that was found out to be bullshit?

[Ta2grrl]

i thought that was found out to be bullshit?

Does that qualify as an urban myth and if so...can I call it for the Urban Myths Avatar thread...??

;)

XXX

[Michael P]

apparently every black suspect plays the race card :rolleyes:

That reminds me: All defense lawyers are glory hounds and will invariably pull a ridiculous defense out of their ass in order to turn the trial into a media circus.

Also, detectives making wisecracks over the still-fresh corpse of the deceased is considered appropriate and professional behavior.

[JDogindy]

What has "Law and Order" taught me?

1. A person who is going to die anyway shouldn't be sentenced if he/she murders someone.

2. Bodies will be removed in unorthodox fashions.

3. (this is actually more of CSI) High tech close-ups of the victim and gory remakes of the crime make it more understanding.

[blackdragon6]

That reminds me: All defense lawyers are glory hounds and will invariably pull a ridiculous defense out of their ass in order to turn the trial into a media circus.

Also, detectives making wisecracks over the still-fresh corpse of the deceased is considered appropriate and professional behavior.

not only that but the DA's some how pull a plot devise out of their ass to get a conviction.their like the superman of the court system.

[Boldido]

1. All defense attorneys begin negotiations with the DA on behalf of their client by being snotty and rude.

2. All defense attorneys carry lots of motions to dismiss on their persons at all times.

3. If you are the no name actor, less important co-defendant you will agree to give a full confession after only consulting your attorney for approximately one and one half seconds once you learn that the death penalty is off the table and you will be spending the rest of your life in prison.

[Shellhead]

This thread is an amazing coincidence. Last night and today, I have been helping someone write a paper contrasting Law & Order with the reality of working in a prosecutor's office. Specifically, I watched a couple of episodes from a dvd set last night, and then went to www.tv.com to search for useful quotes from various episodes.

[Ta2grrl]

This thread is an amazing coincidence. Last night and today, I have been helping someone write a paper contrasting Law & Order with the reality of working in a prosecutor's office. Specifically, I watched a couple of episodes from a dvd set last night, and then went to www.tv.com to search for useful quotes from various episodes.

So how does it compare so far...

Are we correct in our misconceptions...thereby making them conceptions...??

XXX

[Shellhead]

So how does it compare so far...

Are we correct in our misconceptions...thereby making them conceptions...??

XXX

No, this is good stuff, funny but on target. Another one I found... it's probably abnormal for the judge to exchange insults with the defendant while determining bail.

[Tish-the-Scorpion]

it's probably abnormal for the judge to exchange insults with the defendant while determining bail.

yeah all of the above that was mentioned in this thread is the reason why i don't watch this show.


i do have a recomendation though,i suggest you all watch american justice.theres no one sidedness,no politics its just as is stories of the american justice system.though it does have its flaws though,every episode seems to be about some guy who murdered his wife/girlfriend :rolleyes: