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Boldido
12-27-2005, 03:58 PM
My mother sent me this and normally, I don't like these things, but this one seems to echo a lot of the things I've been feeling this holiday season.

Subject: A letter from Jesus Christ



Dear child,

It has come to my attention that many
of you are upset that folks are taking My name out of the season. Maybe
you've forgotten that I wasn't actually born during this time of the
year and that it was some of you're predecessors who decided to
celebrate My birthday on what was actually a time of pagan festival.
Although I do appreciate being remembered anytime.

How I personally feel about this
celebration can probably be most easily understood by those of you who
have been blessed with children of your own. I don't care what you
call the day. If you want to celebrate My birth just, GET ALONG AND LOVE
ONE ANOTHER. Now, having said that let Me go on.

If it bothers you that the town in
which you live doesn't allow a scene depicting My birth, then just get
rid of a couple of Santas and snowmen and put in a small Nativity scene
on your own front lawn. If all My followers did that there wouldn't be
any need for such a scene on the town square because there would
be many of them all around town.

Stop worrying about the fact that
people are calling the tree a ??oholiday tree??? instead of
a Christmas tree. It was I who made all trees. You can and may
remember Me anytime you see any tree. Decorate a grape vine if you wish.
I actually spoke of that one in a teaching explaining who I am in
relation to you and what each of our tasks were. If you have
forgotten that one, look up John 15: 1 - 8.

If you want to give Me a present in
remembrance of My birth here is my wish list. Choose something from it.

1. Instead of writing
protest letters objecting to the way My birthday is being celebrated,
write letters of love and hope to soldiers away from home. They are
terribly afraid and lonely this time of year. I know. They tell Me
all the time.
2. Visit someone in a
nursing home. You don't have to know them personally. They just need to
know that someone cares about them.
3. Instead of writing
George complaining about the wording on the cards his staff sent out
this year, why don't you write and tell him that you'll be praying for
him and his family this year. Then follow up It will be nice hearing
from you again.
4. Instead of giving
your children a lot of gifts you can't afford and they don't need,
spend time with them. Tell them the story of My birth, and why I came to
live with you down here. Hold them in your arms and remind them that I
love them.
5. Pick someone
that??Ts hurt you in the past and forgive him or her.
6. Did you know that
someone in your town will attempt to take their own life this season
because they feel so alone and hopeless? Since you don't know who
that person is, try giving everyone you meet a warm smile It could
make the difference. Also, you might consider supporting the local
Hot-Line. They talk with people like that every day.
7. Instead of nit
picking about what the retailer in your town calls the holiday, be
patient with the people who work there. Give them a warm smile and a
kind word. Even if they aren't allowed to wish you a "Merry
Christmas" that doesn't keep you from wishing them one. Then stop
shopping there on Sunday. If the store didn't make so much money on that
day, they'd close and let their employees spend the day at home with
their families.
8. If you really want to make a difference,
support a missionary, especially one who takes My love and Good News
to those who have never heard My name. You may already know someone like
that.
9. Here's a good one. There are
individuals and whole families in your town who not only will have no
"Christmas" tree, but neither will they have any presents to give or
receive. If you don't know them (and I suspect you don't) buy some
food and a few gifts and give them to the Marines, the Salvation
Army or some other charity which believes in Me. They will make the
delivery for you.
10 Finally if you want
to make a statement about your belief in and loyalty to Me, then behave
like a Christian. Don't do things in secret that you wouldn't do in My
presence. Let people know by your actions that you are one of mine.
P.S Don't forget; I am God and can take
care of Myself. Just love Me and do what I have told you to do. I'll
take care of all the rest. Check out the list above and get to
work. Time is short. I'll help you, but the ball is now in your
court. And do have a most blessed Christmas with all those whom you
love. And remember,

I LOVE YOU,

JESUS


____________________________

I have noticed way too much, "Hey, they aren't recognizing our holiday the way I think they should. KILL THEM!!!!", this season. This letter summed up my feelings pretty well.

Nate C.
12-27-2005, 04:04 PM
Roger,

That's about right. :)

Nate

StoneGold
12-27-2005, 04:06 PM
Like Jesus knows how to use the Internet. This is obviously the devil trying to lull us into a false sense of security.

Matt Algren
12-27-2005, 05:12 PM
Five minutes with Google and I can do that too (http://www.holytrinitynewrochelle.org/yourti93647.html).

Beloved;

Well, as you know, it's time for my birthday again. Last year they had a real big party for me and it seems like they will again this year. After all, they've been shopping and preparing for it for months now, and there have been announcements and advertisements almost everyday about how soon it's coming! They really do go overboard about it, but it's nice to know that at least on one day of the year some people are thinking about me a little.

You know, it's been many years now since they first started celebrating my birthday. Back then they seemed to realize and appreciate how much fun it is for the little children. Just the same, it seems that most folks are missing the point of it all. Like last year, for example. When my birthday came around they threw a big party but can you believe it, I wasn't invited!

Imagine! The guest of honor, and they forgot all about me! Here they had begun preparing for the festivities two months in advance but when the big day came I was left out in the cold!

Well, it happened so many times in recent years I wasn't even surprised. Even though I wasn't invited I thought I'd just quietly slip in anyway. So I came in and stood off to the side. Everyone was drinking, laughing and having a grand time, when all of the sudden, in came this fellow in a bright red suit wearing a phony white beard and shouting "Ho Ho Ho!" Everyone cheered, all the children came running over to him, excitedly yelling Santa!" You would have thought that he was the guest of honor and the whole holiday was in his honor! Then he began telling them the most ridiculous stories you've ever heard ... Finally I had to leave, walked out of the door, but no one even noticed that I had gone.

I'm planning of holding my own party! How about that? It's going to be the biggest, most fantastic feast, you could possibly imagine! I'm not saying the date yet, but I'm sending out invitations now anyway because I know you'll want to come. There's going to be room for everyone who wants to come! I'll reserve you a seat of honor (Matthew 8:11)

So hold on to your hat because when everything is ready I'm going to spring it as a big surprise and a lot of people are going to be left out in the cold because they didn't answer my invitation! Let me know right away if you'd like to come and I'll reserve you a place and write your name in large golden letters in my BIG GUEST BOOK!!

Much Love,
JESUS

Matt Algren
12-27-2005, 05:34 PM
On the other hand, I REALLY don't like it when people put words in God's mouth.

I'm not saying that's what you're doing, Boldido. All I'm saying is that both sides think they have God on their side, and they each like to scold the other with "God's" definitive "words" on the issue. And both come at it with a skewed agenda in mind.

Let's take the first letter. Does a good job of changing the subject to try to shame the opposition into submission. Several times, its author assumes that the opposition doesn't do what he/she is suggesting. Faulty logic there. And when it's not changing the subject, its author is claiming to know how Jesus "personally" feels about the issue. (Everybody back away before the lightning hits...)

And in the interest of equal time, the second letter isn't any better. It starts out with Jesus acting like a little kid because he's getting a birthday party. Second, it has its own faulty logic by assuming that people can't celebrate both new Christmas and Christmas Classic. That's just silly. While I'm on the subject of silly, why oh why did they have Jesus sign off with "much love?!?" "Much Love?!?!?" Talk about total loss of street cred.

(I posted a trimmed down version of the letter, by the way. The full version is available here (http://jmm.aaa.net.au/articles/2605.htm). It makes some of the same points as the first letter, interestingly enough. My favorite part, though, is when Santa turns out to be drunk. Because, you know, he obviously would be.)

Sanagi
12-27-2005, 05:36 PM
I like this message a lot, except...
Maybe you've forgotten that I wasn't actually born during this time of the year and that it was some of you're predecessors who decided to
celebrate My birthday on what was actually a time of pagan festival.
No true messiah would confuse "you're" for "your."

Devon C.
12-27-2005, 05:40 PM
Like Jesus knows how to use the Internet. This is obviously the devil trying to lull us into a false sense of security.
Guess you never heard the one about Jesus, Satan and the computer contest.

dougputhoff
12-27-2005, 07:47 PM
We should stop writing letters claiming to be from Jesus and start reading His Word.

Alex
12-27-2005, 08:24 PM
I like this message a lot, except...

No true messiah would confuse "you're" for "your."
Well,he didn't grow up speaking English...

Sir Tim Drake
12-27-2005, 08:43 PM
It's kind of implausible that Jesus would complain so much about not being invited to a birthday party, when he hardly complained at all about being crucified...

Alex
12-27-2005, 08:44 PM
It's kind of implausible that Jesus would complain so much about not being invited to a birthday party, when he hardly complained at all about being crucified...
But this was post crucifixtion.
Wouldn't you be pissed if you were tortured and killed so you can wash away humanities sins, and they didn't even invite you to a party?

Spike-X
12-27-2005, 11:47 PM
Well,he didn't grow up speaking English...
Are you suggesting that our Lord and Saviour was some kind of...foreigner?

Boldido
12-30-2005, 05:11 AM
We should stop writing letters claiming to be from Jesus and start reading His Word.

I'd be happier if people started following that word, especially those that actually profess to believe it.

Boldido
12-30-2005, 05:18 AM
On the other hand, I REALLY don't like it when people put words in God's mouth.

I'm not saying that's what you're doing, Boldido. All I'm saying is that both sides think they have God on their side, and they each like to scold the other with "God's" definitive "words" on the issue. And both come at it with a skewed agenda in mind.

Let's take the first letter. Does a good job of changing the subject to try to shame the opposition into submission. Several times, its author assumes that the opposition doesn't do what he/she is suggesting. Faulty logic there. And when it's not changing the subject, its author is claiming to know how Jesus "personally" feels about the issue. (Everybody back away before the lightning hits...)

And in the interest of equal time, the second letter isn't any better. It starts out with Jesus acting like a little kid because he's getting a birthday party. Second, it has its own faulty logic by assuming that people can't celebrate both new Christmas and Christmas Classic. That's just silly. While I'm on the subject of silly, why oh why did they have Jesus sign off with "much love?!?" "Much Love?!?!?" Talk about total loss of street cred.

(I posted a trimmed down version of the letter, by the way. The full version is available here (http://jmm.aaa.net.au/articles/2605.htm). It makes some of the same points as the first letter, interestingly enough. My favorite part, though, is when Santa turns out to be drunk. Because, you know, he obviously would be.)

I read the second letter in its entirety and I have to say...

Jesus is a whiny bitch.

Typo Lad
12-30-2005, 05:31 AM
Remind me again, people who take G-d's name in vain go in the baptimal fonts full of poop, right?

Donald M.
12-30-2005, 05:59 AM
Remind me again, people who take G-d's name in vain go in the baptimal fonts full of poop, right?

Nah, I'm pretty sure they're forced to gargle with extra strength Listerine for all eternity while being whipped with wet spaghetti.

Seriously, Dante came up with some pretty random shit. The punishments for the first couple circles fit the sins, then after that he's just throwing out crazy crap. And why in the ninth circle is Satan munching on Cassius and Brutus along with Judas? Why no other great betrayers? Is Dante equating Julius Caesar with Jesus Christ, because other that the initials I really don't see the connection.

Okay, I'll stop now.

Naldo
12-30-2005, 06:38 AM
It's odd, when I lived in California there was a nursing home about 1 mile away from my house. Every week I'd take one of my dogs for a walk and we'd visit with the oldsters sitting out on the front veranda/lawn. Every one of them loved it, the dogs enjoyed it and I walked away feeling good about helping give these people a few nice moments in their day.

Someone I met through my old work found out I was an atheist and asked me why I would do something like that. As if atheists aren't nice people by definition. I celebrate Christmas, have a tree (in fact 3) give prezzies and put on music.

Just because I don't believe in deities doesn't mean I don't enjoy extra time spent being kind to people.

I'm also a Republican.

Super Hero Guy
12-31-2005, 09:54 AM
I think rather then trying to be extra nice on one day we should try to be that good all year long.

Phrozen
12-31-2005, 10:03 AM
Nah, I'm pretty sure they're forced to gargle with extra strength Listerine for all eternity while being whipped with wet spaghetti.

Seriously, Dante came up with some pretty random shit. The punishments for the first couple circles fit the sins, then after that he's just throwing out crazy crap. And why in the ninth circle is Satan munching on Cassius and Brutus along with Judas? Why no other great betrayers? Is Dante equating Julius Caesar with Jesus Christ, because other that the initials I really don't see the connection.

Okay, I'll stop now.

No, the entire ninth circle is for traitors. Dante, who was being guided through Hell by Virgil, saw those three as the greatest traitors ever. Being stuck in ice is an approiate punishment for traitors that have made their heart cold to who they betrayed. (In Dante's case the traitors were divided into those who betrayed their family, humanity, and God)

Rabid Trekkie
12-31-2005, 12:49 PM
It's odd, when I lived in California there was a nursing home about 1 mile away from my house. Every week I'd take one of my dogs for a walk and we'd visit with the oldsters sitting out on the front veranda/lawn. Every one of them loved it, the dogs enjoyed it and I walked away feeling good about helping give these people a few nice moments in their day.

Someone I met through my old work found out I was an atheist and asked me why I would do something like that. As if atheists aren't nice people by definition. I celebrate Christmas, have a tree (in fact 3) give prezzies and put on music.

Just because I don't believe in deities doesn't mean I don't enjoy extra time spent being kind to people.

I'm also a Republican.

Yeah, some christians get this idea in their head that no one outside of their religion can be a good person.

Spike-X
12-31-2005, 03:40 PM
Yeah, some christians get this idea in their head that no one outside of their religion can be a good person.
Moreover, a number of them seem to think that simply professing their belief loudly and stridently at every opportunity makes them a better person, and that putting their beliefs into daily practice is unnecessary.

west3man
12-31-2005, 04:08 PM
Yeah, some christians get this idea in their head that no one outside of their religion can be a good person.
Some Christians believe "good" and "bad" are only defined by God's word, so those who don't follow His word don't fit the REAL definition of "good."

That was mind-blowing when I first heard that (from a Christian), but I think a lot of people see it that way.