Worst Song Ever

[TomGun13]

Personally I think 2 of the worst songs I have ever heard in my life are on the radio in heavy rotation right now.

They are:

Nickelback-Photograph: Terrible lyrics, bad melody.

Black Eyed Peas-My Humps: Brutal. And to think that "Where's the Love", had somewhat of a social message. "My lovely lady lumps????" What the H is that all about....

Anyone else got any...

[Dennis K]

Man, even with post #2 I'm too slow to mention how awful My Humps is. There's a country song out now called Honky Tonk Bodonkadonk that is even dumber than Achey Break Heart. Can't recall who does it though.

[TomGun13]

Man, even with post #2 I'm too slow to mention how awful My Humps is. There's a country song out now called Honky Tonk Bodonkadonk that is even dumber than Achey Break Heart. Can't recall who does it though.

Amen, Brother!

[Adam Crocker]

For sheer wretched, ear-bleeding, sanity-breaking Lovecraftian evil NOTHING compares to Starship's "We Built This City." It's arrangements are crassly commercial, yet utterly uncatchy, and thus devoid of any appealing elements. The vocals are more authentically robotic than any Kraftwerk song. The lyrics are filled with awkward rhymes and just plain bad phrases. Moreover, the denounce the corporate dollar while the song shills for it, not to mentioning making broad claims about San Francisco's place in rock music while being set to a bloodless anti-rock anthem. It is truley a song that shall live in infamy.

[Shellhead]

For sheer wretched, ear-bleeding, sanity-breaking Lovecraftian evil NOTHING compares to Starship's "We Built This City." It's arrangements are crassly commercial, yet utterly uncatchy, and thus devoid of any appealing elements. The vocals are more authentically robotic than any Kraftwerk song. The lyrics are filled with awkward rhymes and just plain bad phrases. Moreover, the denounce the corporate dollar while the song shills for it, not to mentioning making broad claims about San Francisco's place in rock music while being set to a bloodless anti-rock anthem. It is truley a song that shall live in infamy.

Yeah, that song was truly awful. Worse yet, there was the cheesy video in heavy rotation while it was on the charts. It's very upsetting to realize that there was even a tenuous connection between this song and the works of Jefferson Airplane. Grace Slick's career thankfully ended not long after that odious hit. She's probably a barrista at Starbuck's these days.

[Grant]

I've said it before and I'll say it again...

http://www.80smusiclyrics.com/images/djohnson.jpg

Don Johnson "Heartbeat

I don´t care what you say
You can give it away
Your money don´t mean much to me
I´ve been out on my own
Going to go it alone now
Cause that´s the way it´s got to be

Everybody tells me how
I can beat the odds for now
I´ve been standing by the fire
I just can´t feel the heat
Can´t feel the heat

Heartbeat
I´m looking for a heartbeat
Heartbeat
I´m looking for a heartbeat
Beating like mine

Looking at me, it´s easy to see
You think you know just how I feel
Well you do me wrong
And it won´t take me long
Before my restless heart will heal

I´m looking for love, a love like mine
They tell me it´s so hard to find
Well I can feel it in the rhythms
The heartbeat in the streets

Heartbeat
I´m looking for a heartbeat
Heartbeat
I´m looking for a heartbeat
Beating like mine
Beating like mine

Tell me what you feel now
We´ve got a heartbeat
Baby is it real now
We´ve got a heartbeat
Heartbeat

Heartbeat
I´m looking for a heartbeat
Heartbeat
I´m looking for a heartbeat
Heartbeat...

[Royal]

Man, even with post #2 I'm too slow to mention how awful My Humps is. There's a country song out now called Honky Tonk Bodonkadonk that is even dumber than Achey Break Heart. Can't recall who does it though.

ummm....why is Country slinging urban slang?

[Royal]

I've said it before and I'll say it again...

http://www.80smusiclyrics.com/images/djohnson.jpg

Don Johnson "Heartbeat


Grant dude. "Heartbeat" don't count. It was part of a storyline that got airplay by dumb record execs trying to get the MV rub.

You might as well group Don Frye's "Smuggler's Blues" in as well.

[howyadoin]

even dumber than Achey Break Heart.... and that's pretty fuckin' dumb.

[Buried Alien]

For sheer wretched, ear-bleeding, sanity-breaking Lovecraftian evil NOTHING compares to Starship's "We Built This City." It's arrangements are crassly commercial, yet utterly uncatchy, and thus devoid of any appealing elements. The vocals are more authentically robotic than any Kraftwerk song. The lyrics are filled with awkward rhymes and just plain bad phrases. Moreover, the denounce the corporate dollar while the song shills for it, not to mentioning making broad claims about San Francisco's place in rock music while being set to a bloodless anti-rock anthem. It is truley a song that shall live in infamy.

I keep on hearing this, but while I certainly don't have any particular liking for the song, it doesn't live up to the tales of woe you guys tell about it. It's mainly just...kind of generic. Not bad, not good...just a generic 1980s pop/rock song. I have heard worse before...MUCH worse.




Buried Alien (The Fastest Post Alive!)

[Pinball]

It would have to be pretty darn bad to beat out Richard Harris's "McArthur's Park"

[P-Man]

ummm....why is Country slinging urban slang?

Because southern white kids listen to both Garth Brooks and 50 Cent. They laugh thier ass off at both Jeff Foxworthy and Chris Rock. Most areas of the south have a large black population, so it's only natural that white kids are going to get large doses of both redneck and black culture. The dude who recorded that song was just trying to tap into that market.

That song still sucks though. Tell you what, it ain't got shit on some of the other crap country that's been hitting the airwaves though. Mind you, I actually like a lot of the modern pop-country that so many on this board despise, but here some of the dumbest lyrics I've ever heard:

If Heaven, by Andy Griggs

If heaven was an hour, it'd be twilight
When the fireflies start dancin on the lawn
And suppers on the stove and mammas laughin
And everybodys workin' day is done

If heaven was a town, it would be my town
On a summer day in 1965
And everything I wanted was out there waiting
And everyone I loved was still alive

Don't cry a tear for me now baby
There comes a time we must all say goodbye
And if that's what heavens made of
You know I'm not afraid to die

If heaven was a pie it'd be cherry
Cool and sweet and heavy on your tongue
And just one bite would satisfy your hunger
And there'd always be enough for everyone

If heaven was a train, it'd be a fast one
To take this weary traveler round the bend
And if heaven was a tear it'd be my last one
And you'd be in my arms again

Here's some lyrics from the "lovely" Shania Twain:

Tell me about it.
Ooh!

Men...
Have you ever tried to figure 'em out?
Huh, me too, but I ain't got no clue
How 'bout you?

Men are like shoes
A bit too confused
Yeah, there's so many of 'em
I don't know which ones to choose
(yeah, yeah, yeah)
Ah, sing it to me
If you agree
(yeah, yeah, yeah)


There's the kind made for runnin'
The sneakers and the low down heels
The kind that will keep you on your toes
And every girl knows how that feels
(yeah, yeah, yeah)
Ouch, ah sing it with me
(yeah, yeah, yeah)

You've got your kickers and your ropers
Your everyday loafers, and some that you can never find
You've got your slippers and your zippers
Your grabbers and your grippers
Man, don't ya hate that kind?
Some you wear in, some you wear out
Some you wanna leave behind
Sometimes you hate 'em
And sometimes you love 'em
I guess it all depends on which way you rub 'em
But a girl can never have too many of 'em

It's amazing what a little polish will do...
Men are like shoes.

Some make you feel ten feet tall (tall)
Some make you feel so small (so small)
Some you want to leave out in the hall (out in the hall)
Or make you feel like kicking the wall (like kicking the wall)
(yeah, yeah, yeah)

Ah, sing it with me, girls
Ooh! (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Mmm...

Some can polish up pretty good...
Ah, men are like shoes.

It's amazing what a little polish will do
Some clean up good, just like new
Some you can't afford, some are real cheap
Some are good for bummin' around on the beach
(You've got your kickers and your ropers)
(Your everyday loafers)
Yeah some that you can never find
(You've got your slippers and your zippers)
(Your grabbers and your grippers)
And man, don't ya hate that kind?

I ain't got time for the flip-flop kind...
Men are like shoes!

And now, I give you the single worst line I've ever heard, brought to you by Montgomery Gentry:

"Gone like a freight-train, gone like yesterday
Gone like a soldier in the civil war, bang bang"

[Sanagi]

I keep on hearing this, but while I certainly don't have any particular liking for the song, it doesn't live up to the tales of woe you guys tell about it. It's mainly just...kind of generic. Not bad, not good...just a generic 1980s pop/rock song. I have heard worse before...MUCH worse.




Buried Alien (The Fastest Post Alive!)
I agree, there are tons of songs more painful to listen to than that one. And the lyrics may suck but not on the level of "Someone left a cake out in the rain." I'd much rather hear "We Built this City" than, say, "I'm Too Sexy," or "Rico Suave."

[thehod]

You guys have no idea over terrible songs until you've been exposed to the British Pop Novelty Record.

These are usually released at Christmas and coincide with the latest popular fad.

So we have records based on the likes of Mr Blobby, Bob the Builder, the Tellitubbies etc, etc, etc.

Either that, or something major happens in a popular soap opera, and a record is released at the same time so you get dirge such as Angry Andersons "Suddenly" or Nick fucking Berry's "Every looser wins."

But the worst of my bile is those records that try to jump onto the bandwagon and get it so monumentally wrong, and the worst ever offender was Sarah Brightman & Hot Gossip's "I lost my heart to a Starship Trooper" (http://www.xs4all.nl/~josvg/cits/sb/singles/starsh2.jpg)

Just check out the lyrics


Speaker 1:
Arcaida
X-ray X-ray delta niner niner zero
This is Starfleet Control
You are clear to go hyper space
Acknowledge
Speaker 2:
Affirmative, Star Comm
We have situation gold
Speaker 1:
Niner niner zero, roger
You're looking good for trans-light

Sarah singing:
I lost my heart to a starship trooper
I lost my heart to a starship trooper
Oh...

Hey, Captain Strange, won't you be my lover
You're the best thing that I've ever discovered
Flash Gordon's left me, he's gone to the stars
An evil Darth Vader has me banished to Mars

Tell me, Captain Strange, do you feel my devotion
Or are you like a droid, devoid of emotion
Encounters one and two are not enough for me
What my body needs is close encounter three

I lost my heart to a starship trooper
Flashing lights in hyper space
Fighting for the Federation
Hand in hand we'll conquer space

Listen, Captain Strange, what's our destination
The scanners seem to indicate a small deviation
Static on the comm - it's Starfleet Command
Requesting your position, it's their final demand

You're intentions are known, they've found out at last
So if you're gonna take me, please make it fast
Touch me, feel me, do what you will
I want to feel that galatic thrill

I lost my heart to a starship trooper
Flashing lights in hyper space
Fighting for the Federation
Hand in hand we'll conquer space

Speaker 1:
Niner niner zero
This is Star Comm
We got a problem
On your vector
Request status check
Over

Sarah singing:
Oh, baby...

Speaker 3:
Arcadia
This is Strategy Control
You have course devation
At five mark six
Acknowledge

Sarah singing:
I love you...

Speaker 1:
Arcaida
We show condition red
Confirm

Sarah singing:
Love me...

Speaker 3:
What's going on out there

Sarah singing:
Oh...
I lost my heart to a starship trooper
Flashing lights in hyper space
Fighting for the Federation
Hand in hand we'll conquer space
I lost my heart to a starship trooper
Oh...

Space suit is lying on control room floor
Pulse rate increasing as the heat factor soars
Take me, make me feel the force
Ignore the computers, we're locked on course

I lost my heart to a starship trooper
Flashing lights in hyper space
Fighting for the Federation
Hand in hand we'll conquer space

I lost my heart to a starship trooper
Flashing lights in hyper space
Fighting for the Federation
Hand in hand we'll conquer space


Speaker 1, while Sarah sings
the previous lines repeatedly:
Niner niner zero
This is Star Comm
Be advised
You have serious vector deviation
I repeat: serious vector deviation

Arcadia
Niner niner zero
Do you copy

This is Starfleet Control
To all ships in sector five
Be advided
Arcadia
Niner niner zero
Is off course
All ships squawk ident

Starship Arcadia
This is Starfleet Control
Squawk ident
I repeat: squawk ident


If Satan doesn't have a special place set aside in hell just for everyone associated with this travesty, then there is no justice in the world.

[Adam Crocker]

I keep on hearing this, but while I certainly don't have any particular liking for the song, it doesn't live up to the tales of woe you guys tell about it. It's mainly just...kind of generic. Not bad, not good...just a generic 1980s pop/rock song. I have heard worse before...MUCH worse.

To you perhaps, but I found it be utterly wretched, even by 80s standards. It's like they set out to take a generic 80s pop song and increase in the awfulness a hundred fold with some sort of supervillain awfulness ray.

[IronMagnus]

Here's some lyrics from the "lovely" Shania Twain:


Actually, Shania didn't write "Shoes". It's one of the few songs she put out that was written by other Nashville songwriters.

[Dennis K]

Actually, Shania didn't write "Shoes". It's one of the few songs she put out that was written by other Nashville songwriters.


Does Shania's new perfume really make you smell like Mutt Lange's been laying on top of you for an hour? Just asking.

[Valmore]

I keep on hearing this, but while I certainly don't have any particular liking for the song, it doesn't live up to the tales of woe you guys tell about it. It's mainly just...kind of generic. Not bad, not good...just a generic 1980s pop/rock song. I have heard worse before...MUCH worse.[/COLOR]

Except there's one slight problem to this:

This song is now linked in infamy to the Jefferson line of music. The line of music that brought such great classic rock hits like "Somebody to Love" and "White Rabbit" is now linked to such a lackluster, dollar-fueled piece of generic crap.

Had it been just some random 1-hit wonder band from the 1980's, it would just have been written off as generic fodder from the time period. They'd be listed with A-ha, The Thompson Twins, A Flock of Seagulls, etc. and nobody would really care.

But this came from the band that used to produce good music.

[Buried Alien]

Except there's one slight problem to this:

This song is now linked in infamy to the Jefferson line of music. The line of music that brought such great classic rock hits like "Somebody to Love" and "White Rabbit" is now linked to such a lackluster, dollar-fueled piece of generic crap.

Had it been just some random 1-hit wonder band from the 1980's, it would just have been written off as generic fodder from the time period. They'd be listed with A-ha, The Thompson Twins, A Flock of Seagulls, etc. and nobody would really care.

But this came from the band that used to produce good music.

Well...you know, even the Beatles recorded "Revolution 9." If the most acclaimed pop/rock band in history could release *that* waste of time, "We Built This City" is nothing. :)



Buried Alien (The Fastest Post Alive!)

[DDM]

I happen to catch part of "My Humps" while channel surfing. It is an awful song. "My humps/my humps/my lovely lady lumps"???

Weird Al don't need to parody a song that's already a joke. "My humps" could be misconstrude as a breast cancer lump too.

[Shellhead]

Well...you know, even the Beatles recorded "Revolution 9." If the most acclaimed pop/rock band in history could release *that* waste of time, "We Built This City" is nothing. :)



Buried Alien (The Fastest Post Alive!)

You and I dislike Revolution 9, but it was actually very revolutionary, predating the popularity of sampling in rap, gothic industrial and various forms of electronica. The local college radio station (online at www.radiok.org) has a weekly program called "Some Assembly Required", and even a casual listen to it reveals that Revolution 9 inspired many people.

[DDM]

For sheer wretched, ear-bleeding, sanity-breaking Lovecraftian evil NOTHING compares to Starship's "We Built This City." It's arrangements are crassly commercial, yet utterly uncatchy, and thus devoid of any appealing elements. The vocals are more authentically robotic than any Kraftwerk song. The lyrics are filled with awkward rhymes and just plain bad phrases. Moreover, the denounce the corporate dollar while the song shills for it, not to mentioning making broad claims about San Francisco's place in rock music while being set to a bloodless anti-rock anthem. It is truley a song that shall live in infamy.

Bernie Taupin wrote "We Built This City" along with the rest of Starship's songs from Knee Deep in the Hoopla album. It was a big hit in 1985.

[Adam Crocker]

Well...you know, even the Beatles recorded "Revolution 9." If the most acclaimed pop/rock band in history could release *that* waste of time, "We Built This City" is nothing. :)

Well I agree with your overall sentiment about a band's good work not necessarily making their bad work even worst, I'm with Shellhead on this. It's hard to say that "Revolution 9" makes "We Built This City" look good in comparison when the former at least has the virtue of being a groundbreaking sound collage while the latter is a shameless piece of cash-in 80s pop. If nothing else the Beatles were at least trying whereas Starship had surrendered to commercial trends. (As a matter of personal preference while I can't bother to sit through "Revolution 9" though it never made me cringe, particularly not like "We Built This City.")

[Shellhead]

Except there's one slight problem to this:

This song is now linked in infamy to the Jefferson line of music. The line of music that brought such great classic rock hits like "Somebody to Love" and "White Rabbit" is now linked to such a lackluster, dollar-fueled piece of generic crap.

Had it been just some random 1-hit wonder band from the 1980's, it would just have been written off as generic fodder from the time period. They'd be listed with A-ha, The Thompson Twins, A Flock of Seagulls, etc. and nobody would really care.

But this came from the band that used to produce good music.

And also some very innovative and experimental music. It hurts to think that there is this awful connection between "We Built This City" and "Chushingura" or even "Blues from an Airplane."

[Buried Alien]

I agree, there are tons of songs more painful to listen to than that one. And the lyrics may suck but not on the level of "Someone left a cake out in the rain." I'd much rather hear "We Built this City" than, say, "I'm Too Sexy," or "Rico Suave."

Just the dreaded year of 1990 alone offered at least a half dozen songs (if not more) that made "We Built This City" sound like "Hey Jude" by comparison: M.C. Hammer, Vanilla Ice, New Kids On The Block, Milli Vanilli, and Michael Bolton all experienced a banner year on the charts in 1990. Surely, I could find at least one track from each of those performers from that year alone that would be much worse than 'We Built This City."


Buried Alien (The Fastest Post Alive!)

[JeffreyWKramer]

Just the dreaded year of 1990 alone offered at least a half dozen songs (if not more) that made "We Built This City" sound like "Hey Jude" by comparison: M.C. Hammer, Vanilla Ice, New Kids On The Block, Milli Vanilli, and Michael Bolton all experienced a banner year on the charts in 1990. Surely, I could find at least one track from each of those performers from that year alone that would be much worse than 'We Built This City."


MC Hammer sampled Rick James, Vanilla Ice sampled Bowie/Queen. Starship was apparently sampling Xanax. The New Kids seem rocking and energetic compared to the limp guitars and synth in "We Built This City."

[cactusmaac]

The Cheeky Girls song.

The horror!

[Sanagi]

MC Hammer sampled Rick James, Vanilla Ice sampled Bowie/Queen. Starship was apparently sampling Xanax. The New Kids seem rocking and energetic compared to the limp guitars and synth in "We Built This City."
Oh hell no.

I'll listen to We Built This City five times in a row before I listen to Hangin' Tough once.

(and Rico Suave is about ten times worse than that)

[DubipR]

2 songs that scored in the Top 10 in the 80s:

Pac-Man Fever by Buckner & Garcia.
Hated that song then, still hate it now.

Curly Shuffle by The Jump in the Saddle Band.
While I love the Stooges, this song is just utterly stupid!

[Grant]

Grant dude. "Heartbeat" don't count. It was part of a storyline that got airplay by dumb record execs trying to get the MV rub.

You might as well group Don Frye's "Smuggler's Blues" in as well.

Fine I pick "Somebody's Watching Me" by Rockwell (with backing vocals by Michael and Jermaine Jackson).

[Pinball]

Fine I pick "Somebody's Watching Me" by Rockwell (with backing vocals by Michael and Jermaine Jackson).
That song might suck, but it is pretty relevant right now.

[Grant]

That song might suck, but it is pretty relevant right now.

Which means we get to hear it on News stories about the Patriot Act. Oh joy.

[Adam Crocker]

MC Hammer sampled Rick James, Vanilla Ice sampled Bowie/Queen. Starship was apparently sampling Xanax. The New Kids seem rocking and energetic compared to the limp guitars and synth in "We Built This City."

This is true. And for the record I have chanced upon hearing these songs again (can't remember where) long after their hey-day in the 90s when I finally had a sense of taste. And even then they don't compare to "We Built This City." Hell New Kids were actually catchy and hooky in the way you expect all insipid teen pop to be. I'd even rate Bon Jovi's work over "We Built This City."

However, he may have a case with Bolton's insipid warbling. Fortunately for me, I don't know any Michael Bolton songs.

[ZombieHavoc]

I keep on hearing this, but while I certainly don't have any particular liking for the song, it doesn't live up to the tales of woe you guys tell about it. It's mainly just...kind of generic. Not bad, not good...just a generic 1980s pop/rock song. I have heard worse before...MUCH worse.




Buried Alien (The Fastest Post Alive!)

i agree. i remember on vh1s awesomely bad songs thing, half the list that ranked better than starship was actually worse.

this is by no means the worst song ever. i would rather listen to this song on repeat for a week than the majority of pop/r&b/ludacris junk that all you kids love these days.

[Shellhead]

Even worse than "We Built This City" are a couple of really crappy tv theme songs:

That shrill "I Don't Want to Wait" theme to Dawson's Creek.

That horribly whiny "Save Me" theme to Smallville.

[Valmore]

Even worse than "We Built This City" are a couple of really crappy tv theme songs:

That shrill "I Don't Want to Wait" theme to Dawson's Creek.

That horribly whiny "Save Me" theme to Smallville.

Both were actual album songs before they were made into theme songs, if I recall. Paula Cole had long released "I Don't Want to Wait" before Dawson's Creek used it. Though you wouldn't know it for Remy Zero's "Save Me" - without Smallville, Remy Zero probably wouldn't have received any airplay. However, I like "Save Me" okay.

[Buried Alien]

Even worse than "We Built This City" are a couple of really crappy tv theme songs:

That shrill "I Don't Want to Wait" theme to Dawson's Creek.

That horribly whiny "Save Me" theme to Smallville.

Others I consider worse than "We Built This City":

Sixpence None The Richer's cover of the La's "There She Goes"

Nelly Furtado's "I'm Like A Bird"

Faith Hill's "This Kiss"

Celine Dion's entire discography

And if this doesn't top "We Built This City" for worst song sweepstakes, I don't know what will: Meat Loaf's "I Will Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)"

Buried Alien (The Fastest Post Alive!)

[Shellhead]

However, I like "Save Me" okay.

Out of honest, morbid, non-snarky curiosity, what do you like about it? To me, the vocals seem shrill and whiny, the lyrics are extremely repetitive, and the guitar just churns aimlessly. I will reluctantly admit that I like the ending a little bit, but I'm not sure if that's relief or if I actually like the way the song closes out.

[Grant]

Sixpence None The Richer's cover of the La's "There She Goes"

It's bland but I wouldn't say it's bad.

Nelly Furtado's "I'm Like A Bird"

It's irritating but kind of catchy.

Faith Hill's "This Kiss"

Celine Dion's entire discography

Can't argue with that.

[Grant]

I throw in Cher's "Believe"

That song sounds like it was sung by a robotic drag queen.

[Slam_Bradley]

Barry Manilow's "I Write the Songs" drives me to near homicidal fury.

[Grant]

Barry Manilow's "I Write the Songs" drives me to near homicidal fury.

Maybe you should stop listening to it.

[Buried Alien]

Barry Manilow's "I Write the Songs" drives me to near homicidal fury.

The song (which was, ironically, not written by Manilow but by former substitute Beach Boy Bruce Johnston) actually isn't bad on its own merits (although a bit sappy), but Manilow's voice can make anything sound annoying. Half of his own hits might have been better records if someone else with a less irritating voice had recorded them.


Buried Alien (The Fastest Post Alive!)

[Slam_Bradley]

Maybe you should stop listening to it.

I desparately try not too. It just seems to crop up here and there.

[JeffreyWKramer]

The song (which was, ironically, not written by Manilow but by former substitute Beach Boy Bruce Johnston) actually isn't bad on its own merits...

Wrong, wrong, wrong. It is a wretched song. Narcissistic wankery of the lowest order.

[Grant]

I desparately try not too. It just seems to crop up here and there.

I think I heard it maybe twice in my life.

[Grant]

Wrong, wrong, wrong. It is a wretched song. Narcissistic wankery of the lowest order.

Even lower then Don Johnson's "Heartbeat?"

[Buried Alien]

Even lower then Don Johnson's "Heartbeat?"

Or, continuing in the vein of 1980s actors who really shouldn't have been singing, Patrick Swayze's "She's Like The Wind" from the DIRTY DANCING soundtrack and Bruce Willis' "Respect Yourself".







Buried Alien (The Fastest Post Alive!)

[zombie]

I'd rather listen to "We Built This City" than anything recorded by Celine Dion, whose voice and character just annoy me. Really, I don't see what's so terrible about "We Built This City", or most other songs from the 80s that people say are horrible.

[Royal]

Or, continuing in the vein of 1980s actors who really shouldn't have been singing, Patrick Swayze's "She Like The Wind" from the DIRTY DANCING soundtrack and Bruce Willis' "Respect Yourself".







Buried Alien (The Fastest Post Alive!)


http://eil.com/newGallery/Eddie-Murphy-Party-All-The-Tim-293887.jpg

[Shellhead]

Really, I don't see what's so terrible about "We Built This City", or most other songs from the 80s that people say are horrible.

Okay, I will get specific.

Thin, high vocals. A real cheap-sounding, monotone, shrill, and repetitive keyboard sound. Shallow, stupid, vapid lyrics, which include the word "hoopla":


"We built this city, we built this city on rock an' roll
Built this city, we built this city on rock an' roll

Say you don't know me, or recognize my face
Say you don't care who goes to that kind of place
Knee deep in the hoopla, sinking in your fight
Too many runaways eating up the night

Marconi plays the mamba, listen to the radio, don't you remember
We built this city, we built this city on rock an' roll

CHORUS

Someone's always playing corporation games
Who cares they're always changing corporation names
We just want to dance here, someone stole the stage
They call us irresponsible, write us off the page

Marconi plays the mamba, listen to the radio, don't you remember
We built this city, we built this city on rock an' roll

CHORUS

It's just another Sunday, in a tired old street
Police have got the choke hold, oh, then we just lost the beat

Who counts the money underneath the bar
Who rides the wrecking ball in two wild guitars
Don't tell us you need us, 'cos we're just simple fools
Looking for America, coming through your schools

(I'm looking out over that Golden Gate bridge
Out on a gorgeous sunny Saturday, I've seen that low amount of traffic)

Don't you remember (remember)

(Here's your favorite radio station, in your favorite radio city
The city by the bay, the city that rocks, the city that never sleeps)

Marconi plays the mamba, listen to the radio, don't you remember
We built this city, we built this city on rock and roll"

CHORUS

[Buried Alien]

A sorry sight indeed, but no sorrier than this:

The right stuff
The right stuff
First time was a great time
Second time was a blast
Third time I fell in love
Now I hope it lasts
I can see it in your walk
Tell ’em when you talk
See it in everything you do
Even in your thoughts

You got the right stuff, baby
Love the way you turn me on
You got the right stuff, baby
You’re the reason why I sing this song
All that I needed was you
Oh girl, you’re so right
Said all that I wanted was you
You made all my dreams come true

Chorus:
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
The right stuff
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
The right stuff

Your first kiss was a sweet kiss
Second kiss had a twist
Third and your fourth kiss
I don’t want to miss
I can see it in your walk
Tell ’em when you talk
See it in everything you do
Even in your thoughts

You got the right stuff, baby
Love the way you turn me on
You got the right stuff, baby
You’re the reason why I sing this song
All that I needed was you
Oh girl, you’re so right
Said all that I wanted was you
You made all.... every one of my dreams come true

Repeat chorus

The right stuff, girl, yeah baby, yeah
You know you got the right stuff
And girl, yeah, baby
You know, you know you got it, girl

In my life, you’re so right
You made all.... you know what you did

Repeat chorus and fade

The worst part: read that chorus again and then realize that the end instructs you to REPEAT CHORUS.


Buried Alien (The Fastest Post Alive!)

[zombie]

Okay, I will get specific.

Thin, high vocals. A real cheap-sounding, monotone, shrill, and repetitive keyboard sound. Shallow, stupid, vapid lyrics, which include the word "hoopla":

Okay. It may be stupid, but that's part of the charm. Or maybe I just look back at most music from the 80s as a joke to begin with, and don't judge it too harshly.

And I like the word hoopla.

[Shellhead]

And I like the word hoopla.

What about hootenanny?

[zombie]

What about hootenanny?

That's a good one too.

[Valmore]

Out of honest, morbid, non-snarky curiosity, what do you like about it? To me, the vocals seem shrill and whiny, the lyrics are extremely repetitive, and the guitar just churns aimlessly. I will reluctantly admit that I like the ending a little bit, but I'm not sure if that's relief or if I actually like the way the song closes out.

I kind of like the dynamics of the song. The lyrics aren't as repetitive as other songs that I like even more.

Don't get me wrong, it's not my favorite song by any means. I just liked it okay.

[Grant]

Or, continuing in the vein of 1980s actors who really shouldn't have been singing, Patrick Swayze's "She Like The Wind" from the DIRTY DANCING soundtrack and Bruce Willis' "Respect Yourself".

Both of those songs had something that resembled a melody though.

[DDM]

http://eil.com/newGallery/Eddie-Murphy-Party-All-The-Tim-293887.jpg


Eddie Murphy really just recorded a Rick James song. At worst, Eddie is a Mary Jane Girl.

[Dennis K]

How many songs did Venom record?

[LiNo]

Ah, The Right Stuff ain't so bad. NKOTB were the first concert I ever went to - true story.

Worst songs, worst songs...

My Lumps is pretty bad
Rollin' rollin' rollin' by Limp Bizkit is worse
but Crazy Frog tops them all (Chris Martin will forever be scarred)

[Shellhead]

I kind of like the dynamics of the song. The lyrics aren't as repetitive as other songs that I like even more.

Don't get me wrong, it's not my favorite song by any means. I just liked it okay.

Fair enough. I guess I like that echoing fade at the end a little bit.

[DanH]

Was Not Was-EveryBody Walk The Dinosaur

[Shellhead]

Was Not Was-EveryBody Walk The Dinosaur

That's a below average song by one of my favorite groups. I can understand why it was popular for a while, because it's pop and there were some awesome girls in the video. But it sounds dated and kind of annoying to me now.

Much better Was (Not Was) songs:

Spy in the House of Love
I Blew Up the United States
Papa Was a Rollin' Stone (cover)
11 M.P.H.
Wedding Vows in Vegas (w/Frank Sinatra Jr.)
Shadow & Jimmy (written by Elvis Costello)

[LoneWolf21]

Shatner singing "Rocket Man"?

[thehod]

Shatner singing "Rocket Man"?

How dare you.
That was a work of genius.

Almost as good as his "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds."

"Lucy.... In the sky, with...... Diamonds!!!"

His version of Pulp's "Common People" is another classic.

Yes please, I'll have some more of that LSD over here if you don't mind.

[DDM]

Siouxsie & the Banshees, "O Baby"

"O Baby" is a fine pop song, but it is not a Banshees pop song. "B-Side Ourselves" is much better material; I'm surprised they did not release it as a single instead...

[howyadoin]

How dare you.
That was a work of genius.

Almost as good as his "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds."

"Lucy.... In the sky, with...... Diamonds!!!"

His version of Pulp's "Common People" is another classic.

Yes please, I'll have some more of that LSD over here if you don't mind.I know you're joking, but it's weird how many people would say that seriously. It's like they can't tell the difference between funny and good.

Anybody ever see that movie Thunderstruck, about the 5 guys who are AC/DC fans? There's a hilarious scene in it where they're driving along and one of them starts singing "Total Eclipse of the Heart". They crucify the song - fuck the lyrics up and generally sing like complete hams.

And it's funny as hell, but it hardly qualifies as good.

[Adam Crocker]

I know you're joking, but it's weird how many people would say that seriously. It's like they can't tell the difference between funny and good.

I agree. It's a favourite of mine, but mostly because his vocal delivery is so obviously inadequate and unusual that it turns a sad stab at singing into high camp.

(In contrast his version of "Common People" actually qualifies as good since his spoken word delivery is deliberate with the arrangements built around it.)