Family Guy Favorites

[Azrael52]

Favorite Family Guy Quotes. List 'em.

How about "Holy Crap! Optimus Prime, you're Jewish?!"

[The Xenos]

This last ep was gold!

"Why thank you Tinkle Fairy."

"Well it shouldn't, because it's my side boob."

-Xenos

[Sanagi]

Not a quote, but when Stewie found out he really was singing flat on F#.

[Azrael52]

Mr. Weed fires Peter and his response is "Oh, crap. For how long?"

Classic.

[Alex Scott]

On their new neighbor, Nigel Pinchley:

Lois: "He's charming, all Englishmen are."

Peter: "That's what they said about Benjamin Disraeli."

It cuts to Benjamin Disraeli sitting at his desk.

Benjamin Disraeli (turning to the camera): "You don't even know who I am."

[bert]

Stewie, pacing back and forth in front of a plate of veggies:

"So, broccoli.

Mother says you're good for me."

WELL, I'M NO GOOD FOR YOU! "

(then he runs off to invent a weather machine to make it cold so all broccoli dies)

[Azrael52]

Peter talking about reading something in a book.

Brian: "Are you sure it was a book? Are you sure it wasn't nothing ?

[Paploo the Ewok]

KoolAid Man's OH YEAH burst into the courtroom, then his embarassed, quiet, prolonged exit.

Also, not a specific moment, but I adore the constant, everincreasing hatred/indifference everyone has for Meg.

[Azrael52]

I like how they always find something athletic for Joe to do. Also, I love the episode where Joe gets his legs back during a skiing accident only to have Kevin land on him and cripple him again. (Sorry, that sentence should have more punctuation, but I'm a rebel!)

[Goody]

I think they're taking it too far with the Meg hating right now. Not that FG was ever a show known for it's restraint.

[Azrael52]

What about when they all get superpowers and Meg's is that she can grow her fingernails really long.

[blackcanary_416]

1) Stewy holding up something when Meg is without her glasses saying something along the lines of "Is this a toblerone?"

2) The sequence when Peter goes to get in the chopper that has his face on it.

3) Stewy and the cult leader. Zap!

4) Peter is in the wheel chair and shows the news guy his "tragic video" and its a scarecrow being hit by a car and when you slow it down its him driving the car.

5) Stewy really fat and trying to lick the ice cream cone and falling asleep. LOL. I start laughing just thinking about it.

[Lunar Daydreamer]

Haven't seen much Family Guy, but I remember one with a guy in a wheelchair, who wins a trophy and is held aloft by his team mates.

Stewie gets in ...

"Ahh the cyborg is dismounted... I COMMAND YOU TO MOVE!"

I really need to see more of this show :)

Any idea why Kevin Smith hates this show so much?!

[blackcanary_416]

Haven't seen much Family Guy, but I remember one with a guy in a wheelchair, who wins a trophy and is held aloft by his team mates.

Stewie gets in ...

"Ahh the cyborg is dismounted... I COMMAND YOU TO MOVE!"

I really need to see more of this show :)

Any idea why Kevin Smith hates this show so much?!

LOL. Yeah, that one too. "Go Cybowg, Go Cybowg!"

[Lunar Daydreamer]

Not a quote as such, but there was an Ep where the family go off on adventures and leave the dog at home. He orders pizza, then can't find the remote, then much to his despair is stuck on a soap opera channel.

It cuts back to him later and he's in tears, barely touched the pizza and shouting at the characters on screen, so so lost in the episode!

:D

[Selina Quinzel]

Brian to Peter- "They sent you a card, but it said "for Peter" on it so you must of thought it was from you, so you didn't...you know, its just easier to call you stupid."

The whole German tour bus scene with the too positive guide copping out on the Holocaust era is great, but especially...
Brian- You can't just ignore those years. Thomas Mann fled to America because of Nazism's stranglehold on Germany!
Tour guide- Nope, nope. He left to manage a Dairy Queen.

Also, anything Adam West said as the mayor is pure gold. Oh, and I'll admit that I laugh way, way too hard everytime I see the Kool-Aid dude busting through the courtroom wall.

[Azrael52]

The Kool-Aid thing and the sun dropping the 2 scoops of raisins on people's cars and setting off their alarms. Freakin' great!

How about when Tom and Diane think their feed is down?
Tom-"I'm the Lord Jesus Chris. Think I'll go beat up some midgets."
Diane-"I just plain don't like Black People."

F'n great!

[Azrael52]

Oh! I was just posting on my "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" thread and remembered the episode where Peter gets the golden ticket to go to Pawtucket (sp.) Pat's brewery. Oh, man. "Aren't you glad that you're not a horse?"

[Tommy]

*Lois sits holding Meg’s diary while the rest of the family sits in a circle around her*

Lois: “Dear Diary, Kevin is so hot. Today he was out in the yard raking leaves.

*Everyone laughs*

Lois: God, I wish he’d throw me into that pile of leaves.

*Everyone laughs*

*Meg enters*

Meg: Hey, what’s everybody… oh my God, my diary! I hate you all!

*Meg runs off crying*

Peter: Keep going.

*Lois flips the page.*

[kcarroll]

Brian: Hi, I'm Brian, I was born here.
Farmer: well, we've had a lot of puppies born here.
Brian: I'm the one who could talk.
Farmer: Oh, Brian!

Eliza: You're breath smells like kitty litter
Stewie: I was curious!

Brian and Stewie remain my two favorite characters. everyhting else is pretty much filler until they come on the screen.

[Azrael52]

When Peter is Death and he's on the plane to kill the kids from Dawson's Creek. The girlscouts singing: "We like being alive, we like being alive, we like being, oh we like being, oh we like being alive!" Funny stuff.

[Tommy]

Diane: Tom you're so far in the closet you're finding Christmas presents.

Peter: Math is merely the lesbian sister of biology.

[Azrael52]

What about when Brian sniffs Quagmyer (sp?) and says he's had sex w/2 women and a man. Q says something like "You mean 3 women?" and then realization dawns on him and we see him get visibly ill.

[Phoney Bone]

Adam West: We invited Reverend Jesse Jackson to open up our ceremonies with a prayer. Unfortunately he could not make it, so instead we have LaToya Jackson.
LaToya Jackson: Rub a dub dub, thanks for the grub. Yea God!



Quagmire: Mom if you want this three-way to happen, you're gonna have to change your tone.



Cleveland: I must say, I do feel a strange satisfation watchin' the black ball topple all those self-righteous white pins.
Joe: Can't blame 'em for being self-righteous, the black ball's in their neighborhood uninvited.
Cleveland: The black ball's done nothing wrong.
Joe: If the black ball's innocent it has nothing to fear.

[Dark Galaxy]

The episode where Chris is a famous artist, and Meg gets all jealous. So Peter is trying to make her feel better and sings a song to her...some of the lyrics are:

Honey you're gonna make our name famous,
You'll be larger than life.
I'll be glad you fell out of my wife.

Holy Crap, first time I saw that I almost choked to death on whatever I was drinking. Good stuff.

[Screwtape]

I'm going to go with:
Lois: Stewie, you've got to eat your broccoli. Here comes the airplaaaaane...
Stewie: Damn you, damn broccoli, and damn the Wright brothers!

Stewie, who can't sleep when a drug deal is going down in the hotel room next to his: Oh, for God's sake. There's only one way to end this. [shouts] HE'S WEARING A WIRE! [rolls over and goes back to sleep as gunshots and curses are heard]

[Azrael52]

Oh, then there's the beginning when they sing the F'n cry part.

[Gaz]

Oh, then there's the beginning when they sing the F'n cry part.
It's "laugh and cry",damn it! McFarlane even says so!

[thehod]

Stewie's "For the love of God, shake me! Shake me like a British nanny!" almost put me in hosptial.

[Phoney Bone]

Lois: What's going on down here?
Stewie: Oh, we're playing house.
Lois: That boy's all tied up.
Stewie: Roman Polanski's house.


Lois: Oh, what about this, Meg? A pink baby-tee that says "Little Slut." That seems pretty hip.
Meg: I don't know if that's really me, Mom.
Lois: Well, they've got one that says "Porn Star" and another that says "Sperm Dumpster." And they're all written in glitter.
Meg: All right, all right. Give me "Sperm Dumpster."
Lois: That's the spirit!


Peter: Oh my god, Brian, there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'
Brian: Peter, those are Cheerios.

[PatrickG]

I really dig the show. Worried that some of the running gags are changing too quickly as the series goes on though.

The hatred of Meg is pretty much a parody of itself.

Ditto Quagmire's perversion. He's gone from being a peeping tom to a deviant to an out and out rapist.

Lois' slutty qualities also seem to be snowballing.

It just seems like they became aware that people found certain jokes funny and so they decided to constantly push them until they evolved from quirks into in-your-face gags.

I think the fault of American Dad is "Too Many Stewies" syndrome and I hope Family Guy doesn't keep progressing down that road. It's one thing to give the characters quirks and quite another to make them ALL into distrubed-but-witty comentators who derail the other characters or instigators like Peter.

Simpsons, to an extent, had this problem but they seem to have curbed it somewhat before it got out of control.

[Azrael52]

It's "laugh and cry",damn it! McFarlane even says so!

I know he does, but he's covering his ass. In another comentary, he even talks about f'n cry. Maybe he sings it, too, but I can't remember.

[Azrael52]

Remember when Lois found Meg's tail while going through her baby stuff?

[Azrael52]

"Ha Ha, that's special joke gum."

"Whadda you mean?"

"Now you're addicted to heroin."

[Azrael52]

Peter - "Yeah, who would've ever guessed that one of [Lois's] buttons would be Wellfare fraud?"

[Azrael52]

A guy at work was making me jealous the other day. He told me that his step-son has now sat in on 2 of the script reading sessions.

Me = Envy

Also, the new season came out on DVD on Tuesday.

[icymatt]

Several faves:

Cuts to a forest where several soldiers are walking out from behind a bush. Peter, dressed in a clown suit then walks out.
[Peter]: You see, you guys are stupid. They're gonna be looking for army guys.

After the bartender explains to Peter and Co. that the new mall has an indoor cattle ranch, a cow walks out the mall's front door with an ice cream cone.
[Cow]: I go to Baskin Robbins every night, and get myself a little treat.

When Peter is driving, the camera switches to his view. While driving, he repeatedly reads a Jughead comic.
[Peter]: You can't eat all those hamburgers. Oh! He's gonna do it.

There's many more, but I dont feel like typing anymore.

[Azrael52]

What about when Elmer Fudd blows the hell out of Bugs?

[Cam63]

You do mean Elmer shot Bugs, don't you ?

[Bored at 3:00AM]

"Lifetime.....television for idiots"

"Look! Look! He runs like a Welshman!"

[Azrael52]

You do mean Elmer shot Bugs, don't you ?

What? You didn't see the deleted scenes? hehehehe dirty boy.

[Azrael52]

I love the one where the cigarette people take over the toy store. The part where the tobacco people open a window and throw this cute little doggy out and someone hands him a shot gun. Boom. Like clay pidgeons.

[Azrael52]

Little Kid "C'mon Joey, throw the silly ball!"
Just then, a hatchet is flung at the kid's baseball bat.

[steeler80]

This isn't a quote but the Super Friends strip poker scene was classic.

[Azrael52]

"Does this look like a Q to you?"

"How about now?"

[Azrael52]

In the episode Dammit Janet, I've never noticed until last night that there is a scene where Stewie and Janet have their mats and blankets pulled next to each other. You can see from their shoulders up and they are apparently naked. WTH?