KISS sucks

[PanzerMega]

Thank you for mentioning that in your interview.

Can't wait for the Villains United special.

[matterconsumer]

Back in the New York Groove...

[Oracle_0128]

ACK!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

I love KISS!!!! This is blasphemy!!!!! How can you not love a bunch of 50 year old guys that wear makeup and dress in black spandex.

Oh...never mind.

[Gail Simone]

I did a Yabs about Kiss once...wish I could remember what month it was in the archives!

Gail

[Ilash]

Yeah, to hell with Kiss. Alice Cooper is definitely the way to go if you're into the whole fella's with makeup thing.

[Trey Krimsin]

What turned me off Kiss? The Kiss Koffin. I still like their music, but what's the point in Kiss Koffins?

[Oracle_0128]

What turned me off Kiss? The Kiss Koffin. I still like their music, but what's the point in Kiss Koffins?


So you can rock out when you are six feet under??

[Trey Krimsin]

True, but what else did Gene Simmons suggest the Koffin could also be used for? A cooler. Now I don't know very many people that would want a coffin, let alone a Kiss Koffin, to be used as a cooler. That's very creepy to me.

[ElvisGuy]

KISS was my first concert !! I was 7 and my parents took me..they dressed me up as Ace Frehley and my mom was Paul Stanley and my dad dressed up as Gene Simmons !...I vividly remember at one point of the show my parents were making out so it looked like Paul and Gene were making out ! LOL!!... no wonder I turned out gay!

[Matt Algren]

I did a Yabs about Kiss once...wish I could remember what month it was in the archives!

GailYou mean this (http://www.comicbookresources.com/columns/index.cgi?column=yabs&article=1090)? Very funny stuff.

(Click the link for more, including the genius ramblings of Rob Liefeld...)KISS TO APPEAR IN COMICS, MAKE CRAPPY ALBUMS

-- "You Wanted The Best, You Got Us, Instead" Says KISS --

CHICAGO

Throngs of confused and easily-dazzled KISS fans all around the world were overjoyed at the breaking news that Dark Horse Comics plans a series of comics featuring the sagging, droopy and not-altogether interesting band of plucky seniors, KISS.

The band's most recognizable member, Gene Simmons, stressed that this was merely a diversion for the band, and that their main consumer product will continue to be lame music and KISS logo mirrors given away at the frog mallet booth at carnivals. "I love comics and all, but yeah, Paul, Ace and whoever that guy is in the cat make-up...our first love is always going to be shitty music."

When BUZZLINE asked a fan after the books were announced why he seemingly enjoyed the repetitive and painfully trite lyrics and creepily juvenile songs, he replied, "Hey, man, Kiss RULEZ! I'll tell you what, man, KISS NEVER SOLD OUT!"

When asked to reconcile his "never sold out" position with the band's attempt at a disco crossover, their feeble power ballad era, their Phantom of the Goddamn Theme Park telefilm, and their hundreds of shoddy KISS products, said fan again repeated his belief that KISS RULEZ.

But the final word on the subject, as always, belonged to Simmons, who held up an arthritic hand in what vaguely resembled his famed demon sign, and said, "I want to rock and roll all night, or at least part of the night, and then take a nap. " He then stuck his tongue out and waved it around as though we hadn't all seen it thousands of times, but the effect was somewhat lessened by the glob of plain oatmeal stuck on the end of it.

[Oracle_0128]

KISS was my first concert !! I was 7 and my parents took me..they dressed me up as Ace Frehley and my mom was Paul Stanley and my dad dressed up as Gene Simmons !...I vividly remember at one point of the show my parents were making out so it looked like Paul and Gene were making out ! LOL!!... no wonder I turned out gay!


They made you dress up like Ace??? Poor guy. At least Peter would have been a bit better.

[TCJohnson]

KISS was my first concert !! I was 7 and my parents took me..they dressed me up as Ace Frehley and my mom was Paul Stanley and my dad dressed up as Gene Simmons !...I vividly remember at one point of the show my parents were making out so it looked like Paul and Gene were making out ! LOL!!... no wonder I turned out gay!


Not just the gayness. That explains EVERYTHING!

[matterconsumer]

I would like to take a moment and fondly remember the Kiss pinball machine.

More fun than their music...

[CURSD BLADE]

I'm too young to know :D

[YoGo]

KISS sucks

Only if you're doing it right.

[Adam Crocker]

Yeah, to hell with Kiss. Alice Cooper is definitely the way to go if you're into the whole fella's with makeup thing.

That's not right. Let me take a look at that.

Yeah, to hell with Kiss. New York Dolls are definitely the way to go if you're into the whole fella's with makeup thing.

I AGREE WITH ILASH 500%!!!

[Cam63]

Thank you for mentioning that in your interview.

Can't wait for the Villains United special.

KISS sucks !?

Five words...No, they fuckin' well don't !

[Phoney Bone]

I used to respect Gene Simmons for his marketing genius.

Then he told those Brit kids KISS wrote "God Gave Rock and Roll to You".

It was written by Petra, the lying bastard.


Gene and Paul suck.


Ace and Peter RULE!

[Cam63]

Well, I am in total shock...

[LibrarianThorne]

Their recorded albums aren't that great.

Their live shows, on the other hand, define what a rock and roll show sould be. I know of no other band that has the cajones to time twenty foot tall columns of flame to a bass beat.

[Cam63]

Their recorded albums aren't that great.

Their live shows, on the other hand, define what a rock and roll show sould be. I know of no other band that has the cajones to time twenty foot tall columns of flame to a bass beat.

Yup !

The KISS of 25 years ago simply rocketh.

[Gail Simone]

Guys, guys, we're forgetting the point: Kiss sucks.

Gail

[PanzerMega]

It takes a brave woman to stand up to the KISS army. You're my hero, Gail.

[Cam63]

We'll miss you, Simmo.

*sobs*

[PatrickG]

They were The Monkees of their day.

[Cam63]

I'll miss you too, Pat'.

*more sobbing*

[Adam Crocker]

They were The Monkees of their day.

That's an insult to the Monkees and you know it!

[LibrarianThorne]

Guys, guys, we're forgetting the point: Kiss sucks.

Gail

:(

Just see them live. I saw them on their farewell tour, and I simply can't go to any modern day concert. I mean, giant columns of fire to a bass beat. That's great entertainment right there, even if their songs aren't the best out there.

[steeler80]

I have to go with the whole "You've gotta see them live" thing. I've never been a huge Kiss fan and any kid that's played guitar for over a month can pretty much duplicate their songs but I saw them in concert with Aerosmith and both bands rocketh.

[Harry Angel]

Guys, guys, we're forgetting the point: Kiss sucks.

Gail


I hate to argue with you on your own board, but you are 100% wrong.

Oh sure the band traveling around these days calling itself KISS is pretty bad. But the original foursome of Gene, Peter, Ace and Paul is one of the greatest pop/rock bands in music history, let alone one of the best live performances ever.

Is the music deep or meaningful?

Of course not.

But is it some of the best "cock rock" ever recorded?

You betcha.

[Cam63]

" Cock rock " !?

LOL. I expect to see that on T-shirts and coffee mugs sometime in the near future. :D

[CaptMagellan]

Their recorded albums aren't that great.

Their live shows, on the other hand, define what a rock and roll show sould be. I know of no other band that has the cajones to time twenty foot tall columns of flame to a bass beat.

Not only great flaming effects but the most topless women at a concert ever.

You get it ALL at a KISS show!

[Adam Crocker]

" Cock rock " !?

LOL. I expect to see that on T-shirts and coffee mugs sometime in the near future. :D

You make it sound like it's a new term.

[Gail Simone]

Yes, but see...Kiss themselves don't even NEED to be at a Kiss show for it to be a spectacle. I don't listen to music thinking, "man, I bet they have neato fire effects at their crappy live shows!"

Gail

[f. chong rutherford]

God Gave Rock and Roll to You was first recorded in 1972 by Argent, but the KISS version is pretty good--as is "Rock and Roll all Night"--as does "Detroit Rock City"

And The New York Dolls RULE THE SCHUUL I MEAN SCHOOL!

[JohnPopa]

I spent my time in the Kiss Army but I have to say -- I've turned in my dog tags. They're just embarrasing now and I don't see how anyone can think otherwise. No, the music wasn't ever good but it was, for me, charming enough. I think Paul's songs especially can be pretty fun three chord rockers -- when he's not writing lyrics like 'UH! All Night.'

But after the rush of the reunion tour they made the colossal error of a) keeping it going and b) letting Gene speak. They should've gone home when they were on top and had nostalgia on their side. Now they're just old and fat and tired and they've rolled out the same awful show four or five times too many. They've tuned the songs as low as they can be tuned, they've slowed the tempos as low as they can go, they've trimmed the show as short as it can be and still not completely piss everyone off -- they're running on nothing but hot air, they're out of ideas and let's be honest, their famed show became SOP in the eighties and who hasn't seen it a million times already? The 'Psycho Circus' innovations were awful in ways I could barely describe and as they pulled more and more of them back the longer the tour whined on, it was obvious that the band knew it.

Now all they are is Gene endlessly gloating about how much he's willing to wring every last dollar out of anyone stupid enough to still be interested in them.

Gail's right -- you don't even need KISS to do a KISS show, which is probably why all the cover bands are so successful, they can do a KISS show but they're not fat and fifty-some years old and they have energy and a real interest in performing the music and doing the show.

KISS would be wise to hire an Official Kiss cover band and let them be KISS. Because the old dogs are long out of new tricks.

[CaptMagellan]

Yes, but see...Kiss themselves don't even NEED to be at a Kiss show for it to be a spectacle. I don't listen to music thinking, "man, I bet they have neato fire effects at their crappy live shows!"

Gail

I used to think you were a nice lady.

[Gail Simone]

I'm very nice, ask my MOM!

Gail

[Trey Krimsin]

I spent my time in the Kiss Army but I have to say -- I've turned in my dog tags. They're just embarrasing now and I don't see how anyone can think otherwise. No, the music wasn't ever good but it was, for me, charming enough. I think Paul's songs especially can be pretty fun three chord rockers -- when he's not writing lyrics like 'UH! All Night.'

But after the rush of the reunion tour they made the colossal error of a) keeping it going and b) letting Gene speak. They should've gone home when they were on top and had nostalgia on their side. Now they're just old and fat and tired and they've rolled out the same awful show four or five times too many. They've tuned the songs as low as they can be tuned, they've slowed the tempos as low as they can go, they've trimmed the show as short as it can be and still not completely piss everyone off -- they're running on nothing but hot air, they're out of ideas and let's be honest, their famed show became SOP in the eighties and who hasn't seen it a million times already? The 'Psycho Circus' innovations were awful in ways I could barely describe and as they pulled more and more of them back the longer the tour whined on, it was obvious that the band knew it.

Now all they are is Gene endlessly gloating about how much he's willing to wring every last dollar out of anyone stupid enough to still be interested in them.

Gail's right -- you don't even need KISS to do a KISS show, which is probably why all the cover bands are so successful, they can do a KISS show but they're not fat and fifty-some years old and they have energy and a real interest in performing the music and doing the show.

KISS would be wise to hire an Official Kiss cover band and let them be KISS. Because the old dogs are long out of new tricks.

I agree with most of what you say. Gene's greed shows in every ounce of merchandise, TV show, or magazine. He's helped kill what interest I had in this band.

Here's an interesting question: What bands do you still like, but hate certain members of the band?

My responses: Kiss and The Eagles

[CaptMagellan]

I'm very nice, ask my MOM!

Gail

Why? Is she going to be at the KISS concert? :p

[Cam63]

I'm very nice, ask my MOM!

Gail

Seeing how you're asking, your mom sold you up the river !

[PatrickG]

Yes, but see...Kiss themselves don't even NEED to be at a Kiss show for it to be a spectacle. I don't listen to music thinking, "man, I bet they have neato fire effects at their crappy live shows!"

Gail

I've always wondered why Britney Spears didn't just strip tease to instrumental videos.

I mean, her voice was actually holding her career as an MTV exotic dancer back.

Meanwhile, Christina Aguilera has a fantastic voice but her appearance just freaks me out.

Clear Channel's mad scientists should splice them together and hire the KISS pyrotechnic team.

[Cam63]

I've always wondered why Britney Spears didn't just strip tease to instrumental videos.

I mean, her voice was actually holding her career as an MTV exotic dancer back.

I knew there was something she may actually be good/adequate at.

Nah, I think she should just retire from show biz to concentrate on raising her two dependants.