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damion_gringe
09-02-2005, 12:59 PM
well ive been tealling this story in the chat rooms for awhile know. and here it is


Dur critezsim..

[11:33 AM] damion_gringe: ........ yea well pay day has nuts AND carmel so i win. ha
[11:32 AM] Brian Cronin: you would have to first determine whether you felt like a nut, or not
[11:32 AM] Brian Cronin: so how would you determine which one you would want to purchase, on any given occassion?
[11:31 AM] Brian Cronin: because almond joy has nuts, and mounds does not
[11:30 AM] damion_gringe: why?
[11:30 AM] Brian Cronin: and sometimes, not
[11:30 AM] Brian Cronin: you should feel like a nut

Ronald Bryan: You're crazy damion.
PM] The Cure: this is the most badass story ever damion. EPIC.
[06:57 PM] The Cure:
Ronald Bryan: Smoog, help!
Sweet

[07:56 PM] damion_gringe: so then they gave me the bean and i called him larry
[07:56 PM] Ronald Bryan: But Snow Sabre doesn't have a chance.
[07:56 PM] Ronald Bryan: PUMPED!
[07:55 PM] The Cure: this shit is amazing, everyone get pumped.
[07:55 PM] damion_gringe: so they extracted the bean by cautherizing my anal tube due to seepage
[07:55 PM] The Cure: I'm so pumped about this again.
[07:55 PM] The Cure: dude isn't this the start of the story?
[07:55 PM] Stony: I like this story already
[08:21 PM] The Cure: that's what he's on about.
[08:21 PM] The Cure: damion is on about the best story ever.
[08:21 PM] morna: ok I'm waaay too far out of the loop





Stony: damn, one day we'll get that cap america for good...

The Cure: OH SHIT!
[08:06 PM] damion_gringe: THEY ATTACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[08:24 PM] morna: sorry yes we ate
[08:24 PM] The Cure: damion. holy shit.



im afraid of beans


shall i continue the story of my fear of beans?

well heres how it goes cus when i was 4 i put one in my nose and then i had to go to the emergency room and the nurse was naked

so they extracted the bean by cautherizing my anal tube due to seepage

she was naked cus of serpantor

so then they gave me the bean and i called him larry


so but then cobra commander in his helmet cus the mask wuz coverd in dip came and said something

he kept sayin stuff and then the docter said the larry had anal cancer so they had to amputate my toe to creat a new face but it went horribly wrong when i truck full of chemical waste crashed and melted his flesh woooooh

so then larry went to the general store to by horses cus it was like that but then lois lane leaped at him from the shadows and forced poor larry to eat his sons who he was pregnant with..

so then larry projectile vomited his children ALLL over lois lane wo ran crying back to hel

so then karl rupert kronen stabbed larry just like he stabbed Rupert

but larry used his beany ness to deflect the knife!

then mr rodgers came up to karl and larry and taught them the true meaning of hanuka

er chanuka

so then karl larry and mr rodgers united TO CONQUER THE WORLD!!!!!

WITH monkeys with rocket launchers and the people of make belive and a clown with no head

SO THEN mr bean and karl TURNED on mr rodgers who had become drunk with power and the blood of childre.

as the blood pured from mr rogers he swor erevenge on the bean.. who snickered at his doings

karl and the bean realized thAT the partner ship waz terminated and decided to duel.. with flounder

at the crack of dawn seaun connorey greated the contenders with a witty joke about slapping the granny

AS the smoke ROSE from the battle feield connery called the victor. larry had triumphed over the drkness and calypso was ready to give him his prize

larry said he wanted to know the truth was he truley jesus?

calypso told him to find out for himself and then was emidiatly stricken down by uma thurman and jhonny mo


so larry "walked the earth " for thousands of years before being imprisond in ice

so then his giant ice cube collided with captian americas " yeh kool sti kcab sdorws"
he said as the ice melted

so captian ameica breacks free!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "ym ckoc struh"

larry and captian america have a titanic battle

that ends with larry becoming pregant with marry jane's babey

upon hearing this ben grim throws larry a wedding shower
\
larry arrived to find the place empty but little did he now that monica and phebe were hidin behind an artifical plum


THEY ATTACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But larry is to quick fo them using his beanish might he lobs both there heads of using his flying guiliten

as there limp bodies fell to the floor the revenge theme plays and larry eyes down oren ishii from across the hall as the patrons of the house of blue leaves flee.

larry advance's

..... KRKWAOAOA

a massive sword fight ensue's

and going

and you guessed it...going

mr. beef had just woken up he was a hobob mind you bad a damn good one at that

während Herr beef aufwachte, sagte er, daß "alles OH- mein Bumsen dieses ist im deutschen!!!!! heiliger Scheißemann!'

larry continued advancing on oren ishii when they turned into... CHIBI'S!!!!!!

And then every one went awww but then mr beef came.."hallo oren ishhi hallo jhonny MO, wie yo- OH- mein Gott HEILIGES BUMSEN sind, WAS DIE HÖLLE eine BOHNE MIT einer KLINGE UND DIESES OH- MEIN GOTT SOPHIE IST, WAS SIE ERFOLGTER ANRUF-SCHEIN-ANRUF-SCHEIN-ANRUF-SCHEIN-ANRUF-SCHEIN-KRANKE HABEN, IHNEN BEATRIX KIDDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ZU ERHALTEN

as the smoke cleared chandler aproched larry. " h-hey gys.. er... wuzzupo"

mr beef began to bleed out.. HOLY SHIT MY ANAL MEATS THEMES AM JUCIEy!!!!!!!!!!!!! like fruit said bill

Herr beef fing an, heraus zu bluten. HEILIGE SCHEISSE MEIN ANALES FLEISCH-THEMEN Morgens JUCIEy!!!!!!!!!!!!! wie die gesagte Frucht billsure werde ich die vollen 33 nennen ass " but little did timmy now that larry had implanted himself in lassies brain and was contolling her through.. amnjigona


End of chapter 1



cHapt 2

It was the time of the bean.


Well not really but…


Larry was on to the beach as he stuck hi shead out the car he was SUCKED OUT WHOOSHSHSSHSHSHSHHSSHSHHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSSHSHSHSHH SHSHSSSSSSSSS

Larry found him self in Fargo north Dakota. “mmmmmm” he struggled “ii- am” he continued to struggle he had never spoken before “i---am---bean….” He collapsed and vomited blood from his rectum.

He awoke in a giant toileight wihich said. “padme greatigns ahh как вы сегодня? хорошо жить? оно для меня да? в советском dri- ar России ЕСЛИ ВЫ ЧИТАЕТЕ ЭТО. ВЫ КАК РАЗ БЫЛИ СВЯЗАНЫ NSA ПОЖАЛУЙСТА PROCED ДЛЯ ТОГО ЧТОБЫ УПАСТЬ TROUE И ПОЛОЖИТЬ ВЫ ПЕНИС НА ВЕРХНЮЮ ЧАСТЬ ВНАПУСКА ДЛЯ ТЕРМАЛЬНО ВООБРАЖЕНИ”

http://dictionary.reference.com/translate/text.html
as mt bean stared at the Russian tolight he struggled to speak again “h-h-h-h” he vomited blood again and fell into the tolight/ “святейшее!!!!!!!!! fuck говоря фасоль!!! thats шальные!!!”


As amazo sat in his seat drinking mountain dew code yellow he realized his life was meaning less. So he devoured himself.
As the ugly duckling emerged from the cocun it was trapped in and swore revenge on the world that shunned him he would become DR. QUACK!!!!!!!!!!! Master of the mystic arts.. spooooky

Larry found a penny. It embedded itself in his urethra “whoa nelly what a fat cow!!! Fatty fatty fatty fatty” he said


Fatty

Fatty

Fatty
Lol
Lo
L
I
AS dawn broke over the lollie pop village no crows sounded no church bells sounded only the “CRAW CRAW” of the birds of carrion. For the townsfolk in there entirety had been slaughtered only the previous day. By the roving horde. Billy stared out the window through his one good eye, his legs were gone. Ripped of by a heavy blaster his parents were not so lucky. Nor his friends nor his neighbors. Billy layed there for day’s until his hunger got the better of him. He saw the candy shop across the street in the window more food the imaginable he would be happy for ever. He went to get up only to fall back down his legs were stumps he cried and cried but prevailed. He crawled on his hands dragging his fat Swedish body as far s he could. For hours he crawled and struggled he felt like giving uo but he kept on going. Then finally FINALLY he reached the door and hoisted himself up he went to turn the knob. He was finally happy. Heturned and turned but nothing happened the. Door.. was…locked!!!!!!! He slid down and screamed. He was answered by the mocking cry’s of the birds of prey flying over his head. Waiting.

And waiting
For him to die.

And he did

Chapt three

A D
09-02-2005, 01:46 PM
Best is a relative term, and in this case very relative.

Dee3
09-03-2005, 12:24 AM
As I said in my e-mail to you you need to work on your discriptions,flow as well as a few other things.


an example.

She sat alone in the darkness, the wind from the moors whipped around her like a cold blanket,she paid no heed to it nor did she really care anymore. The world she had known was gone and her she was in this strange place that she had no understanding of. everyone whom she had known and loved were long since dead and relagated to the dusty pages of human kinds history books

edit perhaps that was a little bad of me.

Dee3
09-03-2005, 01:50 PM
1199 CE

The lionheart was dead, All the land was in mourning,
Juila sat alone on the cold stone floor of the castle torrent,the darkness surrouned her,she was used to it,her kind were the creatures of the night. the breeze from the west blew her hair acoss her face,she reached up and moved the errent strands behind her ear. She wished that she had braded it ealier in the evening, it cascaded in long black waves about her.
Hearing the rusle of feet on stone she looked up.
" Good evening Robert"
"Good evening, Julia"
Juila looked him in the eyes " What are you doing up at such a late hour as this? Why arn't you in bed with Marion?"
Sir Robert of Locksley the earl of huntigton slid down and sat beside his longtime friend and war buddie."
"Couldn't sleep" Julia smirked and snorted.
"I thought after *that* you'd sleep like the dead."
"You heard" Julia laughed
"The whole castle heard, it was enough to wake the dead." Waving a talon in front of her " John and Will kept commenting on your prowess."

hopefully this shows a good dialogue and I hope it helps you.