J-Bolt News

[founder81]

C'mon founder you must have seen this pic of ol J-bolt
http://img64.photobucket.com/albums/v194/schoo/J-BoltClr.jpg

I've been savin up for the 1989.95 autographed cover he's sellin on 1st edition comics....

I seen that picture, but figured that's not a real guy. At least not a real guy today, during the 80's yes, today, god I hope not.

[Cream Filled Taco]

Monkey Spit! has your J-Bolt update right here folks! Lots of new stuff from "Heather", so have a look. For easy searching for Bolt's newest entries, search for Jun 25.

http://www.monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt

One fun extra has him comparing buying shipping insurance to choosing paper vs. plastic at the grocery store, and then relates it to shampoo!

[founder81]

thanks Cream Filled taco, you're made my day.

we do expect for customers to purchase insurance and/or some form of delivery tracking number

Any good business does not expect that

If we were to take on your idea of business and give another order to everyone who says they didn't receive their order, we'd go out of business because every person who lies, wanting something for nothing, would tell us that their package never arrived, so we'd have to send them more.

So this is common for LBC huh?

You can deny that all you want, but we all know it to be true from experience. In that regard, the customer is NOT always right. If given a chance, the customer will ALWAYS try to get something for free.

damn them customers, just damn them all, things were much better before these pesky customers showed up

The entire bash forum knows that we've had an ever-growing customer base for quite some time. Otherwise, we would not have spent THOUSANDS of dollars maintaining a website for the years we have.


I really didn't know a Collecovision cost that much. Wow.

We've never gotten ANY other complaints from ANY OTHER customer.

Not good contradicting yourself in the same paragraph. (See second quote)

these friends don't even bother to respond to the "MacQuarrie exposed" string of posts

Beacuse they've all been banned. This one has me tempted to go there. (I need something to do at work today)

Common J-bolt more more more I need my entertainment today

[Dom]

I don't know if this has been posted yet, (17 pages and I've only just now learned J Bolt existed)

BombShell 2005 (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0282390/combined)

[Cream Filled Taco]

I don't know if this has been posted yet, (17 pages and I've only just now learned J Bolt existed)

BombShell 2005 (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0282390/combined)

Yep, good old J-Bolt put that up himself.

[MacQuarrie]

There's a post on the LBC forum where the Heather puppet makes a snide crack about me supposedly claiming to have a lot of money. I can't post there (my anonymizer will let me read, but it screws up the post function), so could somebody please tell "her" this:

I never said I had any money at all. In fact, the disclaimer at the bottom of every page of Monkey Spit says precisely the opposite. I have no money, and make no bones about it. What I do have is friends who are attorneys, clients who have a lot of resources, and very clever friends. There is a letter on the way to J-Bolt's mail-drop address from one of my attorney friends. Now that I have Jim Fisher's home address (thanks, Leroy!), another copy of the letter will be sent there as well. The money I paid for the posters is trivial. I don't need the $20, and I'm not fighting about the money. I'm fighting over the fact that J-Bolt has on multiple occasions accused me of lying about this. He has said that I received the merchandise and am trying to smear him. This is not true. I was totally upfront with him when I ordered the posters: I was buying him off. I ordered and paid for them as a show of good faith in order to interview him for Monkey Spit, knowing that he would make a complete fool of himself and provide a hilarious feature for us. After I sent the money and provided the mailing tube, he vanished for three months, only to return full of hostility and insults. If I were a vindictive sort, I would, upon receiving the posters, return them to him for the full refund promised in the original auction. I'm not going to do that. Right now, this whole exchange is nothing but entertainment. J-Bolt is more fun than a schoolbus full of nigerian scammers. He speaks worse english, for one, and his lies are even more transparent. If I can't get my money back, kicking him around on his message board is pretty good compensation, and I intend to keep it up until he retracts, apologizes, and sends either the posters or the money. Enjoy the show, folks!

[founder81]

a schoolbus full of nigerian scammers

Well, that answers who are funding Bombshell the Movie

[Crowley]

Rena not playing BombShell...
by - j-bolt (Mon Jan 12 11:06:08) Ignore this User | Report Abuse


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After discussions and other obligations, it's apparently a sad fact that Rena Mero will not be donning the costume to play the "Gorgeous Psychotic," but we're in negotiations with another top actress to be BombShell. As soon as we hear back from her and her agent, we're going to be updating that role on imdb and letting everyone else know, here, while that update is taking place.
J-Bolt
Rena not playing BombShell...
by - j-bolt (Mon Jan 12 11:07:26) Ignore this User | Report Abuse


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Apparently Rena has gone back full time to being Sable for the WWE and that's why she regrettably can't take the role. Apparently, Vince won't allow it.
J-Bolt
Rena not playing BombShell...
by - j-bolt (Tue Jan 13 14:21:40) Ignore this User | Report Abuse


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Immediately after the offer was made, the agent of the actress who we want to replace Rena called me back and asked me for a script, knowing of and loving the project. Within the next few weeks, after she has read the script and signed the necessary papers, we will be publicly announcing who will be playing BombShell along with updating the imdb listing.
Just to let everyone know...this actress is a bigger star than Rena has been known to be. We're sure that EVERY fan of this project will be quite happy with our choice, once she completely accepts the role.
Rena not playing BombShell...
by - Tenacious-H (Wed Feb 4 18:08:08) Ignore this User | Report Abuse


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Don't sweat it -- I worked with Rena on a feature project in 1998, and it's no big loss. Both her agent from W-M and her husband are major pains, and she added little to the overall Q factor for your film. If you want to talk to me about that project, just reply to this message, and I will send you my e-mail address.
Rena not playing BombShell...
by - j-bolt (Mon Feb 9 19:35:54) Ignore this User | Report Abuse


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'd definitely like to hear more.
J-Bolt
President/CEO
Lightning Bolt Entertainment family of companies
Rena not playing BombShell...
by - xc1229-1 (Sat Feb 14 09:08:26) Ignore this User | Report Abuse


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Bigger Actress than Rena Mero"

Why does that just SCREAM Pamela Anderson?

You know, it it is her that's getting the part to play BombShell, I assure you and anyone else working on this project, you won't be getting my money for a ticket to see this film.

I learned from past mistakes- AKA "Barb Wire". So yeah... Pam=In, I=Out.

Look forward to seeing more news on this.

-MJ-
Rena not playing BombShell...
by - j-bolt (Sat Feb 14 12:41:24) Ignore this User | Report Abuse


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I can personally guarantee that Pamela Anderson has not and will not ever be part of that equation. The one who will be fitting the costume is much more well-known and talentented than she ever could be for this role. We're just not yet at liberty to give that name yet. You won't be disapponted, when we do, though.
J-Bolt
President/CEO
Lightning Bolt Entertainment family of companies


*throws arms into the air*

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!

[Cam63]

So, where in this universe is Rena a " top actress ? "

[Brandon Peterson]

Hi all,

Saw this post on the Monkeyspit forum from a Guest:

------------------------------------------------------------
Posted: Sat Jun 26, 2004 3:38 am Post subject: "J-Bolt" longtime poster under name "Omar"

Hi all,

First a bit of a story.

I was reading the newsarama.com thread about Jason Pearson's "return" to comics at http://newsarama.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=14689 and came upon this quote from OMAR in the discussion:

"Pearson was one of J-Bolt's more promising students, as I recall. But it seems that for all he learned from J-Bolt re:anatomy and composition, he could use some of his teacher's work ethic as well. So for him to talk of epic runs seems a bit strange."

I stopped for a minute, very confused. OMAR is one of the hugest trolls on the newsarama.com message boards, a big mainstream comics news site. He is an obnoxious poster, known for trashing many things, especially a company called Crossgen comics, and generally being a huge jerk. Who the hell is "J-Bolt"? I've been a fan of Jason's work and a pretty big comics reader for over a dozen years, and I never heard of "J-Bolt". Thinking I must have missed something big, I searched on yahoo the terms "J-Bolt" and "Comics" and found the rant on this site. Reading it, and checking the links, the bizarre story seemed to unfold even more. It seems that this fella has another secret ID. Check out the posts OMAR's made and you'll see the bizarre bravado of "J-Bolt" through it all at http://newsarama.com/forums/search.php?s=&action=showresults&searchid=139922

Why do I think "J-Bolt" and "Omar" and the same? First of all, the reference to Jason Pearson. Only "J-Bolt" has ever made any reference to his association to Jason Pearson. Reading your rant, apparently Jason Pearson was unlucky enough to meet up with "J-Bolt" early in his career at some school in Nevada, and has had to live with this guy making a big deal of it ever since.

"Pearson was one of J-Bolt's more promising students, as I recall." How could you recall a teacher-student relationship unless you were the teacher or a student?

"But it seems that for all he learned from J-Bolt re:anatomy and composition..." Jason LEARNED his skills from "J-Bolt"? My impression is that Jason is artistically quite far ahead of the supposed teacher, and I would suspect the supposed teacher is the only human being on Earth who would see it differently.

"...he could use some of his teacher's work ethic as well." What? Has J-Bolt EVER published a book? Jason has been published for over a dozen years. Why would anyone consider NEVER publishing a book to be something a published creator should aspire to? That statement can only have come from "J-Bolt".

Thank you for the great expose on "J-Bolt", and allowing me to see the true, deranged identity of the troll OMAR on the newsarama.com boards. I will get a little smile knowing his "secret ID" from now on when he posts some bitter drivel on the newsarama.com boards.


------------------------------------------------------------
Posted: Sat Jun 26, 2004 6:21 am Post subject:

Neat. And this "OMAR" fellow appears to be the same as the Comicon.com poster "ericomaraltice." As for a couple of good excerpts:

http://www.comicon.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic&f=1&t=010233
ERA getting up in the face of Peter David (some of his rants have a familiar ring)

http://www.comicon.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic&f=1&t=009914
Some very funny, and likely accurate, theories on ERA about 1/3 down the page.

Loren

------------------------------------------------------------

OK, so this all starts to make sense. Anyone who goes on those boards (comicon and newsarama) knows OMAR or ericomaraltice. He's a troll with delusions of greatness (sound like anyone we know?) This "Jason Pearson" connection between J-Bolt and OMAR/eric seems to ring real true. I've known Jason Pearson for a long time, and I've been a pro for years, and never once has "J-Bolt" come up. Jason is from Nevada, but he moved in the very early 90's to Atlanta to join up with Gaijin, where he seemed to really learn and grow initially. Could it be that there is one troll/maniac on all the comic boards, and he is:

J-BOLT/OMAR/WHATEVER

Think of it. All day long he sits and types rants and idiocy on the internet under various guises. That's why he doesn't have time to make comics/movies/whatever!

Anyway, my mind is boggling. The truth is out there!

Brandon Peterson

[Gail Simone]

Dear Brandon,

Welcome and thank you for scaring the pee out of me.

:)

Gail

[Gail Simone]

I believe it's been established that Jason did take the class, but also that he was so vastly superior in talent and knowledge that it was pretty pointless.

Omar and J-Bolt.

Wow.

Gail

[kingdom2000]

Sheesh comic folk*are late night people!

Hmm now me thinks i need to read this thread...i have been ignoring it till now cause thought j-bolt was some comic book i had never heard of.

Also..just a thought...but if comic folk know a troll by name...doesn't that just encourage them more?


* folk should be the official short hand for artists, writers, inkers, editors, etc. Group em all together to cut out the confusion :P

[kingdom2000]

Finally read through the entire thread...my eyes hurt. Was going to go to the j-bolt forums and read stuff but don't really see the point. Now stupid question...why all the dislike of this guy? Seems like in his own little world to me...or does he keep leaving his world and bugging people elsewhere? Not sure of the history of this guy as only thing i have seen is his silly site and that poster story thingie...neither of which seem of enough importance to make him so infamous.

[Crowley]

so J-Dolt is Omar and Jim Miller?

wow and some people got pissed because I had an online alias when i first went on a former MB I frequented.

[Locke]

If This J-Bolt character has a "family of companys" or whatever :confused: , why doesn't he send more of the posters. As a show of good faith, most reputable companys will take your word for it and send you the promised goods to show you how excelent their sevice is. They also do this to avoid situations like this (a public bashing of their goods and services). Unless they are a very limited edition (I believe said price was $20 for 4 doubtful). Why doesn't he just send more? If hes got an axe to grind "get over it J-Bolt" THIS public bashing of his obvously inferior product (I've been to his web site, looks like early-mid ninetys Marvel/Image books) is hurting his buisness and reputation. If indeed either exsist anywhere other than the web.


I'm realtivly new to this forum, but this has to be a hoax,ala; Andy Kauffman. It's funny as hell but how can one person be so delusional. :D

I apologise for the poor spelling and if I'm not making any sence, I'm so... very tired.

[Cream Filled Taco]

Finally read through the entire thread...my eyes hurt. Was going to go to the j-bolt forums and read stuff but don't really see the point. Now stupid question...why all the dislike of this guy? Seems like in his own little world to me...or does he keep leaving his world and bugging people elsewhere? Not sure of the history of this guy as only thing i have seen is his silly site and that poster story thingie...neither of which seem of enough importance to make him so infamous.

Setting aside the complete hype machine and bullcrap artist that he is, he has tried to get money from people for these various vapor products. When he has gotten money, he doesn't deliver product. He has also been accused of not paying for work done for him. He's held Ebay auctions for many thousands of dollars for a stake in his movie that will never get made, starring actors nobody would be interested in seeing. He tries to convice people he's the president of a medium sized company, when he is really running it all by himself. He does all this to make himself look important, in the hopes people will fund his movie and comics.

It would be perfectly fine if he stayed in his little world, but the fact that he tries to trick people into giving him vast amounts of cash is where most of us feel we need to keep an eye on him.

[Cream Filled Taco]

I'm realtivly new to this forum, but this has to be a hoax,ala; Andy Kauffman. It's funny as hell but how can one person be so delusional.


See, I thought he was a hoax once too. But then he started his auctions for funding his movie, and didn't pay for the posters MacQ bought. In my mind, he's either the world's worst scam artist, or he's crazy. Maybe a mix of the two.

[Cream Filled Taco]

Well, J-Bolt has posted his daily updates and deletions. New additions can be found here by searching on "Jun 26": www.monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt

Also, here's a listing of today's deletions:

Subject: Re: Friendship
Name: Leroy
Date Posted: Jun 25, 04 - 10:49 AM
Message:
It could be that you've banned anyone who defends him. It

could be that they're all laughing too hard at your absurd

post, laughing that you still believe there is anyone on

Earth who can't tell that Heather is J-Bolt. It could be

that he doesn't need defending; your comments are all the

defense he needs.

-----------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Re: MacQuarrie disguised
Name: Leroy
Date Posted: Jun 25, 04 - 1:20 PM
Message:
That's very funny for many reasons.

1. He had you completely fooled until he screwed up and

outed himself.

2. He hit on Heather knowing "she" is really J-Bolt in

disguise (come on, is ANYBODY fooled?).

3. If he hadn't forgotten to change his "from" settings,you

would have written a really funny response which he could

them post on his page about you. Unintentionally funny, of

course.

4. "NOT A CHANCE IN HADES" is a really lame response.

You know, you could have had so much fun with this, but you

totally missed the chance. You could have pretended not to

know that GeekFest was really MacQ and replied to his e-mail

in any number of fun ways. The you could have posted the

conversation here and we could have all had a good laugh.

-----------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:

Members' Section Problems
Name: Jamal
Date Posted: Jun 25, 04 - 8:05 AM
Message:
Holy crap. No seriously holy crap. If these are your ideas

of customer service and business practices then you are in

serious trouble. You made NO offer or suggestion to the

customer that insurance was a good idea, you did not offer

it on your ebay sale, they sent you their money in good

faith, and you expected them to include extra money at no

prompting to pay for insurance through the USPS which is

worthless anyone? You folks are out of touch with reality.

ANd if you are paying "THOUSANDS of dollars" for this board

and that other crappy website you guys are getting ripped

off by someone big time. Seriously, get your money back or

fire whoever is charging you that much. I work in the web

hosting/design business and I can tell you you are NOT

getting your moneys worth.

-----------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:

Members' Section Problems
Name: Leroy
Date Posted: Jun 25, 04 - 1:51 PM
Message:
"The statement: "But to date we know of ONE person that has

purchased something from you" is EXTREMELY insulting and

knowingly not true. The entire bash forum knows that we've

had an ever-growing customer base for quite some time."

1. Your store was completely off-line for over a year. No

customers could possibly have puchased anything from you.

2. Your e-bay auction made it clear that you have at least

1000 posters on hand,
and you only received 3 bids on them, 2 from MacQ and 1 from

another YABS person. I'll bet the print run of the posters

was only 1000, and MacQ is the first and only paying

customer for them.

3. Apart from the posters, you have nothing else to sell

them. No comics. No games. No movie. Just a lot of hot air

about all the stuff you're going to do. Now that ballooning

is not as popular, there isn't really a market for hot air.

You do not have a customer base at all. MacQ IS your

customer base. Prove me wrong. Let's see the stats from your

CafePress sales.

"Otherwise, we would not have spent THOUSANDS of dollars

maintaining a website for the years we have."

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

You have not spent thousands maintaining this website. If

you had, your links would be active, you would not be using

this gawdaful Bravenet message board, and your site wouldn't

look so hideous. Any web designer worth a dime would have

talked you out of the white text on black, would have

created some navigation that works and would have convinced

you not to put that stupid sound effect on the second page.

Your site is hosted by GoDaddy, which has plans as low as

$3.95 a month. The forum has pop-up ads for PowWeb, which

charges $7.77 a month. Since all your traffic is coming from

CBR, you're not incurring high bandwidth charges. (Go to

google, type in Link:www.lightning-bolt-comics.com; there

are only 5 sites linking to you, the top one being MacQ's

page. Face it, if it weren't for him, you would have NO

traffic at all.) You're obviously doing the design and web

work yourself using Microsoft FrontPage Express 2.0. So your

total expense for the last 4 years is is somewhere between

$48 and $120 a year, or $192 to $480. Not thousands.

If you spent THOUSANDS on this mess, you were robbed.

-----------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Re: not really convincing
Name: Sir Tim Drake
Date Posted: Jun 25, 04 - 4:03 PM
Message:
Hi, my name (well, my Internet name anyway) is Sir Tim

Drake. I'm a CBR moderator and a longtime friend of

MacQuarrie's. I say this in the interest of full disclosure.

Despite being a member of one of the so-called "bash

forums," I haven't involved myself in any previous

J-Bolt-bashing thread, and indeed have had trouble

understanding what all the fuss was about.

However, after reading the last few days' worth of postings

on this forum, I begin to understand why there's so much

negativity toward J-Bolt and his company.

Let's look at the previous post as an example. You didn't

specifically answer any of KCarroll's comments, but instead

provided a numbered list of seven unwarranted one-sentence

"arguments." (Well, #4 was two sentences.) Some of these

arguments are plainly false; for example, you say that there

are "comics" (plural) to view, but all I see is one ashcan

that contains only three or four pages of actual comics. You

also say that you always keep your promises, but provide no

examples of promises you've actually kept. You declined to

answer KCarroll's question about when new online comics

would be available. Perhaps most troubling of all is the

general tone of your post. KCarroll is a prospective

customer who seems to be demonstrating a genuine interest in

your product, but based on your use of negative smilies and

your refusal to say more on the matter, I get the feeling

that you're dismissing his concerns rather than trying to

convince him further.

Posts like this one, as well as your reaction to

MacQuarrie's issue with the posters, indicate that your

company does not truly care about its customers.

-----------------------------------------------------
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:

Re: Dude....
Name: Leroy
Date Posted: Jun 25, 04 - 4:20 PM
Message:
"This company is a far cry from being a "one man operation."

We're really tired of sounding like a broken record on that

subject, as well."

Oh really?

Then please explain this mystery for me... If I go to

www.networksolutions.com, click on the whois link, and

search for registration information for

lightning-bolt-comics.com, the information displayed is as

follows (I deleted the actual address and phone

information):

Registrant
J-Bolt
(e-mail)
(address)
(phone number)
(fax number) (FAX)

Administrative
J-Bolt
(e-mail)
(address)
(phone number)
(fax number) (FAX)

Billing
J-Bolt
(e-mail)
(address)
(phone number)
(fax number) (FAX)

Technical
J-Bolt
(e-mail)
(address)
(phone number)
(fax number) (FAX)

All of these addresses and phone numbers are identical.

Then, going to www.switchboard.com and clicking on "Search

by phone" and entering the phone number, a residential

listing is returned. The listing is for a Jim Fisher,

probably the same Jim Fisher who once interviewed J-Bolt.

Now tell me again that you aren't a one man operation.

-----------------------------------------------------

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:

Re: Re: Dude....
Name: Leroy
Date Posted: Jun 25, 04 - 4:33 PM
Message:
Another mystery:

Neither switchboard.com nor intelius.com has any listings

for a Heather Andes in Nevada.

Google is similarly unhelpful, unless Heather happens to be

a high school soccer player in New Jersey or a college

biology major from Maryland. Maybe a Lexis-Nexus search

would yield some results, but so far it seems Heather is a

construct.

[Justin D.]

Seriously, does anyone else think he isn't trying to purposely fool people anymore, but might seriously have some split personality disorder? He may really think all these personalities are different people.

[Crowley]

i was banned from LBC!

*little piece of me dies*

[MacQuarrie]

I'll have to pop by my other location and see if Leroy is banned yet.

Now that we know J-Bolt's Newsarama IDs, there might be some real fun to be had....

[Loren]

Has anyone else ever shared the small print on J-Bolt's "Win a Lifetime Income" page of his ashcan? I just saw it, and I found this funny:

Third place winner: James Buchanan
(won a 5-year subscription of When Lightning Strikes)
and all 100 runner-up winners that will each receive
a 1-year subscription to When Lightning Strikes

I feel sorry for all those kids who won subscriptions to a comic that has never come out. That is, I would feel sorry for them if I actually thought 100 people entered his contest. The winning entry doesn't exactly scream 'stiff competition.'

Loren

[OzBat!]

That five-year subscription has got to have just about run out by now, hasn't it?

[OzBat!]

Well, damn! It looks like J-Bolts' http://www.lightning-bolt-comics.com/ website is gone again! Getting the BIG ol' "Oops! page not found" error message from secureserver.net... Thousands of dollars of mainframe costs evidently don't get you that much of a consistent net presence. I'll bear that in mind should I ever decide to build a mainframe of my very own out of the leftover parts from my Vic20 and SuperNintendo.

But the bravenet forums (http://pub36.bravenet.com/forum/3027534503/) still go on!!

[Cream Filled Taco]

One of the dozens of employees must've forgotten to put quarters into the mainframe again this morning.

[Gail Simone]

Actually this thing Brandon brings up is very interesting.

How in the world would Omar know what Jason 'learned' from J-bolt?

Huh.

Anyway, love the message board stuff, Taco. It's hilarious.

Gail

[Gail Simone]

Don't know...been reading and I don't think Omar is J-bolt. First of all, like him or don't, Omar can write coherently and doesn't use words that don't exist. Secondly, while you can argue with his interpretation, Omar keeps up with what's going on in comics, whereas J-bolt doesn't have a single clue. He didn't know who Warren Ellis was, for example.

But there's something weird there, for sure.

Gail

[JeffreyWKramer]

J-Bolt being Omar really would explain an awful lot...

[Cream Filled Taco]

Don't know...been reading and I don't think Omar is J-bolt. First of all, like him or don't, Omar can write coherently and doesn't use words that don't exist. Secondly, while you can argue with his interpretation, Omar keeps up with what's going on in comics, whereas J-bolt doesn't have a single clue. He didn't know who Warren Ellis was, for example.

But there's something weird there, for sure.

Gail

I tend to agree on the writing patterns and knowledge not matching.

[MacQuarrie]

J-Bolt being Omar really would explain an awful lot...
Okay, Doc, lemme have it. Am I getting irrational with my Javert-like pursuit of J-Bolt? Should I just let him go and eat the $20 as the cost of the entertainment I've received so far?

What do I do about this fantasy I have of appearing at his front doow eith my four largest friends to collect the posters in person? It's only a four-hour drive, and my friends would get a giggle out of scaring the pee out of him, but I think it would be wrong.

What should I do?

[Loren]

"Heather" just took a cleaver to the LBC message board. Whereas the board's post count was in the 140s earlier today, it now stands at 121, so upwards of 20 posts just got culled. I think 27 of the 50 first-page posts are now by J-Bolt/Heather.

Heather's one new post suggests some new content, though:

The LBC White Pages will be our version of a Who's Who in the World of LBC characters, just so you know.

I'll be sure to check it out. Y'know, once the website actually works again.

Loren

[Spike-X]

I'm not a psychologist, but you should totally do that. And get somebody to film it.

[Gail Simone]

Keep it as a fantasy, Mac. Under no circumstances should anyone ever confront this guy, big friends or not.

He's nutty.

Seriously.

Gail

[Spike-X]

Oh yeah, I didn't think of the whole 'unstable lunatic' angle. And I forgot how all you Americans have guns. Yeah, possibly best not to.

[Guapo Méndez]

Third place winner: James Buchanan
(won a 5-year subscription of When Lightning Strikes)
and all 100 runner-up winners that will each receive
a 1-year subscription to When Lightning Strikes

I feel sorry for all those kids who won subscriptions to a comic that has never come out. That is, I would feel sorry for them if I actually thought 100 people entered his contest. The winning entry doesn't exactly scream 'stiff competition.'

Loren

It also screams "James Buchanan Barnes .

Bucky.
Guess now we know what dead Marvel superheroes do in their spare time.

[JeffreyWKramer]

Okay, Doc, lemme have it. Am I getting irrational with my Javert-like pursuit of J-Bolt? Should I just let him go and eat the $20 as the cost of the entertainment I've received so far?

What do I do about this fantasy I have of appearing at his front doow eith my four largest friends to collect the posters in person? It's only a four-hour drive, and my friends would get a giggle out of scaring the pee out of him, but I think it would be wrong.

What should I do?

There's no way, given limited info, for me to predict how he might act if confronted directly. If you have major company, I doubt he'd get dangerous, but it probably wouldn't do much for his already unstable mental status.

I know I can certainly think of lots of things I'd rather do with four hours, personally. Besides, it's likely to be his mom or someone who answers the door.

[Shade]

Besides, it's likely to be his mom or someone who answers the door.

The legendary M-Bolt!

[Cream Filled Taco]

Well folks, J-Bolt went and deleted dozens of posts last night. He probably assigned one post per employee, so they'd have something to do. Most everything related to complaints against him are now gone. However, all bashing of MacQ remains. All new and old messages can be found at www.monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt for your amusement.

[Loren]

OK, so what should we make of this: OMAR replies to Gail (http://newsarama.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&postid=364893#post364893). And it's followed by Gail's response.

It *is* a lot better written than J-Bolt's typical posts. And he uses words like "belittle" in their proper context. Either Jim Fisher intentionally decided to play J-Bolt as a dim bulb and OMAR as a brighter jerk, one who's relatively nice to Gail and one who actively derides her, or else they're not the same guy.

But who else has such a vested interest in defending J-Bolt? "J-Bolt's tremendous contribution to the world of American comics"? "Heather" did post about J-Bolt's connection with Pearson a couple of days before OMAR commented on it (Heather also mentioned a newspaper article; what happened to it?). Maybe OMAR visits here and saw the LBC board.

Loren

[Brandon Peterson]

Omar has disputed that he and J-Bolt are the same person. After my casual analysis of both subject's posts, it appears they are different entities. The grammar used by each is very different, and Omar is undeniably a much better wordsmith.

Omar responds to Gail:
"This is not an entirely accurate picture of J-Bolt's tremendous contribution to the world of American comics, Gail, and I know that you are aware of that. For starters, he has trained many of today's most popular artists (such as Jason Pearson). Also, his work on getting the Major Motion Picture "Bombshell" produced will pay off in a big way as it will most likely send Americans of all ages back into the comic book stores for the first time in many years. You stand to benefit from that, as a hairdresser who has written several mid-tier books in her own right. Some of the people who come looking for comics may pick up Birds of Prey and/or whatever other books you are currently working on. Why put the man down simply because his many duties as a Movie Producer have kept him from the drawing board?!"

Upon reading this, I realize I took Omar's original defense of J-Bolt to be evidence of thier identities being the same. I now see I was wrong, and I must give Omar his due credit. The irony of that paragraph shows me something I never realized about Omar, in that he is an ironic satirist of such a high order so as to seem nearly as delusional as J-Bolt. My hats off to Omar. The written word does not often convey the subtlety of rich sarcasm, and I did not see it in his initial post. Omar has deliberatly set up a point of view so absurd, and focused on the specifically ironic points of J-Bolt's pride, so as to be near a work of art. Omar, I apologize to a true master of wit. Well done, sir. Well done.

Brandon "Humble-Pie" Peterson

[Guapo Méndez]

Omar responds to Gail:
"This is not an entirely accurate picture of J-Bolt's tremendous contribution to the world of American comics, Gail, and I know that you are aware of that. For starters, he has trained many of today's most popular artists (such as Jason Pearson). Also, his work on getting the Major Motion Picture "Bombshell" produced will pay off in a big way as it will most likely send Americans of all ages back into the comic book stores for the first time in many years. You stand to benefit from that, as a hairdresser who has written several mid-tier books in her own right. Some of the people who come looking for comics may pick up Birds of Prey and/or whatever other books you are currently working on. Why put the man down simply because his many duties as a Movie Producer have kept him from the drawing board?!"



If they are not the same person, at least they buy their recreational happy pills from the same dealer.


H. Christ.

Can you imagine if J-Bolt had actually published something? I mean, they worship the ground he walks on over an ashcan an a lot of hot air about a movie. If he had even 4 issues, he'd be revered like a god or something.

[kcarroll]

I'm willing to bet that Omar is doing much the same thing that many of us are doing at J-Bolt's site. "heather" recently posted the question of what types of crossovers we would like to see from Lightningbolt comics. After they removed the post about the fact that none of us have seen any of the characters, some of us decided to play along.

I agree with Brandon. Omar's comments are a bit too effusive to be real, and the text too clear to be J-Bolt. He's just stirring up trouble on Pearson's thread, I would guess. I don't know anything about Omar, but he was referred to as a troll. If he is, this type of comment is probably intended to draw Pearson out. It doesn't look like it worked. It is pretty funny though.

[Dreadstar]

Sounds more like the "stubborn Devil's Advocate" type to me. Takes whatever position ruffles the most feathers, regardless of whether or not he actually believes that position. Thrives on conflict, and the anonymity of internet fuels his boorish behavior beyond anything he'd have the NERVE to do in real life. I'm betting that when it really gets cooking, he gets a boner.

We have a few people like that here at CBR, as well. Only not nearly so trollish, as those don't seem to stay around for long, if you catch my drift.

[Cream Filled Taco]

Your daily "Heather" update can be found here:
www.monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt

Today, J-Bolt blames other people for dragging their heels on the movie production.

[Gail Simone]

The funny thing about Omar is...sometimes he posts a position that might be volatile, but makes perfect sense and is entirely defensible, but he's been so contentious in the past (apparently--I haven't really watched closely enough) that people almost automatically take the other side just to yell at him.


I, too, was thinking Omar must be pulling our leg...either that or he's friends with J-bolt, or something, because otherwise the post makes no sense.

Certainly a fun new wrinkle for J-heads.

Gail

[MacQuarrie]

There's no way, given limited info, for me to predict how he might act if confronted directly. If you have major company, I doubt he'd get dangerous, but it probably wouldn't do much for his already unstable mental status.
I'm not worried about whether he's nuts. We all know that.

I'm worried about whether I'm nuts. Tom says I'm "too obsessed with this loser." I find him amusing, but I wonder if I'm deluding myself when I say I can quit any time I feel like it. It J-Bolt bashing addictive? If so, is it harmful? To me, I mean.

[Patrick Ferguson]

Wow. I just read this entire thread, from beginning to end. No joke.

J-Bolt is . . . hypnotic.

[founder81]

It J-Bolt bashing addictive? If so, is it harmful? To me, I mean.

J-Bolt is not good for anything. Be very very careful, obsessiveness can turn into ungrounded unlimited love.

Heather started out this way. She just wanted her posters and before you knew it....

[Cam63]

Oh yeah, I didn't think of the whole 'unstable lunatic' angle. And I forgot how all you Americans have guns. Yeah, possibly best not to.

Or those human munching dogs that would require a .45 at close range or a trained 20 foot long saltwater croc' to put down.

'Best to be on the safe side.

[Gail Simone]

Omar, apparently you're reading this thread. Welcome, feel free to post whatever you like.

IF you still want to believe J-Bolt's claims, ask him...

After the ashcan and initial comic (When Lightning Strikes #0), did he add a single bit of new content for paying members in the last three years?

Then, do yourself a favor and check out some of the claims he's made, none of which came true. Then see if you still think we're being 'bullies.'

Fair enough?

Gail

[Cream Filled Taco]

Newsflash!

New art will be pencilled and inked by J-Bolt and colored by Jim Fisher according to the new Heather report!

That and other goodness can be found here:
www.monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt

[PatrickG]

Omar is one of John Byrne's most dedicated defenders online. I've never seen him talk about anything other than JB (John Byrne, not J-Bolt) but this is an odd twist. I doubt he's joking.

Hm. This does further the J-Bolt/John Byrne parallel though.

Do you suppose someone (say Byrne, who has pulled high profile pranks in the past) created J-Bolt out of boredom to see who would bite?

[Patrick Ferguson]

No, Byrne isn't this funny. I don't think Mark Twain could have created J-Bolt, to be honest.

[Chuckg]

Omar is one of John Byrne's most dedicated defenders online. I've never seen him talk about anything other than JB (John Byrne, not J-Bolt) but this is an odd twist. I doubt he's joking.

If this is the same Omar who trolls rec.arts.comics.dc.universe, I've seen him talk about things other than John Byrne back in the day.

As the other gentleman said earlier, Omar just lives to figure out which way a group is going, and then troll in the other direction.

[Gail Simone]

That might be true, but it does seem like right now it doesn't matter what Omar says, people jump on him even if what he's saying is a perfectly valid opinion.

At least, that's how it looks to me. As I say, I'm not that great when it comes to remembering things.

Gail

[Gail Simone]

"Newsflash!

New art will be pencilled and inked by J-Bolt and colored by Jim Fisher according to the new Heather report!

That and other goodness can be found here"

AHA!

Now it makes sense...his 'dozens of employees' include all his various personalities!

GENIUS!

Gail

[Chuckg]

That might be true, but it does seem like right now it doesn't matter what Omar says, people jump on him even if what he's saying is a perfectly valid opinion.

At least, that's how it looks to me. As I say, I'm not that great when it comes to remembering things.


True, I do remember about 2 times that Omar was actually saying something sane, but nobody was listening. Thanks to years of effort, pursued with great dedication, Omar now sits in a great many kill filters.

I suppose I shouldn't be quite so hard on Omar, because I personally know how it feels to have people be so busy listening to your reputation that they're not hearing a word you actually said... but, well, it's very very hard to feel sympathy for Omar. Extremely little of my reputation as a rampaging Net lunatic is genuinely earned. Pretty much 99.9+% of Omar's *is*.

[Shade]

Extremely little of my reputation as a rampaging Net lunatic is genuinely earned.

Not to us that went through the Young Justice fun over at Alvaro's. :)
(that little smiley face is to denote I am JOKING! I've never thought you were a "rampaging Net lunatic")

[Chuckg]

Not to us that went through the Young Justice fun over at Alvaro's. :)

*LOL*

So they /are/ still talking about that? Damn, and it's been six years... :)

[Typo Lad]

I missed Chuck.

[Dreadstar]

I missed Chuck.

You need to lead him a bit more.

[kcarroll]

I recently posted this on Mr. Bolt's forum. I hope to get a response.

I have an industry question for J-Bolt. I saw recent news on Newsarama about Kirkman writing Youngblood. In the subsequent thread, there were a lot of negative comments about Liefeld, and the lack of material he has put out in recent years, despite numerous promises.

J-Bolt, do you find people like Liefeld, who continually make promises about new comics but fail to publish, detrimental to what you are trying to do? Does his bad reputation reflect badly on other independent publishers that have always come through on their promises?

There are a lot of independent publishers that have consistently put out quality work, but have maintained some semblance of a schedule. People like Jeff Smith and Dave Sim, and you, of course. Are you frustrated when other creators make claims about a great new series, and then don’t finish it?

I know J-Bolt is very busy hitting deadlines and coming through on promises, but I’d really like his opinion on this.

[MacQuarrie]

Heather IS J-Bolt!

Exhibit A: "I'm pretty sure that J-Bolt will leave the other musics being played backwards left alone. "

[Cam63]

Heather IS J-Bolt!

Exhibit A: "I'm pretty sure that J-Bolt will leave the other musics being played backwards left alone. "

I bet he looks and sounds cute in drag. He'd be obsessive enough to dress up for the part.

That '80s photo shown here a while back is really HIM, isn't it ?

[Loren]

While J-Bolt has been spending valuable time getting the LBC site up and running, it looks like he's made a few tweaks to the Bombshell IMdB page (http://imdb.com/title/tt0282390/) at the same time.

Now missing are the names of Rena Mero, Pat Morita, and Adam West. Jackson Bostwick is also absent from the cast, though he is still listed as a producer.

Who is left on the cast? Just four guys, including J-Bolt and two guys with no movie credits aside from "Bombshell" itself.

And be sure to mark November 22, 2005 (the 42nd anniversary of the Kennedy assassination) on your calendars, because that is the scheduled release date for "Bombshell."

Loren

[Roquefort Raider]

Newsflash!

New art will be pencilled and inked by J-Bolt and colored by Jim Fisher according to the new Heather report!


Oh, good!

And I found the book (http://www.nybooks.com/articles/17015) that inspired the great team of Bolt, Fisher and Heather.
:)


- Ben

There is art everywhere.

[OMAR]

Thank you, Brandon, that was a very classy statement. I liked it because it painted me in a good light!

[JeffreyWKramer]

I'm worried about whether I'm nuts. Tom says I'm "too obsessed with this loser." I find him amusing, but I wonder if I'm deluding myself when I say I can quit any time I feel like it. It J-Bolt bashing addictive? If so, is it harmful? To me, I mean.

I'd say to back away from it. Leave it alone to see if you can't. If you truly can't, then you really do have a problem.

Jim, let's hope you haven't let J-Bolt drive you nuts!

[founder81]

Oh, good!

And I found the book (http://www.nybooks.com/articles/17015) that inspired the great team of Bolt, Fisher and Heather.
:)


- Ben

There is art everywhere.

So is "heather" the right or the left?

[Sheldon]

While J-Bolt has been spending valuable time getting the LBC site up and running, it looks like he's made a few tweaks to the Bombshell IMdB page (http://imdb.com/title/tt0282390/) at the same time.

Now missing are the names of Rena Mero, Pat Morita, and Adam West. Jackson Bostwick is also absent from the cast, though he is still listed as a producer.

Who is left on the cast? Just four guys, including J-Bolt and two guys with no movie credits aside from "Bombshell" itself.

And be sure to mark November 22, 2005 (the 42nd anniversary of the Kennedy assassination) on your calendars, because that is the scheduled release date for "Bombshell."

Loren

I submitted those changes to IMDB. I'm so excited that they changed it!!!!!!!
The reason I cited they remove those names was that they actors were never contacted about the movie!

Awesome!!!!

[founder81]

I submitted those changes to IMDB. I'm so excited that they changed it!!!!!!!
The reason I cited they remove those names was that they actors were never contacted about the movie!

Awesome!!!!

What do yo mean they were never contacted. J-Bolt...Heather made it very clear that J-Bolt said it was all the lawyers fault. Every actor is very hyped about Bombshell the movie.

[Loren]

Posted by Heather:

J-Bolt used Draco and Wolff in the WLS#0 issue, along with Bolt, because those were the 3 most popular LBC characters before BombShell was created. With that in mind, J-Bolt used them in the issue, which started inception in 1992. BombShell was created in 1994 then re-worked and introduced in 1999.

Now I could point out the notion of characters who were the "most popular" *before* their first appearance, or the mangled grammar of "started inception."

But are these dates consistent with old J-Bolt hype? He started #0 twelve years ago? And since no Bombshell issue has ever been printed, where was she introduced in '99?

The LBC website is still down, too.

Loren

[Gail Simone]

J-bolt mentions this whenever he can, the point about when Bolt was created. I believe it's because a character named Bolt appeared in DC comics, and J-Bolt realized he could lose the copyright to the character unless he amended the creation date. It was all over his website for a while.

And I love this quote. These three were the most popular characters HOW? How could anyone even know they exist?

Weird.

Gail

[Typo Lad]

Flashback, 1992

"Hi Gwamma. Wanna see a pictuw I dwew?"

"Sure sweetie."

"It's a woof-man and a vampire. They're cooool. And a girl with boobs like the ones daddy brings home when mommy is away."

"..."

"Which do you like best Gwamma?"

"Oh they're all wonderful dear."

"Thanks gwamma. I wove you."

[Cream Filled Taco]

Your daily J-Bolt update is here!

In today's episode, Heather informs us that Steve Carr is indeed still going to be working for J-Bolt! Woohoo! I bet Steve would be happy to hear that!

The nitty gritty is here: http://www.monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt

[Cream Filled Taco]

These three were the most popular characters HOW?
Gail

J-Bolt, Heather, and Jim Fisher took a vote.

[Gail Simone]

I can't believe someone as talented as Brendan "Nightwing" Hockenberry has posted there!

Gail

[Sir Tim Drake]

J-bolt mentions this whenever he can, the point about when Bolt was created. I believe it's because a character named Bolt appeared in DC comics, and J-Bolt realized he could lose the copyright to the character unless he amended the creation date. It was all over his website for a while.

And I love this quote. These three were the most popular characters HOW? How could anyone even know they exist?

Weird.

Gail

But I thought Bolt was created before 1992. I remember him having an entry in the first series of Who's Who, from 1986 or 1987.

[Gail Simone]

Oh, yeah, there's no doubt that DC's Bolt was around much longer.

Gail

[Cam63]

I have greater faith in the guy who said, " More lifeboats ? Why does the Titanic need lifeboats for, anyway ? "

[MacQuarrie]

J-bolt mentions this whenever he can, the point about when Bolt was created. I believe it's because a character named Bolt appeared in DC comics, and J-Bolt realized he could lose the copyright to the character unless he amended the creation date. It was all over his website for a while.

And I love this quote. These three were the most popular characters HOW? How could anyone even know they exist?

Weird.

Gail
Copyright isn't really an issue; characters from different publishers can have the same name. Copyright law specifically prevents claiming copyright to a title.

The issue here is trademark rights, and first publication has absolutely no bearing on that. The only two things that matter in trademark law are

1. who files for trademark protection first
2. Who can afford more lawyers

J-Bolt is SOL here. First, he hasn't yet filed for the trademark on the Bolt character (or any others) Search for "Bolt" (http://tess2.uspto.gov/bin/showfield?f=toc&state=c4np8n.1.1&p_search=searchss&p_L=50&BackReference=&p_plural=yes&p_s_PARA1=&p_tagrepl%7E%3A=PARA1%24LD&expr=PARA1+AND+PARA2&p_s_PARA2=Bolt&p_tagrepl%7E%3A=PARA2%24COMB&p_op_ALL=AND&a_default=search&a_search=Submit+Query&a_search=Submit+Query) Search for trademarks owned by "Lightning Bolt" (http://tess2.uspto.gov/bin/showfield?f=toc&state=c4np8n.1.1&p_search=searchss&p_L=50&BackReference=&p_plural=yes&p_s_PARA1=&p_tagrepl%7E%3A=PARA1%24LD&expr=PARA1+AND+PARA2&p_s_PARA2=Lightning+Bolt&p_tagrepl%7E%3A=PARA2%24OW&p_op_ALL=AND&a_default=search&a_search=Submit+Query&a_search=Submit+Query)

Aside from that, Every DC (and Marvel) comic carries a notice that all characters appearing in the issue are trademarks of the company. it's a lot easier to get a trademark registered (indicated by the "circle-R" mark) when it has already been published with a trademark notification (the "TM" mark). If DC's Bolt was publsihed first, and is still being published (unlike, say, Dark Horse's "Bombshell" character), then J-Bolt has already lost.

Second, even if he could prove prior claim, DC/Warner can crush him like a grape if Bolt ever became a viable property for them to make a buck off. Their lawyers are not noted for their kind and gentle spirits.

Of course all of this would be a lot more interesting if J-Bolt had the slightest clue what he's talking about.

[Michael P]

If DC's Bolt was publsihed first, and is still being published (unlike, say, Dark Horse's "Bombshell" character), then J-Bolt has already lost.
Um, actually, Bombshell has shown up in both issues of "Spyboy: Final Exam," released May/June of this year.

[Loren]

Speaking of names again, I picked up the first issue of Robert Kirkman's "Capes" yesterday, and the lead hero is named...Bolt. He got superstrength after getting hit by lightning. There's even a bit of dialogue about how he picked the name:

"I wanted to go by 'Black Samson' but apparently there was a member of the Guardians of the Globe with that name. When I was hired on at Capes, they told me the only popular black heroes had lighting names...Storm...Black Lightning...Static Shock...Bolt. Seemed like a good idea at the time."

"What about Blade?"

"The movie wasn't out yet."

Loren

[OzBat!]

Dammit, I thought we had an actual J-Bolt sighting there for a minute... Somebody do something!! I'm dying from the lack of J-Boltnesian Goodness!

[Loren]

Dammit, I thought we had an actual J-Bolt sighting there for a minute... Somebody do something!! I'm dying from the lack of J-Boltnesian Goodness!

Worry no more, there are already a handful of new posts from "Heather" over on the LBC board, the first in 3 days. One of them, "Re: Re: Industry Question," includes the long-awaited copy of J-Bolt's e-mail in response to Ed Weave's Liefeld question.

My favorite line from J-Bolt is this: "I don't set dates on any publishing titles because I know I'm WAY understaffed." This seems at odds with Heather's earlier statement that "We don't have a count of how many employees work for Lightning Bolt Entertainment (though it is probably accurate to assume that it is somewhere in the dozens)."

Apparently, having too many workers to bother to count is still too few to actually produce any product.

Oh, and the LBC website is still down, although Heather said it should've been up late last week. And what exactly are LBC's "subsidiaries"?

Loren

[OzBat!]

That would be the coffee table in the loungeroom, and the bedside table & lamp.

[Typo Lad]

Apparently, having too many workers to bother to count is still too few to actually produce any product.


Pff. I had 97 studio members at one point and knew who each one was, what thier talents were, and where they lived. It's called an Excel spreadsheat "Heather". Learn how to use one.

[Cream Filled Taco]

The long awaited J-Bolt update is here! In today's episode, Heather lets J-Bolt tell us, in his own words, why Image is a failure, and why he won't set dates on completing any comics.

http://monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt

[MacQuarrie]

Um, actually, Bombshell has shown up in both issues of "Spyboy: Final Exam," released May/June of this year.
I did not know that. The US Trademark office lists Dark horse's registration of "Bombshell" as a dead mark.

[Guapo Méndez]

The long awaited J-Bolt update is here! In today's episode, Heather lets J-Bolt tell us, in his own words, why Image is a failure, and why he won't set dates on completing any comics.

http://monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt

He tries desperately to appear as more than a one-man-show, but his posts scream "ONE MAN SHOW". (and Heather, the sock puppet).

[Michael P]

I did not know that. The US Trademark office lists Dark horse's registration of "Bombshell" as a dead mark.
Well, there's pretty much only one Spyboy project a year these days, so she hasn't been consistently appearing. And hell, DH may have just forgot to renew it.

[founder81]

There's only so much of me to go around

WHAT?? No

this just can't be

it just can't

I need you Bolt

I need more of you Bolt

I know. I'll cut you. I'll cut whoever is tying up your time

**breaks down and cries**

[crying hysterically] I only want to love you bolt. I ony want to love you[/crying hysterically]

the poster of this post is not in the best of mental health. It has been too long since the last j-bolt update.

[kcarroll]

It would seem that irony is lost on both J-Bolt and Heather. I have responded to his reply with what I hope will not get me banned:

"I don't set dates on any publishing titles because I know I'm WAY understaffed and barely have enough time to sleep, let alone devote more time in getting the issues/titles done myself."

That seems like a great plan. Not setting deadlines make them much easier to hit. And by saying "coming soon" but never providing a context for what "soon" is means that you can continue to hype products and never deliver but still get indignant when people question your veracity. I know that at this point, I would be very surprised to see any new material, so I think your plan is working brilliantly.

I do have a question though. You say that you have dozens of employees, but J-BOlt is still doing everything himself. How can that be? I am not in the business, but it seems like several one-man operations are able to consistently put out a quality product. How is it possible that LBC, with dozens of employees are unable to produce a single new comic in six months?

And speaking of the employees, has your web-team provided any kind of time frame for the launch of the members' section? or the web-site in general, as that is still down as well?

[Guapo Méndez]

J-Bolt's motto:

"I don't want to be involved in a stupid fight, but I most certainly won't run from a battle."

[Crowley]

we interrupt this thread:

************************************************** *************
just a quick derail:
http://forums.comicbookresources.com/showthread.php?t=4670

this is a product my buddy from the UK is making and it's really worth checking out! I actually got one in the mail last week and it's really cool!
************************************************** *************
we now return you to your regularly scheduled thread...

[Cream Filled Taco]

J-Bolt update time again! Today, J-Bolt mentions that he will go on the offensive against MacQuarrie and his ilk when the time is right.

Details here: http://www.monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt

[Typo Lad]

J-Bolt update time again! Today, J-Bolt mentions that he will go on the offensive against MacQuarrie and his ilk when the time is right.

Details here: http://www.monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt

I don't see it :(

[Sheldon]

neither can I :(

[MacQuarrie]

search for "jul 6" in the text file.

[MacQuarrie]

"In short, until MacQuarrie and the other bashers remove what they've said about him and the LBE family of companies, and discontinue their undeserved campaign against him and LBE, we are going to continue defending ourselves with equal tenacity until the time reaches critical for us to change to the offensive position."

He must have gotten the letter from my attorney.

[MacQuarrie]

we interrupt this thread:

************************************************** *************
just a quick derail:
http://forums.comicbookresources.com/showthread.php?t=4670

this is a product my buddy from the UK is making and it's really worth checking out! I actually got one in the mail last week and it's really cool!
************************************************** *************
we now return you to your regularly scheduled thread...
This is the J-Bolt thread! We don't promote actual products that really exist here! Only vaporware is permitted!

[Crowley]

i just thought that a guy who's creating a real product deserves some attention and that way we can look at his stuff and ignore J-Dolt!

[kcarroll]

"His view is that MacQuarrie and the other bashers continue their one-sided enterage against him and this family of companies"

I do find it upsetting that you and the other bashers would continue the one-sided enterage. There should always be two sides to an enterage, maybe even three or four.

And to enterage (can i use that as a verb?) against a family of companies. for shame. some of those companies are in grade school for God's sake! Have some humanity, you heartless, bashing ilk!

[Loren]

"His view is that MacQuarrie and the other bashers continue their one-sided enterage against him and this family of companies"

I do find it upsetting that you and the other bashers would continue the one-sided enterage. There should always be two sides to an enterage, maybe even three or four.

And to enterage (can i use that as a verb?) against a family of companies. for shame. some of those companies are in grade school for God's sake! Have some humanity, you heartless, bashing ilk!

I'm still trying to figure out what word s/he meant to use there. The only word that resembles that is "entourage," and it certainly doesn't fit in this context. Any ideas?

Loren

[founder81]

"His view is that MacQuarrie and the other bashers continue their one-sided enterage against him and this family of companies"

I do find it upsetting that you and the other bashers would continue the one-sided enterage. There should always be two sides to an enterage, maybe even three or four.

And to enterage (can i use that as a verb?) against a family of companies. for shame. some of those companies are in grade school for God's sake! Have some humanity, you heartless, bashing ilk!

Your right. There is always 2 sides. And since "they" are well aware of this thread, then "they" can just come over here and give their side, who's stopping "them"?

[Gail Simone]

I had enterage once...I couldn't sit down for a WEEK!

I love the LBE family of companies. They make the best non-existant catsup in the world.

Gail

[OzBat!]

I have it on good authority that one of LBC's many subsidiaries were intimately involved with those superbly high-quality non-existant plastic toy doodads you don't get with your lightning-bolt branded non-cereal.

[Gail Simone]

Advance word from fans and critics spatulate that LBE Catsup will be the first Catsup to go to the Academy Awards!

Gail

[Justin D.]

All this verbage makes me think that J-Bolt hired George W. Bush as a new writer for LBC.

[OzBat!]

Don't tell anyone, but the fantastulosity that is J-Bolt has wrought wonders, uniting Dubya with Michael Moore for the screenplay treatment! What can he not do??

[Cam63]

Don't tell anyone, but the fantastulosity that is J-Bolt has wrought wonders, uniting Dubya with Michael Moore for the screenplay treatment! What can he not do??

I'm guessing the answer is, " Tie his shoelaces unless his carer unbuckles his comfy straitjacket first ", Oz'.

That, or credibility.

[founder81]

Advance word from fans and critics spatulate that LBE Catsup will be the first Catsup to go to the Academy Awards!

Gail

I got a whole truck load! Just send $20 of MacQ's money to:

founder81
c/o Howard the Duck
616 third avenue
Cleveland OH, 45789

[Cream Filled Taco]

It's J-Bolt time, and today "Heather" has provided lots of new material! For starters, did you know that Mark & Steph Heike were going to be working on the Bombshell comic, but later quit because J-Bolt proved that his Bolt character was published before their's was, so they got ticked off? Just search on Jul 7 for all the new make believe!

http://www.monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt

[Loren]

My favorite new line of the day from Heather:

About 90% of our staff are in the clerical, sales and web-design fields, as with many art-based businesses.

Uh-huh. For people with a such a substantial sales and web-design staff, they seem to be lacking somewhat in the areas of, well, sales and web-design.

And what's all this about y'all convincing Jaki Baskow to quit? I'd never even heard that name before.

Loren

[JeffreyWKramer]

I had enterage once...I couldn't sit down for a WEEK!


I dunno why, but that just cracks me up.

[Guapo Méndez]

It's J-Bolt time, and today "Heather" has provided lots of new material! For starters, did you know that Mark & Steph Heike were going to be working on the Bombshell comic, but later quit because J-Bolt proved that his Bolt character was published before their's was, so they got ticked off? Just search on Jul 7 for all the new make believe!

http://www.monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt


Geez. I feel like I want to hit someone. "your post is dangerously close to deletion and banning?" WTF.


I'd encourage those who post there to stop feeding the animal. I'm sure now that J-Bolt is one inmate in the Nevada Psychiatric Ward that has unlimited internet access.

He is no one. He will publish nothing, no matter that he thinks he's Mark Alessi and Ted Turner with Gene Simmons's hairstyle.

We will see the end of the world before we see anything by J-Crook. And even if we do, on principle I won't go see it/buy it. I'll download it, though. That's what this "ilk" does.

[kcarroll]

I think I will stop posting. I really didn't like the scolding tone I received from Mistress Heather:

It was fun for a bit playing around with the Bolt, but I'm losing interest. Every time we are able to ask a specific question about the content, Heather/J-Bolt deletes the string.

As there are only 3 of us posting, myself, Ed Weave, and Ariel, I imagine traffic will decrease significantly. Will Heather respond to herself, or create another persona?

[MacQuarrie]

And what's all this about y'all convincing Jaki Baskow to quit? I'd never even heard that name before.
Jaki Baskow is a public relations person from Las Vegas. In an earlier version of the LBC site, J-Bolt loudly trumpeted her name and agency as being the reps for the Bombshell project, so I looked her up and made a phone call. She flatly denied representing him or his project.

Her version was that she met him once when he came to her office with a script and some woman who was supposed to be his assistant but acted more like his girlfriend. She put him in touch with the alleged director of the film, who is a friend of hers. That was the end of her involvement with the project, until I called her.

J-Bolt accused me of making up the conversation I described, then posted his version of his own conversation with Jak, in which she calls me a weirdo and suggests that I badmouthed J-Bolt and made vaguely threatening remarks.

Shortly thereafter, her name vanished from the site. Since then, when she has been mentioned, the story has alternated between her quitting due to my menacing behavior or J-Bolt firing her for incompetence. Whichever better suits his needs at the moment.

I'm e-mailing the comment about her to Jaki now.

[MacQuarrie]

http://www.baskow.com is Jaki's website. It has contact information, so if anyone wants to verify my version of reality, there's the source.

[MacQuarrie]

Ms. Baskow,

I'm sorry to come back like a bad penny to bother you again with this nonsense; J-Bolt has resurfaced once again, and is now blaming all his troubles on my "interference" (that is, my attempts to verify his many extravagant claims). I believe he has crossed the line into libel at least a few times now, and I'm considering legal action. Could you be so kind as to answer one question for me?

I found this comment on J-Bolt's message board <http://pub36.bravenet.com/forum/3027534503/>:
"But, the bashers actually managed to succeed in getting Jaki Baskow to disassociate with the project because she had never encountered such nutjobs and was alarmed when she had dozens of e-mails and phone calls from them. She didn't want that harrassment, so she resigned from the project and J-Bolt, because of those jerks. She was just an agent so there was no great loss, but the fact remains that they intended to do damage."

On other occasions, he has claimed that he fired you as his agent for failing to properly represent him in the making of his movie.

The question: Is any of this accurate?

Thank you for your time.

Jim MacQuarrie

[founder81]

And no, J-Bolt doesn't have time to post under an assumed name

OK? Defending someone when no accusations were being made. (I haven't seen this accusation brought up on the LBC boards. Why be on the defensive?)

company businesses

So, they were "a family of companies", and now "company businesses"?? This doesn't even make sense to me, at all, in anyway, its not even funny. Well it is funny but only because a person said this in a serious manner. OK it is funny. Damn funny.

[Loren]

The Lightning Bolt Comics website (http://www.lightning-bolt-comics.com/home.html) is back up and running. And in the week that it was offline, J-Bolt's web design staff have really earned their keep. They eliminated the frames, and they changed the text on the home page. I don't know where they found the time to do all that.

Heather's promises that we'll know who Marinna is "by the day's end," so that would indicate that more changes will happen today. At the rate they work, I'll be surprised if J-Bolt's 'web designers' get anything done by Labor Day.

Of course, they have an excuse, and it's listed right on the front page: "We can't get a lot of work done on the site without J-Bolt's hands-on approach of running his companies." In other words, they're simply incompetent.

Loren

[Typo Lad]

His seat is on a 3-alarm fire about this

Poor J-Bolt. That sounds painful.

[Sheldon]

Whoohooo I ain't banned any more from the forums....

[Loren]

Y'know, while the site says they got rid of the frames, did it actually *have* frames before? I don't remember any, now that I think of it.

I put LBC into the Wayback Machine, and pulled up some fun old tidbits:

BOLTTM CELEBRATES 20 YEARS! That's right, LBC Fans! Comics' newest legend celebrates his 20th Birthday this year. How did this happen? Our legal department found that the copyright date had to be changed due to Bolt first being published in 1981 in a school newspaper, after his creation by J-Bolt. That means that the big guy has a whole new birthday. To celebrate, we'll be making alot of spectacular additions to the site this year...including LBC as an ISP. Bookmark us for all the updates. If we've slipped on changing a date in the copyright notices, we apologize...but now you know.

DOWNLOAD THE JASON PEARSON/CLASS ARTICLE For those who were curious about Jason Pearson being a student of J-Bolt's at the now-named Community College of Southern Nevada, you can now download the actual newspaper scan from the April, 1990 story. By the way...you'll note that J-Bolt's name looks a little awkward from the rest of the newspaper article. That's because we purposely edited the fact that the reporter used J-Bolt's real name. We didn't go into absolute detail in pain-stakingly making his name (and area surrounding it) look EXACTLY like the rest of the newspaper. We hope this clears things up for those who didn't...*ahem*...understand this.

Loren

[Typo Lad]

That's because we purposely edited the fact that the reporter used J-Bolt's real name.



But I thought J-Bolt WAS his real name.

Seriously though, one has to wonder why he's so hung up on the name thing. Outstanding warrants, maybe?

[jimmything2681]

holy fucking run-on sentence, batman.

His seat is on a 3 alarm fire about this because 2 major stars are negotiating their involvement in the project before signing the papers and accepting their roles in this long awaited film project and everyone is VERY anxious to see the outcome.

Also, gotta love the legal threat when you right click on his site.

[EdContradictory]

changed due to Bolt first being published in 1981 in a school newspaper

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

This guy is much more enjoyably deluded than Donovan.

[Roquefort Raider]

His seat is on a 3-alarm fire about this

Poor J-Bolt. That sounds painful.


Worse than an acute case of enterage!

[Gail Simone]

I had a three alarm seat fire once.

I couldn't sit down for a WEEK!

Gail

[Cam63]

A " 3 alarm seat fire " ? 'Sounds like you're lucky to be able to ever sit down again, Simm'. You must've just off it by the mearest nick of time...

Maybe you need professional advice on how to avoid it ever happening again....

[Cam63]

Ummm...

Why didn't the sprinkler system activate ?

[Loren]

Egad, the Wayback Machine (http://www.archive.org/) is a godsend for filling me in on all the J-Bolt I missed over the years. You can read more about LBC and J-Bolt on that site than you can on his current one.

I've been perusing the site as it appeared Feb 2001, and there's all manner of great stuff:

He wrote the stories for 10 more When Lightning Strikes titles and had three more drawn. He was often known for using water-color markers to do his color maps and comic stories.

If three issues were written AND drawn in 2001, then what's the delay now?

In 1999, Lightning Bolt Productions, Co. was formed, ahead of schedule, in request to produce the upcoming hit movie, "BombShell"! That's right, BombShell Fans! Everyone's favorite Gorgeous Psychotic is coming to life in Lightning Bolt Comics first live-action feature film!

I had no idea this farce had gone on that long. And Heather just said something about LBC having troubles because it's a 'new' company.

Fans all over the planet are excited about the Lightning Bolt frenzy. Just ask the Presidents of our fan clubs that stretch as far as Japan!

Of course, none of those Presidents are J-Bolt. Heather confirmed this.

And to answer my own subsidiaries question:

Creating subsidiaries such as Lightning Bolt Productions, Lightning Bolt International and Lightning Bolt Web, J-Bolt continues to make the Company into a large conglomerate, ready to take on all the competitions.

There's a page if you want to advertise in LBC comics (at prices up to $3300), one on jobs available at LBC, and one giving the whole detailed history of how J-Bolt created (and copyrighted!) the LBC characters. On the work page, for instance, there's this requirement for penciller applications:

Must be able to complete at least 5 pages per week to get first available positions.

5 pages per week x 52 weeks a year x 3 years = 800+ pages of desired output since 2001. I can see why J-Bolt's overworked, having to make up for this deficit.

Loren

[Loren]

More fun Wayback quotes from the LBC site of old:

Development has begun on the "When Lightning Strikes" movie scheduled for production after the release of "BombShell".
The project is a hush-hush production but what can be told is that it will be computer-animated with as good, if not better, effects than any computer-animated film ever released.
On top of this, the fans will be excited to find out that this film will feature virtually every LBC character in existance at the time of its release. Keep an eye out for more news on this item.

If you've wondered why we haven't seen a "Bombshell" comic:

On July 1, 2001, J-Bolt announced the change of release dates for the BombShell comic book.
To be aligned with the final production of the BombShell movie, the comic book will be released during final filming of the movie. The reasoning for this is so that fans stay familiar and excited with the character and her storyline. In affect, when the film comes out (tentative relase date being Valentines Day, 2004), the fans and followers will be fresh with comparing the storyline of the "Gorgeous Psychotic" to that of the comic itself.

And speaking of Valentine's Day 2004:

The release date of Valentine's Day, 2003, for Lightning Bolt Productions first live-action feature film, "BombShell," was changed to Valentine's Day, 2004.
...
J-Bolt's Valentine's Day release is in line with their planned publicity line for the film which is why that particular release date is important to the film. J-Bolt swore that no matter what, he will be relasing it on this newly planned date and nothing will stand in his way of doing so, short of the World coming to an end.

But then again, J-Bolt didn't count on the mighty power that is wielded by the denizens of the bash forums, a power that dwarfs even planetary annihilation (apparently).

Loren

[kingdom2000]

I just fell sorry for the guy :(

[Spike-X]

I just fell sorry for the guy :(
As has been brought up before, it'd be a lot easier to feel sorry for him if he wasn't taking money from people and giving nothing in return.

[kcarroll]

The member site is up. It apparently costs $5.95, so despite J-Bolt's claims of providing some kind of content for free, he has gone right back to charging for nothing.


and, Spike, Very cool having "lost in the flood" quoted in your signature. That's almost as cool as the guy with the Zevon quote.

[Typo Lad]

See, that torqes me off. I don't mean J-bolt, per se, but just about any "pay" comic book site.

I mean, I can get hundreds, if not thousands of free comics online. What is so special about YOUR comic that I would want to pay a re-occuring fee to read it?

It's like pay-porn sites. You can get the same content on Usenet.

Or um, so I hear.

[Sheldon]

Does anyone think that the bombshell pages will be the ones he posted on the old board?

[Loren]

Only a complete preview of BombShell #1 with a few of the inked pages (without dialog) and the thumbnail plot pages of the rest of the pages!

That doesn't sound even remotely "complete" to me.

Loren

[Typo Lad]

Pff. That's not worth my money.


Give me a full color comic, with dialogue, with a good interface. Supermegatopia.com does it...for free.

Greedy bastiches...

[Sheldon]

Its times like this I regret losing the stuff on the old boards.....he posted 3-4 pages of inked bombshell pages then, its probably that exact same stuff....

[Loren]

Out of morbid curiosity, I clicked on the "Buy Now" button for membership. I got the following message from Paypal.

Error Detected
There was a problem with the decryption of your secure order. Please contact your merchant.

So just in case you *want* to pay $6 to see some unlettered pages and thumbnail sketches, you can't.

Loren

[Loren]

Before anyone jumps to pay that $6, you may want to read the fine print:

*Prices subject to change at any time and it is the Members' responsibility to keep apprised of such changes. Introductory Price Member Subscription is only good until more titles and issues are added to the Members Section.

In other words, not only does your six bucks only get you some unfinished work, but if he ever puts *finished* work up, it's gonna cost you more.

In trying to copy that line of text, I took a look at his source code. I think somebody may have shared this on the old boards, but here are a sampling of the words in his META tag:

jon langley, shazam, captain, marvel, batman, DC, marvel, superman, spiderman, spider-man, hulk, x, x-men, daredevil, catwoman, ghost, rider, fantastic

Now I could be mistaken, but I'm pretty sure that using your competitors trademarks in your META tag is not a legal fair use. If he had some commentary on Superman or the others, maybe. But as it stands, I think that our copyright-obsessed creator is engaging in illegal appropriation.

And who is "Jon Langley"?

Loren

[founder81]

In trying to copy that line of text, I took a look at his source code. I think somebody may have shared this on the old boards, but here are a sampling of the words in his META tag:

jon langley, shazam, captain, marvel, batman, DC, marvel, superman, spiderman, spider-man, hulk, x, x-men, daredevil, catwoman, ghost, rider, fantastic

Loren

No, it was this thread. Actually I did, but this is what I got when i did the source thing:

<meta name="KEYWORDS"
content="comics, J-Bolt, bolt, bombshell, lightning, bat, super, spawn, movies, hollywood, films, producers, Rena Mero, Pat Morita, Adam West">

Its changed since then.

[Loren]

No, it was this thread. Actually I did, but this is what I got when i did the source thing:

<meta name="KEYWORDS"
content="comics, J-Bolt, bolt, bombshell, lightning, bat, super, spawn, movies, hollywood, films, producers, Rena Mero, Pat Morita, Adam West">

Its changed since then.

Yeah, most of those words are still there, but he's just added to it. Here's the whole list:

<meta name="Keywords"
content="bolt, bombshell, blond, eliminator, electro, jon langley, movies, comic, comics, comix, book, books, magazines, periodicals, teen, adult, kids, children, child, rena. mero, sable, pat, morita, adam, west, jackson, bostwick, shazam, captain, marvel, batman, marinna, art, artwork, lightning, artist, artists, pen, ink, paint, computer, graphics, color, colors, coloring, DC, marvel, superman, spiderman, spider-man, hulk, x, x-men, daredevil, catwoman, ghost, rider, fantastic">

I'm also curious why "Electro" is listed. Does J-Bolt have a character by that name he hasn't told us about? And if so, did he create this 'Electro' prior to 1964, when Marvel's premiered? Maybe it was a sketch he did in pre-school, which his parents promptly copyrighted.

Loren

[founder81]

I'm also curious why "Electro" is listed. Does J-Bolt have a character by that name he hasn't told us about? And if so, did he create this 'Electro' prior to 1964, when Marvel's premiered? Maybe it was a sketch he did in pre-school, which his parents promptly copyrighted.

Loren
That crazy J-Bolt. What companies in his family of company businesses owns electro?

[Gail Simone]

I can't believe he'd ask for six bucks for that crappy comic and a few pages, undialogued, of Bombshell.

What a strange, strange mystery that guy is.

Gail

[Guapo Méndez]

That crazy J-Bolt. What companies in his family of company businesses owns electro?


J-Bolt's Power and Industry division.

[founder81]

It is our fault that no comics or movies are made. No one has paid the member's fee. How can you make a movie without money. Please, it's simple logic. Its our fault. We need to pay him. And Gail, stop putting out books every month, don't you know if there are books on the shelf J-Bolt can't get any money for his coming soon book. How can you get people to pay to see a coming soon book if there are books on the shelf to spend money on. Stop it. Just stop it. Everyone stop it. Stop it.

[Cream Filled Taco]

It's J-Bolt update time again! Today's choice quotes:

Description of Marinna:
"As a 21 year old anti-nuclear protestor, she was caught in an accident that merge her with the water she was in at the beach that she and other protestors were demonstrating at. She was given the ability to control any surrounding water and to become water, herself.

Her identity isn't a secret as her name is Marinna Stillwell and the wetsuit she was wearing at the time of the incident also gained the same properties as she did, thus she made it her costume.

Given the idea from her friends, she decided to use these abilities to help stop the rampage of this woman they had heard about on the news, BombShell, and she loved the feeling of being a hero so much that she wanted to continue doing so, in order for what happened to her doesn't go as being in vain."

I'd have to agree here:
"So far, the BombShell comic book is still conforming to the production of the film..."

Wow, Mr. Fisher must've slipped in before the harsh LBC hiring standards kicked in:
"It's really quite possible that you've seen Jim Fisher's work from the time before he was involved with LBC. I'm not really sure what other comics he worked on since he did a lot of piece work. He works from home so I don't see him in the offices in order to ask him, either."

All this and more can be found in the archive: http://monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt

[Typo Lad]

It's J-Bolt update time again! Today's choice quotes:

Description of Marinna:... http://monkeyspit.com/jbolt.txt

Wow.

Just, wow.

Trying to read that hurt my brain. A LOT.

[OzBat!]

"It's really quite possible that you've seen Jim Fisher's work from the time before he was involved with LBC. I'm not really sure what other comics he worked on since he did a lot of piece work. He works from home so I don't see him in the offices in order to ask him, either."That bit right there explains why J-Bolt's "hands-on" managerial approach works ohhhh-so-well with his dozens of staffers! If neither he nor his multiple personalities ever talk to each other, no instructions can be passed on!

Maybe he should install a few mirrors around the house?

[Loren]

It is our fault that no comics or movies are made. No one has paid the member's fee. How can you make a movie without money. Please, it's simple logic. Its our fault. We need to pay him.

Can't. His Paypal link is still broken.

In flipping through the Ashcan, I noticed something odd on page 9. A couple of weeks back, I poked fun at the supposed winners (http://forums.comicbookresources.com/showthread.php?p=154107&highlight=Buchanan#post154107) of J-Bolt's "Win a Lifetime Income Contest."

Well, all of those runners-up names, info, and prizes are gone from that page now. Only the lead-in sentence remains. The bottom of the page is blanked out, even cutting away at the bottom of the Sinergy picture.

Loren

[Cam63]

I can't believe he'd ask for six bucks for that crappy comic and a few pages, undialogued, of Bombshell.

What a strange, strange mystery that guy is.

Gail

How does that line go ?

" He's an onion, wrapped around an enigma, cloaked in a mystery, then dumped into a sackashit..." ?

Somethin' like that... :D

[kingdom2000]

Bah while this thread is interesting to read i can't help but think you keep picking on the retarded (or insane, open to debate on that).

Leave the poor loony alone....seriously your increasing the hits to his page giving him a false allusion of interest, therefore only encouraging his behavior.

For you know he may have some formula...a new personality for every hundred hits. All those hits, more people in his head. One day violence cause what if he has an office party. Or what if that ahole in accounting dukes it out with that butt in marketing? Then he would have to like someone juggle 2 personalities fighting and a few others trying to break it up all at the same time! The sheer stress could cause a final snappage into evil J-Bolt! Then we would all be doomed!!!

...i forgot my point, oh well.

[Slayven]

can some one give me a summary of the ballard of j-bolt?

[Typo Lad]

Hmm...wasn't "Marina" a member of Alpha Flight?

[Sheldon]

can some one give me a summary of the ballard of j-bolt?
MacQ has a great article about J-Bolt

Go here:
http://www.monkeyspit.net/rantman/

[Patrick Ferguson]

Wow. I am so getting a Bolt T-shirt.

[Slayven]

MacQ has a great article about J-Bolt

Go here:
http://www.monkeyspit.net/rantman/
good stuff. almsot as funny as the guy who scammed the ebay scammers

[the4thpip]

good stuff. almsot as funny as the guy who scammed the ebay scammers
You mean that thing with the laptop? That was great! Was there ever a sequel?

Sexy!
http://prodtn.cafepress.com/4/2965514_F_tn.jpg

[Loren]

The LBC Membership Tour (http://www.lightning-bolt-comics.com/Tour/tour1.html) is now up and running. It's almost entirely the same text as appeared on the Tour back in 2001, though. Here's a sampling:

Members also get sneak previews into future Lightning Bolt Entertainment media previews such as we're hiring the top game creators to make the Beta Games that will be here, in the Subscribers' section BEFORE they're released in the stores.

Loren

[Michael P]

Hmm...wasn't "Marina" a member of Alpha Flight?Yep. And the origin sounds fishily (nyuk nyuk) like Stan Lee's Just Imagine: Aquaman.

Oh, fun project: At some con or other, there should be a YABS Scavenger Hunt, and "any product from J-Bolt Productions" should be on the list.

[Slayven]

You mean that thing with the laptop? That was great! Was there ever a sequel?

Sexy!
http://prodtn.cafepress.com/4/2965514_F_tn.jpg
Yeah that was funny as heck. Nah, no one has topped that yet

[Locke]

Can I get a link to the laptop story. I have no idea what your talking about.

I want in on the fun to. :rolleyes:

[the4thpip]

Yeah that was funny as heck. Nah, no one has topped that yet
When I read it, it wasn't really clear if the guy picked it up or not, I think... I was wondering if it had ever been resolved.

For those of you who are members on the Joe Q boards, here (http://www.joequesada.com/cgi-bin/ikonboard/ikonboard.cgi?s=40f1888c3f46ffff;act=ST;f=1;t=1803 6;hl=mary) is a little fun I had with a "Nigerian scammer". Whoever he was, he did not know David Hasselhoff's face. :eek:

[the4thpip]

Can I get a link to the laptop story. I have no idea what your talking about.

I want in on the fun to. :rolleyes:
Here you go, it's a pdf file: http://students.uwf.edu/cjg5/sa/thepowerbook.pdf

[Slayven]

When I read it, it wasn't really clear if the guy picked it up or not, I think... I was wondering if it had ever been resolved.

For those of you who are members on the Joe Q boards, here (http://www.joequesada.com/cgi-bin/ikonboard/ikonboard.cgi?s=40f1888c3f46ffff;act=ST;f=1;t=1803 6;hl=mary) is a little fun I had with a "Nigerian scammer". Whoever he was, he did not know David Hasselhoff's face. :eek:
last i read of it they had peopel staking out teh address that the laptop was suppose to be sent to

[Locke]

That is the funniest thing I have ever read. Thanx for the link.

[Michael P]

Description:
A lot of bear kidneys from various bears, including (but not limited to) polar, grizzly,
brown, Yogi, black, panda, and Care.

That, my friends, is pure genius.

[Loren]

Now back up: LBC's "About Us" Page (http://www.lightning-bolt-comics.com/Company/aboutus.html).

The text is mostly the same as appeared on this page back in 2001, but with one notable addition. In the paragraph after the one singing the praises of Rena Mero, there's a new paragraph explaining how/why Mero pulled out of the movie.

More importantly, there are 3 pictures of J-Bolt himself, 2 posing with Steve Carr, and some samples of J-Bolt's original cover designs.

The timeline also implicitly tells us that J-Bolt created Bolt at age 12.

And in case you haven't paid attention to the Current Online Comics (http://www.lightning-bolt-comics.com/comicsonline.html) page, in addition to WLS0 and the Bombshell preview, your $6 will also get you discounts at the LBC store, and a free downloadable LBC desktop background (for screens 784 x 576 pixels).

Loren

[Sheldon]

Carr looks so thrilled to be in those photos...

[Loren]

In other (i.e. non-website) J