Why HETEROSEXUAL CREATORS need to love the Dazzler.

[Novaya Havoc]

1. She is a GOLDMINE of story and financial pontential.
2. Gay men love her.
3. Currying the favor of gays ensures you more female attention.
4. Dazzler has a gnarly sister -- Lois London -- who will CRAVE your attention (don't all hot chicks have a gnarly sister?!).
5. Dazzler is not afraid to show cleavage when she performs.
6. She's way cooler than roided up bitches like Cable, Bishop, or X-23.
7. Chris Yost adores Lois London (ensuring his desire to become a faghag-hag of Dazz).
8. BECAUSE I SAID SO STOP MAKING CRAPPY MINISERIES FOR MEDIOCRE MALE CHARACTERS AND GIVE DAZZLER SOME DAMN DIVASPARKLE!!!!

There is a poll for this thread. I recommend you vote. Your vote is public.

[Greg Anderson]

Nah, that's ok. :tongue:

[Leirus]

Lol Novaya, women may be actually also heterosexuals...

And last time a woman write her, was the best one in looooooooooooooong years. So, why not a woman writing? and not a heterosexual male?

:wink:

[Twisted Bliss]

Bless you.

You're like a bundle of hope and optimism. Good for you Novaya ya little minx.

[Novaya Havoc]

Lol Novaya, women may be actually also heterosexuals...

And last time a woman write her, was the best one in looooooooooooooong years. So, why not a woman writing? and not a heterosexual male?

:wink:

Oh, I prefer that. Gail Simone did Dazzler right. But name me any female Marvel writers that would be all on this shiz.

[Leirus]

Oh, I prefer that. Gail Simone did Dazzler right. But name me any female Marvel writers that would be all on this shiz.

Ups. This is embarrasing. Up until now I thought Kieron Giffsomething was a woman :redface:

Anyway, I only know two women at Marvel, Louise Simonson, and the one from NYX... oh, and the Occassional Superheroine, now... (Crap, I am bad for foreign names)

[The Black Guardian]

Someone needs to spike Alison's crystal meth with alum.

[Novaya Havoc]

Someone needs to spike Alison's crystal meth with alum.

Someone needs to throw you into the fires of Hell.

[Raptor]

1. She is a GOLDMINE of story and financial pontential.
2. Gay men love her.
3. Currying the favor of gays ensures you more female attention.
4. Dazzler has a gnarly sister -- Lois London -- who will CRAVE your attention (don't all hot chicks have a gnarly sister?!).
5. Dazzler is not afraid to show cleavage when she performs.
6. She's way cooler than roided up bitches like Cable, Bishop, or X-23.
7. Chris Yost adores Lois London (ensuring his desire to become a faghag-hag of Dazz).
8. BECAUSE I SAID SO STOP MAKING CRAPPY MINISERIES FOR MEDIOCRE MALE CHARACTERS AND GIVE DAZZLER SOME DAMN DIVASPARKLE!!!!

There is a poll for this thread. I recommend you vote. Your vote is public.


All good reasons. I'm a dazzler fan too. Not as big a fan as some, but I am.

I vote more Dazzler. If not in more books, at least more on panel time.

[Leirus]

Someone needs to spike Alison's crystal meth with alum.


I... I have not understand that sentence at all...

*goes to wordreference*

Um, ok, so crystal meth is M... but Alum?

[GalactaSurfer]

Dazzler has fan? :confused: :eek:

[rajincajun689]

Dazzler has fan? :confused: :eek:

I wouldn't say something like that. Dazzler fans are crazy.

[GalactaSurfer]

I wouldn't say something like that. Dazzler fans are crazy.

Like Natives chasing Indiana Jones crazy?

[Josef F.]

Mariah Carey/Celine Dion levels of Crazy.

[GalactaSurfer]

Mariah Carey/Celine Dion levels of Crazy.

YIKES!

In that case....

I love Dazzler! If she was a real girl i'd bang her. She seems like the freaky type im into :wink: :biggrin:

[Shyft]

i actually like Dazzler less because of the ridiculous amount of attention she recieves on this forum. I would be open to her changing my mind by being on one of the core X-books though.

[Kid Seven]

This poll is insane.

Thanks. :biggrin:

[jarrod]

Dare I say, Dazzler's glitterati has done her a far greater disservice than even one Mister Christopher Claremont?! [/troll]

But hey, look on the bright side. At least she was never a dinosaur. :frown:

[Prodigy55]

Dazzler is divine goddess.

[justinkos91]

Dazzler is fine if she isn't Wolverine'd (appear in a crap-load of books)
I don't mind her, and as long as she has the spotlight in at least 1 book
Don't want too much of a good thing now :tongue:
I support this. She needs a team that's suitable for her though...

[Psy J]

6. She's way cooler than roided up bitches like Cable, Bishop, or X-23.
Now that is a terrible thing to say. X-23 is a loyal Dazz fan. She even crowd-surfed at one of her concerts! For serious!

[MartinRedmond]

Ups. This is embarrasing. Up until now I thought Kieron Giffsomething was a woman :redface:

You mean Keith Giffen?

[gorthon616]

I would have a morbid curiosity in a Bendis written Dazzler story.

[Agent_Torpor]

YIKES!

In that case....

I love Dazzler! If she was a real girl i'd bang her. She seems like the freaky type im into :wink: :biggrin:

That was the most bloated testesterone-laden post i've ever seen in a Dazzler thread! :eek: :biggrin:

I can smell the scent of Axe Bodyspray a mile away from this post! Drakkar Noir-drenched!

[rage6839]

Dazzler? Why would people write about a device used to put sparkles on jeans. Very confusing




6. She's way cooler than roided up bitches like Cable, Bishop, or X-23.
There is a poll for this thread. I recommend you vote. Your vote is public.

[MartinRedmond]

http://www.seenontv.com/prod-pages/images1/BeDazzler_Thumb.jpg
Diva sparkles, activate!

[Til]

At this point, I'm hoping for Dazzler's resurgence to start with increased appearances in Uncanny and maybe a mini of her own (the mini, of course, would also include the return of Lois London). That way we can better introduce the REAL Dazzler to those who might've been confused by the one in New Excalibur.

[GalactaSurfer]

That was the most bloated testesterone-laden post i've ever seen in a Dazzler thread! :eek: :biggrin:

I can smell the scent of Axe Bodyspray a mile away from this post! Drakkar Noir-drenched!

In that case i will highjack the top position of Dazzler fandom. She is now my favorite girl right under Jessica Alba....... MMM under Jessica Alba :smile:

[Prodigy55]

OH NOES!
I voted for "WHY DO YOU HAVE THIS HETERO H8?! I LOVE ROIDED UP CABLE!!!!!1" by accident.

[GalactaSurfer]

Now that I’m the epitome of Dazzler Fandom I decree that she have an ongoing title with the creative awesomeness of Frank Cho (who will be chained to a desk and required to illustrate all 300 issues of the title) and written by homegirl that’s writing NYX right now (forget her name.:redface: )

[prince_nightcrawler]

You forgot to include in your poll "Dazzler sucks and Jubilee should kill her."

[eurazn]

Dare I say, Dazzler's glitterati has done her a far greater disservice than even one Mister Christopher Claremont?! [/troll]

But hey, look on the bright side. At least she was never a dinosaur. :frown:

You and your trollish ways, Jarrod! Grrr, don't you have a shrine to erect in a dinosaur's honor?

[Agent_Torpor]

OH NOES!
I voted for "WHY DO YOU HAVE THIS HETERO H8?! I LOVE ROIDED UP CABLE!!!!!1" by accident.

You actually have to have a tribal shoulder tat, a pickup truck in the driveway, and a t-shirt from Big Dog in order to vote for that option.

[tetragene]

Now that I’m the epitome of Dazzler Fandom I decree that she have an ongoing title with the creative awesomeness of Frank Cho (who will be chained to a desk and required to illustrate all 300 issues of the title) and written by homegirl that’s writing NYX right now (forget her name.:redface: )

I think that is my ultimate wish now--to see Dazzler as drawn by Frank Cho <3 It's a cryin shame he was taken of UXM as soon as the "new status quo" started--we could have at least got a few panels of Dazzler by Cho :-(

[eurazn]

You actually have to have a tribal shoulder tat, a pickup truck in the driveway, and a t-shirt from Big Dog in order to vote for that option.

Swap out Big Dog for Ed Hardy, Affliction or Monarchy and you've just escalated the 'roidism to d-bag-ism.

I think that is my ultimate wish now--to see Dazzler as drawn by Frank Cho <3 It's a cryin shame he was taken of UXM as soon as the "new status quo" started--we could have at least got a few panels of Dazzler by Cho :-(

I know! That would have been HOT ... just look at the treatment Martinique got!

[GalactaSurfer]

I think that is my ultimate wish now--to see Dazzler as drawn by Frank Cho <3 It's a cryin shame he was taken of UXM as soon as the "new status quo" started--we could have at least got a few panels of Dazzler by Cho :-(

MMMMM Dazzler Cho :tongue:

[Agent_Torpor]

Swap out Big Dog for Ed Hardy, Affliction or Monarchy and you've just escalated the 'roidism to d-bag-ism.




You're absolutely right. The hetero-roid crowd have "upgraded" their couture accordingly.

Ed Hardy. Hurts me. Badly.

[Bingo!]

This thread is the opening thread in next year's San Francisco Gay Parade. It'll be feraliciously fierce.

[GalactaSurfer]

You're absolutely right. The hetero-roid crowd have "upgraded" their couture accordingly.

Ed Hardy. Hurts me. Badly.

Is hetero-roid like a slur directed at straight men? Dazzler will take offence to this in defence of her man-harem

[Agent_Torpor]

This thread is the opening thread in next year's San Francisco Gay Parade. It'll be feraliciously fierce.

I'm lubing up my chaps in anticipation!

[Stephen Moreno]

Maybe if you gays would just think like the rest of hetero's we wouldn't have any of these problems.

[eurazn]

Is hetero-roid like a slur directed at straight men? Dazzler will take offence to this in defence of her man-harem

It's directed at d-bags who happen to be straight. :tongue:

Maybe if you gays would just think like the rest of hetero's we wouldn't have any of these problems.

I think the current state of the world proves there would be a host of OTHER more severe problems instead, heh.

[Excelsior]

.
7. Chris Yost adores Lois London.

Thats all you had to say :tongue:

[GalactaSurfer]

This thread is the opening thread in next year's San Francisco Gay Parade. It'll be feraliciously fierce.

Dazzler isn't only for gay men now!! :mad:

[eurazn]

Dazzler isn't only for gay men now!! :mad:

PFLAG marches in the parades, also, and they're not gay. You are a friend of the gays at least, right? Dazzler sure is! :smile:

[Bingo!]

Dazzler isn't only for gay men now!! :mad:

Gay men don't bother with the Gay Parades anymore. We hire straights to march, make out, and get merry with their straight friends. It's basically a homo mardi gras for the heteros.

So yes, Dazzles is for everyone.

[Agent_Torpor]

Gay men don't bother with the Gay Parades anymore. We hire straights to march, make out, and get merry with their straight friends. It's basically a homo mardi gras for the heteros.

So yes, Dazzles is for everyone.

I'm too busy waiting for a table at Tartine to worry about marches or parades.

[GalactaSurfer]

PFLAG marches in the parades, also, and they're not gay. You are a friend of the gays at least, right? Dazzler sure is! :smile:

Ya help me get womenand i have many lesi friends so yes I am a friend of the gays.

[mikekerr3]

I wouldn't say something like that. Dazzler fans are crazy.

Isn't that kind of self evident:tongue:

[Waterlily]

OH NOES!
I voted for "WHY DO YOU HAVE THIS HETERO H8?! I LOVE ROIDED UP CABLE!!!!!1" by accident.

You actually have to have a tribal shoulder tat, a pickup truck in the driveway, and a t-shirt from Big Dog in order to vote for that option.

My tribal tatted, pick-up driving, Big Dog t-shirt wearing roided out inner self wants to vote. So should I vote for ^that^ or Lois London?

MMMMM Dazzler Cho :tongue:

Or maybe I'll vote for that instead.

[Bingo!]

Agent_Torpor,Tartine is delicious, I prefer crawfish beignets from Brenda's.

Waterlily, You in a pick up is magic.

[Agent_Torpor]

We should have an X-BRUNCH at Tartine's one glorious Saturday.

That is, if I can crawl my wizened carcass all the way from the Western Addition.

[Agent_Torpor]

Judge Ginsberg's lace doily ascot = matronly chic or slobber wiper?

[Bic]

I confess that thanks to the sad, plain, little hetero life I have I used to not "get" Dazzler. But thanks to this board I now understand that the X-books are a far more interesting and divalicious place with her around. So thank you CBR X-Boards for your continuing efforts to makes comics as fabulous as possible.

[GalactaSurfer]

I confess that thanks to the sad, plain, little hetero life I have I used to not "get" Dazzler. But thanks to this board I now understand that the X-books are a far more interesting and divalicious place with her around. So thank you CBR X-Boards for your continuing efforts to makes comics as fabulous as possible.

Your sig is perfection.

[Agent_Torpor]

Your sig is perfection.

Seriously. I love ball point pens.

[Excelsior]

Your sig is perfection.

Seconded. <BIC> Im voting for you for X-poster of the month during the next voting period.

[The Blinkmeister]

Dazzler should star in a soap opera (she is an actresss after all :wink: ), just like her real-life counterpart.

Oh, and get breast cancer too :cool: :biggrin:

[Novaya Havoc]

Oh, and get breast cancer too :cool: :biggrin:

Chew glass while poking yourself with dirty needles :cool: :biggrin:

[eurazn]

I'm too busy waiting for a table at Tartine to worry about marches or parades.

We should have an X-BRUNCH at Tartine's one glorious Saturday.

That is, if I can crawl my wizened carcass all the way from the Western Addition.

Tartine has about 3 tables, most of which are being used by the same individuals who were there 4 hours prior. Also, that place is in desperate need of air conditioning during the summer. However, I am a sucker for their Mexican wedding cookies! <3

I confess that thanks to the sad, plain, little hetero life I have I used to not "get" Dazzler. But thanks to this board I now understand that the X-books are a far more interesting and divalicious place with her around. So thank you CBR X-Boards for your continuing efforts to makes comics as fabulous as possible.

Our pleasure, Bic! :biggrin:

Your sig is perfection.

Indeed it is!

[Waterlily]

Agent_Torpor,Tartine is delicious, I prefer crawfish beignets from Brenda's.

Waterlily, You in a pick up is magic.

It was a magical moment (http://www.newbedfordfirefighters.com/Recent%20Incidents%20Files/4-30-07%20MVA/043007.jpg). Luckily, I escaped before the authorities arrived.

[The Black Guardian]

Someone needs to throw you into the fires of Hell.
You'll have to do much better than that. A world with Dazzler is already Hell.
I... I have not understand that sentence at all...

*goes to wordreference*

Um, ok, so crystal meth is M... but Alum?
Alum is a pickling spice. It's what causes a cucumber to shrivel, and I would very much like it if Dazzler's vocal cords would shrivel. It's also toxic in large amounts, but that's a risk I'm more than willing to take.
But hey, look on the bright side. At least she was never a dinosaur. :frown:
Dinosaurs > Popstars

[Prodigy55]

Chew glass while poking yourself with dirty needles :cool: :biggrin:

LOLOLOL!
I'm going to say this to people.

[alf_to_the_rescue]

Im not a big fan of her, but the AOA version was cool. She should be more like that. :smile:

[Anna]

Because if she'd do Beast, she'd do anyone.

[.LuckyStar.]

Lois London alone should be enough to have people love Dazzler!

[eurazn]

Because if she'd do Beast, she'd do anyone.

Yes, because Psylocke certainly never flirted with Beast or had her face licked by him.

[Anna]

Yes, because Psylocke certainly never flirted with Beast or had her face licked by him.

He made the move on Betsy.

[worstblogever]

You'll have to do much better than that. A world with Dazzler is already Hell.

Alum is a pickling spice. It's what causes a cucumber to shrivel, and I would very much like it if Dazzler's vocal cords would shrivel. It's also toxic in large amounts, but that's a risk I'm more than willing to take.

Dinosaurs > Popstars

Man, this opens a door to jokes about your shriveled cucumber. Don't give the Dazzler Army that kind of ammunition, if you want to survive their wrath.


And, as far as I'm concerned... LOIS LONDON! Come on! She kills cats and hobos. How has she not turned up in an X-book? Any X-book? She can fight with Hippie Hepzibah in Uncanny. She can take out transients around Detroit tire fires in X-Factor. Bodies of cats and hobos she's killed can be discovered by Kiden Nixon in NYX while she rifles through dumpsters looking for a meal. There's so many ways to bring her into a story... and yet, she's languished in obscurity for over two decades.

LOIS! Gimme LOIS!

[The Blinkmeister]

Im not a big fan of her, but the AOA version was cool. She should be more like that. :smile:

Yeah, probably my favourite AoA character after Blink and Morph.

[KieronGillen]

Ups. This is embarrasing. Up until now I thought Kieron Giffsomething was a woman :redface:

I tried to talk a female friend of mine to go to NYCC today posing as me for signings, just to ferment the "Kieron is a girl" meme. People should be confused about what sex I am, sez I.

Admitedly, when I grew a beard that made it trickier. But it's totally gone now.

KG

[darknessatnoon]

I tried to talk a female friend of mine to go to NYCC today posing as me for signings, just to ferment the "Kieron is a girl" meme. People should be confused about what sex I am, sez I.

Admitedly, when I grew a beard that made it trickier. But it's totally gone now.

KG

A real Dazzler fan would get a sex change. You are a dabbler, sir.

[prince_nightcrawler]

Man, this opens a door to jokes about your shriveled cucumber. Don't give the Dazzler Army that kind of ammunition, if you want to survive their wrath.


And, as far as I'm concerned... LOIS LONDON! Come on! She kills cats and hobos. How has she not turned up in an X-book? Any X-book? She can fight with Hippie Hepzibah in Uncanny. She can take out transients around Detroit tire fires in X-Factor. Bodies of cats and hobos she's killed can be discovered by Kiden Nixon in NYX while she rifles through dumpsters looking for a meal. There's so many ways to bring her into a story... and yet, she's languished in obscurity for over two decades.

LOIS! Gimme LOIS!

Hepzibah is a cat and a hobo. She can avenge her parents who were killed by Lois London.

[Psy J]

You'll have to do much better than that. A world with Dazzler is already Hell.
But Dazzler is a sista (http://goodcomics.comicbookresources.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/Wiki_dazzler_aa.jpg)! You should <3 her! :biggrin:

[Seres]

Hepzibah is a cat and a hobo. She can avenge her parents who were killed by Lois London.

Hepzibah is neither! Hepzibah is hippie chic!

http://media.comicvine.com/uploads/0/5648/321219-19009-hepzibah_super.gif

[prince_nightcrawler]

I wasn't meaning it to be a bad thing. I am not Lois! I do not h8.

And yet, it doesn't really matter because if she's a real hippie I could malign her all I want and all she'll do in response is get high and not have a job lol. I am not scared.

[Agent_Torpor]

Hepzibah is neither! Hepzibah is hippie chic!

http://media.comicvine.com/uploads/0/5648/321219-19009-hepzibah_super.gif

I don't remember the Iron Butterfly lyrics there in that scene!

LOL!

[eurazn]

He made the move on Betsy.

Yes, and her smiles and flirty banter clearly meant she was not interested.

Hepzibah is neither! Hepzibah is hippie chic!

http://media.comicvine.com/uploads/0/5648/321219-19009-hepzibah_super.gif

She just left the homeless shelter after being groomed and dressed in the best clothing the Pet Boutique had to offer. At her heart, though, she'll also be a cat hobo.

[Novaya Havoc]

I love how Lois London is polling the best here. Her time is nigh! <3 <3 <3

The point of this immaculately constructed treatise in forum-thread form is that straight male writers have an anti-Dazzler bias!!!!

[prince_nightcrawler]

I love how Lois London is polling the best here. Her time is nigh! <3 <3 <3

The point of this immaculately constructed treatise in forum-thread form is that straight male writers have an anti-Dazzler bias!!!!

She should be replaced by Lois London apparently.

[Novaya Havoc]

She should be replaced by Lois London apparently.

No. She'll be replaced by a second Ghost Rider ongoing.