Round 1: Andrew Huerta

[AzIz]

pg.1
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v435/druuw/th_Aspen1.jpg (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v435/druuw/Aspen1.jpg)
pg.2
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v435/druuw/th_Aspen2.jpg (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v435/druuw/Aspen2.jpg)
pg.3
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v435/druuw/th_Aspen3.jpg (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v435/druuw/Aspen3.jpg)

AH

[Ryall_IDW]

Page One
As an establishing shot, this panel doesn’t really get me excited, but it does set the scene well enough, anyway. The high ceilings inside the house in panel two don’t really seem like he’s in the same place (unless that place is the TARDIS), since it looks much bigger inside. But I do like his body language in panel two even if his anatomy doesn’t seem perfectly proportional, and I also like the unique perspective of moving the camera above the helicopter’s blades. We’re given what we need to know without having it thrown in our face. Panels three and four work fine for me.

Page Two
The abrupt use of excess blacks on panel one jarred me a bit—I thought “is this the same artist?” I also thought “damn, those Dos Esquis bottles are durable!” The second and third panels lack a bit of detail and depth.

Page Three
I’ll admit I’m not overly familiar with Aspen, but the face didn’t seem to look all that much like her (or maybe I’ve jus never looked her in the face before). I do always like a “powering-up” panel like in panel three, and panel four is your textbook double-handed power blast, which I also like quite a bit here.

[Vince Hernandez]

PAGE ONE:
Panel 1: While the beach house appears slightly too small for my tastes, it does fit what the script called for: "inconspicuous." The T-Bird appears to be almost as big as the house. The linework here is solid and the vista and peninsula look good.

Panel 2: Again, you followed the script well and put the towel in the foreground. I like the rendering on the towel as well as Chance's clothes. Even the socks.Nice attitude on Chance. His left forearm and hand are too big though. I don't like the bottom portion of the panel and all the negative space it takes up.

Panel 3: Nice blade effect, it really sells the motion well.This panel is well done.

Panel 4: Aspen doesn't quite match the reference. Your version has a harder face than it should. I like the direction and layout of this panel but I think it would've worked better with a standard panel design.

Panel 5: This panel is okay but a little confusing. Your trajectory seems off from where I think the missiles are firing. Hmm.

PAGE TWO:
Panel 1:This panel has both positives and negatives. Chance's proportions are off around his shoulders. Overall I dig the rendering on him. Your use of blacks looks good in some parts but not in others. I'm not big on the big patches of black you've placed in areas towards the bottoms of your panels. This is a good panel though overall.

Panel 2: I don't mind the shot of Chance's head but I don't think the position works for what you're trying to achieve. It appears as if his head was placed upside down in the foreground. I also don't get a sense of Aspen being pinned down under the wreckage, it looks as if she's popping her head out over a ledge. Maybe more of a defensive motion would work better.

Panel 3: She doesn't look like Aspen in this panel. The linework is confusing but I think it colors it would ultimately work. Your bubbles are far too uniform and don't capture the natural flow of water--try varying your bubble size more.

PAGE THREE:
Panel 1: While your version of Aspen is still off, I really like the emotion in this panel. Your lines seem confident and steady. Good work.Watch out for the slight tangent in the upper right leading into the smoke lines in the next panel.

Panel 2: This panel is confusing. While I like the challenging camera position, your foreground helicopter elements just don't sell themselves enough. You could also add more prominence to Aspen in this panel also.

Panel 3: For this panel I asked for a small inset panel and you made it one of the largest on the page. Reason why I wanted it small was because the action in this panel isn't the central focus of the page but rather a precurser set-up to the next panel. However, this panel does look great--just too big.

Panel 4: I won't beat a dead horse on Aspen's looks because you already are aware of the problem. Your Aspen in this panel is the furthest deviation from her look. Her face is far too masculine. Her water powers have a nice intensity to them. Again, be careful not to make her power look too uniform.

[jameslucasoni]

While stylistically confident, I’m having quite a few issues with these pages. From anatomy to shot selection to layout, in my mind these pages fall a little short of the samples I’ve already commented on…

Page 1 – The ridiculous amount of fullbleed panels give emphasis to everything and thus nothing. While panel 1 is mostly fine, and probably the strongest panel of the page, panel 2 (and the entrance of humans into our story) feels very stiff and cold. The body language seems more angry than relaxed and it looks like he’s leering at the girl rather than the TV. Panel 3 tells me nothing and the weird positioning on Aspen in panel 4 feels really awkward. Panel 5 is kind of interesting but the angle and framing of it makes it confusing and hard to decipher.

Page 2 – This is better than the first but I still am not getting the sense of action I want from the lead panel. The figure in the panel seems really awkward and there’s not a real sense of the explosion. Panels 2 and 3 work for the most part but are almost too small.

Page 3 – Panel 1 is more gratuitous than it needs to be, though her expression is one of the best character moments you deliver in this story. Panel 2 is a nice choice, but panel three is way too emphasized and, in this short story, it robs us of a bigger finish in page 4.

Obviously you’re a talented guy, or you wouldn’t have gotten this far in the competition, I just feel that these pages aren’t really A-game material.