RITA's XLII: For the Turnstiles

[Matt Algren]

Wait, Matt's gay now?

I miss everything.There's a whole frakkin thread about it.

Oh. Ok.


I say how-do a fair amount too. As I'm tipping my cowboy hat.
That's hot.

[Slam_Bradley]

Would a Cowboy's jersey do?

Only if you're from Tejas. Or your family passed through on the way to work in my fields.

[Jeff Brady]

Save you some if I can, kay?

Thank you, that's very sweet, but you don't have to.

[Michael P]

I wanna be off work.

Heh. I imagine you sitting in your office, bored and desperate for human companionship, acting out your own little CBR threads with your JLU action figures.

I suspect I'm Booster Gold.

[Guapo Méndez]

Heh. I imagine you sitting in your office, bored and desperate for human companionship, acting out your own little CBR threads with your JLU action figures.

I suspect I'm Booster Gold.

Nah.
We're all Wonder Woman.

[Paul McEnery]

Oh. Ok.


I say how-do a fair amount too. As I'm tipping my cowboy hat.

Woofter.
...

[howyadoin]

Heh. I imagine you sitting in your office, bored and desperate for human companionship, acting out your own little CBR threads with your JLU action figures.

I suspect I'm Booster Gold.So which one of them wanted to be honest for a minute?

[Tadhg]

Oh. Ok.


I say how-do a fair amount too. As I'm tipping my cowboy hat.

"Fine Day." is my customary greeting

[Paul McEnery]

Heh. I imagine you sitting in your office, bored and desperate for human companionship, acting out your own little CBR threads with your JLU action figures.

I suspect I'm Booster Gold.
You'd have to be a supervillain.

You're not dead enough to be a hero.

[Typo Lad]

There's a whole frakkin thread about it.


I done been away.

Thank you, that's very sweet, but you don't have to.

If I had to, I wouldn't want to.

Heh. I imagine you sitting in your office, bored and desperate for human companionship, acting out your own little CBR threads with your JLU action figures.

...

I have not done that.

Yet.

I suspect I'm Booster Gold.

"I'd like your autograph, sir."

Nah.
We're all Wonder Woman.

Nah.

Just Ed.

Seriously though, I got so punch-drunk bored at work that I held out my hands like Superman at one point and made "woooosh"ing sounds.

The guy in the office next door and I were laughing about it all day.

[Guapo Méndez]

So which one of them wanted to be honest for a minute?

Nah, when Michael does CBR with action figures, we're all Gnort.

[howyadoin]

"Fine Day." is my customary greetingI figured yours was "what up, bitches?"

[Tadhg]

I figured yours was "what up, bitches?"

Only to people over 75.

[Michael P]

"I'd like your autograph, sir."


Shut up, Morts.

[Paul McEnery]

Shut up, Morts.

"Hey, you're not Green Lantern!"

[Tadhg]

I just want to go on record that if my heart goes missing, Paul McEnery did it.

[Puma]

I just want to go on record that if my heart goes missing, Paul McEnery did it.

you have a heart?

[Tadhg]

you have a heart?

It's in a jar. I don't use it often. I bring it out for special occasions.

[Matt Algren]

My post was delteted over on the DC board, so I'll say it again here.

Bert is a doodie head.

[Tadhg]

My post was delteted over on the DC board, so I'll say it again here.

Bert is a doodie head.

you're so cute.

[Matt Algren]

you're so cute.
I've been working out.

James Lipton indeed!

[Puma]

My post was delteted over on the DC board, so I'll say it again here.

Bert is a doodie head.

oh jeez, queen drama so soon?

[Tadhg]

I've been working out.

James Lipton indeed!

I don't think you look like James Lipton. But he is awesome, and confusion could be caused because of that.

[Matt Algren]

oh jeez, queen drama so soon?
Girl, the claws are OUT!

Seriously, WTF? I made a relatively reasonable post and it was deleted. Noting how quickly after the deletion bert nonchalantly replied, I'm guessing there's some behind the scenes whining going on.

[darkhanamaru]

this jumping between threads to follow the same conversation is making me dizzy

and i think james lipton is hot

[Mac Danny]

So I read that Stupid Comics thread.

Holy Crap, Scott Shaw is the John Byrne of his own mind.

Good to know NO ONE can make fun of comics without paying him tribute.

Morts you better pay up since your WWTT blog is really just derivative of his work.

Every site that makes fun of the printed word owes Scott Shaw! a debt of gratitude. We truly do stand on the shoulders of giants.

[Matt Algren]

I don't think you look like James Lipton. But he is awesome, and confusion could be caused because of that.
Now that you mention it, he did turn in a positively sublime performance on Arrested Development. Then later on Conan O'Brian. I may have to rethink this.

[Tadhg]

this jumping between threads to follow the same conversation is making me dizzy

I just wanted to make sure that if I turn up missing, they should look at Paul as the suspect.


and i think james lipton is hot

Stop hitting on Matt! Didn't you pay attention in the other thread?

[Mac Danny]

Girl, the claws are OUT!

Seriously, WTF? I made a relatively reasonable post and it was deleted. Noting how quickly after the deletion bert nonchalantly replied, I'm guessing there's some behind the scenes whining going on.

Did you call Dan Dido a corn hole licker again? You know you can't keep doing that.

[Ray R.]

So I read that Stupid Comics thread.

Holy Crap, Scott Shaw is the John Byrne of his own mind.

Good to know NO ONE can make fun of comics without paying him tribute.

Morts you better pay up since your WWTT blog is really just derivative of his work.

Every site that makes fun of the printed word owes Scott Shaw! a debt of gratitude. We truly do stand on the shoulders of giants.

Have you seen my legal disclaimer in this week's Cover Contest?

[Tadhg]

Now that you mention it, he did turn in a positively sublime performance on Arrested Development. Then later on Conan O'Brian. I may have to rethink this.

He also wrote Guiding Light

[Michael P]

Wow, Lynne Cheney was a really good sport on the Daily Show last night.

[Mac Danny]

Have you seen my legal disclaimer in this week's Cover Contest?

NOW I UNDERSTAND ALL THE DAMN !!

HUMOR IS COPYRIGHT SCOT SHAW! 2007.

[Mac Danny]

Wow, Lynne Cheney was a really good sport on the Daily Show last night.

In this day and age, if you go on that show without knowing they are going to poke fun at you. Well then you must be Bright Raven..

Sorry, it was just such a good thread today.

[Ed Cunard]

NOW I UNDERSTAND ALL THE DAMN !!

HUMOR IS COPYRIGHT SCOT SHAW! 2007.

Just the unfunny humor, though, right?

[Tadhg]

Just the unfunny humor, though, right?

Unfunny? What?

[Paul McEnery]

It's in a jar. I don't use it often. I bring it out for special occasions.

He lies. He left it in San Francisco.

[Mac Danny]

Just the unfunny humor, though, right?

Both, Unfunny Humor and Unskinny Bop are copyright SCOTT SHAW!

[Tadhg]

He lies. He left it in San Francisco.

I may be there next year for the Apple WWDC. Work is thinking about sending me.

[Paul McEnery]

oh jeez, queen drama so soon?

We told him to get laid. Having a flirty spat is the first step.

[Mac Danny]

He lies. He left it in San Francisco.

With his ass virginity.

[Ed Cunard]

I want special punctuation, too. Dibs on the interrobang.

Ed‽

[Mac Danny]

When are they going to put a chat room up in this mo fo!

SCOTT SHAW! would do it!

[Paul McEnery]

And anyway, I want to know the occasion of the spat.

[Tadhg]

So Paul, you're not allowed to die before next June.

[Paul McEnery]

With his ass virginity.

We don't take ass virgins. We send 'em off to Hollister to be broken in.

[Paul McEnery]

So Paul, you're not allowed to die before next June.

Do my best.

And if I die in June, everybody...

[darkhanamaru]

We don't take ass virgins. We send 'em off to Hollister to be broken in.

i thought it was 850 bryant?

[Ray R.]

When are they going to put a chat room up in this mo fo!

SCOTT SHAW! would do it!

He did the first one. It was at SDCC '77.

He, Sergio, Mark Evanier, and Chuck Rozanski chatted in a room together.

They've all been pale imitations ever since.

[Mac Danny]

I am

MAC DANN¥

[Paul McEnery]

i thought it was 850 bryant?

Hollister. Hell's Angels. Humour. These are all things that begin with the letter H.

[Tadhg]

Do my best.

And if I die in June, everybody...

It'll just mean your heart couldn't take the strain.

[Ray R.]

I am

MAC DANN¥

Ray :rolleyes: .

[Paul McEnery]

I am

MAC DANN¥

Anagram of Man Candy.

[Merey]

I done made two massive batches of cookies.

YEAH!

Chocolate chip? It's been forever since I had homemade chocolate chip cookies.

One batch of chocolate chip with walnuts, the other a batch of choclate and peanut butter chip cookies.

I'll be baking chocolate cookies this weekend as a sooth your heart-break aid. My friend is going through a break-up, so we're having a girls night on Saturday. And good idea Morts, I think I'll do a batch of with chocolate and peanut butter chips.

[Tadhg]

Tadhg Adams¡

[Mac Danny]

He did the first one. It was at SDCC '77.

He, Sergio, Mark Evanier, and Chuck Rozanski chatted in a room together.

They've all been pale imitations ever since.

In fact, Al Gore stole the concept of the internet from HIM! He told Al back in college that he would like to be unfunny to people all over the world without ever having to leave his couch. IF there was a way he could communicate his love of readers digest humor and comics to everyone he would be complete.

He scribbled the code for the first BBB on a worn issue of Teen Romance. As he slept the sleep of the unfunny and righteous, Al took his copy of teen Romance and started the internet!

True Story. © Scott SHAW!

[Tadhg]

Ray :rolleyes: .

Ray wins again.

[Paul McEnery]

It'll just mean your heart couldn't take the strain.

Damn. Your alibi is good.

OTOH, they've already had to cart away three men from my closet for autoasfix... autoasphy... strangling themselves with a boa, so what's one more to Johnny Law?

[Mac Danny]

I'll be baking chocolate cookies this weekend as a sooth your heart-break aid. My friend is going through a break-up, so we're having a girls night on Saturday. And good idea Morts, I think I'll do a batch of with chocolate and peanut butter chips.

Baking cookies better be a euphemism for masturbation to internet porn or I'll be VERY DISSAPOINTED

[Mac Danny]

Ray wins again.

Ray always wins. I'll get you sooner or later Ray! I'll solve the riddle of your R soon enough! MWWWAAHHAHHAHHHAHA!

[Ray R.]

In fact, Al Gore stole the concept of the internet from HIM! He told Al back in college that he would like to be unfunny to people all over the world without ever having to leave his couch. IF there was a way he could communicate his love of readers digest humor and comics to everyone he would be complete.

He scribbled the code for the first BBB on a worn issue of Teen Romance. As he slept the sleep of the unfunny and righteous, Al took his copy of teen Romance and started the internet!

True Story. © Scott SHAW!

Hi-larious. A little too close to Captain Carrot though.

http://www.rd.com/content/openCartoon.do?contentId=600592

[Mac Danny]

I am not going to work tomorrow, Everything I do.. Scot Shaw! did first. Why even bother.

Scott SHAW! can be the new Chuck Norris!

[Michael P]

Baking cookies better be a euphemism for masturbation to internet porn or I'll be VERY DISSAPOINTED

Now, that's just crass.

And so is this:

The only stroked pussy that night will be Hannah.

[Tadhg]

Damn. Your alibi is good.

OTOH, they've already had to cart away three men from my closet for autoasfix... autoasphy... strangling themselves with a boa, so what's one more to Johnny Law?

What'd I tell you about playing with your toys so roughly?

[Tadhg]

I think I'm going to be /Tadhg\ Adams/

[Mac Danny]

Hi-larious. A little too close to Captain Carrot though.

http://www.rd.com/content/openCartoon.do?contentId=600592

Well you know. Beowulf is just stolen from an animation he did for Canadian television. A time traveling Druid from the year 745 saw the animation while staying at a friends in Nova Scotia. He loved it so much he went back in time and wrote Beowulf.

True Story © Scott SHAW!

[Tages]

He lies. He left it in San Francisco.

Speaking of which, have you seen mine? I remember you beginning to chant "Ka-li-maaa, ka-li-MAAAA!" and everything from then to when I got home is a blur.

[Paul McEnery]

What'd I tell you about playing with your toys so roughly?

Um.

It was not me what dun it, ossifer. Look. It was my pet snake, Pumpkin. They was not careful like what they ought to.

[Ed Cunard]

Usually, the only joy I get out of Comic Book Idol is from mockery. This year, though? I looked at the ten finalists and I only saw one that made me thing "seriously? What the fuck?"

[Mac Danny]

Speaking of which, have you seen mine? I remember you beginning to chant "Ka-li-maaa, ka-li-MAAAA!" and everything from then to when I got home is a blur.

INDY Covah yo Haat!

This is too perfect. A pic of the Kid who played short round WITH Tony Bennett!

Double Reference word score of 200!

http://usinfo.state.gov/journals/itsv/0403/images/music/lgpix7.jpg

[Ray R.]

I think I'm going to be /Tadhg\ Adams/

From now on, please address me as:

http://z.about.com/d/altreligion/1/0/h/S/2/stafkap.jpg!

[Paul McEnery]

Now, that's just crass.

And so is this:

The only stroked pussy that night will be Hannah.

Wait, you're shagging Daryl Hannah now? When'd that happen?

[Mac Danny]

Usually, the only joy I get out of Comic Book Idol is from mockery. This year, though? I looked at the ten finalists and I only saw one that made me thing "seriously? What the fuck?"

I find it really hard to follow that contest. Of course, I am not SCOTT SHAW! so a lot of things are over my head.

[Mac Danny]

Wait, you're shagging Daryl Hannah now? When'd that happen?

At least go for Lori Singer.. She's a little younger.

[Tadhg]

From now on, please address me as:

http://z.about.com/d/altreligion/1/0/h/S/2/stafkap.jpg!

I want you to adopt me.

[Tadhg]

Usually, the only joy I get out of Comic Book Idol is from mockery. This year, though? I looked at the ten finalists and I only saw one that made me thing "seriously? What the fuck?"

I can't find the pictures.

[Puma]

I think that's k.d. Lang

Check out the concentration:

http://www.sfgate.com/n/pictures/2007/10/11/mouser2.jpg

[Mac Danny]

Every time I see that War and Heaven thread I think it says war IN heaven.

Now THAT I could get behind.

You know the concept of Heaven was stolen from SCOTT SHAW!

[Paul McEnery]

I will now be addressed as a perfect F# played on a glass harmonica.

[Tadhg]

I think that's k.d. Lang


Isn't that who played Short Round?

[Michael P]

Usually, the only joy I get out of Comic Book Idol is from mockery. This year, though? I looked at the ten finalists and I only saw one that made me thing "seriously? What the fuck?"

Probably the same one as me.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

Usually, the only joy I get out of Comic Book Idol is from mockery. This year, though? I looked at the ten finalists and I only saw one that made me thing "seriously? What the fuck?"

Whats really missing is the buildup to the final 10. I mean come on... AI has those damn losers on that have no chance in hell of being an Idol winner much less fronting a karoake band.

[Ray R.]

http://usinfo.state.gov/journals/itsv/0403/images/music/lgpix7.jpg

What's Jake Gylenhaal doing with Tony Bennett?

[Mac Danny]

I think that's k.d. Lang

Check out the concentration:

http://www.sfgate.com/n/pictures/2007/10/11/mouser2.jpg

Hey I go by what the meta tag says. Even if it is you should cover your heart around her.

[Ed Cunard]

I can't find the pictures.

Here's the first part of the contest (http://cbi.comicbookresources.com/cbi3/round-one-gentlemen-start-your-engines/), which just has links to their samples.

[Matt Algren]

All right, fups. I'm going home.

[Ed Cunard]

Probably the same one as me.

Which one did you scratch your head at? I don't want to go back through all the links figuring it out, because I didn't really bother with names, but I'd know it if I saw it.

[Puma]

Isn't that who played Short Round?

Close. Jonathan Ke Quan.

[Michael P]

Which one did you scratch your head at? I don't want to go back through all the links figuring it out, because I didn't really bother with names, but I'd know it if I saw it.

I'll give you a hint: Big afro.

[Ed Cunard]

I'll give you a hint: Big afro.

Nope. Not the same one.

[Mac Danny]

http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a175/ripplepig/lgpix7.jpg

How's that?

[Paul McEnery]

What's Jake Gylenhaal doing with Tony Bennett?

Singing I Left My Heart In San Francisco. Duh.

[Tadhg]

Hey Lawyer people? Can we bequeath body parts in a will? If so, I'm leaving Paul my spleen.

[Mac Danny]

Nope. Not the same one.

Is it the guy who drew Namor? Cause that Namor is Awful

[Mac Danny]

Hey Lawyer people? Can we bequeath body parts in a will? If so, I'm leaving Paul my spleen.

All your parts belong to SCOTT SHAW! Only he can decide what to do with them.

[Ed Cunard]

Actually, I take it back--I looked at the guy's work again, and I changed my mind--I must have clicked on one of his weaker pages. Overall, he's got chops, too.

[Ray R.]

Singing I Left My Heart In San Francisco. Duh.

I prefer The Best is Yet to Come.

And I Left My Wallet in El Segundo.

[Mac Danny]

The storyline in James Robinson's Starman about the Hawaiian shirt that is a gateway to another dimension is based entirely on SCOTT SHAW!

SCOTT SHAW!'S Hawaiian Shirt can be used as a map of the known universes.

[Paul McEnery]

Hey Lawyer people? Can we bequeath body parts in a will? If so, I'm leaving Paul my spleen.

Le Spleen de Paris? Marveilleux!

[Mac Danny]

I prefer The Best is Yet to Come.

And I Left My Wallet in El Segundo.

Didn't they sing "Welcome to the Taco Bell Signore?" Sung to Hotel California?

[Ray R.]

All your parts belong to SCOTT SHAW! Only he can decide what to do with them.

I'm seeing a 200 part series collected as a coffee table book.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

Actually, I take it back--I looked at the guy's work again, and I changed my mind--I must have clicked on one of his weaker pages. Overall, he's got chops, too.

It should be fun. I know CBR hasn't had a CBI in a long while. I do wish they would have taken my stick figures I submitted seriously. I mean damn it..... one of them was Wolverine !

[howyadoin]

So I think I may need to deliberately invoke the Curse of Rita's.

[Mac Danny]

It should be fun. I know CBR hasn't had a CBI in a long while. I do wish they would have taken my stick figures I submitted seriously. I mean damn it..... one of them was Wolverine !

Gets ya hard does he?

[Paul McEnery]

So I think I may need to deliberately invoke the Curse of Rita's.

Nah. Just refuse to tell her about your secret powers, keep saving her life, but not showing up to dates. That seems to work.

Or I guess you could reveal your secret identity and watch her die instead.

[Puma]

So I think I may need to deliberately invoke the Curse of Rita's.

really? do tell.

[Ray R.]

Didn't they sing "Welcome to the Taco Bell Signore?" Sung to Hotel California?

A Tribe Called Quest?

They did do a song called "The Infamous Date Rape." Wonder who they stole that one from?

[Mac Danny]

So I think I may need to deliberately invoke the Curse of Rita's.

What is this Rita's Curse of which you speak?

All Curses are © SCOTT SHAW! Since it was SCOTT SHAW! who first cursend the creation he called man.

[Tadhg]

So I think I may need to deliberately invoke the Curse of Rita's.

Dish, girlfriend!

[SUPERECWFAN1]

Gets ya hard does he?

Nothin revs my motor like Wolverine #55 . :p

[Michael P]

Nah. Just refuse to tell her about your secret powers, keep saving her life, but not showing up to dates. That seems to work.

Or I guess you could reveal your secret identity and watch her die instead.

Unless she secretly already knows about his powers. In which case, he's screwed until the people reading now are put in positions of editorial power and uncomfortably staring down the twin barrels of middle age and subculturally-ingrained misogyny.

[Tadhg]

Le Spleen de Paris? Marveilleux!

Le Spleen de Rompu

[Ed Cunard]

A Tribe Called Quest?

They did do a song called "The Infamous Date Rape." Wonder who they stole that one from?

Industry rule number four thousand and eighty:
record company people are shady

[Ed Cunard]

So I think I may need to deliberately invoke the Curse of Rita's.

Have you tried "Bitch, I do not like you--step the fuck off" yet?

Or is she the kind of person that would be too subtle for?

[Paul McEnery]

Le Spleen de Rompu

Ah! Ce n'est pas ideal.

[Ray R.]

Unless she secretly already knows about his powers. In which case, he's screwed until the people reading now are put in positions of editorial power and uncomfortably staring down the twin barrels of middle age and subculturally-ingrained misogyny.

I got everything but the editorial power. Sorry, howy.

Gosh-darn-diddily-Didio.



Giggity-giggity.

[Paul McEnery]

Industry rule number four thousand and eighty:
record company people are shady

Though strangely less than slim.

[Michael P]

Gosh-darn-diddily-Didio.


I was actually thinking of someone else.

[Ray R.]

Industry rule number four thousand and eighty:
record company people are shady

Please Hammer, Don't Hurt 'Em

[Ed Cunard]

I anxiously await Q-Tip's new album, which I will purchase with CASH MONEY.

[Paul McEnery]

Unless she secretly already knows about his powers. In which case, he's screwed until the people reading now are put in positions of editorial power and uncomfortably staring down the twin barrels of middle age and subculturally-ingrained misogyny.

No, but wait. He could try really really loving her, but have a friend with a screwed up love life and a bitter vengeful nature.

[Mac Danny]

I'm seeing a 200 part series collected as a coffee table book.

T-SHIRTS.

All your bases Belong to SCOTT SHAW!

http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a175/ripplepig/shaw_steadman.jpg

[Paul McEnery]

I was actually thinking of someone else.

Someone who's a bit cheesed off?

[darkhanamaru]

uuggggggg.....i can't get work done today

[Tadhg]

I anxiously await Q-Tip's new album, which I will purchase with CASH MONEY.

Thief! THIEF!

[Ed Cunard]

Please Hammer, Don't Hurt 'Em

Don't be dissin' my parachute pants
I'm Prince Hamlet, you just Rosencrantz.

[Michael P]

Someone who's a bit cheesed off?

Just an ordinary joe, really.

[Tadhg]

uuggggggg.....i can't get work done today

Do you get to use the computer that you're marketing?

[Michael P]

Don't be dissin' my parachute pants
I'm Prince Hamlet, you just Rosencrantz.

See, if more rap was like that, I'd listen.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

I anxiously await Q-Tip's new album, which I will purchase with CASH MONEY.

I'm waiting on Nov.20th . Thats when Sebastian Bach's new album comes out. Axl Rose and him duet on a few songs. I can't wait to hear "Back in the Saddle" (Aerosmith cover)

[Paul McEnery]

Just an ordinary joe, really.

Is a sloppy joe ordinary?

[Paul McEnery]

See, if more rap was like that, I'd listen.

You been following the Conchords?

[Ray R.]

I was actually thinking of someone else.

Let's see.....what rhymes with Quesada......


Torquemada?

Empanada?

Hello, Muddah, Hello Fadda, Here I am at Camp Grenada?

Padwa?

Nope, I got nothing.

[Mac Danny]

I'm waiting on Nov.20th . Thats when Sebastian Bach's new album comes out. Axl Rose and him duet on a few songs. I can't wait to hear "Back in the Saddle" (Aerosmith cover)

I once saw that song used to soundtrack a girl giving a horse a blow job.

Funny AND Disgusting.

[Ed Cunard]

I'm waiting on Nov.20th . Thats when Sebastian Bach's new album comes out. Axl Rose and him duet on a few songs. I can't wait to hear "Back in the Saddle" (Aerosmith cover)

I have decided that you are Bizarro me. I don't think our tastes have ever aligned on anything.

[Ed Cunard]

I once saw that song used to soundtrack a girl giving a horse a blow job.

Funny AND Disgusting.

I bet. I mean, that song makes me sick.

[Mac Danny]

See, if more rap was like that, I'd listen.

But what is Rap without the Bitches, Hoes, and Money?

Hell they should sample Warren Zevon and make that a Song. Bitches Hoes and Money!

[Tadhg]

I have decided that you are Bizarro me. I don't think our tastes have ever aligned on anything.

Jazz Hands?

[SUPERECWFAN1]

Please Hammer, Don't Hurt 'Em

Don't be dissin DA HAMMER.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iN4Po1b9c5U

[Michael P]

You been following the Conchords?

I've seen bits and pieces.

Which reminds me:

http://img65.imageshack.us/img65/3308/ptmyo9.png

[Mac Danny]

I bet. I mean, that song makes me sick.

very Funny Ed. Funny indeed!

[Deathstroke]

I once saw that song used to soundtrack a girl giving a horse a blow job.

Funny AND Disgusting.

Interesting computer history you must have.

[Michael P]

http://img225.imageshack.us/img225/7729/everytimenj1.png

[Mac Danny]

Goodnight REAL GAMERS wherever you are!

[Ed Cunard]

See, if more rap was like that, I'd listen.

More rap is like that.

[howyadoin]

Nah. Just refuse to tell her about your secret powers, keep saving her life, but not showing up to dates. That seems to work.

Or I guess you could reveal your secret identity and watch her die instead.Now there's an option I hadn't considered.

really? do tell.Well, since you asked: this couple I know split up recently after 8 years together. I've had a little crush on her for most of that time, but it fizzled out pretty quickly when I found out that not only did she cheat on him, but she actually had an ongoing relationship with another guy for most of this past summer, when she went back East, ostensibly to visit her family during some crisis or other.

The thing is, though, I still think she's stupendously hot. And there has been the odd bit of flirting from time to time.

Anyhow, I got home from work just now to find a voicemail from her. Apparently there's something she wants to ask me about. (Keep in mind that in all the years I've known her, we've never had a phone conversation or even traded e-mails. Also keep in mind that I had a bit of a fling with her older sister back in the early 90s.)




So. Other than mutual friends, we don't have a whole lot in common. So is she phoning because she wants to vent about her ex, who's a good friend of mine? Phoning with some ulterior motive in mind? I'm running through the options in my head, and I can't come up with a single "casual" reason why she'd phone me out of the blue like this. Graphic design work is the closest, but she's still in college, so what coukd she possibly need?

Anyhow, sooner or later I'm gonna have to return this call, and I don't wanna come out of this whole situation being the bad guy in any way.

[Deathstroke]

But what is Rap without the Bitches, Hoes, and Money?

Hell they should sample Warren Zevon and make that a Song. Bitches Hoes and Money!

Please do not ever take The Zevon's name in vain again and use it in any sentence referencing rap.

[Michael P]

http://img223.imageshack.us/img223/1105/greatshowsaj7.png

[Ray R.]

I'm waiting on Nov.20th . Thats when Sebastian Bach's new album comes out. Axl Rose and him duet on a few songs. I can't wait to hear "Back in the Saddle" (Aerosmith cover)

Really? Really?

Hasn't the blood pact Axl signed with Satan come up for close-out yet?

[Michael P]

http://img223.imageshack.us/img223/8048/menvswomen1cv7.gif

[SUPERECWFAN1]

I once saw that song used to soundtrack a girl giving a horse a blow job.

Funny AND Disgusting.


HA HA HA ..it does sound funny.

I have decided that you are Bizarro me. I don't think our tastes have ever aligned on anything.

Hmmmm maybe one day something we'll have a similar taste on. I'm a rock/metal fan.... I like some hip hop. I was huge into Hammer when he came out all those years ago. I don't really know who Q-Tip is.

[Michael P]

http://img223.imageshack.us/img223/8757/sanitymh4.png

[Tadhg]

Really? Really?

Hasn't the blood pact Axl signed with Satan come up for close-out yet?

December 21, 2012.

[Michael P]

Don't worry, this is the last one:

http://img292.imageshack.us/img292/3579/monthcrueltychartnn1.png

[howyadoin]

You are some seriously weird motherfuckers.

[Ray R.]

Don't be dissin DA HAMMER.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iN4Po1b9c5U

Wow, that's shitty on even metaphysical levels.

[Paul McEnery]

Let's see.....what rhymes with Quesada......


Torquemada?

Empanada?

Hello, Muddah, Hello Fadda, Here I am at Camp Grenada?

Padwa?

Nope, I got nothing.

Hello, my name is Joe Quesada
I claim to entertain, that's my facade
But I inflict pain like the Marquis de Sade
And more people die in vain than the Jews at Masada

[SUPERECWFAN1]

Really? Really?

Hasn't the blood pact Axl signed with Satan come up for close-out yet?

I can't wait to hear him. I have all the leaks , so something new will be good. Im no fan of Bach but ...I'll make do.

[darkhanamaru]

Anyhow, sooner or later I'm gonna have to return this call, and I don't wanna come out of this whole situation being the bad guy in any way.

I have always found out that not returning the call is the best option. If it is really important and not just flirty they'll call back and you'll get more information in the second call.


Anyway sounds like it could be a situation to avoid.

[Tadhg]

You are some seriously weird motherfuckers.

Lies. Nothing serious about us.

[Gingold]

Shouldn't Axl get Chinese Democracy completed before singing on the horse blow job soundtrack thing?

[Paul McEnery]

Now there's an option I hadn't considered.

Well, since you asked: this couple I know split up recently after 8 years together. I've had a little crush on her for most of that time, but it fizzled out pretty quickly when I found out that not only did she cheat on him, but she actually had an ongoing relationship with another guy for most of this past summer, when she went back East, ostensibly to visit her family during some crisis or other.

The thing is, though, I still think she's stupendously hot. And there has been the odd bit of flirting from time to time.

Anyhow, I got home from work just now to find a voicemail from her. Apparently there's something she wants to ask me about. (Keep in mind that in all the years I've known her, we've never had a phone conversation or even traded e-mails. Also keep in mind that I had a bit of a fling with her older sister back in the early 90s.)




So. Other than mutual friends, we don't have a whole lot in common. So is she phoning because she wants to vent about her ex, who's a good friend of mine? Phoning with some ulterior motive in mind? I'm running through the options in my head, and I can't come up with a single "casual" reason why she'd phone me out of the blue like this. Graphic design work is the closest, but she's still in college, so what coukd she possibly need?

Anyhow, sooner or later I'm gonna have to return this call, and I don't wanna come out of this whole situation being the bad guy in any way.

Well, shag her then.

But take pictures of her with your come all over her face so she has to keep her mouth shut.

[howyadoin]

I have always found out that not returning the call is the best option. If it is really important and not just flirty they'll call back and you'll get more information in the second call.


Anyway sounds like it could be a situation to avoid.Hmm. That's a good point, and better advice than mini-me is giving me right now.

[Ray R.]

Well, since you asked: this couple I know split up recently after 8 years together. I've had a little crush on her for most of that time, but it fizzled out pretty quickly when I found out that not only did she cheat on him, but she actually had an ongoing relationship with another guy for most of this past summer, when she went back East, ostensibly to visit her family during some crisis or other.

The thing is, though, I still think she's stupendously hot. And there has been the odd bit of flirting from time to time.

Anyhow, I got home from work just now to find a voicemail from her. Apparently there's something she wants to ask me about. (Keep in mind that in all the years I've known her, we've never had a phone conversation or even traded e-mails. Also keep in mind that I had a bit of a fling with her older sister back in the early 90s.)

So. Other than mutual friends, we don't have a whole lot in common. So is she phoning because she wants to vent about her ex, who's a good friend of mine? Phoning with some ulterior motive in mind? I'm running through the options in my head, and I can't come up with a single "casual" reason why she'd phone me out of the blue like this. Graphic design work is the closest, but she's still in college, so what coukd she possibly need?

Anyhow, sooner or later I'm gonna have to return this call, and I don't wanna come out of this whole situation being the bad guy in any way.

Bolded for emphasis and shock value.

No good can come of this. I'd return the call, but not agree to meet. If you have to meet, make it as public as possible, so you can run like hell, if the going gets rough.

[Tadhg]

Shouldn't Axl get Chinese Democracy completed before singing on the horse blow job soundtrack thing?

Doesn't that imply that he should complete Chinese Democracy? I'm not grokking that.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

Wow, that's shitty on even metaphysical levels.

Well heres Hammer when he went all thug....


Pumps in a Bump
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxp6W12QQbE


Yes I am EVIL.....:evilsmile

[darkhanamaru]

Well, shag her then.

But take pictures of her with your come all over her face so she has to keep her mouth shut.

paul,

this is when i am going to remind you are not a person to be giving out this type of information

[Tadhg]

Hmm. That's a good point, and better advice than mini-me is giving me right now.

How hot is stupendously?

[Ray R.]

Im no fan of Bach but ...I'll make do.

You're not helping your case, you know.

[howyadoin]

Well, shag her then.

But take pictures of her with your come all over her face so she has to keep her mouth shut.Yeah, that's pretty much what mini-me is saying.

Bolded for emphasis and shock value.

No good can come of this. I'd return the call, but not agree to meet. If you have to meet, make it as public as possible, so you can run like hell, if the going gets rough.You'd make a great lawyer, Plucky Newcomer.

And I definitely don't want her coming over here in, say, a short skirt and a tight sweater.

[Michael P]

And I definitely don't want her coming over here in, say, a short skirt and a tight sweater.

Solution: Send her to my place.

[Tadhg]

paul,

this is when i am going to remind you are not a person to be giving out this type of information

Dish girlfriend!

[SUPERECWFAN1]

Shouldn't Axl get Chinese Democracy completed before singing on the horse blow job soundtrack thing?

According to Bach , he sang on a few CD songs for Rose and to repay the favor he wanted Rose on a few of his songs. By now even I doubt Chinese Democracy will ever happen. I have the leaks thus far.....til he ever decides to release the album.

[darkhanamaru]

Dish girlfriend!

oh i'll leave that up to paul

[darkhanamaru]

god! i hate that people are working late. this is when i like to get shit done.

no afterwork drinking for me...

[Paul McEnery]

Dish girlfriend!

See, I'm handing out advice on the one little detail on the perfect plan that I forgot to implement.

[Paul McEnery]

Solution: Send her to my place.

Yup.

That should quiet her down a tad.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

You're not helping your case, you know.

Buying an album for a guy singing on 3 to 4 songs ? Whats wrong with that.

Maybe Bach will impress me. I haven't really heard anything of his solo work. I do have Skid Rows greatest hits put away somewhere.

[howyadoin]

How hot is stupendously?She's a perky little brunette in her late 20s who works out on regular basis and has a phone voice like a little girl.

Also, bubble ass.

[Paul McEnery]

Buying an album for a guy singing on 3 to 4 songs ? Whats wrong with that.

Maybe Bach will impress me. I haven't really heard anything of his solo work. I do have Skid Rows greatest hits put away somewhere.

It's in that glass case behind your desk. Marked "in case of absolutely nothing at all I can think of, break glass."

[Tadhg]

She's a perky little brunette in her late 20s who works out on regular basis and has a phone voice like a little girl.

Also, bubble ass.

Call her now.

[howyadoin]

She's a perky little brunette in her late 20s who works out on regular basis and has a phone voice like a little girl.

Also, bubble ass.P.S. Her part-time job is working at a Mac dealer.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

She's a perky little brunette in her late 20s who works out on regular basis and has a phone voice like a little girl.

Also, bubble ass.

You sold me......Go for it Howy and thanks for sharing with us.

[Ray R.]

You'd make a great lawyer, Plucky Newcomer.

Too douchebaggy. I want to give my art to the world for free.


And I definitely don't want her coming over here in, say, a short skirt and a tight sweater.

Nope. If you could give her the old in-and-out with no repercussions, I'd say give it the old college try, but your x-factors here of good friend and older sister, and her questionable past history forecast potential hassles, long past the time the cum is dry. Or so it appears from my perspective.

Path of least resistance doesn't lead to your apartment. Keep it public, if at all.

Discipline, my friend.

[Paul McEnery]

She's a perky little brunette in her late 20s who works out on regular basis and has a phone voice like a little girl.

Also, bubble ass.

Clearly the only person who will have to endure the consequences of this going horribly wrong is you. And the people who will be entertained will be us.

I'm not seeing the problem here.

[Gingold]

I think you need to hit that, yo.

[Tadhg]

P.S. Her part-time job is working at a Mac dealer.

What Ray said. Do her in public.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

It's in that glass case behind your desk. Marked "in case of absolutely nothing at all I can think of, break glass."

Yep.... basically. I play a wide array of music to and from work. I haven't played it in a long...long time. Its put up in the....well its there section. I play The Monkees more than it oddly.

[Ray R.]

I do have Skid Rows greatest hits put away somewhere.

And.....that's three strikes. The batter is retired.

[Paul McEnery]

Path of least resistance doesn't lead to your apartment. Keep it public, if at all.

Discipline, my friend.

I don't see how disciplining her in public is going to keep him out of trouble.

[Puma]

She's a perky little brunette in her late 20s who works out on regular basis and has a phone voice like a little girl.

Also, bubble ass.
meet in public, not at a bar, not unless you no longer want her ex as a good friend.

[howyadoin]

Nope. If you could give her the old in-and-out with no repercussions, I'd say give it the old college try, but your x-factors here of good friend and older sister, and her questionable past history forecast potential hassles, long past the time the cum is dry. Or so it appears from my perspective.

Path of least resistance doesn't lead to your apartment. Keep it public, if at all.

Discipline, my friend.Shit, McGee's buddy Meyer was right.

Clearly the only person who will have to endure the consequences of this going horribly wrong is you. And the people who will be entertained will be us.

I'm not seeing the problem here.You're not helping, porkie.

[darkhanamaru]

.....has a phone voice like a little girl.


ug, i can't stand women who talk like little girls. usually i find it indicates a maturity problem and they cause nothing but problems for me.

but then again, while i will objectify women, i generally find most women under 30 annoying. after 30, they either move into the kids and marriage phase and grow up; stop being attractive to men and realize they need to find more meaning then that in their lives; or find drive.

That said, i like all the women i currently work with. They are cool, smart, not self-obsessed and mature.

[darkhanamaru]

I don't see how disciplining her in public is going to keep him out of trouble.

for a bottom you talk a lot porkie...

[SUPERECWFAN1]

And.....that's three strikes. The batter is retired.

I'm a hair metal fan...guilty as charged your honor....

[howyadoin]

meet in public, not at a bar, not unless you no longer want her ex as a good friend.Or hopefully she just wants advice on a good bottle of Scotch, or tips on head-shaving.

[Tadhg]

for a bottom you talk a lot porkie...

Bottom? More ruined fantasies.

[Puma]

Or hopefully she just wants advice on a good bottle of Scotch, or tips on head-shaving.

riiiigggghhhhtttt.

[Ray R.]

Shit, McGee's buddy Meyer was right.



Just Meyer, please, Travis.

[Michael P]

Or hopefully she just wants advice on a good bottle of Scotch, or tips on head-shaving.

So, what color do you want the pony Santa's bringing you for Christmas to be?

[Pól Rua]

Mornin' munkies.
Boy, we certainly had a snarky ol' evening, didn't we?

[Tadhg]

meet in public, not at a bar, not unless you no longer want her ex as a good friend.

What about prior disclosure? Tell the friend about the crazy ex wanting to jump howy's bones, then when it happens in a public place, it can be forgiven.

[Paul McEnery]

riiiigggghhhhtttt.

Hey baby. Yeah, that's right. Let me freshen up that drink for you. Now I'm going to run my fingers through your hair. Oh, now why would a sweet thing like you want to cut this hair off...

[howyadoin]

So, what color do you want the pony Santa's bringing you for Christmas to be?Well ideally, she just found out she has a twin sister who was given up for adoption...

[Puma]

Mornin' munkies.
Boy, we certainly had a snarky ol' evening, didn't we?

you really missed the snarky morning.

[darkhanamaru]

Bottom? More ruined fantasies.

maybe you can get him to top from the bottom for you.

[Ray R.]

you really missed the snarky morning.

It was snarkariffic.

Poor little banned guy.

[Ray R.]

maybe you can get him to top from the bottom for you.

Is pegging as fun for you as it is for him?

[Tadhg]

It was snarkariffic.

Poor little banned guy.

Hit or Stay, Big Chief DoubleDown?

[Tadhg]

Is pegging as fun for you as it is for him?

Things one shouldn't google.

[Paul McEnery]

Is pegging as fun for you as it is for him?

We go for level pegging with the double header.

[darkhanamaru]

Is pegging as fun for you as it is for him?

um....

i had to look that one up so i guess not :)

[Tadhg]

We go for level pegging with the double header.

Things I don't know how to google.

[Ray R.]

Hit or Stay, Big Chief DoubleDown?

Stay, kemo sabe. And where's my free firewater, paleface? Come on brick. Daddy needs a new pair of moccasins.

-- Ray Doublesdown-Often

[Paul McEnery]

Things I don't know how to google.

What?

We play a couple of hands of crib. You got something else in mind?

[Tadhg]

What?

We play a couple of hands of crib. You got something else in mind?

No. Because I don't understand what's going on.

[Paul McEnery]

No. Because I don't understand what's going on.

And that's just the way we like our puppy, don't we.

Roll over.

[darkhanamaru]

And that's just the way we like our puppy, don't we.

Roll over.

and our porkie. :)

[Tadhg]

And that's just the way we like our puppy, don't we.

Roll over.

I need alcohol before I perform tricks.

[howyadoin]

I did think of a semi-plausible reason for the call. She hasn't moved out of their apartment yet, so maybe she needs a hand.

[howyadoin]

I need alcohol before I perform tricks.http://i26.photobucket.com/albums/c109/partytillyoupuke/San%20Diego%202005/27215297_182060fe8b_o.jpg

[Ray R.]

http://i26.photobucket.com/albums/c109/partytillyoupuke/San%20Diego%202005/27215297_182060fe8b_o.jpg

What is that: "Playing Dead?"

[howyadoin]

What is that: "Playing Dead?"That's what he does when you say "stay".

[Stellar]

I watched Good Luck Chuck last night. I'll admit, it had it's moments, but they were few and far between. At one point it looked like a softcore porno which was kind of a 'wtf?' moment, but hey. The premise had potential, but it was killed by bad jokes and, overall, a script that wasn't polished enough.

[Tadhg]

If I run for Office on a hard right morality platform, you guys will all forget these pictures exist, right?

[Tadhg]

What is that: "Playing Dead?"

Playing Dead was when I was sitting in my wife's wheel chair and flipped it.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

I did think of a semi-plausible reason for the call. She hasn't moved out of their apartment yet, so maybe she needs a hand.

Possibly but as you said you 2 have never exchanged private convos. It would put you in a funny situation since your a friend of the dude she's leaving. and you help her move.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

I watched Good Luck Chuck last night. I'll admit, it had it's moments, but they were few and far between. At one point it looked like a softcore porno which was kind of a 'wtf?' moment, but hey. The premise had potential, but it was killed by bad jokes and, overall, a script that wasn't polished enough.

I love REAPER. I admit I enjoy the poor smuck who has to work his debt off for Satan.

[howyadoin]

Possibly but as you said you 2 have never exchanged private convos. It would put you in a funny situation since your a friend of the dude she's leaving. and you help her move.Plus it sounds like the premise for a porno movie.

[Ray R.]

I watched Good Luck Chuck last night.....

That's as far as I could get. Sorry.

[Winslow]

My parents live so close you can hear the people cheer from the stadium, that is if they cheered anymore.

Silence near the golden dome really is golden.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

Plus it sounds like the premise for a porno movie.

Hmmmm a 3 way for Howy ? ;)

[Stellar]

I love REAPER. I admit I enjoy the poor smuck who has to work his debt off for Satan.

I read about, haven't seen the pilot yet. The concept's a bit old, but the script may surprise us yet.

[Gingold]

That's as far as I could get. Sorry.

Shouldn't Dane Cook be a waiter at a TGI Friday's somewhere? I don't understand why anyone would pay to see him.

[Stellar]

At some point his acting seemed like a cross between Rowan Atkinson and Jim Carrey. And it was done rather poorly. I think he just tries too hard.

[Tadhg]

Shouldn't Dane Cook be a waiter at a TGI Friday's somewhere? I don't understand why anyone would pay to see him.

Apparently he's hilarious. But then I don't understand most comedy.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

I read about, haven't seen the pilot yet. The concept's a bit old, but the script may surprise us yet.

Give it a watch. You may enjoy it. The only show im really following beyond South Park at the moment.

[howyadoin]

Apparently he's hilarious. But then I don't understand most comedy.Nobody who thinks he's hilarious understands comedy.

[Elegance Liberty]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aL49NICf1tM

^ This is the single greatest video ever.

Make sure your volume is turned up, it's a quiet video.

[Ed Cunard]

Don't worry, this is the last one:

http://img292.imageshack.us/img292/3579/monthcrueltychartnn1.png

I love this so, so much.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

Shouldn't Dane Cook be a waiter at a TGI Friday's somewhere? I don't understand why anyone would pay to see him.

He;s the luckiest damn bastard walking gods green Earth. He got to act next to Jessica Alba in her panties and all. I hate the guys comedy but he's just a lucky damn bastard.

[Tadhg]

Dane Cook has a nice suit.

[Chris Nowlin]

I love this so, so much.

I'm really surprised Valentine's Day doesn't give February points.

[Stellar]

Honestly, I don't know why Alba signed on. She must've read the script.

[Ed Cunard]

I'm really surprised Valentine's Day doesn't give February points.

I can't tell if you didn't get it, or if the joke is that you didn't get it because you are Captain Math Nerd, not Captain Literature Nerd.

[Tadhg]

Honestly, I don't know why Alba signed on. She must've read the script.

Agent told her to? Likes the money? Wants to make howy jealous?

[Tadhg]

I can't tell if you didn't get it, or if the joke is that you didn't get it because you are Captain Math Nerd, not Captain Literature Nerd.

I would put my Dr. Who collection on the former.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

Nobody who thinks he's hilarious understands comedy.

I've always been a Norm McDonald fan more than a Dane Cook one. Sadly I recently saw Norm and he's packed on some weight.

[howyadoin]

I'm really surprised Valentine's Day doesn't give February points.Fake cash-grab holidays have nothing to do with true love, "Chris".