Who should Spidey marry next?

[Kid Kyoto]

Now that the Spider Divorce is almost a done deal –

And let me say, good show Peter. Most guys when they dump their high school sweetheart, wife of 20 years, mother of his child, they’d be pretty discrete about it but you, you don’t just walk you, you erase her memory AND everyone else in the whole world! That’s hard core man, hard core.

- anyway obviously Marvel is not going to turn their #1 icon into a poster boy for premarital sex and casual hook-ups.

And just as obviously Marvel is not going to turn him into some loser who spends his weekends downloading internet pr0n.

So they’ll have to get him married off again ASAP but this time do it right.

Here are some possibilities I see:

Jean Grey – Comic artists have to draw dozens of different characters each week, by pairing off Peter with another busty redhead they could save their hardworking artists tons of time learning to draw a new character. Plus they can keep selling the same t-shirts and statues just by changing the name on them.

Psylocke – Both she and Peter are like triple jointed or something. Their wedding night could be covered in 12 part story arc with diagrams and manuals.

That dog chick from New Mutants – She has some foreign name I can’t remember, but if they paired them off it would be like, a dog and a spider, IN BED! It would be awesome!

That chick from Sins Past – For like years old fans have been whining about Gwen Stacey but she’s dead. Marrying Peter off to her clone/daughter/whatever would be just like having Gwen back AND it would bring back on of the most talked-about new characters in years.

That chick from the Match.com commercials – She’s hot.

Prince Namor – Since he was introduced Peter has shown stereotypical gay traits like exhibitionism, awkwardness around girls, interest in photography and an unhealthy obsession with his mother figure. Taking him out of the closet and pairing him off with Marvel’s #1 gay icon is a move people would be talking about for years!

Aunt May – If he f@#$ing loves her that much why not marry her! ARG! STUPID STUPID MARVEL!

Sorry… broke character there. :D

Anyway what do y'all think.

[scouse mouse]

A polygamist civil union with Namor, Northstar and D Man would be GREAT!

[SpideyZERO]

JQ wants Spidey for himself

[SilverWebs]

I vote for necromancy. That way, JQ won't have to kill off the character to end the marriage. She's already dead. Sweet deal.

[a-spidey]

when they really turn the marvel universe upside down so that the marriage is over i dont think they want him a husband again anytime soon.

[Kid Kyoto]

when they really turn the marvel universe upside down so that the marriage is over i dont think they want him a husband again anytime soon.

So you're in the casual hook-up, anonymous sex camp then?

I can see that.

But I think that girl for him might be the Wasp. I'm not a big Avengers fan but doesn't the Wasp turn into an insect like a fly or something? That would be cool cause like Spidey would be wanting to eat her. Plus I hear she likes it when her man slaps her around, so Spidey can teach the fans an important lesson about keeping a strong pimp hand over your woman.

[SUPERECWFAN1]

Considering how bad this was and is.... as a retcon the whole erasing everyones mind (stolen from what Wally West as the Flash did 4 years ago) I vote for no one. Since they have ruined the character a lot. I can't wait to see what happens if Spiderman got close to another woman ..... time to call Dr.Strange and warp her mind I suppose.

[Rere]

Here are some possibilities I see:

Jean Grey – Comic artists have to draw dozens of different characters each week, by pairing off Peter with another busty redhead they could save their hardworking artists tons of time learning to draw a new character. Plus they can keep selling the same t-shirts and statues just by changing the name on them.

Only if Peter became an X-Men too! I mean, he was reborn from a cocoon just a few months ago! That's gotta be enough to qualify him as a mutant from now on, right?

Psylocke – Both she and Peter are like triple jointed or something. Their wedding night could be covered in 12 part story arc with diagrams and manuals.

Oh good choice!

And Spidey would never cheat on her!

She has a psychic katana after all! And you just don't mess with girls that have a psychic katana.

Darn. I wish I had a psychic katana…

That dog chick from New Mutants – She has some foreign name I can’t remember, but if they paired them off it would be like, a dog and a spider, IN BED! It would be awesome!

I have no idea who that one would be but since we are going for the insect pairing-up thing here, isn't there by any chance a female mutant that have powers based on a praying mantis? Imagine all the drama that could create?! Spidey would marry a woman whom very true nature lies (literally) on sexual cannibalism!

That chick from Sins Past – For like years old fans have been whining about Gwen Stacey but she’s dead. Marrying Peter off to her clone/daughter/whatever would be just like having Gwen back AND it would bring back on of the most talked-about new characters in years.

Sarah? Well, here is the problem… even with her 'rapid growth' (progeria-based) thingie, technically, and at least according to her birth certificate wouldn't she be a minor? Like a 6-9 years old kid?

If he married her, the police would go after him again, but this time with a different charge. And I'd sure hope they would catch him for this offense!

That chick from the Match.com commercials – She’s hot.

I wouldn't know, but I'll take your word on it.

Any chance that if we go with her we can eventually throw her out of a bridge too? You know? Kind of part of the 'baptism' routine for all Spidey girls?

Please?

Prince Namor – Since he was introduced Peter has shown stereotypical gay traits like exhibitionism, awkwardness around girls, interest in photography and an unhealthy obsession with his mother figure. Taking him out of the closet and pairing him off with Marvel’s #1 gay icon is a move people would be talking about for years!

They would make a cute couple indeed.

Electro is single too. And oficially bi.

Aunt May – If he f@#$ing loves her that much why not marry her! ARG! STUPID STUPID MARVEL!

Sorry… broke character there. :D

Best. Option. Ever.

[Sonicjuce]

Electro is single too. And oficially bi.
Is he "officially" bi? I thought that was just an offhand comment for humor, nothing more. If I remember when the New Avengers found him he was trying very hard to get a waitress to run away with him.

[Rere]

Is he "officially" bi?

Nah. Probably not.

But then again, there are quite a few hints of his possible bisexuality, so technically he would be a character that wouldn't need any type of 'retcon' on his sexual preference to fit the bill as Spidey's new love interest!

It's all in pro of a fluid continuity!

[CapnCaveman]

Flash Thompson. It's legal in many states now and you just know there was always some chemistry there. Of course Peter would totally be the catcher.

[the_hood]

spidey bi??? heck no way! imagine, peter and brock! hahah!

[Omega Alpha]

The corpse of Gwen Stacy.

[Jinxer]

Black Cat, c'mon!

[Chris Nowlin]

I really, really want Monica Rambeau






for Spidey, I mean.

[Sonicjuce]

Why not have him move to Utah and marry Randi, Candi, and Bambi?

[Jinxer]

Why not have him move to Utah and marry Randi, Candi, and Bambi?

I like the way you think.

[Mister Mets]

Now that the Spider Divorce is almost a done deal –

And let me say, good show Peter. Most guys when they dump their high school sweetheart, wife of 20 years, mother of his child, they’d be pretty discrete about it but you, you don’t just walk you, you erase her memory AND everyone else in the whole world! That’s hard core man, hard core.

- anyway obviously Marvel is not going to turn their #1 icon into a poster boy for premarital sex and casual hook-ups.

And just as obviously Marvel is not going to turn him into some loser who spends his weekends downloading internet pr0n.

So they’ll have to get him married off again ASAP but this time do it right.

Here are some possibilities I see:

Jean Grey – Comic artists have to draw dozens of different characters each week, by pairing off Peter with another busty redhead they could save their hardworking artists tons of time learning to draw a new character. Plus they can keep selling the same t-shirts and statues just by changing the name on them.

Psylocke – Both she and Peter are like triple jointed or something. Their wedding night could be covered in 12 part story arc with diagrams and manuals.

That dog chick from New Mutants – She has some foreign name I can’t remember, but if they paired them off it would be like, a dog and a spider, IN BED! It would be awesome!

That chick from Sins Past – For like years old fans have been whining about Gwen Stacey but she’s dead. Marrying Peter off to her clone/daughter/whatever would be just like having Gwen back AND it would bring back on of the most talked-about new characters in years.

That chick from the Match.com commercials – She’s hot.

Prince Namor – Since he was introduced Peter has shown stereotypical gay traits like exhibitionism, awkwardness around girls, interest in photography and an unhealthy obsession with his mother figure. Taking him out of the closet and pairing him off with Marvel’s #1 gay icon is a move people would be talking about for years!

Aunt May – If he f@#$ing loves her that much why not marry her! ARG! STUPID STUPID MARVEL!

Sorry… broke character there. :D

Anyway what do y'all think.
Mary Jane is not Peter's high school sweetheart. The fact that anyone who reads the comics believes this is one more small reason to end the marriage. Incidentally, it's not a divorce. Many fans (I am not included in that catefory) would prefer an actual divorce to a magic retcon.

If the marriage is coming to an end, Spider-Man should not get married again, until the higher-ups at Marvel decide that the 616 universe is coming to an end: Then he can marry MJ again.

The premarital sex thing won't be a problem for two reasons.
1- It wasn't a problem before Peter & MJ got married.
2- Premarital sex is considered the norm. Did anyone complain that Johnny Storm made jokes about the Thing & Alicia Masters' sex life in the second Fantastic Four movie? There was a lot worth complaining about in the film, but that was one detail no one cared about.

[Chris Nowlin]

Mary Jane is not Peter's high school sweetheart. The fact that anyone who reads the comics believes this is one more small reason to end the marriage. Incidentally, it's not a divorce. Many fans (I am not included in that catefory) would prefer an actual divorce to a magic retcon.

I vote against divorce. I'm ambivalent toward a magic retcon but I see the possibilities and wouldn't object.

And every true Spider-fan knows his high school sweetheart was Gwen (do note the sarcasm; I've actually read a couple comics)

If the marriage is coming to an end, Spider-Man should not get married again, until the higher-ups at Marvel decide that the 616 universe is coming to an end: Then he can marry MJ again.

Booo...

Captain Marvel!



The premarital sex thing won't be a problem for two reasons.
1- It wasn't a problem before Peter & MJ got married.
2- Premarital sex is considered the norm. Did anyone complain that Johnny Storm made jokes about the Thing & Alicia Masters' sex life in the second Fantastic Four movie? There was a lot worth complaining about in the film, but that was one detail no one cared about.

Besides it would be postmarital sex now and everybody's okay with that.

Oh... unless there's a magic retcon

[Rere]

Mary Jane is not Peter's high school sweetheart. The fact that anyone who reads the comics believes this is one more small reason to end the marriage. Incidentally, it's not a divorce. Many fans (I am not included in that catefory) would prefer an actual divorce to a magic retcon.

If the marriage is coming to an end, Spider-Man should not get married again, until the higher-ups at Marvel decide that the 616 universe is coming to an end: Then he can marry MJ again.

The premarital sex thing won't be a problem for two reasons.
1- It wasn't a problem before Peter & MJ got married.
2- Premarital sex is considered the norm. Did anyone complain that Johnny Storm made jokes about the Thing & Alicia Masters' sex life in the second Fantastic Four movie? There was a lot worth complaining about in the film, but that was one detail no one cared about.

You always take everything people say here seriously, don't you?

I dunno... perhaps you should consider lighting up a bit.

Not every subject around these boards are to be taken seriously. As a matter of fact, this is a comic book forum, so I'd dare say that actually nothing here is meant to be taken too seriously.

But what would I know, right? To each its own, I suppose.

[Chris Nowlin]

You always take everything people say here seriously, don't you?

I dunno... perhaps you should consider lighting up a bit.

Not every subject around these boards are to be taken seriously. As a matter of fact, this is a comic book forum, so I'd dare say that actually nothing here is meant to be taken too seriously.

But what would I know? To each its own, I suppose.

If anything in life should be taken seriously, it's Spider-Man.

Everything else... laugh away

[Rere]

If anything in life should be taken seriously, it's Spider-Man.

Everything else... laugh away

I actually try to take Spider-Man serious too!

But then I think of the Walrus, Frog-Man and the Hypno-Hustler (which are, like, the best characters ever!) and it's a lost cause.

I'm still working on it though.

[Chris Nowlin]

I take Frog Man seriously

[Kyle_Ion]

I haven't read any of the spider man series but he could always marry the black cat.

[Chris Nowlin]

Black Cat just wasn't one for commitment. I think he should just have fun with her between marriages

[Rere]

I take Frog Man seriously

And who would dare not to?!

http://img123.imageshack.us/img123/2915/frogman3vm6.jpg

[Kyle_Ion]

Black Cat just wasn't one for commitment. I think he should just have fun with her between marriages

or never get married and have her become his mistress.

[Mister Mets]

You always take everything people say here seriously, don't you?

I dunno... perhaps you should consider lighting up a bit.

Not every subject around these boards are to be taken seriously. As a matter of fact, this is a comic book forum, so I'd dare say that actually nothing here is meant to be taken too seriously.

But what would I know, right? To each its own, I suppose.
I may have been out of line. My apologies.


I thought Kid Kyoto was quoting someone in italics on the first post.

Er, he wasn't, was he?

[Trey]

Lockjaw.......in a special 'nuff said issue....no dialog.....drawn by Jae Lee

[Kid Kyoto]

I may have been out of line. My apologies.


I thought Kid Kyoto was quoting someone in italics on the first post.

Er, he wasn't, was he?

Actually the italics were meant to indicate an aside. They were my own words.

[witchboy]

I vote for Flash Thompson too . Reading the high school era stories , Flash 's obsession with teasing Peter totally comes off as a frustrated crush .
But since realistically Marvel will never let Spidey be gay , then let him start his romance with MJ over , just not rush into marriage right away.

[Kid Kyoto]

Well the first time he waited a good 10, 20 years before marrying.

The sad thing is that IIRC the marriage happened because Stan and John Romita (who at the time were doing the newspaper stirp) wanted it to.

So this whole idea that he shouldn't have married is going against the wishes of two his main creators.

Anyway, less seriously, I think Flash would be a good foil, always trying to win Peter away from Namor.

[Kid Kyoto]

Incidentally, it's not a divorce. Many fans (I am not included in that catefory) would prefer an actual divorce to a magic retcon.



Well he's decided he has more important things going on than being with his wife so though the mechanism is different he's basically tossing her on the curb. The fact that he's making her and all his friends forget it ever happened is just something all divorced men wish they could do. ;)

It is the dump of all dumps. A dump so thorough it twists time and space.

More like the Spider Anulment I guess.

Is Peter Catholic?

[worstblogever]

Sarah? Well, here is the problem… even with her 'rapid growth' (progeria-based) thingie, technically, and at least according to her birth certificate wouldn't she be a minor? Like a 6-9 years old kid?

If he married her, the police would go after him again, but this time with a different charge. And I'd sure hope they would catch him for this offense!


It'd give J. Jonah a great excuse to yell out, "Spider-Man's a menace!" though. Issues follow with great Daily Bugle headlines about S-pedo-rman.

[twofacefan]

Spider-Women, then they could have crazy spider sex an shit :rolleyes:

[witchboy]

So I guess this also takes baby May out of continuity once and for all too? I get my comics shipped to me ,so I 'm behind on my reading .Does it actually change the past , or just people's memories ?

[SilverWebs]

So I guess this also takes baby May out of continuity once and for all too? I get my comics shipped to me ,so I 'm behind on my reading .Does it actually change the past , or just people's memories ?

I've pretty much said for months this just can't be done without that "punch" in spider-man continuity. Too much would be affected for this to be viable.

How about they simply forget their marriage without affecting the entire timeline. Others would know their history but you can't blame two people for not staying married if they don't have a history. More plausible than the big memory wipe. It would also give them time to create new memories. I guess they legally need to devoice but how would this be different than the first time MJ/Peter split. Time to bring back Lobster man and Jill Stacy.

[BooCoo]

Well the first time he waited a good 10, 20 years before marrying.

The sad thing is that IIRC the marriage happened because Stan and John Romita (who at the time were doing the newspaper stirp) wanted it to.

So this whole idea that he shouldn't have married is going against the wishes of two his main creators.

Anyway, less seriously, I think Flash would be a good foil, always trying to win Peter away from Namor.

LOL, and drive him into the arms of a happy Gambit. :p

[Ramiel]

Nodody, he should stay a swinging single guy and have casual, no strings attached sex with various love interests as much as he pleases. I mean, with all the crap he's been through as of late, shouldn't his luck change with him getting as 'lucky' as possible.

But seriously, I doubt they'll actually marry him off anytime soon and eventually, one day in the future, I'm sure him and MJ will be back together.

[kello]

Spidey should date that new character...what's her name? Oh yeah, Jackpot! They seem good together

[Ramiel]

Spidey should date that new character...what's her name? Oh yeah, Jackpot! They seem good together

Isn't that just suppose to be Mary Jane?

[Chris Nowlin]

Is the Gwen Stacy clone still running around? If so, her.

Assuming she's finally left that dreary Miles Warren clone

[Jerry W. Loper]

Crooks couldn't try to get at Spidey by kidnapping or hurting Mary Jane "Palmer," - Petey couldn't cheat on "her" either. :D

[Anarchist Orphan]

I say Psylocke. Since I've always liked her and is a great charchter and plus if they have kids maybe in the future they could be an X-Man which would be awesome, imagine the son of Peter Parker in the X-Men?

[Kid Kyoto]

I say Psylocke. Since I've always liked her and is a great charchter and plus if they have kids maybe in the future they could be an X-Man which would be awesome, imagine the son of Peter Parker in the X-Men?

I had an idea a while back that Logan was Peter's real dad. He's also Steve Roger's and frank Castle's dad too. that's they they're all so tough and able to survive things no one else can.

So that would be a good reaon for Peter and Psylocke to get married and have lots of triple jointed sex and eurasian spider ninja psychic babies.

[Flâneur]

Spiderman should marry Black Panther - we know T'Challa is secretly aching for a go with a joystick and all those jokes just hide Peter's secret homosexuality. Spider/Tiger sex ftw.

[Alan2099]

MODOK. He should marry MODOK.

[Len Ikari145]

Mary Jane.

Hey, I go with what works.

[Omega Alpha]

MODOK. He should marry MODOK.

MODOK is not the marrying type. Sure, a night of fun here and there, but that's it.

[Ramiel]

Mary Jane.

Hey, I go with what works.

Wouldn't be surprised if that ended up being the case, it may be awhile, but after Joe Q. steps down I could see someone redoing the marriage

[kello]

Isn't that just suppose to be Mary Jane?

Spidey should date that new character...what's her name? Oh yeah, Jackpot! They seem good together

It was supposed to be a joke, but I don't think it went over well....:(

[Ramiel]

It was supposed to be a joke, but I don't think it went over well....:(

Well, I thought it was a joke at first, but I wasn't 100% sure if I was right about who Jackpot was

[Toku King]

Tony Stark. Hey, there's something there.

[spiderman_rj]

i seriouly vote for silver sable,even before i read the what if where they really married,i always felt that sable had a soft heart for spider man,plus they both have a tragic past.

i second black cat,the mature one not the one from the simbionte saga,i hate how writers write her as a beeachy just so that mj keeps her shining spot,kinda the same way they treat carnage in suport for venom status,felicia cares for peter,it has been shown a lot,and she has or should had depending on the writer matured in these past years,i would like to see them toguether she would be the perfect replacement.

and of course,ultimate spider man and astonishing x men made me root for kitty!!! never paid attention to her but really, in 616 they would be the perfect match if she had apeared in comics earlier.but now her thing with colossus seems to be getting serious,they even had sex! lets hopes both colossus die in uncanny and mj in one more day saga, so we could have a widowed peter and a grieving kitty consoling each other,i mean peter is a avenger and kitty is/was shield,not so uncomong for them to met.(to the hell the lot of you kitty colussus fans!!!) hehe

[spiderman_rj]

Spider-Women, then they could have crazy spider sex an shit :rolleyes:

i dont know,it hasnt been really explored but jessica and peter seem to have a sister/brother relationship offscreen.but hey its everytime you see a woman who can get you instant boner both visually and chemically,natural viagra!

[Rix]

Both she and Peter are like triple jointed or something. Their wedding night could be covered in 12 part story arc with diagrams and manuals.


Maximum Coitalage!

[Chris Nowlin]

MODOK. He should marry MODOK.

Hey! Spidey's not gay, dammit! (Yes, I've seen the dancing (http://www2.b3ta.com/spidermanwillmakeyougay/))


But MODAM... there's an idea.

[Kid Kyoto]

Hey! Spidey's not gay, dammit! (Yes, I've seen the dancing (http://www2.b3ta.com/spidermanwillmakeyougay/))



Come on, would a straight man go out dressed like this?

http://www.mikecs.net/prodigeek/images/ProdigeekQAwithDanSlottcowriterofAmazing_9B3/spiderman_fcbd_jimenez_01.jpg

[Rahul]

He should marry a tree.


Not only it will grow and bring good luck(atleast that's what people in certian parts of my country believe), but also no one will think of attacking it, cause you know, its a tree.

[Gene M.]

Spiderman should marry Black Panther - we know T'Challa is secretly aching for a go with a joystick and all those jokes just hide Peter's secret homosexuality. Spider/Tiger sex ftw.
It makes me mad that you posted this before I could.

[shaunyc56]

If were going w/ Gay Spidey. It has got to be the supreme team...... ready....
Spiderman and the Human Torch.

C'mon, you've thought it....

[Assassin Spider]

If we're gonna have Spider-Man go gay, I say put him with Daredevil. They understand each other better and they hang out more frequently than Spidey does with Torch.

If we're staying on the straight path, then put Spider-Man with She-Hulk. Written well, they're both somewhat troubled characters who use humor as a way of coping with their issues and they could have a lot of fun together. Besides, you all know it'd be worth it just to see Bruce Banner tell Peter, "You hurt her, Hulk smash."

[Jinxer]

If we're gonna have Spider-Man go gay, I say put him with Daredevil. They understand each other better and they hang out more frequently than Spidey does with Torch.

But Torch is flaming!

If we're staying on the straight path, then put Spider-Man with She-Hulk. Written well, they're both somewhat troubled characters who use humor as a way of coping with their issues and they could have a lot of fun together. Besides, you all know it'd be worth it just to see Bruce Banner tell Peter, "You hurt her, Hulk smash."

I would totally buy into that. In fact, I'd love reading that.

[IRONY...]

why not ? nothing stopped him with Colossus .

no offense guys....


Please just STOP giving Marvel ideas...the last years they are writing comics directly after reading the boards...

[Arilou]

Blasts from the Past:
Felicia Hardy: Not the marrying kind. Though I could see them having an on-off relationship (I imagine Felicia causing some huge trouble/getting the police and half the underworld to blame her and/or Spidey, then running away only to return at the most awkward moment, whirlwind Spidey of his feet and then go do it all AGAIN)

Silver Sablinova: It could work. And their future daughter could be the Silver Spider, which would just be cool.

If we're going magical retcon, why not Jeanne DeWolff while we're at it? Her crush on Spidey was never explored (although her death-story WAS good)

The gay Option:

For some reason I'd imagine Peter with a strong, muscular boyfriend. Like Kraven the Hunter.

It COULD work!

Other ideas:
She-Hulk: They're both fun-loving, relatively deep characters and I think they could work together very well.

Ms. Marvel: Seriously. They could trade "I hate JJJ" stories.

Jessica Jones: Hey, she had a high school crush on him. Stealing her from Luke Cage wouldn't be advisable though....

Sally Floyd: She obviously has issues up the wazoo. Perfect match.

[bluefox]

i want Jean Grey for spidey. This will be interesting....

by the way guys, i visited www.2-clicks-comics.com, a new interesting site for comics, comic book collectors, etc..
go and visit this site. you can find more useful comic stuff there..

[Mississippienne]

If we're gonna have Spider-Man go gay, I say put him with Daredevil. They understand each other better and they hang out more frequently than Spidey does with Torch.

This is true! No one that Catholic is entirely heterosexual. But DD's got his own wife who needs to be retconned out of existence before he and Spidey can tie the knot. Also, I get the impression Iron Fist already put the Gay Dibs on Daredevil.

For some reason I'd imagine Peter with a strong, muscular boyfriend. Like Kraven the Hunter.

Make it Alyosha (Kraven Jr.) and you've got a deal!

[Nitmo]

Whatever happened to Betty Brant?