Good Guys vs. Bad Boys

[Shisho]

I was having this discussion with a friend of mine today about some of our fictional character "crushes." I mentioned Seth Bullock (Timothy Olyphant for those who have seen the new Die Hard recently) from Deadwood, which lead to a discussion of the new Preacher series coming out on HBO, and my mad crush on the character of Jesse Custer. My friend pointed out a trend in the other characters I listed, which only reaffirmed what I had always suspected. That is, I really dig Boy Scout types, good guys, and stand-up fellas. There's this stereotype that girls only find the "bad boy" type sexy, which I've always thought was crap. Am I alone in this?

So the fun question of the day is this (and it goes out to the guys and gals out there): Which do you prefer?

[Aggie]

ooooh...tasty...personally i'm not, about either...i kinda have a soft spot for the guys that war somewhere in between...which would probably explain why i loved villains united/secret six so much...i love the shades of grey...but if i had to choose between just the 2...i think that bad boys have a flair about them...and that aspect of danger is pretty exciting which is always the case when you want something you just know you're not suppose to want...and inevitably dealing w/ the consequences of that desire.

[Sarah Beach]

I go for what I call the "outlaw hero" - someone who has been set outside society, but sticks around fighting for good. Odysseus, Robin Hood, Zorro, the Shadow, Batman -- ya see a pattern here? ;)

[Shisho]

ooooh...tasty...personally i'm not, about either...i kinda have a soft spot for the guys that war somewhere in between...which would probably explain why i loved villains united/secret six so much...i love the shades of grey...but if i had to choose between just the 2...i think that bad boys have a flair about them...and that aspect of danger is pretty exciting which is always the case when you want something you just know you're not suppose to want...and inevitably dealing w/ the consequences of that desire.

You going for the bad boys huh? There's a surprise. :D

I go for what I call the "outlaw hero" - someone who has been set outside society, but sticks around fighting for good. Odysseus, Robin Hood, Zorro, the Shadow, Batman -- ya see a pattern here? ;)

Captain Malcom Reynolds? *swoon*

[Lester C.]

And this is why men have to lie about themselves in order to get laid.

[Shisho]

And this is why men have to lie about themselves in order to get laid.

Don't be hatin' spoilsport. And answer the question. (it was open to guys too, remember?) :rolleyes:

[Aggie]

Don't be hatin' spoilsport. And answer the question. (it was open to guys too, remember?) :rolleyes:

don't confuse the poor boy...

[Shisho]

don't confuse the poor boy...

But it's so easy. ;)

[heystacy]

I like the spirited heroine who has some edge to her. I suppose the shades of gray falls on me too.

[stealthwise]

Wait, Jesse Custer and Bullock are "good guys"? I think that at best they're anti-heroes, along with Malcolm Reynolds, and there's nothing wrong with that, but they're a lot closer to "Bad Boys" than "good guys" in many ways.

[Lester C.]

Don't be hatin' spoilsport. And answer the question. (it was open to guys too, remember?) :rolleyes:

Hating. No I was telling the truth. You show me a man who doesn't lie in a bar and I will show you someone who is going home alone.

[Aggie]

But it's so easy. ;)

it's like i made you in my own image...

[Aggie]

Hating. No I was telling the truth. You show me a man who doesn't lie in a bar and I will show you someone who is going home alone.

show me a woman drunk in a a bar and i'll show you someone who doesn't care what she leaves w/...;)

[Night Swordsman]

show me a woman drunk in a a bar and i'll show you someone who doesn't care what she leaves w/...;)


So,how many shots can i buy you? :p

[Aggie]

So,how many shots can i buy you? :p

i never have more than 2 drinks when i'm out...better luck next time pally...:p

[Night Swordsman]

i never have more than 2 drinks when i'm out...better luck next time pally...:p

Aww. I would so be your DD for the evening. :)

<noogies Aggie>

[Aggie]

Aww. I would so be your DD for the evening. :)

<noogies Aggie>

that would be a given since i can't drive...in case you haven't guessed yet...i'm a control freak...so i tend not to drink to the point where my ability to think is impaired in any way.

[Night Swordsman]

that would be a given since i can't drive...in case you haven't guessed yet...i'm a control freak...so i tend not to drink to the point where my ability to think is impaired in any way.

You? Controlling? Nooo! Heaven forbid THAT thought ever went into my head! :D

And Aggie...you know me better than that. You would get home safe and sound either way.

[Larime]

Stan Nail: Good guy or bad boy? :)

[Solaris]

I prefer a guy who likes to have fun "roleplaying" a bad guy a bit---you know, dressing up in leathers, being a bit of a smartass, doing bar tricks or whatever... but I want a good guy inside.

I've dated some bad guys, and they're not worth hanging around.

One was a black-haired, blue-eyed wildchild, who'd apparently been mixed up with some pretty wild stuff in his past, good-looking as all get-out, etc... and he jerked me around something fierce, stood me up for multiple dates to hang out with his friends... but the killer for me was when he was supposed to go to the movies with me and my kids, and he stood us up.

You DON'T lie to my kids, and stand them up. Ever.

I was ready to beat the crap out of him... but I got better revenge: he had this thing about not wanting his mom (who he lived with) to know what a jerk he was... so when I officially broke up with him, I went to her house and told her why---that he'd stood up my kids.

:D

You DON'T mess with my kids. Period.

And ohhhh, hell, were his feathers ruffled over THAT one! :evilsmile

EDIT: and before you wonder about "bad," well, two of the guys I dated were former drug dealers: one white, and one hispanic. Both were rehabilitated (one for his kids, after he'd done some jail time; one because he nearly got caught and got the shit scared out of him). And I'm not talking the corner pot dimebag guys---I'm talking coke dealers, etc. Yeah, at times I could really pick 'em. *sigh* But at least I *learned* from my mistakes (and hey, who goes into a relationship telling their new gf "Hey: I used to be a drug dealer!"), and ended up with the best kind of guy of all (who certainly is NOT, and never WAS, any kind of drug dealer).

[KevinTBrown]

I prefer a guy who likes to have fun "roleplaying" a bad guy a bit---you know, dressing up in leathers, being a bit of a smartass, doing bar tricks or whatever... but I want a good guy inside.

Hello there.

I'm Kevin.

Nice to meet you.

Wanna come over and look at my etchings.... and whips & floggers?


;)

[Tommy]

How exactly do you define a good guy and a bad boy?

I would say I have dated exclusivly from the good guy camp. And all of them were total assholes.

I do know I am really attracted to the Bad Boys.

[TCJohnson]

EDIT: and before you wonder about "bad," well, two of the guys I dated were former drug dealers: one white, and one hispanic. Both were rehabilitated (one for his kids, after he'd done some jail time; one because he nearly got caught and got the shit scared out of him). And I'm not talking the corner pot dimebag guys---I'm talking coke dealers, etc. Yeah, at times I could really pick 'em. *sigh* But at least I *learned* from my mistakes (and hey, who goes into a relationship telling their new gf "Hey: I used to be a drug dealer!"), and ended up with the best kind of guy of all (who certainly is NOT, and never WAS, any kind of drug dealer).

I used to peddle caffiene.

That's right, babe, bad to the bloodvessels!

[Magneto_X]

I've always liked the Good Girl types.

In real life and fictional characters.

The Bad Girls do have their allure, of course, but they're not worth the hassle and/or the beating/death from the hero or some other associate she's pissed off.

[Night Swordsman]

I am a nice guy who has tried to be at one time in my younger days a bad boy until i realized that was not me,and went back to being a nice guy.

Girls DO like bad boys...but those same boys usually end up hurting the girl in the end. I would never,ever be that. If that makes me old fashioned,quaint,or just down right boring,i rather be that than a lie.

[Infra-Man]

I go for what I call the "outlaw hero" - someone who has been set outside society, but sticks around fighting for good. Odysseus, Robin Hood, Zorro, the Shadow, Batman -- ya see a pattern here? ;)

I used to dress up like Batman all through college and that never helped me get any dates...

...oh you mean figuratively, not literally. All these years wasted. Curses!

[Solaris]

Hello there.

I'm Kevin.

Nice to meet you.

Wanna come over and look at my etchings.... and whips & floggers?


;)


Let my husband take pictures, and I'll be glad to tour your etchings, whips, and floggers collection.

:D

[Solaris]

How exactly do you define a good guy and a bad boy?

I would say I have dated exclusivly from the good guy camp. And all of them were total assholes.

I do know I am really attracted to the Bad Boys.


Well, there's the stereotypes of "good guy/bad guy": good guys being the whitebread Richie Cunningham type, and bad guys being anything from the Fonz on down to Hell's Angels. :D

Then there's the realistic viewpoint:

Bad guys live for trouble, for the thrill... and are committed only to themselves. Good guys are capable of a mutually-nourishing relationship with someone they love.

Girls like the thrill of the bad guy stereotype... because it implies both power, and rebellion to authority... and it's exciting. They tend to *fall* for bad guys because they're dumb enough to think "I can rescue him---I can turn him into a good guy." Which the truly bad guys play for all it's worth, until the woman wises up, or the guy tires of her.

A truly good guy respects his partner as an individual and an equal. He's honest, and has integrity. He wants something real in his life.

Now, some good guys are rather... well, boring, yes---mainly because they were raised to live within social limits, and are often afraid to question those limits. Other good guys have learned to question such, and have figured out which ones actually have to do with being a good person, and which ones are merely social conventions and expectations.

The really *fun* ones are the ones who will be "bad" in the sense of "hey, let's make love under the stadium seating during the game"... but who would never abandon their love, or their honesty. In other words, they've learned to disregard some of the social conventions in order to have fun *together*... but on the truly important issues are true gold.

That's my take on it.

[Solaris]

I used to peddle caffiene.

That's right, babe, bad to the bloodvessels!

Troy says I ought to have a coffee IV every morning... glad I didn't meet you when I was dating!

:D

[Tommy]

Bad guys live for trouble, for the thrill... and are committed only to themselves. Good guys are capable of a mutually-nourishing relationship with someone they love.

In that case... I have only dated bad guys since there were all only committed to themselves. But none of them were trouble makers, rabble rousers, powerful or against authority.

Hence why I think of them as good guys.

[KevinTBrown]

Let my husband take pictures, and I'll be glad to tour your etchings, whips, and floggers collection.

:D

As long as he steers clear of the backlash of the whip.... ;)

[Eliseu Gouveia]

I like nice girls.
Sweet ones with a good heart and a sense of humour.

Imagination too is a must, I can´t stand grey people.
My background´s in engineering, so I can safely say that I´ve lived most of my adult life surrounded by grey, pragmatic down-to-earth zombies.
Gah!
- Vade retro, Satanás!

[Major Comma]

my parents were married for almost 61 years so i guess i am looking for a girl just like mom
i dont know if that makes her a good girl or bad girl per se i hate labels
she has to have a good sense of humor though

[Charles RB]

So the fun question of the day is this (and it goes out to the guys and gals out there): Which do you prefer?

Good girls who roleplay as bad girls with black leather and weaponry as standard.

I shall avoid thinking about what this says about my mind, but said mind is probably like that bit in Doctor Who: Gridlock where he finds out hidden under the surface is wall-to-wall ravenous Macra (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:2007Macra.jpg).

[Alan Lynch]

I'm probably a good girls fan, though it depends what you're looking for at the time. I've nothing against bad girl types, so long as there's something there other than...well, the badness.

And in my experience? Girls totally prefer the bad guys. Either that or I bear a greater resemblance to a troll than I thought.

[Infra-Man]

In all seriousness, I guess I tend to like good girls with lots of character and a good sense of humor.

I used to date this girl who was really into screwball comedies and she tended to act like the female leads in those movies, which was great--she talked really fast yet precisely and had loads of moxie.

So I guess what I'm saying is I want to go back in time and date Rosalind Russell or Katherine Hepburn in their prime.

[Monkey Boy]

I just like girls. Good or bad. I don't seem to follow a pattern. Although I do like the they-could-kill-me-in-my-sleep feeling some bad girls give me.

[Francis]

I'm quite simple. I prefer integrity, playfulness, and intelligence. This can lead to either side of the spectrum officially - but is effectively a preference for good (although not insipid).

[Shisho]

Wait, Jesse Custer and Bullock are "good guys"? I think that at best they're anti-heroes, along with Malcolm Reynolds, and there's nothing wrong with that, but they're a lot closer to "Bad Boys" than "good guys" in many ways.

You know, I knew someone was going to bring this up. I guess it depends on your definition of "good guy" and "bad boy." Seth Bullock always tried to do the right thing in spite of living in a morally bankrupt town. I think part of the point behind Deadwood is a contrast to modern times, and how what is considered "good" and "moral" is sometimes a matter of setting and perspective when you're trying to protect yourself and your family. If you go back and watch the seasons, even when he screws up, he tries to make it right in the end for no other reason than it's the right thing to do. The problem with Bullock is his wicked temper. It's his fatal flaw. But even in the first episode when he hangs the man in front of the prison, he does it because he knows a) the guy is guilty, he even confesses to it, and b) he can't win against that lynch mob and knows that whatever they'll do to the poor bastard will be much worse than a quick death. It was a mercy killing, in a sense. With Jesse Custer, it's the same thing. Tries to do the right thing it screwed up situations, despite all the crap that gets thrown his way.

Now, I'll agree that in a literary sense, they are both Byronic heroes or even anti-heroes. But I believe they're both good guys. Alex from a Clockwork Orange is also considered an anti-hero by modern standards, and he's most definately not a good guy. He's a real prick. If you go strictly by "hero" in the comic book sense (like Superman), you get into unrealistic ideals that tend to be a little boring. (I'll have a lot of Superman fans disagree with me on this, but I can go into a long soapbox rant on the reasons why I'm not fond of the character and how I'm not even sure he's as "heroic" as everyone seems to think, but I'll save it.) Even heroes in the classic sense (like Hercules) can be considered anti-heroes, and whether or not they are good guys have a lot to do with the times and the setting.

So all of this babbling is really just to make a point, which is, "good guy" and "bad boy" is up to interpretation for purposes of this post. :)

[Shisho]

Stan Nail: Good guy or bad boy? :)

I'd say "bad boy" with occasional lapses in judgement, causing him to accidentally do good things. ;) :)

[Cam63]

I understand how the " bad boy " thing can be exciting to some sheilas, but I'm bewildered why falling for someone who's basically an arsehole who'll treat them like shit is a better option to anything else.

[Solaris]

I understand how the " bad boy " thing can be exciting to some sheilas, but I'm bewildered why falling for someone who's basically an arsehole who'll treat them like shit is a better option to anything else.

So am I, Cam... so am I.

[Charles RB]

Remember Kramer's Laws: most people are stupid.

[Solaris]

I'm having fun with my hubby... I left him a voice mail (he's on a plane home) saying that I've got something big and long and quite firm, here for him as a surprise...

...what I'll show him when he gets home is that our zucchini plant has made its first zucchini---about 10 inches long. Wow. I also harvested our first tomato today, from our garden.

:D

All kidding aside, gardening is so much fun---especially when the plants flower, or in the case of veggies, they produce fruit. :)

[Night Swordsman]

I'm having fun with my hubby... I left him a voice mail (he's on a plane home) saying that I've got something big and long and quite firm, here for him as a surprise...

...what I'll show him when he gets home is that our zucchini plant has made its first zucchini---about 10 inches long. Wow. I also harvested our first tomato today, from our garden.

:D

All kidding aside, gardening is so much fun---especially when the plants flower, or in the case of veggies, they produce fruit. :)

My carrots and sweet corn just came in as well,Solaris. Nothing like fresh sweet corn on the cob,and i am addicted to carrots.

Mmmm.

[Cam63]

Bloody rabbit.

[Shisho]

I understand how the " bad boy " thing can be exciting to some sheilas, but I'm bewildered why falling for someone who's basically an arsehole who'll treat them like shit is a better option to anything else.

I don't get it either, darlin'. I look at some of the guys my friends are into, and I'm like "really? Huh."

[Night Swordsman]

Bloody rabbit.

Trix are for kids. And Aggie. ;) (That is going to get me hurt!).

[Night Swordsman]

I don't get it either, darlin'. I look at some of the guys my friends are into, and I'm like "really? Huh."

Same here Shisho. I know of two very wonderful,smart,and kind hearted women who are married to like the absolute opposite,in every way. One even calls his wife AT work constantly to keep tabs on her and her whereabouts.

There ARE nice guys out there folks. Seriously.

[Solaris]

Same here Shisho. I know of two very wonderful,smart,and kind hearted women who are married to like the absolute opposite,in every way. One even calls his wife AT work constantly to keep tabs on her and her whereabouts.

There ARE nice guys out there folks. Seriously.

That's what I keep telling the ladies!!! There are some great guys out there... but you've gotta be ready for them, and be pretty balanced yourself, in order to recognize them and snatch them up before someone else does.

Honestly, I think that's part of the problem: there are so many women, still, who are raised with the idea that it's "romantic to redeem the fallen swain." Not to mention, so many women who are raised to think that they only deserve what they get, whatever the fuck that is.

A true observation I've made:

Happy, confident people tend to attract lots of folks... but especially other happy, confident people. Needy, low-self esteem people tend to attract either users, or those who will constantly feed their need for reinforcement.

So... often women end up with either abusers, or guys that they must constantly prop up.

I keep telling them, "get happy in yourself FIRST! Be happy in who and what you are, whether or not you ever get a partner. IF there's someone out there for you, you're much more likely to be "together" enough yourself to deal with them on an equal basis... and you're much more likely to catch their attention in the first place.

Now don't think I'm being superior with this---I've been battling self-image issues for YEARS. This is the kind of thing I tell MYSELF, when I start getting down on "me"... because I was raised in that "please your man, and sacrifice for him" kind of home, and I'm still trying to counter those ingrained messages.

On a lighter note, there really *are* lots of nice guys out there. I've met several, and married one. :)

[Solaris]

My carrots and sweet corn just came in as well,Solaris. Nothing like fresh sweet corn on the cob,and i am addicted to carrots.

Mmmm.

Well, we have a small raised garden bed---not big enough for corn, and honestly, I'd rather just buy the baby pre-washed carrots in the store... but fresh tomatoes? Oh my!

We're also growing a lot of fresh herbs this year---our first year at gardening. And of course, I've now got lots of flowers and bushes and flowering trees in the yard and on the deck.

[Night Swordsman]

Well, we have a small raised garden bed---not big enough for corn, and honestly, I'd rather just buy the baby pre-washed carrots in the store... but fresh tomatoes? Oh my!

We're also growing a lot of fresh herbs this year---our first year at gardening. And of course, I've now got lots of flowers and bushes and flowering trees in the yard and on the deck.

I have never tried to raise herbs before. I also not a fan of tomatoes(except for pasta sauce. I know,i am weird). And baby pre-washed carrots are my snack food. Along with wheat-thins.

And the occasional skittles.

Also,fresh green beans are yummy. And snow peas.

[cedardryad]

I go for what I call the "outlaw hero" - someone who has been set outside society, but sticks around fighting for good. Odysseus, Robin Hood, Zorro, the Shadow, Batman -- ya see a pattern here? ;)

Ditto. Always had a soft spot for Bats. Never liked the bad boys though, they have bad habits. :D I can relate to them, but that is it. Ironically enough almost all of my favorite female comic characters are villainesses.

Maybe not bad guy, but bad ass, snarky, foul tongued and sarcastic. Like me.

[Solaris]

I have never tried to raise herbs before. I also not a fan of tomatoes(except for pasta sauce. I know,i am weird). And baby pre-washed carrots are my snack food. Along with wheat-thins.

And the occasional skittles.

Also,fresh green beans are yummy. And snow peas.



Gods I love thread drift!!! :D ;)

Well, this is my first time of trying to garden on my own EVER (I used to help my parents with their garden years ago... but I never had the yard space to do it myself, before. I'm basically an "experimental" gardener, seeing as how I know a few things, but have planted like crazy and am having fun seeing what works and what doesn't.

Anyway, I decided the one thing that supermarkets don't have much of, that's easy to grow, is fresh herbs... so I planted rosemary (one of my favorite cooking and general herbs), sweet marjoram, thyme, 3 kinds of basil, oregano, lemon balm, german chamomile, and a couple of others I can't remember off the top of my head.

Main veggies I'm growing are tomatoes (several varietals), the one giginormous zucchini plant, a couple of banana peppers (for hubby), and some other peppers, including jalapenos, and some green onions.

Next year I may branch out (haha) a bit more... but I've also been very busy planting trees and flowers and bushes, here at the new house. I've got two weeping japanese cherry trees, one regular japanese cherry, a white dogwood, a red dogwood, a cypress, about 5 gardenias, 4 rose bushes and 2 miniature roses, and umpteen flower plants.

And I'm having the time of my life... especially when they take off and grow, and bloom.

It's weird, being halfway through my life and never getting an indoor plant to survive, to suddenly find that I'm doing pretty darned well with the ourdoor gardening... and I love it. :D


PS---I'm not fond of canned green beans, unless they're rinsed several times (I prefer the french cut)... but fresh? Absolutely! I love the baby ones, when they're sauteed with butter and garlic... yum. And snow peas rock.

[Night Swordsman]

Gods I love thread drift!!! :D ;)

Well, this is my first time of trying to garden on my own EVER (I used to help my parents with their garden years ago... but I never had the yard space to do it myself, before. I'm basically an "experimental" gardener, seeing as how I know a few things, but have planted like crazy and am having fun seeing what works and what doesn't.

Anyway, I decided the one thing that supermarkets don't have much of, that's easy to grow, is fresh herbs... so I planted rosemary (one of my favorite cooking and general herbs), sweet marjoram, thyme, 3 kinds of basil, oregano, lemon balm, german chamomile, and a couple of others I can't remember off the top of my head.

Main veggies I'm growing are tomatoes (several varietals), the one giginormous zucchini plant, a couple of banana peppers (for hubby), and some other peppers, including jalapenos, and some green onions.

Next year I may branch out (haha) a bit more... but I've also been very busy planting trees and flowers and bushes, here at the new house. I've got two weeping japanese cherry trees, one regular japanese cherry, a white dogwood, a red dogwood, a cypress, about 5 gardenias, 4 rose bushes and 2 miniature roses, and umpteen flower plants.

And I'm having the time of my life... especially when they take off and grow, and bloom.

It's weird, being halfway through my life and never getting an indoor plant to survive, to suddenly find that I'm doing pretty darned well with the ourdoor gardening... and I love it. :D


PS---I'm not fond of canned green beans, unless they're rinsed several times (I prefer the french cut)... but fresh? Absolutely! I love the baby ones, when they're sauteed with butter and garlic... yum. And snow peas rock.

Yes they do! I add the peas with white rice and a wonderful pasta sauce my mother taught me years ago(minus garlic,due to allergies...begin the vampire jokes now...:rolleyes: ). Is really yummy.

Not much on flowers/decorative plants. I have ferns, (I have found bathrooms make great places to hang them,due to steam from showers) and a cactus,but other than that,not much. But i WILL admit my love of Bonsai trees and Cherry Blossums trees. They really look beautiful.

Zucchini is REAL easy to grow,yet hard to give away. Grows easily,but i am not the biggest fan of it. Fortantely i have a recipie from my late grandmother which is to die for. Must hunt it up for next year.

Peppers are a no-no for me,sadly. Even when i was at perfect health,peppers never agreed with me.

The fresh herbs is interesting to me. I just usually buy store bought herbs. Will have to look into it further. Nice thing is i have alot of time on my hands,San Diego Comic-Con notwithstanding...

[cedardryad]

Stan Nail: Good guy or bad boy? :)

Man after my heart. :D

[Major Comma]

where does indiana jones fit in the good guys /bad boy paradigm?
heroic? yes but if we are to believe raiders he pretty much broke marion ravenwoods heart
just curious

[Alan Lynch]

Indy's a good guy. He just makes mistakes.

Also, I hate raw carrots. Love them cooked though, in just about any way you can do them. I find that quite odd.

[Aggie]

Trix are for kids. And Aggie. ;) (That is going to get me hurt!).

to do list:




buy dog food
volunteer at nursing home
save sinners
watch the price is
bitch slap night kitty
have dinner



ah there's just no rest for the weary...*sigh*

[Shisho]

to do list:




buy dog food
volunteer at nursing home
save sinners
watch the price is
bitch slap night kitty
have dinner



ah there's just no rest for the weary...*sigh*

The Empress Dictator Supreme of Aggietown...volunteers? Don't you have evil minions to do that for you? ;)