Moments of bizarreness at work

[thespianphryne]

Everyone has bizarre moments at work. But this is the most amusing phone call I've had at work in a few months.

There I am, hanging around when the phone rings:

::trrrrrrrr trrrrrrrr:: ::trrrrrrrr trrrrrrrr::

Me: Hello…
The Guy: ..You acting?
Me: Excuse me?
The Guy: You guys do acting?
Me: Yes, we’re an acting company. How can I help you?
The Guy: Like movies an’ stuff?
Me: No, we’re not involved with film at all, we’re a theatre company
The Guy: So…like…you ever been in a porn film?
Me: I beg your pardon, that’s a slightly inappropriate question to ask me…
The Guy: Naa it ain’t. You…How old are you… you old enough to be having sex? If you’re old old enough to have sex, you’re old enough to be in erotic film.
Me: I understand that, sir but I don’t think I can …
The Guy: Naw, naw see…’Cuz I want to be in porno and I wan’ to know how to…wha’s the best way to break into the adult film industry.
Me: I’m afraid I won’t be able to help you. We’re in theatre, and I really don’t know anybody in the adult film industry.
The Guy: See ‘cuz I got nine and a half inches here and I’d like to see it on film, y’know?
Me: Well, you know what…Why don’t you go to local video store where you get your porn…
The Guy: Like can they…
Me: No, please let me finish. Or, if you have a collection at home, look on the back of the video for the name of the production company. Then look up the name of the company on the internet and find their address and number. Some of these companies are even listed, you can call 411 and get their number. Someone who answers your call on that end will be able to help you better. Okay?
The Guy: Okay…a’right,yeah. Thanks you.
Me: You’re welcome.
The Guy: Y’ have a good day now.
Me: I will; thanks.


What amusing moments have overtaken you at your workplace?

[Crowley]

it's just BUSINESS as usual at DDP:
http://i63.photobucket.com/albums/h130/qeelocke/DSCF0348.jpg

[Cam63]

Everyone has bizarre moments at work. But this is the most amusing phone call I've had at work in a few months.

There I am, hanging around when the phone rings:

::trrrrrrrr trrrrrrrr:: ::trrrrrrrr trrrrrrrr::

Me: Hello…
The Guy: ..You acting?
Me: Excuse me?
The Guy: You guys do acting?
Me: Yes, we’re an acting company. How can I help you?
The Guy: Like movies an’ stuff?
Me: No, we’re not involved with film at all, we’re a theatre company
The Guy: So…like…you ever been in a porn film?
Me: I beg your pardon, that’s a slightly inappropriate question to ask me…
The Guy: Naa it ain’t. You…How old are you… you old enough to be having sex? If you’re old old enough to have sex, you’re old enough to be in erotic film.
Me: I understand that, sir but I don’t think I can …
The Guy: Naw, naw see…’Cuz I want to be in porno and I wan’ to know how to…wha’s the best way to break into the adult film industry...

Good thing for him he only needs one hand to hold a phone.

[blackcanary_416]

I work at Blockbuster but I haven't had anything like that happen. I can't believe what some people will do. Some of the stuff that I get phone calls about I couldn't even imagine be doing.

That picture is great EmperorCrowley, I want to do something like that for the newspaper staff.

[Cam63]

I work with some insane people.

[TheTen-EyedMan]

I worked in a video store in my formative employment years and the amount of times I was asked for kiddie porn, legitimately was off the charts.

Lovely bunch of people in Downtown Tulsa.

[ChthonicSpirit]

I worked in a video store in my formative employment years and the amount of times I was asked for kiddie porn, legitimately was off the charts.


Christ Almighty.

I guess the police should patrol video stores instead of the internet, if they wanted to catch those people.

[heystacy]

It's finals time, and people are comming in on the last 30 mins of night asking for detailed help for research. Keep in mind some of them have NEVER set foot in the building, but need everything, like now.

A few poor souls went to the reference area trying to check those books out.

[Tobias March]

We get emails at work whenever someone in the organisation dies, or a relative.

Every frigging day.

It gets depressing very quickly.

So as part of my job I've been taking calls from retired staff and they keep asking us to issue obituaries. Christ there's enough death floating around, I don't want to become completely morbid.

[Cam63]

I worked in a video store in my formative employment years and the amount of times I was asked for kiddie porn, legitimately was off the charts.

Lovely bunch of people in Downtown Tulsa.

Fuck.

That is more than a bit of a worry.

[Cam63]

Twenty years ago at work, another nurse said AIDS was OK because God was taking care of the " perverts and evil doers. "

Yeah, she's an air breather.

[Jeff Brady]

I worked in a video store in my formative employment years and the amount of times I was asked for kiddie porn, legitimately was off the charts.

Lovely bunch of people in Downtown Tulsa.

Ran into curefreak a few times?

[Cam63]

Curefreak ?

Really ?

[Jeff Brady]

Curefreak ?

Really ?

He does live in Tulsa. Although, most likely not into kiddie porn.

[Cam63]

That's a relief.

[Lester C.]

I'm a third shift security guard because I have to pay for my own education.:mad: Anyway five years ago now when I was working from a different company I was doing my rounds and caught one of the male employees um pleasuring himself in his office.:eek: Um no I didn't, I just made that up. I have nothing to add to this thread that's interesting as the buildings I work at are always empty save for me. Have SK 716 tell you the robbery story if you want something dramatic and exciting.

[Lester C.]

Removed.Nothing to see here people.

[thespianphryne]

. . .Have SK 716 tell you the robbery story if you want something dramatic and exciting.

Yes, sk716, do please tell us. Or me, rather, since there hasn't exactly been a clamour.

[Steel Spider]

I worked in a video store in my formative employment years and the amount of times I was asked for kiddie porn, legitimately was off the charts.

Lovely bunch of people in Downtown Tulsa.

There's a simple solution to that problem. Whenever someone came into the store looking for kiddie porn, you should have pulled out a gun and shot them between the eyes.

[hellokittykat]

I work in the medical field.
Every work day is like a trip to the Twilight Zone.

[hellokittykat]

I worked in a video store in my formative employment years and the amount of times I was asked for kiddie porn, legitimately was off the charts.

Lovely bunch of people in Downtown Tulsa.

Holy crap!

You should say 'Why yes it's right this way. Please follow me to this dark room back here.'
And then beat the shit out of them.

[Azrael52]

What about Kitty Po. . . no, I can't ask that.

[Spike-X]

I worked in a video store in my formative employment years and the amount of times I was asked for kiddie porn, legitimately was off the charts.

Lovely bunch of people in Downtown Tulsa.
"It's all out at the moment, but if you leave your name, address, and phone number, I'll let you know as soon as it comes in."

Hell, if they're dumb enough to come right out and ask for it, they're probably dumb enough to leave their information so you can forward it to the police.

[DungeonmasterJim]

After working numerous years at Toys R Us when I was younger I was able to gather some bizarre stories including some of the following:

Had a female customer flirt with me including extremely detailed graphic sex acts.

Parents asking me to check for the hot Christmas toys on our supply trucks which was then followed with a bribe.

Watched parents including some with infants in carriages run through the store at opening to get 'the hot new toy' advertised.

Some guy in his car getting head from his girlfriend next to our big ticket item pick up door.

Giving job interviews for hiring the Christmas seasonal help on Halloween while dressed up in full Frankenstein make-up and costume.

The yearly initiation of girls from a local private school dressed in insane clown like fashion singing the 'I'm A Toys R Us Kid' school until asked to leave the store.

Some entertainer type guy balancing furniture on his chin or forehead until lasked to leave.


DM Jim

[Cam63]

"It's all out at the moment, but if you leave your name, address, and phone number, I'll let you know as soon as it comes in."

Hell, if they're dumb enough to come right out and ask for it, they're probably dumb enough to leave their information so you can forward it to the police.

...and hopefully your security camera gives a really clear picture too.

[Cam63]

After working numerous years at Toys R Us when I was younger I was able to gather some bizarre stories including some of the following:

Had a female customer flirt with me including extremely detailed graphic sex acts.

Seeing how you work in a toy store, she thought you'd be open to the idea of playing around.

[Lester C.]

Okay this is a true story. There was a young man visiting from some country in Africa that worked at my old Security company. This man ran up a TEN THOUSAND dollar phone bill as he spent every second at the clients accounts having phone sex. He literary spent a forty hour work week having phone sex. Well by the time the phone bill came in, he was back in Africa and the small security company I worked for first tried to fight paying the bill and then were forced to declare bankruptcy by which time I being the rat I am had long fled the sinking ship.

[Red Berens]

Twenty years ago at work, another nurse said AIDS was OK because God was taking care of the " perverts and evil doers. "

Yeah, she's an air breather.

Are you a nurse?

[Lester C.]

Are you a nurse?
Yes, he is. The man takes care of the elderly people that saved the world, built our global infrastructure, and have been more or less forgotten about as their reward for being the greatest generation is to die alone and be cast aside by those they entrusted the world to. It's a disgrace the way society treats the elderly.

[sk716]

Yes, sk716, do please tell us. Or me, rather, since there hasn't exactly been a clamour.

I really don't think being robbed at gunpoint qualifies as a moment of bizarreness.

These days, I work at Walmart, I stare bizarre in the eye every day.

[Cam63]

Yes, he is. The man takes care of the elderly people that saved the world, built our global infrastructure, and have been more or less forgotten about as their reward for being the greatest generation is to die alone and be cast aside by those they entrusted the world to. It's a disgrace the way society treats the elderly.

Yeah, but some are bastards.

[Red Berens]

I think that's pretty cool ( the nurse part, not the whole being mean to the elderly part) and that you're in security work. I think between the three of us, we have the most thankless jobs in the world. Now we just need a teacher to join our little group and we'd have all the thankless jobs covered.

The most bizarre types of calls at my work are when parents ask us to make their kids clean their rooms and behave. The first time this happened, I thought the mother was joking, but she really did want me to go lecture her 12 year old son and make him clean his room.

I went to his room, and I noticed he had a new video game. We ended up playing video games for about 30 minutes - all the while the mother was downstairs thinking I was supervising the clean up.

[Cam63]

The most bizarre types of calls at my work are when parents ask us to make their kids clean their rooms and behave. The first time this happened, I thought the mother was joking, but she really did want me to go lecture her 12 year old son and make him clean his room.

I went to his room, and I noticed he had a new video game. We ended up playing video games for about 30 minutes - all the while the mother was downstairs thinking I was supervising the clean up.

Kids can't help the parents they were dealt.

[Kahnno6]

I really don't think being robbed at gunpoint qualifies as a moment of bizarreness.

These days, I work at Walmart, I stare bizarre in the eye every day.


I worked at Wal-mart the entire time I was in college and shorly thereafter. I have honestly lost count of how many times "bizarre" things happened to me.

Like the guy who came into electronics and asked me where the Coke's were. I started to direct him to the food department and he proceeded to argue with me for at least 30 minutes, stating that he SAW the Coke guy bring them into electronics.

Or the guy who came in and asked where we kept our "flicks".

Or the woman who actually got away with returning her vcr at the customer service desk, only when it got back to electronics it only had a very large brick in the box.

Or the guy who would routinely come in and urinate somewhere in the store...

Or the guy who would come in at least once a week and want me to read the listing of songs on the back of cds.

Or the woman who I had never met before in my life who kept hiking up her skirt and winking at me everytime her husband turned away.

Or the drunks who came in CONSTANTLY.

Or the people who didn't adhere to the "no shirt, no shoes" rule.

Like I said..too many to keep track...

[Cam63]

A nurse did find a couple of visitors who were going past " third base " on a resident's bed and one RN and wardsman were fired after being sprung fucking in a pan room.

[sk716]

I worked at Wal-mart the entire time I was in college and shorly thereafter. I have honestly lost count of how many times "bizarre" things happened to me.

Like the guy who came into electronics and asked me where the Coke's were. I started to direct him to the food department and he proceeded to argue with me for at least 30 minutes, stating that he SAW the Coke guy bring them into electronics.

Or the guy who came in and asked where we kept our "flicks".

Or the woman who actually got away with returning her vcr at the customer service desk, only when it got back to electronics it only had a very large brick in the box.

Or the guy who would routinely come in and urinate somewhere in the store...

Or the guy who would come in at least once a week and want me to read the listing of songs on the back of cds.

Or the woman who I had never met before in my life who kept hiking up her skirt and winking at me everytime her husband turned away.

Or the drunks who came in CONSTANTLY.

Or the people who didn't adhere to the "no shirt, no shoes" rule.

Like I said..too many to keep track...

Those are kind of the norm around a Walmart.

Bizarre was the drunk guy at a listening post in Electronics who kept setting and slapping a giant mousetrap while singing along with whatever he was listening to.

We just watched him for like fifteen minutes before we called management to run him off.

As for things found in returns. In one DVD-RW box we discovered chocolates. In a tent box we found bricks wrapped in a tarp. In a computer we disovered a brick under the monitor. And I don't even want to go into the number of times I went to the service desk to check a return and opened a game system, VCR, or DVD player box to see it crawling with roaches.

[heystacy]

I find that the bizzare stuff so repellent I end up trying to foget it. Once, at my old library, a student reported a man exposed himself to her. I tried to get her to call public saftey, but she declined. Furthermore a couple had sex in the bathroom stall. The custodial agent was so shocked she stopped cleaning. Again, I asked if she would like to call public saftey. She declined as well.

We got a lot of perverts. Guys on their hands and knees trying to peek up skirts. Exhibitionist, and vagrants.

One patron yelled at me over the phone and in person to blame me for the loss of her books, only to return to the library again with all eleven of the books she was fined for that was in "her daughter's room" the whole time.

New library I get clueless students and I am pleased for the difference.

[Lester C.]

Wallmart has two types of security guards. There are the invisble planclothes guys that are very good at their jobs and are not seen unless they are apprehending a theif. Then there is contracted guy that is very visable, drives around all day, and doesn't do a damn thing as he or she has no contact with the store whatsoever and is just there for show. For a year I was that guy. It was great. I drove around all day lisiening to books on cassettes.

Anyway I have two bizarre stores. The first one was a cold February and there was a women shoplifter that ran out in her panties. I guess she lost her shirts and sweats escaping from security. I actually saw one of the internal members of security run and tackle her from behind.

The second story was a bad car accident. Now car accidents happen all the time at Walmart and they are small fender benders. This one was two cars driving into each other at something like forty miles an hour. Everyone was okay but they had to use the jaws of life to get one of the dumb asses out.

[heystacy]

Wallmart has two types of security guards. There are the invisble planclothes guys that are very good at their jobs and are not seen unless they are apprehending a theif. Then there is contracted guy that is very visable, drives around all day, and doesn't do a damn thing as he or she has no contact with the store whatsoever and is just there for show. For a year I was that guy. It was great. I drove around all day lisiening to books on cassettes.

Anyway I have two bizarre stores. The first one was a cold February and there was a women shoplifter that ran out in her panties. I guess she lost her shirts and sweats escaping from security. I actually saw one of the internal members of security run and tackle her from behind.

The second story was a bad car accident. Now car accidents happen all the time at Walmart and they are small fender benders. This one was two cars driving into each other at something like forty miles an hour. Everyone was okay but they had to use the jaws of life to get one of the dumb asses out.


That chick was trifflin'.

I heard, back home, a woman hid in a ditch to get away from mall security. She surrenered after a short time as in the middle of winter and hiding in water did not make a good escape plan.

[Lester C.]

That chick was trifflin'.

I heard, back home, a woman hid in a ditch to get away from mall security. She surrenered after a short time as in the middle of winter and hiding in water did not make a good escape plan.
I can't speak for mall security but the internal guys at Wallmart are very good. Every single day I worked someone got a free ride to the police station. Wallmart takes asset protection very seriously, which is why I never understood why the one contracted visible security guard, me, never had anything to do with the store. I would take hour lunches fully confident in the fact that no one would check on me.

[heystacy]

I can't speak for mall security but the internal guys at Wallmart are very good. Every single day I worked someone got a free ride to the police station. Wallmart takes asset protection very seriously, which is why I never understood why the one contracted visible security guard, me, never had anything to do with the store. I would take hour lunches fully confident in the fact that no one would check on me.


Wow. Never think about theft. I'm there to shop and leave.

I do notice something weird, that the local stores insist you to show them a reciept on your way out, even though there is no visible policy that reserves the right to checkn items. That can lead to trouble.

[Lester C.]

Wow. Never think about theft. I'm there to shop and leave.

I do notice something weird, that the local stores insist you to show them a reciept on your way out, even though there is no visible policy that reserves the right to checkn items. That can lead to trouble.
That's illegal. Just because you read a sign doesn't mean that you give your consent as to what the sign says.

[heystacy]

That's illegal. Just because you read a sign doesn't mean that you give your consent as to what the sign says.

Wal-Mart does check people's bags against their reciepts and have made customers wait in line. A friend told me not to wait in line as there is no policy that outlines their justification. They might as well make people fill out questionares while they wait.

[Lester C.]

Wal-Mart does check people's bags against their reciepts and have made customers wait in line. A friend told me not to wait in line as there is no policy that outlines their justification. They might as well make people fill out questionares while they wait.
A lot of stores do, but its illegal unless they see you pocket something in which case they can make a citizens arrest.

[heystacy]

A lot of stores do, but its illegal unless they see you pocket something in which case they can make a citizens arrest.


However, if they arrest you, and are wrong, they are looking at some legal action aginst them.

They have a lot of people thinking they HAVE to show their reciept before they leave. This is why I hate the holiday shopping season.

[Lester C.]

However, if they arrest you, and are wrong, they are looking at some legal action aginst them.

They have a lot of people thinking they HAVE to show their reciept before they leave. This is why I hate the holiday shopping season.
When someone holds against your will illegally its called kidnapping or unlawful restraint if the citizens arrest angle doesn't hold up. If a police officer arrests you without just cause it's called false arrest. in either case it's a huge payday.:)

The reasons why stores get away with crap is because people don't know the law. There are elements needed for each type of contract and the fact that you read a sign does not give them the right to search you because that is nonbinding contract as it doesn't meet all the elements to be considered a binding contract. There is no consent, consideration, etc so its not valid.

Now there are contracts where a sign does bind you, but only if your preform the action the sign states. For instance if you see a sign asking you to return a missing pet for five hundred dollars and you return the pet than you are entitled o five hundred dollars. I think that's called a unilateral contract but it's been six years since I've had contract law.

[heystacy]

When someone holds against your will illegally its called kidnapping or unlawful restraint if the citizens arrest angle doesn't hold up. If a police officer arrests you without just cause it's called false arrest. in either case it's a huge payday.:)

The reasons why stores get away with crap is because people don't know the law. There are elements needed for each type of contract and the fact that you read a sign does not give them the right to search you because that is nonbinding contract as it doesn't meet all the elements to be considered a binding contract. There is no consent, consideration, etc so its not valid.

Now there are contracts where a sign does bind you, but only if your preform the action the sign states. For instance if you see a sign asking you to return a missing pet for five hundred dollars and you return the pet than you are entitled o five hundred dollars. I think that's called a unilateral contract but it's been six years since I've had contract law.


I have a friend who would agree with you 100%. I see the point as well.

[Cam63]

http://ffmedia.ign.com/filmforce/image/punisher-thomasjane_lg.jpg

Lester Carthan: Security Officer.

He'll break your heart when you shop at Walmart.

[Rik Levins]

Years ago I worked in the art department of a publishing company in New Jersey.
After several years as a staff artist, I was promoted to Art Director.

Now, this company was located in an old building in what used to be Camp Kilmer Military Base during WWII, and is now part of the campus of Rutgers University. The men's room didn't have any urinals, just two stalls with toilets. And there were no deadbolts on the doors to those stalls, so you couldn't completely close them.

So on the day of my promotion, I'm in one of the stalls taking a leak, when the Big Man himself, the president and owner of the company, walks into the men's room, sees me through the partially open door, and steps into the stall with me.
"I just heard about your promotion," he says, extending his hand for a shake. "Congratulations."

I was so dumbfounded that the guy would do this, that I reflexively did what you normally do when someone extends their hand--namely, I took it and shook.

And there I was, shaking hands with the president of the company, with my dick hanging out in the breeze.

Luckily I had finished my business a moment before, or he would have gotten a drenching when I turned around.

[TomStillwell]

This happened to me my freshman year in college.

I went to school in Minnesota, the Twin Cities. I was able to live off campus with my brother who also lived in the area for school. To pay for my living expenses my brother got me a job working for a chain of grocery stores as a security guard.

I wasn't a security guard in a uniform. I was undercover looking for shoplifters. I'd pretend to shop, scope out someone jacking something, and then wait until they had gone past the point of no return...the cash register, and make an arrest. Legally it's still shoplifting, even if you're in the store, if you're past cash registers.

Most times I nabbed folks outside though so as not to disturb the other shoppers.

Believe me, this is a pretty common practice. Most chain stores have this type of security. I can spot them a mile away, just as I see people shoplifting all the time. Once you know what to look for, you can't miss it.

Anyways, so I was working at one of the stores that had a huge problem with shoplifters. There's this very large old Russian woman. Hefty. Bobuska. House dress. You get the picture. She had been loitering around the meat section for a long time and my Spidey sense went off.

There's two things shoplifters steal the most: medicine and meat/fish/poultry/pork. Both things are expensive and usually easy to conceal.

This woman, she looks around to make sure the coast is clear, and shoves a whole ham between her legs. Not a canned ham. A giant butchered ham wrapped in plastic. Like 10 pounds of ham.

She starts waddling toward the exit and I'm nearly laughing as I follow her out. I confronted her and asked her to give me the ham. She acts stupid.

"What ham?"

"The one you put under your dress."

"No ham."

Now, I can't search her. I need a female to do that. Usually a cashier can help in these situations. Instead I decided to wait her out. It's a huge, cold ham clamped between her thighs. How long can she hold it, right?

Thirty minutes! I kept her talking for thirty minutes until finally that damn ham hit the ground. She just looked down at it and shrugged.

Later, I'll tell the story of the twelve fingered drunken Mexican tatooed midget I arrested. I can't make this stuff up.

[Merey]

I work in finance, so no interesting stories AT ALL. And I have a few good stories from back in my theatre days, but they mostly involve shows gone awry or drama between castmates/crew...etc...

[Lester C.]

http://ffmedia.ign.com/filmforce/image/punisher-thomasjane_lg.jpg

Lester Carthan: Security Officer.

He'll break your heart when you shop at Walmart.
That's truer than you know. One of the internal security guards dive tackled an elderly lady that was running out of the store and she broke her arm, or was it her leg? I forget which but the plane clothes security guards at Walmart don't fuck around.

[thespianphryne]

I work in finance, so no interesting stories AT ALL.
Hah, you lie! I hang out at Fraunces' Tavern all the time. You finance types are insane. At the least the Wall Streeters are, anyway.

... And I have a few good stories from back in my theatre days, but they mostly involve shows gone awry or drama between castmates/crew...etc...
Speak not to me of the theatre. I live the theatre. The theatre is blessed insanity.

[thespianphryne]

http://ffmedia.ign.com/filmforce/image/punisher-thomasjane_lg.jpg


Now someone tell me if I'm off-track here - but does that logo on his shirt just not look like a most ornate design for a hair pick?

[Typo Lad]

Oh dear G-d, I'd hate to be the person who ate that ham...

[TomStillwell]

It's was pretty good...

[Cam63]

Well, it was pretty well tenderised and marinated.

[heystacy]

Well, it was pretty well tenderised and marinated.


Yuck! :eek:

A couple of work study students told me eariler this week that someone tried to rob the grocery store. The guy wore a jumpsuit and tried to steal up to 20 steaks. I know he was gonna sell those. Talk about spoiled meat. :eek:

[Magneto_X]

I find that the bizzare stuff so repellent I end up trying to foget it. Once, at my old library, a student reported a man exposed himself to her. I tried to get her to call public saftey, but she declined. Furthermore a couple had sex in the bathroom stall. The custodial agent was so shocked she stopped cleaning. Again, I asked if she would like to call public saftey. She declined as well.

We got a lot of perverts. Guys on their hands and knees trying to peek up skirts. Exhibitionist, and vagrants.

One patron yelled at me over the phone and in person to blame me for the loss of her books, only to return to the library again with all eleven of the books she was fined for that was in "her daughter's room" the whole time.

New library I get clueless students and I am pleased for the difference.

I've worked in two libraries and nothing like that has ever happened like that. lol

[Magneto_X]

I can't speak for mall security but the internal guys at Wallmart are very good. Every single day I worked someone got a free ride to the police station. Wallmart takes asset protection very seriously, which is why I never understood why the one contracted visible security guard, me, never had anything to do with the store. I would take hour lunches fully confident in the fact that no one would check on me.

They probly had you to act as a "decoy".

It isn't common that department stores have plainclothes detectives working for them.

[heystacy]

I've worked in two libraries and nothing like that has ever happened like that. lol


Well, the second libray is tamer as far as patrons go. It is a private college library, and they have strict codes about letting the public in on a limited basis.

However both libraries have the same drama issues that is office/department politics.

Did you work at an academic library or public?

[Merey]

Hah, you lie! I hang out at Fraunces' Tavern all the time. You finance types are insane. At the least the Wall Streeters are, anyway.


Speak not to me of the theatre. I live the theatre. The theatre is blessed insanity.

Oh well, after work is a whole other story. Many good stories have accrued just from the Holiday parties alone.

And ha! Yes, the insanity of the world of theatre is a very unique and special thing and there are days I miss it. I now live it vicariously.

[Magneto_X]

Well, the second libray is tamer as far as patrons go. It is a private college library, and they have strict codes about letting the public in on a limited basis.

However both libraries have the same drama issues that is office/department politics.

Did you work at an academic library or public?

I've only worked in public libraries.

[heystacy]

I've only worked in public libraries.


This is my second academic library. The things students do are sometimes underwhelming.

The politics are the same. Different faces but same old drama.

[WhiteRose]

I, alas, have only but vaguely bizarre work stories.

I fell into a photography college receptionist job, and in my first few months I was working the evening shift. I found two of the fella students doing the nasty in one of the darkrooms, while I was closing shop for the night. Needless to say, they could not look me in the eye after that.

Then EB, when the 360 was being launched. Oh hell, we had some crazy ones. It did nothing for my hope that people may not be the morons they consistently prove to be.

Customer: I'd like a 360 please.

Me: Sorry, they're not out until December. If you like, you can put a $20 pre-order on one so you can pick it up on launch night.

Customer: Soooo...I can get one now?

Me: No, they haven't arrived, and they won't be here for a few months. Like I said, I can get you a pre-order-

Customer: *interrupting* I'd like one now please.

Me: You know what? I'm going to let you talk to Dan about getting one *waves him over*

Customer: *to Dan* I'd like a 360 please.

Dan: They're not in for a few months yet, I'm afraid. I can get put a pre-order down for you for $20 so you get it on launch. How about it?

Customer: Oh! Sure! And perhaps you should tell your STAFF *meaningful look at me* not to give misleading and incorrect information to your customers.

Me: AJBFLUGNLWGULJBCLSUCGLBLUG!

Dan: *after dealing with the customer* I'm very proud you didn't kill him Amanda.

As well as a few minor break-ins. Nothing fabulous.

[heystacy]

What is with academics? Those are some horn kids. They fuck like rabbits and anywhere. Public Saftey told me so many stories of night escapades.

[sk716]

We get customers in all the time who just want to get associates in trouble. A few years ago I was working in Electronics and there was a woman who was being a complete bitch. I don't even remember what she wanted anymore. Just a few feet away I could see the Photo Center Manager at the time lurking and waiting for this woman to demand to speak to management.

When she did the Photo Center Manager stepped over and said politely "Yes ma'am, can I help you?" At which point the woman suddenly got very polite and insisted that I was horribly rude. That's when the Photo Center Manager let her have it for being a two faced royal bitch. Ahh, those were the days.

[Night Swordsman]

We get customers in all the time who just want to get associates in trouble. A few years ago I was working in Electronics and there was a woman who was being a complete bitch. I don't even remember what she wanted anymore. Just a few feet away I could see the Photo Center Manager at the time lurking and waiting for this woman to demand to speak to management.

When she did the Photo Center Manager stepped over and said politely "Yes ma'am, can I help you?" At which point the woman suddenly got very polite and insisted that I was horribly rude. That's when the Photo Center Manager let her have it for being a two faced royal bitch. Ahh, those were the days.

LoL. I wished i had Help like that. Why i enjoy the graveyard shifts,i only put up with customer crap for about 2 hours,during which i am usally stressed out and running around like crazy.

And SK? Just share our Hot Wheel Collector horror stories. That ALONE will make people NEVER want to work in retail toy clerk position. (shudder).

[heystacy]

We get customers in all the time who just want to get associates in trouble. A few years ago I was working in Electronics and there was a woman who was being a complete bitch. I don't even remember what she wanted anymore. Just a few feet away I could see the Photo Center Manager at the time lurking and waiting for this woman to demand to speak to management.

When she did the Photo Center Manager stepped over and said politely "Yes ma'am, can I help you?" At which point the woman suddenly got very polite and insisted that I was horribly rude. That's when the Photo Center Manager let her have it for being a two faced royal bitch. Ahh, those were the days.


Sounds like Verizon Wireless. When I was a customer service rep this guy called in to report his phone stolen. He was cool until I told him he had to contact the insurance company. He went from empathetic to a roayl bastard. he fought with me becuase I wasn't going to call them. I was like I can't report your phone stolen. That's fraud. You have to.

He bitched until he spoke with the manager, and then he was kind and polite. he had no idea I was listening to the exchange with my manager. He was a royal asshole. Still he had to call the insurance.

[Lester C.]

I worked in retail when I was a teenager. Never again. You have to have a very high level of patience in order to do well in retail especially when dealing with vicious assholes that get off on treating people like shit because they can and they know that they will get their way if they do so. I knew I had to get out, when I started to hate people in general.

[Sally Sensational]

I worked in retail when I was a teenager. Never again. You have to have a very high level of patience in order to do well in retail especially when dealing with vicious assholes that get off on treating people like shit because they can and they know that they will get their way if they do so. I knew I had to get out, when I started to hate people in general.

My favorite retail story:

I was managing a Bugle Boy jeans store and a very, um, ghetto lady came up to the counter and asked if we had any, and I quote "pink pantses".

I told her, no, we didn't carry any pink pants. She then asked me why, if we had pink shirts, we had no "pink pantses". She wasn't rude or anything, but it was all I could do to keep from laughing when she told me that the reason she needed the "pink pantses" was because her man had a pink shirt and wanted "pink pantses" to match it.

I apologized sincerely and repeated that we did not have any pink pants that would match his shirt.

She then looked at me and asked why any man would want "pink pantses" anyway. When I didn't answer right away, she answered her own question by stating quite definitively that "he must just be a pussy."

My associate and I did manage to wait until she left the store and was out of earshot before we collapsed with laughter.

[thespianphryne]

. . .

I was managing a Bugle Boy jeans store and a very, um, ghetto lady came up to the counter and asked if we had any, and I quote "pink pantses".

. . .

I apologized sincerely and repeated that we did not have any pink pants that would match his shirt.

She then looked at me and asked why any man would want "pink pantses" anyway. When I didn't answer right away, she answered her own question by stating quite definitively that "he must just be a pussy."

Ah hah ha ha ha haa...!

*and that's the sound of bacon egg sandwich being vacuumed up from between the keys*

[heystacy]

My favorite retail story:

I was managing a Bugle Boy jeans store and a very, um, ghetto lady came up to the counter and asked if we had any, and I quote "pink pantses".

I told her, no, we didn't carry any pink pants. She then asked me why, if we had pink shirts, we had no "pink pantses". She wasn't rude or anything, but it was all I could do to keep from laughing when she told me that the reason she needed the "pink pantses" was because her man had a pink shirt and wanted "pink pantses" to match it.

I apologized sincerely and repeated that we did not have any pink pants that would match his shirt.

She then looked at me and asked why any man would want "pink pantses" anyway. When I didn't answer right away, she answered her own question by stating quite definitively that "he must just be a pussy."

My associate and I did manage to wait until she left the store and was out of earshot before we collapsed with laughter.


Ok that's still funny!!!! I said I would never do retail, and after Disney World, swore off food and beverage.

Cari did shoes at Sears, and I don't know how she did it. Oh sweet goodness, NEVER shoes.