SreepYeldarb
09-25-2006, 06:39 PM
Hi all, I am new to this forum. After finding a post that somebody posted on here about past problems with there girlfriend I figured why not give it a shot and see what you'll have to say.
Heres the deal:
I have met this girl and she is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Recently she just broke up with her EX boyfriend. From what she has told me so far, she has gone through hell with him but at the same time she misses the way he used to treat her in a "loving" way. I want to be with her but at the same time I want to give her room to get over what has happened. Now, being my shy, lame-self, when I am around her I give her her space and semi get near her but nothing extravagant, thus meaning I dont really try to "love" her. I dont want to her to feel like I am pushing myself onto her. Me and her have talked about the way she feels and I am acceptive of the fact that she feels that way. I have even told her that if she wanted to start talking to her EX again so she would be "happy" so to speak, then I am not going to think bad of her or degrade her for doing that. I am trying to be supportive of her decisions. I told her that if she ever needed anything that I was here for her but much to my avail it seems as if she forgets about me. What I mean is, I call her, she doesn't pick up. I leave her messages, she never returns them (i've only done that once). I have made myself perfectly clear to her that I am not out to hurt her that I want to be there for her. Yet, I know that is what every guy tells a girl then in the end they end up getting hurt. I just want her to think more of me rather than dwelling on her past with her EX. IS there anything I can do to try and ease her mind? Also, I wish she would make up her mind and stop throwing me around persay. What I mean is, one day she'll be telling me that she is having these dreams about her EX and she starts crying because her feelings for him are intense. When she tells me this stuff it makes me think if she is even interested in me at all. Then the next day she tells me that I am the "perfect" guy for her that I am everything she ever wanted and then some. Because as far as I know, I have pretty much givin here everything that she wants. Now, her comes the kicker...
When I am around her I feel wierd. She has this akward attitude towards me, well, not just me, but anybody. Its kinda like the "I dont care attitude" but in the same sense I know she cares, shes just not showing it. Ok, back to what I was saying. When I am around her I am not physically "close" to her. Eventhough I want to be that way, I just feel wierd about being that way towards her until I know she is alright. She tells me that it is ok, to be "close" to her but still, I dont know. Also, in the same sense I feel like a shy bastard because she is so damn pretty. I swear, I feel that anything I do could yield disasterous results, meaning that she'll get mad at me for something and I dont want that. Eventhough she tells me that its "ok", should I proceed in giving her my affection and love for her? I haven't really done that yet, but then again we only hung out twice and before then, I didnt even know her, I just kind of blindly met her. I thought it would be nice to get her some flowers since nobody has ever done that, so I did. All I got was a smile and a "Thank you". Which to me is enough to make me happy. I am not with her for sex. I am not with her for her looks. All I am after is for her to be happy. Am I doing something wrong?
P.S. keep in mind that I am not a ladies man either so any suggestions as to help me out on trying to make her happy would help too. If you need more information, i'd be glad to share. Just let me know.
Thanks,
-Bradley
Heres the deal:
I have met this girl and she is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Recently she just broke up with her EX boyfriend. From what she has told me so far, she has gone through hell with him but at the same time she misses the way he used to treat her in a "loving" way. I want to be with her but at the same time I want to give her room to get over what has happened. Now, being my shy, lame-self, when I am around her I give her her space and semi get near her but nothing extravagant, thus meaning I dont really try to "love" her. I dont want to her to feel like I am pushing myself onto her. Me and her have talked about the way she feels and I am acceptive of the fact that she feels that way. I have even told her that if she wanted to start talking to her EX again so she would be "happy" so to speak, then I am not going to think bad of her or degrade her for doing that. I am trying to be supportive of her decisions. I told her that if she ever needed anything that I was here for her but much to my avail it seems as if she forgets about me. What I mean is, I call her, she doesn't pick up. I leave her messages, she never returns them (i've only done that once). I have made myself perfectly clear to her that I am not out to hurt her that I want to be there for her. Yet, I know that is what every guy tells a girl then in the end they end up getting hurt. I just want her to think more of me rather than dwelling on her past with her EX. IS there anything I can do to try and ease her mind? Also, I wish she would make up her mind and stop throwing me around persay. What I mean is, one day she'll be telling me that she is having these dreams about her EX and she starts crying because her feelings for him are intense. When she tells me this stuff it makes me think if she is even interested in me at all. Then the next day she tells me that I am the "perfect" guy for her that I am everything she ever wanted and then some. Because as far as I know, I have pretty much givin here everything that she wants. Now, her comes the kicker...
When I am around her I feel wierd. She has this akward attitude towards me, well, not just me, but anybody. Its kinda like the "I dont care attitude" but in the same sense I know she cares, shes just not showing it. Ok, back to what I was saying. When I am around her I am not physically "close" to her. Eventhough I want to be that way, I just feel wierd about being that way towards her until I know she is alright. She tells me that it is ok, to be "close" to her but still, I dont know. Also, in the same sense I feel like a shy bastard because she is so damn pretty. I swear, I feel that anything I do could yield disasterous results, meaning that she'll get mad at me for something and I dont want that. Eventhough she tells me that its "ok", should I proceed in giving her my affection and love for her? I haven't really done that yet, but then again we only hung out twice and before then, I didnt even know her, I just kind of blindly met her. I thought it would be nice to get her some flowers since nobody has ever done that, so I did. All I got was a smile and a "Thank you". Which to me is enough to make me happy. I am not with her for sex. I am not with her for her looks. All I am after is for her to be happy. Am I doing something wrong?
P.S. keep in mind that I am not a ladies man either so any suggestions as to help me out on trying to make her happy would help too. If you need more information, i'd be glad to share. Just let me know.
Thanks,
-Bradley