When did you move out of your parents' house? [Archive]

Jeff Brady

07-03-2006, 04:36 PM

I started hacking at the cord when I was 17 and starting college (1996). I was finally able to afford a place in the city when I was 22 (this was in March/April, 2001).

Absolutely my choice - as in: "get me the fuck out of here!"

Financially, it was fine. I was renting a room in Prospect Heights, Brooklyn (near Atlantic Center, about 10/15 blocks from Rocketship) for $400/month, heat, hot water, cable & electricity included. I had a cell phone. No internet access. I could afford to buy comics, toys, CDs and DVDs on a weekly basis, and still pay all of my bills.

Then I moved to Astoria, almost two years ago (one more month!). My share of the rent is $525. Cable/internet is $33 for me (other roommates pay $30). Gas & electricity is in another roommate's name, so we even out. Every time I spend money on fun stuff, I go just a little deeper into debt. It's not too bad, and I have it under control (no, I really do).

Moving out had as less to do with my career than it did with where I could live and not go insane, and not have to learn to drive, and where all my friends lived.

Valmore

07-03-2006, 04:37 PM

October of 2002. I moved to New Hampshire. Been out ever since.

Cyke

07-03-2006, 04:44 PM

I moved out when I was 19, in order to cut the commute to school (and because, yes, I did want to get away from home). It was September of 2001, and I'm wondering if my timing was just a bit off.

howyadoin

07-03-2006, 04:52 PM

Moving out had as less to do with my career than it did with where I could live and not go insane, and not have to learn to drive...This is a priority?

Grazzt

07-03-2006, 04:59 PM

This is a priority?

Sadly, I can relate. My parents were never willing to take me out to practice driving, and I really suck at it naturally, so I can't pass the tests. This necessitates being within public transport distance of everything, otherwise I can't afford to leave the house. Which means getting out of a rural area and moving into a city.

Naldo

07-03-2006, 05:02 PM

I was 17 when I left for University, came back to live with my dad just before and just after my mom died when I was 24, left after about 6 months. I'm 42 now.

Jeff Brady

07-03-2006, 05:06 PM

This is a priority?

How much does a car cost? Insurance? Gas? Repairs?

Also, I have sidewalk rage. Put me behind the wheel, and I become a weapon of mass destruction.

And everything Grazzt said.

Guapo Méndez

07-03-2006, 05:08 PM

I was 24, me and my wife were ready to get married. We saved up for a year, got a few family loans and we had our house built in 4 months. The house cost us back then around 15,000.

Three years later, I got low, low, low interest government loan to build the second story. The loan was for 17,000 and the monthly payments are 120, controlled for 15 years. I'm 10 years away from repaying it and it doesn't hurt my finances one bit.

shadowraven

07-03-2006, 05:53 PM

I moved out to attend University when I was 19 (we had 5 years of highschool in Ontario back when I attended). After undergrad, I moved back home temporarily to save a little money, and pay off some debts. Six months later, I was back to living on my own again.

Those six months seemed like an eternity. Living with your parents at 23 when you have been independant for the last four years is not a fun thing.

Merey

07-03-2006, 05:59 PM

18. I went away for college. I only spent one college summer at the 'rents house. The rest of the summers I worked and lived on campus. Oh, and I moved back in with my Dad for a year after graduating. I saved up some money and then moved across country to NY.

Merey

07-03-2006, 06:05 PM

My share of the rent is $525. Cable/internet is $33 for me (other roommates pay $30).

Seriously? I paid $850 (rent and all utilities) when I was sharing an apt. over near the Ditmars stops. oh, but how many roommates do you have? In any case, I bet your apt. is larger than my old one. It was a cute, newly renovated place but it was tiny. I mean tiny even by NYC standards.

Edited to add:

How much does a car cost? Insurance? Gas? Repairs?

Also, I have sidewalk rage. Put me behind the wheel, and I become a weapon of mass destruction.

Oh, I can sympathize. One of the reasons I moved here from California was to get away from the car culture. My car died and I just didn't want to buy a new one. I HATED non-stop San Diego traffic, all the car related costs and up-keep...etc..

Jeff Brady

07-03-2006, 06:06 PM

Those six months seemed like an eternity. Living with your parents at 23 when you have been independant for the last four years is not a fun thing.

Ugh. TELL ME about it.

I saved up some money and then moved across country to NY.

Ah, so you're definitely not from around here! Very cool.

Kid Omega

07-03-2006, 06:17 PM

I moved out for college at 17.

I lived in Manhattan for several years. (i'm originally from Tennessee)

I had a nervous breakdown when I was 23, and moved back home and lived in my parent's guest house for 2 years, with some travelling and living other places thrown in here and there. Some folks here probably remember it... it was a severely low point in my life, and I was in bad shape. I posted on CBR a LOT in those days.

I moved back to the city and found and apartment in Brooklyn. I've been here ever since.

Merey

07-03-2006, 06:33 PM

You know, moving back in with my Dad after college wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I mean, I sort of resented that I had to take a step back from the independence I had achieved over those previous 4 years, but I was lucky that my Dad and I got along so well. I think of that time as the start of the transition of our adult daughter and father relationship.

Also, I think it's a brave move to admit to yourself that for all the independence you'd garnered, that sometimes you do need help in the form of crashing with the parents. I have a friend who (after a stint of trying to make it as an actress here in NYC) just moved back in with her parents again for the second time since undergrad. She's 32. And I know she's been really depressed, but if it weren't for her parents she'd be in a much worse place. Anyway, she's starting to turn her life around and I hope she comes back to NYC someday.

Yeah, I'm bored this evening. I could probably go on forever with my moving out/moving in anecdotes. ;)

Shellhead

07-03-2006, 06:50 PM

I'm still living with my parents, but I'm curious as to when you guys left your homes (permanently). Was it voluntary or did they kick you out? Initially, how bad was it financially? Where did you go to live?

I still need some time to sort myself out in terms of career.

I was 19 years old, about halfway into the fall semester of my second year in college (just a few credits shy of being a junior already, thanks to A.P. tests and summer classes). My dad had just graduated from college the previous spring and now had just accepted a job offer in his new profession, in a small town in a different state. They packed up and moved out while I was busy with mid-terms.

It was voluntary on my part, because I had the option of transferring to a college in that state and hopefully qualifying for in-state tuition there like I already had in Indiana. Instead, my best friend's family offered me a place to stay with them during holidays and summer breaks, in hopes that I would set a good example for my friend. He was thinking about signing up with the Marines, which they thought was a macho waste of time.

Financially, it was fine at first. They weren't charging me rent, and I kept working at a part-time job... dorm cafeteria while in school, and McDonald's during the holidays and summer break.

A couple of years later, things fell apart with the friend's family. My friend eventually did join the Marine Reserves. While he was in boot camp, I turned 21 and threw a huge keg party. (His parents and siblings lived in a big house about a quarter of a mile away from the converted barn where my friend and I were living, on one large parcel of land. I dropped a keg on my friend's car windshield by accident, and after that, they just wanted me out.

Then the financial pain began. I managed to struggle through to graduation living in a cheap studio apartment, but car problems and student loan payments conspired to keep me financially struggling for most of my 20's, until I finally passed the CPA exam and nearly doubled my income. Near the end of those tough times, I quit a job without finding a new one, during the '91-'92 recession, and moved in with my uncle here in the Twin Cities until I could get back on my feet financially. My parents loaned me money periodically during that rough stretch. They also paid about 25% of my college costs.

Long story short, I moved out at age 19, but wasn't financially independent until age 28.

K'Nort

07-03-2006, 07:22 PM

Right out of high school, I went off to college 1100 miles away. I came home during the first two summers to save money, but the third summer, when I was 20, my mother said they would charge me rent so I stayed put. And I was completely self-financing college as it was.

The media was full of stories about all these early-20s Generation-X kids graduating college and moving back in with their parents, and avoiding that fate was my mother's highest priority. She saw it as enabling and such. Fortunately, it was never an issue for me. After college, I moved even further away (to another state this time) and muddled through. Food stamps were involved, but I managed. That whole rugged macho last frontier thing.

shadowraven

07-03-2006, 08:13 PM

Right out of high school, I went off to college 1100 miles away. I came home during the first two summers to save money, but the third summer, when I was 20, my mother said they would charge me rent so I stayed put. And I was completely self-financing college as it was.

I would like to move to a different continent for awhile after I finish my master's degree. Save for four months in Florida earlier in the year, I've lived my entire life within a 100Km radius in Southern Ontario.

If I could get a PhD placement in Western Europe or Australia with a tuition waiver, I'd go without thinking twice.

gary bolt

07-03-2006, 08:51 PM

I got a job at a small furniture factory when I finished high school (we made water beds) but the company eventually went under. I was still living with my parents and hating the small town I grew up in so when the job disappeared I applied for a gov't work-skills program called Katimavik and got to work in Newfoundland, Saskatchewan and Quebec. I was 19 at the time and started college a couple of months after I got back from Katimavik. I lived in a room-and-board situation for my first semester of college and moved in with a girl I met at school in second semester. We got married several years later and we're still together. Last year I had the strange realization that I've lived with my wife longer than I lived with my parents.

Sir Tim Drake

07-03-2006, 08:59 PM

When I was 18, I moved to Providence to go to college. I spent my first two summer vacations at home, then stayed in Providence for the next two summers, then moved from there to Hanover for one year. Now I'm back at home temporarily until I go off to Gainesville next month.

I still feel as though I haven't entirely moved out. All my books and comics are still in this house, and I still list it as my permanent address. It might be a while before I have a permanent home of my own.

Shellhead

07-03-2006, 09:36 PM

Seriously? I paid $850 (rent and all utilities) when I was sharing an apt. over near the Ditmars stops. oh, but how many roommates do you have? In any case, I bet your apt. is larger than my old one. It was a cute, newly renovated place but it was tiny. I mean tiny even by NYC standards.

Wow. Housing costs in New York City and southern California always shock me.

I live alone in the Twin Cities (St. Paul, specifically), and I'm currently paying $815 a month for a one-bedroom apartment with 800 square feet. I have a nice view of some big trees from my balcony, two walk-in closets, and a parking space in a heated garage. That rent covers all utilities except electricity, which is generally another $20 per month. I'm only 5 miles from work, 6 miles from downtown St. Paul, and 8 miles from downtown Minneapolis.

Cei-U!

07-03-2006, 09:36 PM

I left home at 17 to go to college, stayed with my folks for around 8 months after graduating (while paying them $120/month rent) and have been on my own for the subsequent 25 years.

Cei-U!
I summon the cut apronstrings!

Corsair

07-03-2006, 09:43 PM

My parents moved out when I was 20.

Seriously.

My parents were getting a divorce, so my dad had moved out. When everything was settled, they both ended up with a half interest in the house. My mom's parents apparently weren't happy with this, so they set my mom up with a place of her own. She and my younger brothers moved out, but as the new place was farther away from where I was working, I stayed behind.

It was kind of nice. I took over paying the utilities and had a three bedroom house all to myself. There wasn't much in it, since all I had was my bedroom set, a microwave and a coffee pot, but still...

About six months later my mom started having a series of nervous breakdowns and my dad ended up with the kids. They all moved back in (needed the space) and I moved out, splitting an apartment with a buddy of mine and his girlfriend.

Word of advice - as a single, don't ever, ever share an apartment with a couple. Drove me nuts, so I moved into my own place less than a year later.

Chiasm

07-03-2006, 09:47 PM

Moved out by my own choice, my mom would have gladly let me stay, a week after graduating high school at the age of 18. Went to college 3 months later and except for two summer breaks never lived with my mom again.

I was mostly independent financially although my mom did occasionally give me money but I'm proud to say I never had to ask her for any. I worked my ass off in college, often 40 hrs a week while maintaining a full credit load.

Its part of the reason I have little sympathy now for those who live at home sponging off their parents into their 20's. While admittedly I wasn't 100% financially independent of my mom I was about 95% independent. Yet I see so many leeching 20 somethings who act like their parents owe them money rather than vice versa. :mad:

And the fact I worked hard then has paid off in life as I manage my money well. I have ZERO credit card debt and other than my house have no debt at all.

jessecuster3

07-03-2006, 09:50 PM

I left home(Chicago) at 18 to go to college in Atlanta. After graduation I came home for a few months stying with my parents and then moved back to Atlanta for 4 more years. When jobs dried up in down south, I came back to Chicago and stayed with my parents for another few months till I found a job and movd back out. I have been living alone and moving to St Louis and back in the last 5 years, and now I came back to stay with my dad, while I looked for a job and am now in the hunt to move back out.

So I guess technically I have lived on my own for 15 years, with a few month stints when I needed a place to crash. It was never "you have to move out", and I certainly wasn't doing it to get away from my parents. it has always been much more of a I appreciate the freedom.

howyadoin

07-03-2006, 09:55 PM

Word of advice - as a single, don't ever, ever share an apartment with a couple.Absolutely. You'll be outvoted in every decision, and inevitably treated as a second-class citizen.

Jeff Brady

07-03-2006, 10:01 PM

Absolutely. You'll be outvoted in every decision, and inevitable treated as a second-class citizen.

That, and you get to hear them every time they bump uglies. Or get caught between them when they fight.

howyadoin

07-03-2006, 10:03 PM

That, and you get to hear them every time they bump uglies.And yet, if you bring someone noisy home, you'll get snotty attitudes in response.

Dan Apodaca

07-03-2006, 10:14 PM

Its part of the reason I have little sympathy now for those who live at home sponging off their parents into their 20's.

Just so you know, we don't really care if you have sympathy for us. We just want you to get off our case.

Iangould

07-04-2006, 12:31 AM

I stayed, my parents moved out.

Justin Davis

07-04-2006, 01:34 AM

I moved out when I was 20. Lived a couple cities over, worked a full-time job, and took some basic courses at a community college before moving away to go to college about a year and half later in a city just over an hour away from there. After college, I moved back down to the Gulf Coast to work a few jobs before teaching for a few years. After Hurricane Katrina, I moved to Austin. Hopefully soon, I can be financially stable again. As for the first move being financially difficult, yeah, it definitely was at times. I'm not going to lie, I got in over my head at times. Honestly though, if I would've been more careful with my money, I could've lived a lot more comfortably without as much worrying about paying the next power bill or some other such thing. Still, I didn't gain weight when I first moved out like many say. Instead, I lost it. I didn't eat that much differently than I do now, but my metabolism was still high so it burned through whatever I ate quickly. Once I moved away to college, got some college financial aid money, and didn't have to pay as much for monthly living costs, my weight went back to a decent number. That's something people don't tell you. Moving can seriously mess with your digestive system. At least it does with mine. Just recently, mine has settled down to where I don't have to make sure I have plenty of reading material when I go to the bathroom.

Sentry

07-04-2006, 02:27 AM

When i was 18, went to art college and then uni. But offically moved out in 2002.

I have lived in maybe 7 houses since i was 18 but all have been grand in their own way. (Except one buts thats another story for another day).

K'Nort

07-04-2006, 05:15 AM

I would like to move to a different continent for awhile after I finish my master's degree. Save for four months in Florida earlier in the year, I've lived my entire life within a 100Km radius in Southern Ontario.

If I could get a PhD placement in Western Europe or Australia with a tuition waiver, I'd go without thinking twice.

That's an excellent idea. How exciting! I was originally going to London with a fiance right after finishing my BA, but ended up in Portland OR (alone) on a weird impulse instead. On average, the older you get, with more stuff and responsibilities and dependents, the harder it is to explore, so take the chance when you have it. It's not like you have to stay if you decide you don't like it.

GreenHornet

07-04-2006, 06:15 AM

Back in 1982 I joined the Navy before my 18th birthday ( had to get my folks to sign me in) Did 20 years and retired and have never had to move back,

Forefinger

07-04-2006, 06:22 AM

Tish-the-Scorpion

07-04-2006, 06:58 AM

around 95 i was 17 at the time...but i would always go back home to check on my younger halfs and my mom since my dad was locked up.

mattbib

07-04-2006, 09:37 AM

I moved out the first time when I was 19, mostly my mom's decision, but was back living with my mom within a year. I moved out finally, on my own decision, when I was 23.

Athena Bast

07-04-2006, 09:48 AM

I first moved out at 20 for a job out west in Alberta. After about 10 months I lost my job there and had no place to go but back home.

After about 4 years later friends at the time were moving in together and invited me to live with them. I needed move out because I would have committed patricide if I didn't.

Good thing - moving out across the harbour away from family.

Bad thing - moving in with HER. She was 18 on her 3rd fiancee. She'd been engaged to all her boyfriends since 13. She had daddy issues worse than mine.

Then 2 years after that I moved into a 1BR and it was sweet for 3 months and my boyfriend of 2 months moved in. That was a year ago.

Dan Apodaca

07-04-2006, 01:06 PM

I moved out when I was eighteen, about three months after graduating high school. I was ready to gte the fuck out. But I was also completely unprepared for living on my own, and eventually moved back home about a year later.

And then I moved out again at 19. I was a lot more prepared this time, and lived a more comfortable, saner life. Unfortunately, I got laid off from my job and had an immense amount of trouble finding another one. So I moved back home after about 10 months.

And I've been living here since, which would be about 8 months.

I'll be moving out again as soon as I have a new steady job and some money saved up.

Lord of Denial

07-04-2006, 03:20 PM

I have never lived without one parent in my home. When I was 24 my dad wanted to retire and found out that he would not be getting his full retirement package so I bought my folks home and they stayed with me for several years. Then I got married and had a home build from my new family and my father passed away and I and my wife felt that my mom needed to be with family and I sold my childhood home and my mom moved in with us.

JeffreyWKramer

07-04-2006, 04:43 PM

I left for college just over 2 months past my 18th birthday. I lived at home again for the summer after my freshman year, but never again. So, I was out for good at 19.

Jade69/Legolaslady

07-04-2006, 04:47 PM

I moved some of my belongings with me to college, and while I was gone our house was finally sold, so the rest went to my grandmother's and my parents moved to another state. I've stayed with my grandmother *thinks* 3 times since then, but the last was about 5 years ago when I was 21 after the apartment I was living in had a fire, and only for 6 months to time right for a one year lease at my own place before I got married. After I um asked my ex to move out I stayed at the apartment for a few months on my own, but it got to be too much.
A friend of mine at work was having trouble making her house payment so I've moved in with her to pay 1/2 (If i could get a $430 house payment oooooh boy) and I'm currently planning on moving in with Sam probably in the fall :)
As far as finances, that's a bit of a long story.

Dan Apodaca

07-04-2006, 05:07 PM

Does going to college count as moving out?

I guess if you paid your own rent, or payed for college yourself and lived at the dorm, then it would be.

i_mmmchocolate

07-04-2006, 05:19 PM

Does going to college count as moving out?

I guess if you paid your own rent, or payed for college yourself and lived at the dorm, then it would be.

Not really, unless it's a permanent move. I wouldn't consider my first two years of college as moving out of my parents' house because I still used their address as a 'permanent address'.

Dan Apodaca

07-04-2006, 05:25 PM

Not really, unless it's a permanent move. I wouldn't consider my first two years of college as moving out of my parents' house because I still used their address as a 'permanent address'.

I also feel like it doesn't really count if you're not paying for it, you know?

Like, I know all these kids who are staying in dorms that their parents pay for, and to me, that doesn't count. Until you know what it's like to pay rent and utilities, and be completely responsible for anything that happens in that place, you don't know what it's like to have moved out.

i_mmmchocolate

07-04-2006, 05:28 PM

I also feel like it doesn't really count if you're not paying for it, you know?

Like, I know all these kids who are staying in dorms that their parents pay for, and to me, that doesn't count. Until you know what it's like to pay rent and utilities, and be completely responsible for anything that happens in that place, you don't know what it's like to have moved out.

Exactly. My first two years away was like being at home, but without the parental supervision.

i_mmmchocolate

07-04-2006, 05:29 PM

Oops, double post!

Boomshakalakalaka!

zilch

07-04-2006, 11:49 PM

Lived at home with parents until i was married at age 29.

we moved into an apartment and remained there until moving out last June. we lived there for 15 years @ $340 a month (one bedroom)

We now live in a condo that we're purchacing ($700 a month, $114 for condo fees, 1200+ sqft)

Housing prices in STL are still pretty cheap.

Justin Davis

07-05-2006, 01:06 AM

I also feel like it doesn't really count if you're not paying for it, you know?

Like, I know all these kids who are staying in dorms that their parents pay for, and to me, that doesn't count. Until you know what it's like to pay rent and utilities, and be completely responsible for anything that happens in that place, you don't know what it's like to have moved out.

I feel the same. I see a lot of people saying, "I moved out to go to college and live in a dorm," but that's not the same thing. Once you get an apartment, that's some wholly different. I never lived in a dorm so I had never had the experience that went with that.

Forefinger

07-05-2006, 07:19 AM

Oops, double post!

Boomshakalakalaka!
Now that was an awesome double post edit.

Lubichev

07-05-2006, 07:21 AM

I had just turned seventeen. My birthday present to myself.

borateen

07-05-2006, 07:28 AM

I stopped listing my parents' address as my permanent address the day after the last day of classes of the spring semester of my junior year of college. I was moving out of the dorms and into an apartment, and they were moving to another state, so I thought it only wise to do that.

Before that, I was a regular visitor home (only 80 minutes away) and still had my room set up there, so I still considered myself living there.

Lone Ranger

07-05-2006, 07:32 AM

This is a bit tough to answer.

I was in university (undergrad, law school and grad school) for 8 straight years from age 18 to 26. I alway lived away from Toronto (Montreal and Halifax) and paid for my own rent.

That being said, there was always a place for me at my parents' house, if I was home over Christmas or had a summer job in Toronto.

I was 26 when I finally moved back to Toronto permanently and go my own apartment here, so I guess that's the official timing - although I'd been paying rent elsewhere since age 18, and my apartmetn address was always my permanent address for bills, voting etc...

TinMan

07-05-2006, 07:38 AM

Moved out when I was 18, 2 months after I graduated from high school. I came up to Grand Rapids to go to school, paid for my own apartment and everything. I worked about 60 hours a week and went to school full time for the first year just to do it, but I have never regretted it. Been livin on my own (minus the time I was helpin a couple buddies out cause they needed a place to stay and my younger brother livin w/ me now) for the past 5 years and have never been back, nor will I ever go back, to my parents house.

Dr. Hfuhruhurr

07-05-2006, 07:43 AM

When I went to college at age 18. I did live in the dorms, but since I paid for board out of my scholarship, I figure that counts as being out on my own.

Merey

07-05-2006, 09:28 AM

When I went to college at age 18. I did live in the dorms, but since I paid for board out of my scholarship, I figure that counts as being out on my own.

I agree. I paid for college myself using loans, so I count my dorm living as complete independence from my parents. At least, I refuse to see it any other way because I'm paying off those loans now and the only satisfaction I get from that is knowing that it was all worth it. I needed to move out at 18 and I'm just happy I had the resources in the form of loans to do it.

Azrael52

07-05-2006, 09:35 AM

I prefer the term "Roommates." Thanks.

Forefinger

07-05-2006, 11:42 AM

Does living in your parent's basement count as moving out since you aren't really in the house? Because if it doesn't, Tinman doesn't live on his own. That's right; you live in mommy's basement, Tinman!!!!

SUCK IT!

*does DX chop*

phoenixrising

07-05-2006, 05:08 PM

I officially moved out when I was 19. I had already been at college for a year and moved into my first apartment that summer. I was told when I went away to college, I was told I couldn't move back home again as my room was converted into a guest room/office.

I did end up staying with my parents again for two months after graduating grad school - but I definitely wouldn't consider it "moving back in". I lived out of a suitcase and left as soon as I got my job here. My mom called it an "extended visit" - and she loved having someone around to help out. All in all, I'm happy for the "don't come back" rule - I was never tempted to fall back on them when I probably could have.