Sarcasm & Snark

[howyadoin]

Nope, this isn't another thread about the supposedly sad state of the boards these days. What I wanna talk about instead is your favourite putdowns and snotty comments from reviews, articles, and DJs. It's pretty easy to go too far, but up to that point, people say some hilarious shit.

Case in point: the new Rolling Stone has an article of Fall Out Boy, and there's a bit about the singer going out to meet some fans:
The girls swarm him, ponytails flying, as they snap cellphone pictures destined for purple-bordered MySpace pages.Anybody else got a favourite putdown?

[Eliot Johnson]

Radiohead + Crack = Muse

(Now, I like Muse a lot, but I nearly fell out of my seat laughing the first time I heard that)

[Sanagi]

I was hoping Sarcasm & Snark was the name of a band.

[howyadoin]

I was hoping Sarcasm & Snark was the name of a band.Register it while you can!

[glue]

I don't know how many people remember ego trip, but that magazine had the most sarcastic, snarky reviews I've ever read.

[Adam Crocker]

Anybody else got a favourite putdown?

This review (http://www.pitchforkmedia.com/record-reviews/o/oasis/heathen-chemistry.shtml) of Oasis' Heathen Chemistry is possibly the funniest piece of snark I've read on Pitchfork, or in regards to music in general (without going into deliberate parody like Your Band Sucks on Somethingawful.com).

[tangentman]

Remember that release by Elektra where modern artists covered classic tunes? Came out in the early 90's? The Cure covered The Doors' "Hello, I Love You" and received a scathing review from either Rolling Stone or Spin. IIRC, the critic described Robert Smith's vocals as "belligerent squawking". When I showed that review to a friend at work, he and I laughed our asses off for the rest of the day. At random points, one of us would bring up "belligerent squawking" and the laugh-fests ensued!

[Buried Alien]

I was hoping Sarcasm & Snark was the name of a band.

Here's an idea: start a band called "Sarcasm & Snark" and have the band play nothing but lightweight, cheerful pop tunes.

Buried Alien (The Fastest Post Alive!)

[Adam Crocker]

Here's an idea: start a band called "Sarcasm & Snark" and have the band play nothing but lightweight, cheerful pop tunes.

Reminds me of my desire to make an album with a bunch of fresh-faced, clean-cut young men that look like something out of a sixties guitar pop band and title it "Twenty Power Pop Greats," and it's all skronky noise rock.

[Valmore]

One time, Rolling Stone had reviews of the new Matchbox 20 and Pearl Jam ablums coming out, and they had a cartoon with Rob Thomas and Eddie Vedder arguing back and forth to win the adoration of a young female listener. Thomas yells to Vedder, "Go back to Neil Young" and Vedder retorts with, "Go back to Carlos Santana" as they both snark at each other. In the end, the girl runs off with Sisqo.

[(A)//(E)]

Pete Shelley (or was it Steve Diggle) of the Buzzcocks on Green Day: "I don't know who those guys are, but they're not punks." After Billy Joe was all excited to meet them. Heh. Burn.

[howyadoin]

Just remembered a review in the old Rolling Stone Record Guide. The band was Sins of Satan, and the album was Thou Shalt Boogie Forever.

The review? "Lunch break's over. Back on your heads!"

[JeffreyWKramer]

Just remembered a review in the old Rolling Stone Record Guide. The band was Sins of Satan, and the album was Thou Shalt Boogie Forever.

The review? "Lunch break's over. Back on your heads!"


The Record Guides were chock full of wonderful snark n sarcasm reviews. Wonderful stuff.

[thehod]

I can remember an NME (or was it Melody Maker) review of Depeche Modes new rock style in the early nineties that was just (and I'm paraphrasing from memory a bit here)

"Rearrange these words into a popular phrase or saying:
bandwagon they're jumping the fucking on just grunge."

That tickled me.

[Maleficentogre]

pretty much every review from IGN Music. not because they're particularly clever or anyhing. but because they suck so bad. Everything there is just funny for the wrong reasons. That and it has the most typos for any professional site ever.

[JeffreyWKramer]

I recall back before the reboot, someone here on CBR - was it Bored? - wonderfully described Jim Morrison as a "pretentious twat-loaf" in part of a longer, bust-your-gut-laughing discussion of the Doors.

[Adam Crocker]

I recall back before the reboot, someone here on CBR - was it Bored? - wonderfully described Jim Morrison as a "pretentious twat-loaf" in part of a longer, bust-your-gut-laughing discussion of the Doors.

That's pretty good. But I doubt it holds a candle to what Danny Fields had to say about him, then again it was a longer rant.

[Adam Crocker]

Pete Shelley (or was it Steve Diggle) of the Buzzcocks on Green Day: "I don't know who those guys are, but they're not punks." After Billy Joe was all excited to meet them. Heh. Burn.

Apparently it was Diggle (http://www.cambridge-news.co.uk/lifestyle/arts_music/news/2006/03/09/f425dcd8-04b3-4b8e-b066-94d9e9ca8878.lpf) who met them backstage at the Kerrang awards and was quite drunk. He didn't know who they were and also said (http://breaking.tcm.ie/2006/02/25/story246411.html) "They're alright. They're nice guys, and I think it's a compliment they are inspired by us. But they are a watered down version of the original."

But even better is the headline for the last link:


"Diggle urges Green day to be original"

[Eric D.]

Vibe on Kevin Federline's Album, Playing With Fire:



His constipated, region-nonspecific flow overwhelms even the most flamboyant beats